


A Little Night Music (Eine Kleine Nachtmusik)

by Mikauzoran



Series: Springtime in Wonderland [4]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Adrien Agreste is a Lightweight for Affection, Adrien is a tease, Adrien is not in a good place mentally sometimes, Aged-Up (28 and 30), Dysfunctional Relationships, F/M, Family Dynamics, Flirting, Fluff, Friendship, Hot Mess Adrien Agreste, Hurt/Comfort, Luka is not in a good place mentally sometimes, Luka tries to be good but Adrien makes it so difficult, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Multi, Music Nerds, Mutual Pining, Pining, Relationship Negotiation, Sexual Tension, Slightly Aged-Up (16-19 and 18-21), Snuggling, Sometimes Intentionally Sometimes Not, Suggestive Themes, lukadrien, lukadrienette, protective luka
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-07
Updated: 2020-05-08
Packaged: 2020-10-11 16:00:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 27
Words: 94,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20548820
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mikauzoran/pseuds/Mikauzoran
Summary: Temptation...comfort...desire...affection...support...love.A collection of Lukadrien drabbles wherein Luka and Adrien flirt, pine, talk, take care of one another, tease, laugh, cry, dance around each other, and sometimes give in.





	1. Why is My Finger in Your Mouth? or What’s Your Excuse?

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone! Thank you so much for joining me. I'm Mikau, and this is where I'm putting all of my short, random Lukadrien nonsense. I hope you enjoy it. Thanks for reading!
> 
> Quick Notes: They're eighteen and a half and just shy of twenty-one in this one. Also, Chanson means "song" in French. The title is, of course, from Mozart.
> 
> My Tumblr: https://mikauzoran.tumblr.com/

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "The Ice Cream/Finger Incident" (as they shall hereafter refer to it) leaves Luka and Marinette bothered. Adrien escapes merely with embarrassment.

Marinette frowned. “Where?”

“Over there, by the statue.” Luka pointed.

“Hey!” Adrien whimpered as Luka’s finger grazed his ice cream cone. “That’s mine!”

“Oh, sorry, Adrien. I wasn’t—” Luka abruptly broke off as Adrien seized his wrist and took Luka’s finger into his mouth, wrapping his tongue around the digit to clean it of the blue raspberry ice cream remnants.

Luka felt his body temperature shoot up like a bamboo stalk as he tried not to catalogue the heat and dampness of Adrien’s mouth, the soft-rough texture of Adrien’s tongue, the gentle brush of the back of Adrien’s teeth.

It was a losing battle.

Adrien froze, eyes going wide as he realized what he was doing. Slowly, he pulled Luka’s finger out of his mouth with a wet pop. “S-Sorry. I didn’t mean… Reflexes,” Adrien tried to explain, grasping at wisps of clouds, attempting to salvage the situation.

Luka cleared his throat. “You don’t—uh—I forget that you don’t get ice cream often, do you?”

Adrien shook his head, tentatively peeking up to meet Luka’s eyes.

Luka’s face was blazing red, but an encouraging, indulgent smile clung to his lips. “…Want a bite of mine?”

Adrien bit his lip, head tipping to the side uncertainly. “For real?”

Luka nodded, holding out his own cone.

Adrien leaned in and took a tentative lick. He pulled back with a sheepish smile. “Thank you. Sorry for being so weird.”

Luka waved away his apology. “Don’t worry about it. You’re cute. …Shall we?” He nodded towards where the rest of the gang was waiting (gawking) by the Ladybug and Chat Noir statue.

Adrien nodded, trying to avoid meeting Nino’s troubled gaze as he made his way over to the group.

Luka looked back to Marinette. “Coming, Chanson?”

Marinette made a spluttering sound accompanied by a wounded fluttering of hands. She put a palm over her mouth and nodded as she attempted to recover from the scene she had just witnessed. Why did the two boys she had feelings for have to be so cute _together_?

Luka frowned in concern. “Are you okay? Your face is really red.”

“Well, so is yours!” Marinette meeped, dashing off to join the others so as to avoid further scrutiny.

Luka blinked as he watched her go. He knew exactly why _his_ face was flushed. What excuse did Marinette have?


	2. (Don't) Let Me Go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Luka finally gets why Adrien always asks him to show him where the same note is.  
Adrien finally gets what he needs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again! Thank you for deciding to come back for the second installment of Nachtmusik, and thanks so much to everyone who left comments and kudos and bookmarked the story. I was so pleased to see that people were interested.
> 
> This one isn't on Tumblr yet. I kind of forgot the meaning of the word "drabble" with this, I feel, but it's still pretty short, right? Right. ^.^;
> 
> For those of you keeping score, this one takes place when Adrien is sixteen and Luka is eighteen in June (Phantasmagoria takes place at the end of March. No, you don't have to read any of my other works to read this; they just all take place in the same swirling, nebulous universe in my head. They all stand alone just fine).
> 
> Enjoy!

Adrien sighed as he sat on Luka’s bed, quietly strumming the [acoustic guitar arrangement of This is Gospel](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c_eKw6eF1YQ) by Panic! At the Disco that Luka had shown him several weeks before. He got to “the fear, the fear of” and stopped, his mind going blank at “falling apart”.

Luka looked up from where he sat at his desk working on his term paper: a comparative analysis of Maxim Gorky’s play [The Lower Depths](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Lower_Depths), the 1936 French film version of the same name by Jean Renoir, and the 1957 Japanese film version, Donzoko, directed by Kurosawa Akira.

“You okay, Angel?”

“Sorry.” Adrien conjured up a brittle imitation of a smile. “Just got lost in my own head for a second there.” He looked back down at his fingers, not really seeing them. “Um…Sorry. Where’s F again?” He smiled sheepishly, falling back on the now three-month-old inside joke in an attempt to cover up how raw he was feeling.

Luka got up and gently positioned Adrien’s hand.

The contact was brief but just enough to ground Adrien with its warmth and certainty when Adrien felt numb and lost.

“Thanks,” Adrien whispered, starting the song over.

Luka stood looking down at Adrien, studying him for a minute, as he played distractedly. “…Do you want to talk about it?”

Adrien’s fingers tripped over one another. “W-What? Sorry. What do you mean?”

Luka frowned as Adrien played dumb. “Sorry to pry,” Luka led in. “You just seem…off. Sad…. In pain. I was wondering if you wanted to talk about the reason behind that. You don’t have to, but I’m here if you want to.”

Adrien shook his head. “No. It’s nothing. I’m just being a little overly sensitive. It’s not a big deal.” He looked back down at the guitar, his vision swimming. “Uh…sorry. Where was F again?”

Luka took Adrien’s hand and moved it back into place.

Adrien felt like he could breathe again.

“I just want you to know that I’m always here, Perfect Fifth. You don’t ever have to do anything with that knowledge if you don’t want to. I just want you to have it on hand in case you do want someone to lend an ear.”

Adrien nodded, skipping ahead to the second verse. “Thank you, Orpheus.”

“_Any_ time,” Luka stressed, giving Adrien’s hair a ruffle before going back to his desk to resume work on his paper.

Adrien gave up on This is Gospel and tried his hand at a few melodies from The Legend of Zelda series as well as the Mario franchise. They all blurred into one another. The notes were like paint running together to create an unflattering, musical muddy-brown color.

Adrien stopped playing and just stared down at the frets, mentally counting them over and over again in an attempt to ground his mind. He kept losing track around seven.

The bed shifted as Luka sat down beside him.

Adrien’s gaze jerked up. “S-Sorry. Am I bothering you?”

Luka shook his head. “Never, P5. You just look like you need someone to sit with you, even if you don’t want to talk.”

Guilt hit Adrien like a breaking wave battering the base of a craggy cliff. “I didn’t mean to disturb you. I’m sorry. I know you’re working on your paper. If I’m distracting you, I should just go ho—”

Adrien’s voice broke on the word, a stabbing pain exploding in his chest.

Luka frowned, eyes searching Adrien’s. “You don’t have to go anywhere. I’m almost done with the paper, and the deadline isn’t for another week. I have time for you.”

_“Unlike some people in your life,”_ Luka thought begrudgingly.

Luka sighed, muttering. “What did he do or say to you this time? Or was it Ladybug?”

It never ceased to amaze Luka all the varied ways in which those two could emotionally and mentally wear Adrien down.

Adrien flinched, pointedly looking away. “She didn’t…I don’t…My father wasn’t…”

_Both_ of them, then. No wonder Adrien was such a mess.

“Shhh,” Luka comforted, resting a hand on Adrien’s shoulder. “You don’t have to talk about it. I was just…I’m sorry. I’ll keep the sarcastic commentary in my head.”

He gave Adrien’s back a pat and then let his hand slide off of Adrien’s arm.

The arm felt the poorer and colder for it.

They sat in silence for a few minutes before Luka broke into Adrien’s thought-maelstrom once more. “Is there anything I can do? Anything at all?”

Adrien smiled plastically, trying to project an air of levity. “Could you show me where F is again?”

Luka’s brow furrowed.

Usually, Adrien only put that joke into play twice of an evening. They were over their limit.

Still. Luka dutifully took Adrien’s trembling hand…and froze. He let go.

Adrien’s face spasmed in momentary panic until Luka changed the angle of his wrist to thread his fingers through Adrien’s.

Adrien’s heart fluttered, relief flooding over him at the touch.

Luka squeezed gently, whispering, “I finally got the joke. I’m ashamed it took me three months. I’m sorry.”

“W-What?” Adrien studied Luka’s expression nervously.

Luka looked up, meeting Adrien’s gaze with a sad look. “I always wondered why you asked about the finger placement for F. Every time, I just went with it, kind of accepting that it was one of our things…but it was never about the note. It never had anything to do with finding the note…and I knew that. I knew you didn’t _need_ me to show you, but what I didn’t realize was…”

Adrien’s eyes widened, and he tried to pull back his hand.

Luka held fast, giving Adrien a heartbreaking smile. “…in order to show you the note, I had to take your hand. The thing you wanted was the contact. You ask about F when you want someone to touch you.”

Adrien’s face flushed in shame at being found out. “Sorry. I—”

“—Adrien,” Luka cut him off. “You can ask for whatever you need at any time.”

It was obvious that Adrien still didn’t believe him, even after three months of trying to drill the concept into Adrien’s head.

“I don’t mind,” Luka stressed. “I _don’t_. I want to give you whatever you need. I _want_ you to need me. I _want_ to help however you need me to help.”

Adrien shook his head slowly. “I don’t understand.”

“You don’t have to understand to accept my affection….” Luka pursed his lips, debating before diving in head first. “May I hold you?”

Adrien gave a start. “I—What?”

“May I hold you?” Luka repeated.

Tentatively, Adrien nodded.

Luka gently took the guitar and set it aside. He scooted to the top of the bed and carefully pulled Adrien down into his arms on top of him.

Adrien stiffened at first.

“Is this okay?” Luka wondered, chewing nervously on his bottom lip, questioning whether he’d gone too far.

“Mn,” Adrien hummed contentedly, relaxing as he stopped fighting the warmth and comfort and relief welling up inside himself and just sank into Luka’s protective hold.

He stopped worrying about being needy and overstepping boundaries and taking advantage of Luka’s kind, giving nature and just let himself melt into solidity, security, and the smell of pine.

Luka slowly began to run his hand up and down Adrien’s back.

The trials of the day and Adrien’s other relationships sloughed off as he buried his face in Luka’s neck.

Encouraged by the positive reaction, Luka began to massage Adrien’s scalp gently, eliciting a rumbly purr.

Luka chuckled, making sure to get really well behind Adrien’s ears.

The purr only got stronger until, twenty minutes later, Adrien drifted off to sleep.

Rationalizing that a cat nap never hurt anyone, Luka joined him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys. I finally realized that I can include links within the text! This is awesome! Does that make it easier than just including links to references at the end? I figure this way you can look things up and listen to things as you go instead of having to scroll down to the end and then decide it's not worth it. ^.^;
> 
> Regarding the subject of Luka's paper: I've decided that he's studying music and Russian literature in uni, so that's why that paper topic. I haven't seen the entirety of Gorky's play The Lower Depths, but I saw both the French and Japanese film versions. The French one was a lot of fun and less sad (it was funny, even). Kurosawa's Donzoko sticks closely to the original, but there are some really great scenes that are purely Japanese culture, and it's quite brilliant. You should see if you can find them online or through your local library.
> 
> But I hope you enjoyed this. I'm rather fond of it.
> 
> Thanks for reading!
> 
> References:  
This is Gospel (Guitar): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c_eKw6eF1YQ  
This is Gospel (Original): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=crwE3Tw_k0Q  
Gorky’s The Lower Depths: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Lower_Depths


	3. Unresolved Sexual Tension The Opera

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How is that any different from what we normally do?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! Super short drabble today. This is one of the ones that was already on Tumblr.
> 
> Score card: This takes place during the Jabberwocky/Daisy timeline. Adrien is eighteen and a half; Luka is almost twenty-one. (I finished the draft of the first chapter of Jabberwocky, so that should be up on Friday 09/13/2019 as planned.)
> 
> Enjoy!

Adrien leaned forward on the counter and smiled innocently at Luka. “Would you like to come sit in the dark with me for four hours of unresolved sexual tension?”

Nino spit out his chai tea, hacked, and spluttered, “The _hell_, Mec?!”

Luka didn’t think that sounded any different than any other evening spent with Adrien lately. “Sure,” he answered with a shrug. “What flavor of unresolved sexual tension, precisely?”

“Wagner’s [Tristan and Isolde](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tristan_und_Isolde).” Adrien flashed Luka a grin and two tickets. “I got box seats. I figured you’d say yes.”

“Don’t I always say yes to you, Angel?” Luka smiled through his chagrin, mentally laughing at himself for what all he put himself through for this boy.


	4. The more things stay the same...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well. That went from zero to sixty on the friendship to lust spectrum pretty quickly.  
Also, tattoos.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! I hope this update finds you well. On Monday my team got slammed with another rush project where we have to review and analyze, like, one hundred and thirty of our cases and send National Coordinating Counsel the reports by close of business on Thursday, so...yeah, life isn't fun right now. I'm glad I already have Chapter One of Jabberwocky done for Friday (I just need to find time to do my final edit).
> 
> But, anyway! Thanks for joining me today. As you can see, I have already lost sight of the concept of "drabble". Have fun reading this almost-three-thousand-word chapter. It takes place in July, four months after Phantasmagoria. Adrien is sixteen; Luka is eighteen and a half.

“My father would kill me if I got a tattoo,” Adrien sighed, twirling a pen between his fingers as he leaned in to get a better look at the simple reference doodles Luka had drawn.

“You’d have to get it somewhere no one would see,” Luka hummed, going over the runes beneath the leftmost raven to thicken the lines.

Adrien scoffed. “Luka, I’m a model. My body is public property. There _is_ no ‘somewhere no one would see’.”

Luka looked up and frowned. “Your body is yours…and whoever you decide to share it with’s…not public property.”

Adrien set the pen down on the counter and put his hands up in surrender. “Aren’t you getting discouraged yet?” he wondered.

“How so?” Luka went back to the doodle of the ravens.

“Trying to teach me self-worth,” Adrien explained. “Isn’t it frustrating having to repeat the same things over and over?”

“Not particularly.” Luka shrugged. “I mean, you’re only the way you are now because some people—who shall remain unnamed yet obvious—have been telling you you’re worthless and undesirable for years. Realistically, I figure it’s going to take me a solid two or three years of constant fussing and lavishing of praise and affection to get you back up somewhere close to normal. Why would I be frustrated after only four months?”

Adrien didn’t reply.

Luka looked up, an eyebrow quirking.

Adrien stared. “Are you serious?”

Luka’s brow pulled together into a frown. “It…probably is going to take longer than two or three years, honestly…but I’ve got time.” Luka’s eyes flicked back down to the doodles on the back of the flyer announcing a Greek music festival that weekend.

Adrien continued to stare, wondering what he had done in a former life to deserve this man’s friendship and devotion.

“…You could get a tattoo on your stomach,” Luka broke the silence after a minute or two had passed without words.

Adrien rubbed his stomach just above his bellybutton. “I pose shirtless or with my shirt unbuttoned sometimes. I think they’d see it.”

Luka snickered, looking up to surreptitiously wink. “I was thinking…lower, Angel.”

Adrien frowned, looked down, and then burst into laughter. “Geez. What kind of tattoo would I get on my pelvis?”

Luka shrugged, self-satisfaction still clinging to his lips. “What kind of tattoo would you get anywhere else?”

Adrien bit his lip. “Haven’t really thought about it.”

“How about a snake?” Luka offered.

Adrien smiled incredulously. “On my lower abdomen? Isn’t that kind of…I don’t know…suggestive?”

“I think the only people who would see it would be in a _suggestive_ mood anyway,” Luka reasoned.

Adrien covered his face with his hands, shoulders trembling with laughter as he shook his head. “I think I’m too pure to be having this conversation.”

Luka rolled his eyes. “Please. Says the guy who has made suggestive jokes at my expense on numerous occasions.”

Adrien removed his hands from his eyes to playfully slap at Luka’s arm. He glanced furtively towards the stairwell to the upper deck. “What if your mom or sisters walk in?”

Luka snorted unconcernedly. “Juleka would gang up on whomever she most felt like seeing blush at that moment, Rose would go into hysterics over how we’re supposedly a couple now, and Maman would tell me to make sure my box of condoms isn’t expired and remind me how long it’s been since I last had need of them.”

“My father would…I don’t even know,” Adrien sighed. “Have a heart attack? He wouldn’t be supportive of me having a physical relationship with anyone like your mom is.”

“I kind of wish she was less supportive,” Luka grumbled. “She thinks it’s strange that I don’t have any interest in sleeping with people until I feel a really strong connection with them. She thinks I should experiment more.”

“I wonder why, if you’re happy the way you are,” Adrien hummed.

Luka shook his head, going back to tracing the runes on the doodle. “She comes from an era of free love, so it’s weird for her that I would only want one partner in a long-term, committed relationship…. Like…even though she was with our father for a long time, I’m not actually certain that Juleka and I have the same biological father. We look pretty different, and…Maman and my father’s eyes are both blue…but Juleka’s are brown. Genetically, that’s…”

Adrien drew in a slow, deep breath.

“…Part of me feels like they shouldn’t teach kids about genetics and Punnett squares until they’re old enough to deal with the reality that they’re adopted or their siblings aren’t full-blooded siblings,” Luka snorted. “…But we were talking about tattoos.”

Adrien nodded. “_You_ should get the snake tattoo on your pelvis. You could pull it off.”

Luka grinned at the flattery. “You think?”

“It fits your image.”

“Because I was seriously considering it,” Luka informed.

“Were you really?” Adrien leaned in closer, picking up his pen once more and twirling it between his fingers. “What kind of snake? A cobra like Sass?”

Luka shook his head. “Something more stylized, more Zen, less threatening. Maybe a sleeping snake coiled up. Maybe a Chinese calligraphy-style snake.”

Adrien nodded in encouragement. “That would be kind of cool. I’d like to see that!”

Luka blushed. “I’m giving you the opportunity to remember the placement of the tattoo and adjust your enthusiasm.”

Adrien grimaced. “Pretend I made some kind of flirty, teasing comment to save face that made you feel slightly flattered but also a little uncomfortable.”

Luka gave him a thumbs up. “I actually think it would be cool to get an entire Chinese zodiac…plus a cat.”

Adrien’s face lit up. “Like Fruits Basket!”

Luka’s eye twitched as Adrien completely missed the implication. “Uh…what’s that?”

Adrien’s brow scrunched into an unimpressed frown. “You’ve never heard of Fruits Basket? It’s an anime…and a manga, but you have to see it. It’s one of the classics!” Adrien insisted adamantly. “I’ll have to show you. Marinette and I have been getting together for take away Chinese food and anime on Saturdays the past few months. We’re almost done with the anime we’re watching now, and, after that, we’re going to have to have you over to show you Furuba.”

Luka tried not to let the conflicting emotions show on his face. “That sounds like a lot of fun, but I don’t think Marinette would appreciate me intruding.”

Adrien rolled his eyes. “Marinette wouldn’t mind. She _loves_ having you around. It would be fun, all three of us together.”

“Yeah,” Luka sighed, imagining an alternate reality where both Marinette and Adrien were ecstatic to have him around for all of the reasons he wanted them to be. “But it sounds like anime and Chinese is _your_ thing—just the two of you. _You_ would feel kind of off if Marinette started coming to our jam sessions or family meals, wouldn’t you?”

Adrien shifted awkwardly on the kitchen stool, his nose crinkling. “…That’s different.”

“Maybe it’s not to her,” Luka suggested kindly. “I’ll tell you what, you and I can watch that anime together, just the two of us. How does that sound?”

Adrien’s smile came back, and he nodded. “Deal…. So…tattoos?”

Luka grinned, motioning down at the doodles. “I don’t want a sleeve or anything too big or noticeable. Just some little decorative tattoos here and there that can be hidden easily.”

Adrien switched hands so that he was twirling the pen in his right, freeing up his left hand to point. “I love the concept of Odin’s ravens on your shoulder blades…and a snake around your wrist under your usual bracelet is _too_ funny.”

“I’m also thinking about getting a little pawprint on my finger where I usually wear my ring,” Luka announced tentatively, awaiting Adrien’s reaction.

“A pawprint?” Adrien’s head slowly tipped to the side. “Why a pawprint?”

Luka fought not to show his chagrin. “You know,” he replied conversationally. “like Chat Noir.”

Adrien’s eyes widened, and his face took on an amazed gleam. “Really?”

“Of course,” Luka replied smoothly, inwardly steeling himself. “I _am_ his biggest fan after all…both in and out of the mask.”

Adrien let out one of those dazzling, marble machine laughs, hitting a jerky collection of pitches that somehow managed to sound just perfect to Luka.

“You’d have to fight off hordes of fangirls for that title,” Adrien cautioned.

Luka shrugged. “I’d take them…and I would win.”

“You’re wasted on Chat Noir and whoever he is behind that mask,” Adrien replied in awe, a wide grin spreading from one corner of his mouth to the other. “He could never appreciate you the way you deserve. He’s too full of himself.”

Luka shook his head. “I’ve met Chat Noir. He may come off as a flirty goofball in public, but in private he’s sweet and considerate.”

“Wow,” Adrien chuckled. “If you like him so much, you should marry him. I’m sure you two would make adorable kittens together.”

Luka’s entire face went burgundy as he burst out laughing. “Oh my God,” he gasped, burying his face in his hands.

“As for me, Viperion is much better,” Adrien continued, smirking in triumph as Luka continued to laugh convulsively in a mix of misery, disbelief, and genuine amusement.

“Seriously,” Adrien pretended to pout. “He’s all mysterious and suave and sexy. I’d like to see him in a suit…. Though…Chat Noir _is_ pretty hot. I mean, his butt…”

“Perfection,” Luka snickered.

“Exactly,” Adrien emphatically agreed. “…Do you think Viperion would think I was a slut if I wanted to have occasional threesomes with you and Chat Noir?”

Luka looked up from where his head rested on the countertop. He wiped a tear from his eye and wondered, “How did this become a thing?”

“What?” Adrien hummed, satisfied with his work. “The whole pretending to be gay for Chat Noir and Viperion thing? Remember when Rose got us to play Kill, Screw, Marry last month, and I said I would kill Chat Noir, screw Ladybug, and marry Viperion? And then you said you would kill Ladybug, screw Chat Noir, and marry me? And then Juleka made a joke about foursomes. And then I observed that it seemed like the best of friends always made jokes about sleeping with one another? Like Marinette and Alya and Nino and me, so…it seemed like a logical leap to start doing that with you?” Adrien frowned as a thought occurred to him. “…But is it weird because you’re bi? I know a lot of friends joke about being gay for one another, but…is this insulting? If so, I’m really sorry,” he backpedaled hard. “I’m still kind of new to this whole ‘acceptable casual social etiquette’ thing. Tell me if I cross a line. _Please_. I don’t want to screw this up.”

Luka straightened and shook his head. “You’re okay. I don’t mind your flirting and teasing. I know you’re a flirty person to start with and that it’s not just me. I don’t have any delusions about that. I mean, I’ve seen you and Nino. You and Nino need to get a room and work out some of the sexual tension between you two sometime. Put the poor man out of his misery, Angel.”

Adrien rolled his eyes. “I think Alya is doing a fine job. She doesn’t need my help…but _we’re_ okay?” He eyed Luka anxiously.

Luka nodded. “I know you’re just joking. No offence taken.”

“Good,” Adrien sighed in relief. “…So…tattoos?”

The side of Luka’s mouth rose in a fond smile. “I think I’m going to get the pawprint tattoo on my finger. Do you think this looks accurate?” He indicated the doodle below Munin the raven.

Adrien frowned, pulling the paper in closer.

“I mean, I’m always distracted when I’m around Chat Noir, so I haven’t paid very close attention to what the pawprint on the ring looks like,” Luka explained.

“Distracted?” Adrien hummed, peeking up mischievously. “By his butt?”

Luka had mostly meant the _akuma_, but…

Luka bumped Adrien’s shoulder and replied a little too genuinely, too tenderly, “By his eyes. I’m a sucker for his eyes.”

Adrien’s heart jumped. “…Mine are prettier.”

“Jealous, Angel?” Luka snickered.

_“Confused,”_ Adrien thought.

Confused because he kind of wanted Luka to be serious. Sometimes, Luka would say something painfully sweet, and Adrien’s heart would ache for Luka’s words to be true. And that was extremely confusing because Adrien wasn’t interested in guys. At least…he had never been interested in guys before. It had only ever been Ladybug, but…sometimes Luka confused him.

“Super jealous,” Adrien snorted.

“Don’t be. He’s not interested in me, so I’m all yours, Angel,” Luka chuckled at his own expense.

“Don’t you forget it,” Adrien clicked his tongue, switching the ink pen to his left hand to draw. “The pawprint is more like this.”

Luka nodded, impressed by the likeness. “…How is it that you have such an intimate knowledge of Chat Noir’s ring?”

Adrien looked up and answered with a straight face, “Oh? Didn’t I tell you? I’m sleeping with him.”

“Oh?” Luka snickered. “Be a friend and get me his number, would you?”

“I don’t think I want to share,” Adrien pouted.

“Share which one of us?” Luka arched an eyebrow.

Adrien smirked, twirling the ink pen playfully. “Either.”

Luka rolled his eyes. “In all seriousness—”

The pen went flying from Adrien’s hand, landing over by the wraparound couch.

“Oops.” Adrien smiled sheepishly. He hopped down from the stool into a feline crouch, scooped up the pen, and slowly rolled up, his posterior leading.

Luka’s brain blew a fuse. He knew he shouldn’t, but he couldn’t help watching. It had happened so fast, and now he couldn’t keep from staring. He was already a little riled up from all the suggestive flirting, and now…ngeh. His mind was in the gutter.

Did Adrien know what he was doing? He couldn’t. He couldn’t have any idea. Even if he did, he _wouldn’t_. Adrien may have been a flirt, but he wasn’t a tease. He would never.

Adrien turned back around, and Luka scrambled to put a lid on all thoughts of Adrien’s butt and Adrien naked and sinking his teeth into the flesh of Adrien’s hip until he left a mark and Adrien’s laugh and Adrien’s eyes and how bad he wanted this guy. Because Adrien had no idea, and it was an abuse of Adrien’s trust to be sitting there staring and having those kinds of thoughts when Adrien was under the belief that their flirting was only all in good fun.

“Sorry. What were you saying?” Adrien smiled innocently as he sat back down on the stool next to Luka.

Luka shifted uncomfortably, mentally cursing his preference for wearing skinny jeans that were too tight to begin with.

Belatedly, he realized that Adrien had asked him a question. “Um… Was I talking?”

Adrien nodded, waiting expectantly.

Luka gulped, trying to discretely regulate his breathing. “Uh…I forget.”

Adrien shrugged, not suspecting. “Well, just let me know if you remember.”

“S-Sure,” Luka replied thickly, shrugging off his overshirt because suddenly the main cabin was sweltering.

And then Adrien took hold of his hand.

The touch felt like a hot iron on Luka’s unexpectedly hypersensitive skin.

“May I?” Adrien inquired, motioning to take Luka’s ring off.

Luka nodded, not trusting his voice.

With the retrieved ink pen, Adrien carefully traced the pawprint onto Luka’s flesh, blowing on it to help it dry before slipping the ring back over it.

Internally, Luka was panting. The contact, the way Adrien bit his bottom lip in concentration, the way he puckered his lips to blow the ink dry…simultaneously too much and yet not enough. He almost whimpered when Adrien withdrew his hands.

“Done,” Adrien announced proudly.

Luka pulled the ring back off carefully to inspect Adrien’s work and immediately came to a decision: he was going that very evening to get that pawprint permanently tattooed onto his skin before the ink had a chance to smudge or wash off.

“I love it,” Luka breathed. “It’s perfect.”

“Glad to hear it,” Adrien chuckled, obviously pleased with himself.

Luka caught Adrien’s right hand. “Would you be comfortable with moving your ring to a different finger for a second?”

Adrien nodded, slipping his ring off and sliding it onto the ring finger of his left hand.

Luka picked up his own pen and made two little dots on the finger, reminiscent of puncture wounds. “Done,” he announced.

Adrien frowned, inspecting his “tattoo”. “Bite mark?” he questioned.

“Snake bite.” Luka winked.

Adrien tittered in amusement. “Oh no! Aren’t viper bites lethal? You’d better suck the venom out before I die!”

“Drama queen,” Luka snorted even as he grinned.

“Seriously!” Adrien insisted, hamming it up as he held out his hand. “Quick! I’m already feeling woozy!”

Luka took Adrien’s hand and delicately brought it to his lips for a feather-light kiss.

Adrien’s heartbeat tripped. His stomach fluttered. His breath caught.

Luka looked up, his eyes meeting Adrien’s as the most perfect blush skated over Adrien’s cheeks, highlighting the dazed look in Adrien’s eyes as his pupils widened.

Luka’s breath hitched.

At the same moment, a thought occurred to both boys: _“Shoot. I’m in serious trouble.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NOW WITH FANART (Thanks, Buggy!): https://pawsomelybuggy.tumblr.com/post/187943781939/mikauzoran-pawsomelybuggy-aah-this-is-from
> 
> Okay. So please tell me that other people's friend groups joke with each other about sleeping together or being couples or flirt heavily with one another. In high school, members of my friend group were like that. In uni too. Hopefully other people flirt with and joke about being interested in their friends, otherwise this chapter is weirder than I intended it to be. ^.^;
> 
> This is actually based on a written sketch I did on Tumblr ("You Know Exactly What You're Doing": https://mikauzoran.tumblr.com/post/187523750953/lukadrien-drabble-you-know-exactly-what-youre). Those of you who have already read that sketch will know what the next chapter is. It will be the second half of the word-sketch.
> 
> But thoughts? Opinions? Questions? Did you like it? Too much suggestive flirting? It kind of snowballed fast, didn't it? I hadn't intended it to be so long. Thoughts about Luka's tattoo ideas? Favourite line? Least favourite part?
> 
> Thank you for reading guys!
> 
> Question: When should Luka's birthday be? October or November? (I've already unilaterally decided that Adrien's birthday is April thirtieth.) Luka's birthday will probably come up in Jabberwocky, so I kind of want to pin down a date, but I can't decide: October or November?
> 
> References:  
Odin's Ravens Hugin and Munin: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Huginn_and_Muninn  
Wintergatan Marble Machine: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wintergatan


	5. ...the more they change.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A snake and a cat meet in a bar...  
Cards on the table.  
Mutual confusion and overt sexual tension.  
Temptation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! Thanks for your patience. I know the updating schedule on this thing isn't regular. The second chapter of Jabberwocky will be out tomorrow, though. Thank you as well for reading and commenting and bookmarking and leaving kudos. I'm really thrilled that this collection has had such a warm reception.
> 
> Honestly, I was debating whether to publish this one. It's been sitting on my computer for a few days, but there are a couple things in here that I think will make people cock their heads in confusion, so feel free to ask questions, guys. This takes place during Jabberwocky when Adrien is eighteen and a half and Luka is just short of twenty-one. It takes place in August, two months after Chapter Twenty-Six: Boy of There's a Daisy. I haven't decided if this is canon to Jabberwocky yet, so take it with a grain of salt. It may end up being a "deleted scene" to Jabberwocky. I was just trying to make the second part to that written sketch I did on Tumblr ("You Know Exactly What You're Doing": https://mikauzoran.tumblr.com/post/187523750953/lukadrien-drabble-you-know-exactly-what-youre), but then...things got complex. ^.^;
> 
> Also...drabble? Never heard of it. What's a drabble?
> 
> I hope you enjoy it!

Luka blinked.

Was that…? It was. Adrien Agreste at the bar with his back to the stage, chatting with Raoul the bartender.

Adrien Agreste wearing black leather pants with buckles up the thighs.

A primal shudder darted up Luka’s spine as Adrien shifted his weight.

He had _such_ a nice—

_“—You have a girlfriend,”_ Luka’s shoulder angel reminded him.

Luka looked over to where Marinette was laughing at something Mylène had said.

_“A girlfriend who’s only dating you as a rebound because things with Adrien exploded,”_ Luka’s shoulder devil weighed in, having a less-than-positive effect on Luka’s self-esteem.

Objectively, Luka knew he should finish packing up his stuff and go sit with his girlfriend while the other bands played. He knew that increasing his proximity to Adrien wearing those pants was just asking for trouble, but…

Whereas Marinette would say something encouraging like, “You guys were wonderful! I really liked that third song. It was super intense”, _Adrien_ would look at Luka in awe and breathe, “Did you write that third song? It was amazing! I loved the tension you built using those tritones. I could _feel_ it mounting in my chest”.

Luka appreciated Marinette, he really did, but…he felt _appreciated_ _by_ Adrien, and he was really more in the mood for Adrien-style praise that evening. Pushing his reservations aside, Luka made his way over to his personal siren.

“Here he comes,” Raoul whispered to Adrien.

Adrien sucked in an anxious breath. “How do I look?”

Raoul snickered despite himself. “You’re golden, Dollface. He’s been staring at you the past two minutes trying to make up his mind to come over here, and now he’s taking the bait. All you have to do is reel him in.”

Adrien blew out a sigh of relief.

Raoul frowned. “Why did you two ever break up in the first place? You were disgustingly adorable two years ago.”

Adrien debated correcting Raoul’s assumption but eventually decided that it wasn’t worth it. “My father,” Adrien sighed. “He found out and made threats, and it was really ugly. I was scared, so I didn’t stick it out, and I didn’t put up a fight like Luka wanted to…. I was weak, and I…I was a stupid kid who didn’t realize he already had everything he’d always wanted.”

Raoul chuckled softly, a deep rumble like thunder rolling over the mountains. “Just do better this time.” He waved at Luka over Adrien’s shoulder and turned to go.

“Hey, Ariel.” Luka wore a besotted grin as he came up next to Adrien. He shoved his hands into his own back pockets so that he wouldn’t be tempted to try to put them into Adrien’s. “I didn’t know you’d be here tonight. Thanks for coming.”

“Hey, Orpheus,” Adrien greeted warmly, slowly turning to give Luka his most inviting smile.

In spite of his best intentions, Luka took note of Adrien’s lip gloss shimmering in the atmospheric, low light of the bar and absentmindedly wondered what Adrien’s smile tasted like.

“The photoshoot let out in time, so I thought I’d drop by,” Adrien was saying, angling his body towards Luka’s and stepping in a little closer, presumably to be heard over the din of the next band taking the stage. “I’m glad I did because tonight was spectacular. I can really tell which songs you wrote.” His voice dropped into a purr. “The third song tonight was genius. I loved the way you used the unresolved [tritones](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JJIO-Jr0E8o) to ratchet up the intensity. It reminded me of Mahler’s [Ninth Symphony](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Symphony_No._9_\(Mahler\)) when he musically depicted his own impending [heart attack](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ah3mcaRpc9Q). Your song gave me chills.”

Luka grinned, bruised self-esteem making a comeback with a little attention from Adrien. Why couldn’t Marinette say things like that?

_“It’s not her fault she doesn’t have the musical vocabulary to stroke your ego. She says plenty of nice things about you and your work,”_ the shoulder angel reasoned.

“Well, I can’t deny my indebtedness to Mahler,” Luka admitted, “but I’m glad you found my approach enjoyable.”

Adrien rolled his eyes. “Don’t be so humble. We’re all musically indebted to Mozart and Beethoven and Berlioz and Debussy. What’s important is what you do with your musical inheritance, and you just slipped classically-inspired musical themes into a rock song. I bow down to your creativity and knack for innovation.” Adrien dipped into a dramatic bow.

Luka laughed, taking his hands out of his pockets to pull Adrien back up. “Oh, please. Stop. You’re going to make me conceited.”

“You have every right to be,” Adrien insisted, hand coming to rest on Luka’s upper arm and squeezing gently. “You’re amazing.”

The breathless way Adrien said it stole the air from Luka’s lungs.

Luka gulped as his eyes locked with Adrien’s. “Yeah?”

When had they gotten so close?

Adrien ran his tongue over his bottom lip. “Yeah.” His right hand came to rest on Luka’s hip, and his thumb started to stroke rhythmically, hypnotically.

“Hey,” Adrien breathed.

“Hm?” Luka answered distractedly.

“You’re done for the night, right? Wanna go somewhere else?” Adrien tempted. “Maybe take a walk…head back to your place…jam a little…. It’s been forever since we last had a sleepover.”

Luka’s mind fell down a flight of stairs.

That…sounded exactly like what Luka wanted to do. It would be just like before, before they’d been torn apart…. Only, it wouldn’t. Whereas the flirting and the tension between them had been innocent and subtle and beneath the surface two years prior, this, now—with Adrien’s thumb stroking Luka’s hip and the look in Adrien’s eyes and the leather pants clinging to Adrien’s skin—this was not subtle or innocent. This was overt, surface-level sexual tension. 

Adrien was no longer oblivious to the attraction between them. He was no longer questioning his sexuality or unsure of himself. Adrien was seducing him. On purpose. Adrien was picking him up. Adrien was asking to spend the night.

Mentally, Luka let out a string of curses. Two years ago, Luka would have seriously considered killing for this moment. Now? He didn’t know what to do with it. Was this a whim of Adrien’s or something lasting? Things had blown up between Adrien and Marinette…whom they were both in love with. Adrien had told Luka the details, told him how he was a mess emotionally, told him about the ups and downs of the year he’d been having mental health-wise. Was Adrien’s attraction to Luka any different than Marinette’s? Was Adrien using him too?

Luka took a step back.

Adrien’s eyes widened. His head tipped to the side questioningly.

Luka shook his head.

He couldn’t do this. He couldn’t do this to himself. He had to set up boundaries and protect his heart from those two. He had to preserve the friendships in hopes that someday either the man or the woman he loved would be emotionally healthy enough for a real relationship with him.

“I can’t,” Luka replied with an easy smile that cost him an incredible amount of energy to maintain. “Not tonight. Maybe some other day. Tonight, Marinette and the gang are here, and I’m supposed to be hanging out with them. I have to walk Marinette home.”

Disappointment was evident on Adrien’s face. “Oh. Okay.”

“Some other day, Ariel,” Luka assured, using the nickname to remind himself of the danger of the temptation.

Adrien nodded, fiddling with his ring. “So, I guess you have to go then? Or can I buy you a drink and gush about how talented you are a little?”

Luka bit his lip. Tempting, tempting, tempting. “Why don’t you come join us?” he suggested, knowing he would be sure to behave in front of the others.

“Who’s here?” Adrien craned his neck, looking for his acquaintances.

“Over there.” Luka pointed.

Adrien frowned, mentally sizing up the assembly: Juleka (actively opposed to Adrien getting close to Luka again), Mylène (skeptical of Adrien after the events of the year), Rose (an ally), Ivan (indifferent to the conflict but likely to side with Mylène), Alya (would kill him if she knew what was going on in his head), Marinette (…), Nino (compromised, caught in the middle). Not the most friendly crowd, and he would have to watch Marinette and Luka being couple-y together.

Adrien wasn’t sure what would be worse: watching Marinette fawn over Luka or watching Luka melt for Marinette. Both prospects sounded…honestly, like torture. It had been almost two months since Adrien had learned that they were dating, but…losing them to one another hadn’t gotten any easier, especially since he had started to understand his feelings for Luka.

“I don’t think I want to intrude on group date night.” Adrien smiled softly, letting a bit of the pain slip onto his lips unintentionally.

Luka frowned. “Group date night?”

“It’s all couples. I’d be the odd man out,” Adrien explained, keeping the smile in place with some effort.

Luka’s eyes widened. “I’m sorry. I didn’t realize…”

Adrien shrugged unhappily. “Don’t worry about it. Hey, it was great getting to hear you play. Have fun with…with the others,” Adrien offered in parting, turning back to lean on the bar.

Luka blinked rapidly. “Wait. What are you going to do?”

“Oh, probably just get a drink, hang around for a little while, see if anyone asks me to dance. I don’t really feel like being alone at the moment, so going home to mope around by myself is out,” Adrien answered honestly.

Luka rested an elbow on the bar, his body bracketing Adrien’s. “Is there someone else you could call to hang out with? I don’t really like the idea of you drinking by yourself and getting hit on by strangers.”

“I’m fine. Don’t worry about it,” Adrien assured with a small but genuine grin as he met Luka’s eyes. “Thanks for worrying about me.”

“How can I help worrying about you?” Luka sighed, running a hand through his hair. “You make it so easy. You don’t handle alcohol well, and you drink too much without thinking when you’re upset.”

“I’m not upset. Just a little melancholy.” Adrien shrugged. “Look, I swear I’m not trying to manipulate you into spending time with me. I’m actually okay, and I’m going to _be_ okay having one drink and dancing with some random people and getting myself home. You don’t need to stress over it unless the real problem is you not liking the idea of me dancing with other people. I’ve got Plagg and Nooroo with me; I’ll be fine. If I’m not, they’ll make sure someone knows. So don’t let me ruin your evening. Go hang out with your friends…with your girlfriend. I’m sure they’re waiting for you.”

Luka bit his lip hard. “They can wait a little longer. I mean, I don’t have to go right this second. Didn’t you offer to buy me a drink and stroke my ego for a bit? I’m thirsty and could use the attention.”

Adrien gave a snorted laugh. “I could make so many jokes right now. Everything from ‘I don’t do quickies’ to ‘buy me dinner first’, but seeing as you have the sweetest, most giving girlfriend on the face of the planet, I will assume that your needs are being more than satisfied—”

_“—You’d be surprised,”_ Luka thought darkly.

“—and skip the suggestive banter. I’d be happy to buy you a drink while I rave about your creative genius, though,” Adrien replied with a smirk.

Luka briefly contemplated remarking on how it really ground down your self-confidence and made you feel undesirable fast when your girlfriend always gave you her cheek when you tried to kiss her and looked incredibly uncomfortable when you told her you loved her. Luka wondered what Adrien would do with that information.

Adrien signaled for the bartender. “Raoul, could I please have a Pink Squirrel and…” He turned expectantly to Luka.

“Scotch. Splash of water, please.”

“Coming right up,” Raoul confirmed.

Luka raised an eyebrow at Adrien. “Pink Squirrel? Forgive me, but are you positive that you’re straight?”

“Rude.” Adrien kicked Luka in the ankle and stuck out his tongue. “I don’t believe in labels…and my drink preferences have nothing to do with whether or not I sleep with guys.”

Luka held up his hands in surrender. “Sorry. That was in poor taste. I should know better.”

Adrien bit his lip. “…I think I’ve been guilty of worse, so I’m inclined to give you a get out of jail free card this time.”

“Your magnanimity is much appreciated,” Luka assured with a slight dip of his head.

“You’d better appreciate it.” Adrien rolled his eyes and smirked. “Next time, I’m making you grovel.”

“And it will serve me right.” Luka gave another bob of his head.

“Right,” Adrien affirmed. “…And while we’re on the subject, it’s not my fault that I like dessert-y drinks. I _never_ get dessert.”

“Fair,” Luka agreed.

“I can’t help it that I like a little sugar with my alcohol,” Adrien continued in his own defence.

“Rather, you like a little alcohol with your _sugar_,” Luka snickered, feeling like they were back on solid enough ground to joke.

Adrien steamrolled forward, looking off to the side. “…just like I can’t help if there are certain boys I’d like to kiss.”

Luka’s brain stopped working. Did Adrien just…? Did Adrien mean…?

And, if so, what was Luka supposed to do with that?

Before Luka could really process that revelation, Adrien pressed on, “Besides, it’s Rose’s fault for introducing me to Pink Squirrels. Also, something Rose told me: apparently, it’s possible to be something called ‘biromantic’ while still being heterosexual…. And that’s as much as I think I should blurt out without having ‘I’m drunk’ as an excuse. But there you go; cards on the table,” Adrien spit out rapidly, twisting his ring round and round his finger. “Let’s talk about something else. I said I was going to talk your ear off about what a great musician you are, didn’t I? Has anyone told you how wonderful you are today?” The words spewed out of Adrien’s mouth, and Luka struggled to keep up.

“Wait.” Luka placed a hand on Adrien’s upper arm.

Adrien turned his head to smile the fakest, most personable smile he had in him. “How’s your girlfriend doing? I haven’t talked to her much lately,” he inquired civilly, as if speaking to a business acquaintance at a cocktail party.

Luka groaned softly in frustration.

Raoul approached and looked like he was about to say something teasingly, but he felt the mood between the two from a meter away and thought better of it, setting their drinks on the counter with a cordial nod.

“Oh, look,” Adrien observed cheerily. “Something to put in my mouth to shut me up.”

Luka choked on air as inappropriate suggestions rose in his mind.

“Before I destroy everything,” Adrien added under his breath, but then his joviality was back.

[“I drink to you.”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FcQeTCsQ5w4&list=PL78TsyiiZjhGGJhndz_P-8EbshbYcFDxB&index=1) Adrien lifted his glass to Luka with a practiced smile covering his internal panic. He looked away and began to sip at the pink concoction.

“So…we’re not going to talk about this?” Luka sighed, ignoring his scotch for the time being.

Adrien shrugged. “What?—_Here_? Now? No. I’m supposed to be talking about your music for a bit before you have to go back to your girlfriend. Besides, there’s nothing to talk about,” he answered a touch sullenly down into his drink.

“You just told me you wanted to kiss me,” Luka laughed, on the brink of hysteria but covering it up brilliantly. “And we’re not going to discuss that?”

“I never said I wanted to kiss you,” Adrien corrected, still not looking at Luka. “I said I couldn’t help it if I wanted to kiss certain boys. I was talking about Nino.”

Luka’s mind ground to a sudden halt as he tried to figure out if that was true or merely a diversion.

“Because I’m a home-wrecking slut,” Adrien laughed with a sweet smile that proved jarring in its juxtaposition with the words it accompanied.

Luka’s hand squeezed Adrien’s arm tighter. “No, you’re not.”

“Fine,” Adrien relented. “I’m an _aspiring_ home-wrecking slut. I guess I can’t claim the title until I actually wreck something, but…I _want_ to wreck them. Isn’t that bad enough?”

Part of Luka’s mind thought that, yes, this was very, very bad indeed. Adrien wasn’t looking for a relationship. As per usual, he was seeking affection and attention, and he was coming back to where he’d found it in abundance two years prior…but, this time, Luka’s supply couldn’t meet Adrien’s demand. It was a tricky situation, and Luka could tell that between Marinette and Adrien, his own heart was going to walk out of this one in tatters…if it could walk at all once those two were done with it.

Still….

“What if Nino wants you to kiss him?”

Adrien slowly turned an incredulous glare on Luka. “Please don’t patronize me. Why the hell would Nino want to kiss me? He’s in a relationship with the girl of his dreams. He’s been crazy in love with his girlfriend for _years_. Why would he risk messing that up for _me_?”

“…You still don’t think you’re worth anything, do you?” Luka realized, his stomach going sour.

Adrien rolled his eyes. “Well, obviously, I’m athletic, and, on the outside, I’m gorgeous, but _inside_ I’m a monster. I’m not worthless, but I’m sure as hell not going to get picked over Mar—over _Alya_.”

“Angel,” Luka whispered, conveying so much meaning in so few syllables.

Adrien looked up, his heart fluttering at the old nickname. He’d been “Ariel” in the months since their reunion. It had been a long time since Luka had called him Angel or Perfect Fifth in that tender, all-embracing way of his.

“Adrien,” Luka corrected. “_You_ are not the monster. The monster is the ugliness inside of yourself that you’re fighting against…and _everyone_ has something inside themselves like that…even Alya.”

Adrien found himself unable to speak, so he gave Luka a wavering yet grateful smile instead.

“Besides,” Luka shrugged, picking up his scotch and taking a sip. “There are so many good things about you that you didn’t even mention.”

Adrien was about to challenge Luka to name one when Luka continued, “Like your beautifully awful sense of humor and your virtuosic piano abilities and your encyclopedic knowledge of cheese.”

Adrien burst out laughing as the tense atmosphere was obliterated. “You still…say the sweetest things,” he chortled.

Luka shrugged. “Eh. I know where your buttons are…just like how you always have your fingers on mine.”

Adrien’s laughter died down, and a tentative smile settled onto his lips. “…Sometimes I wonder if I still know where they are or if they’ve shifted in the time we’ve been apart. You still seem like the same you, but…a year and a half is a long time. I feel like I’ve probably missed something important.”

Luka took another sip of his scotch, considering before answering, “Yes and no. I’m different, but I’m still me. All the important bits are there…and, as for the rest, we have plenty of time to catch up now that your father isn’t being a psycho and keeping us apart. If I have new ‘buttons’, I’m confident you’ll find them and start pressing them eventually…probably sooner rather than later.”

“Good to know you believe in me,” Adrien hummed and then paused. “…Are we okay?”

He cast a nervous, sidelong glance at Luka. “I didn’t ruin everything, did I?”

Luka frowned. “No. Of course not. I mean—” He winced and hastily corrected, “—of _course_ we’re okay.”

Adrien blew out a slow breath. “Okay. Good. Sorry. As I’m sure you’ll remember, I kind of suck at the whole self-worth thing, and I’m constantly worrying that people are going to stop caring about me overnight if I make a mistake, so…and I know things are kind of odd between us with the whole…well. Me being in love with your girlfriend, so… And probably me bringing up wanting to wreck things between Alya and Nino so that I could kiss him was…”

“Adrien?” Luka bumped Adrien’s arm gently. “It’s okay. I say this in the most loving, accepting way possible, but…I know you’re a mess. I accept that you are a screwed-up human being with crazy, ugly stuff going on in your life…. I still like you and want to be your friend. We’re okay.”

Adrien studied Luka’s face for a minute before nodding solemnly. “Okay. You should probably be canonized as the patron saint of patience and radical acceptance, but I’m really glad to hear that you feel that way.”

Luka’s lips pulled into a lopsided smirk as he raised his glass. “To friendship and radical acceptance.”

Adrien clinked his glass against Luka’s and drank.

“…So…” Adrien led in after a measure of silence, his voice gliding up to land on the note.

Luka cocked an eyebrow.

“The last song you guys played. That was one of yours too, right?” Adrien angled his body slightly away from the bar counter and more towards Luka as Adrien’s desire to close himself off dissipated.

Luka nodded. “Yeah. Thoughts?”

“You’re a genius.” Adrien shrugged. “Second coming of Mozart.”

Luka scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Blasphemy. Seriously, what did you think? No flattery. I respect your musical opinion more than almost anyone, so please give it to me.”

“I _am_ being serious,” Adrien assured. “Your sound is so unique. People are going to go crazy for you once you get some more exposure. I honestly can’t offer you a critique because you’re legitimately just that good, Luka.”

The earnest adoration in Adrien’s eyes and voice turned Luka’s legs to jelly. This was exactly what he needed to patch up the wounds of inadequacy his relationship with Marinette had been inflicting upon him.

“Careful, Ariel. You’re going to give me a big head,” he chuckled, leaning on the bar, gravitating closer.

Adrien rolled his eyes. “If anyone deserves to have a big head, it’s you. Seriously. Just keep doing what you’re doing.”

“Okay,” Luka relented. “If you won’t give me a critique, at least tell me what specifically you liked so I can do something similar in the future.”

“In the last song?” Adrien took a sip of his drink and then licked the creamy remnants from his top lip. “The bass line. Particularly, about halfway through, that [descending chromatic](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9iAHo2GZP8Q). Ugh.” Adrien’s eyelids fluttered in ecstasy. “It made me melt. Nothing makes me go all tingly faster than those low notes. It’s like aural pornography.”

“N-Noted,” Luka gulped, suddenly getting all manner of ideas that he had no business entertaining. He did _not_ need to know how to musically seduce Adrien Agreste. “What else?”

Adrien bit his lip. “There’s this [leitmotif](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leitmotif) that’s been showing up in your work lately.”

Luka shifted uncomfortably, knowing exactly what Adrien was referring to and not wanting to own up to its inspiration.

“It’s not even the main theme, and sometimes it only pops up once in a piece for just a second, but it’s pervasive throughout your recent oeuvre. It’s the same sequence of serpentine, kind of…gypsy, [tarantella](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GpxCREPeo4c), [Habanera](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tSsNFPk2vNA), [Anitra’s Dance](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gcEnSITNaGM)…sort of played as a mix between a tango and a waltz. You know what I’m talking about?” Adrien eyed Luka expectantly.

Luka shifted again, taking a sip of his scotch before replying in an offhanded way. “Oh. The Siren Leitmotif. It’s…been stuck in my head lately…kind of driving me nuts. I didn’t realize that it was ending up in…well, everything.”

“Siren Leitmotif?” Adrien echoed with an arched eyebrow.

Luka cleared his throat. “You know how Berlioz’s [Symphonie Fantastique](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Symphonie_fantastique) musically tells the story of a musician’s unrequited love and how it gradually drives him mad?”

Adrien, familiar with [the piece](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ewoAW-Zyuj8), nodded.

Luka continued, “And you know how throughout the piece the idea of his beloved is represented by the same repeating musical phrase? I guess the Siren Leitmotif is kind of like that.”

Adrien’s eyes widened. “Oh.”

The leitmotif was Marinette.

Suddenly, Adrien didn’t care for the tune as much as he had before.

“It’s…I like it. It’s very…exotic,” Adrien did his best to cover the abrupt turn his mood had taken. “…It doesn’t sound very much like Marinette, though—at least, not to me,” he hurriedly amended.

But then, Adrien reasoned, Adrien wasn’t Marinette’s boyfriend. Chat Noir and Marinette had only made out once. Phenomenal though it had been, it wasn’t actually a lot to go on. How would Adrien _really_ know what Marinette was like intimately?

A terrible realization: Were Marinette and Luka sleeping together?! They must be. They’d been going out for two months, and Luka was crazy about Marinette. Surely, at this point in time, Marinette had fallen wildly in love with Luka—how could she not have?

“Because it isn’t,” Luka replied, cutting into Adrien’s downward mental spiral.

Adrien blinked, backtracking. _“Because it isn’t…what?”_

Because the Siren Leitmotif wasn’t…Marinette? But then…who? Who the hell else could it be? Who had managed to get into Luka’s head, capture his attention enough to subconsciously permeate into Luka’s music? Who could—?

“Siren,” Adrien whispered. “As in…a mermaid?”

Luka frowned but then nodded.

Slowly, a vindicated grin spread across Adrien’s lips. “As in…Disney’s The Little Mermaid…_Ariel_?”

Luka’s face went ashen and then flushed. He looked away, bringing his glass up to his mouth, hiding behind it.

“You know,” Adrien giggled in glee, “for the longest time, I thought that nickname was a Shakespeare’s The Tempest reference, but…”

“You weren’t supposed to find out,” Luka muttered into his drink, his shoulders scrunching up in horrified mortification with a touch of dread.

“I’m your siren,” Adrien continued to laugh, suddenly over the moon because Luka was thinking about him. He’d gotten into Luka’s head, under Luka’s skin.

Luka sighed audibly, setting down his glass and running a hand through his hair.

Adrien turned his body so that he was facing Luka full on. “Don’t make that face,” he cooed.

“I’m not making a face,” Luka grumbled. “What face?”

Adrien gave Luka’s nose a poke. “The face you make when you wish you had a guitar in your hands so that you didn’t have to talk.”

Luka lifted an eyebrow. “I have a face for that?”

Adrien nodded, the teasing coming out of his voice to be replaced by softness. “Yeah, but you usually don’t make it at me. At least you didn’t…before. I guess things have changed.”

Luka chewed on his bottom lip, reluctantly meeting Adrien’s uncertain gaze. “Not as much as you seem to think.”

“…I thought you were over me,” Adrien admitted.

“In all fairness? I thought I was too…until you ran smack into me at that party two months ago.” Luka shook his head. “I mean, I knew a part of me would always have feelings for you, but…I didn’t anticipate…” His brow furrowed deeply. “These past few months have been emotionally confusing as we’ve become friends again and you’ve reminded me of all the things time and distance helped me to forget.”

Adrien took a step closer, his thigh brushing Luka’s. “…Am I driving you nuts?” he whispered, his hand coming to rest on Luka’s chest and slowly trailing up to Luka’s shoulder.

“Cards on the table?” Luka breathed in frustration. “Yes. Between you and Marinette, I am going insane. I’m glad you find this so amusing.”

“Hey, I have a leitmotif,” Adrien chuckled, “and it is sexy and alluring and vibrant and fierce and…and _that’s_ how this really amazing guy thinks of me? You have made my week. Yes, I’m amused. Are you kidding? I’m freaking ecstatic. Luka, I have felt _so_ low this year. I’ve felt ugly and-and like a total dumpster fire. I’ve felt unsalvageable, but…God, your music is beautiful, and that theme is supposed to be me? I feel…” Finally the emotions caught up with Adrien, and he got choked up. “…so good right now. Genuinely good.”

Luka’s mouth (which had dropped open around the part where Adrien had called Luka amazing) flapped open and closed impotently. There was so much he wanted to say, but the words weren’t coming together. He _really_ wished he had a guitar so that he could play Adrien what he was feeling.

Adrien smiled, patting Luka’s shoulder. “Don’t worry. You can play it for me later,” he assured.

Luka nodded. “You think I’m amazing?”

Adrien cracked up a little. “Luka, I legitimately think you’re the second coming of Mozart. What higher praise do you want from me?”

“Snap,” Luka chuckled giddily. “You were serious about that.”

“Yes. Yes, I was.” Adrien rolled his eyes.

Luka’s entire face went carnelian.

“It’s so easy to make you happy,” Adrien observed with a hum of amusement. He rubbed his knee up Luka’s thigh and snatched Luka’s hand, spiriting it to Adrien’s lips for a butterfly kiss. “And you’re so cute when you blush.”

Luka’s flush deepened as both his tongue and his stomach tied themselves into knots.

“You’re sure I can’t steal you for the night?” Adrien hummed, wanting nothing more than to go back to the Liberty for shared music and deep, meaningful chats and snuggling in Luka’s bed and maybe even a kiss or four or six or eight.

Luka gave a little gasp of realization and tried to take a step back, but Adrien followed. “I don’t…Ariel, this isn’t just platonic flirting anymore.”

Adrien thought about it for a minute before agreeing. “…No. No, it’s not.”

“I can’t do this,” Luka breathed plaintively.

Adrien bit his lip, studying Luka’s face.

Luka’s normally clear blue eyes were cloudy as they begged, “_Please_ don’t make me do this” but at the same time whispered, “You _could_ make me do this…if you really wanted to”.

Adrien’s fingers dipped into Luka’s jacket pocket and pulled out a guitar pick. He stepped back to a reasonable distance and began to roll the pick back and forth over his knuckles, between his fingers.

He looked down at the remains of his drink in the glass on the counter and sullenly considered his situation. He felt frustrated that he’d missed out when Luka had been available and very much in love with the oblivious and confused Adrien. He felt cheated now that Luka was with Marinette so that Adrien couldn’t be with either of them. He was jealous. Marinette didn’t need Luka. If she didn’t want Adrien, why couldn’t she be with any of the dozen other guys who had crushes on her? Did it have to be Luka?

He turned the question back on himself: Did it _have_ to be Luka? Did it _have_ to be Marinette? Could he somehow extract himself from the situation and figure out how to be okay? He’d been doing so much better in respect to his mental health the past few months. Did he really need to complicate things with his relationships?

No…but he _wanted_ to. He wanted love and affection—Luka’s kisses and fond smiles, Marinette’s thoughtful gestures and adoring looks, kind words and praise and light touches and—if Adrien couldn’t have Marinette, he could at least have Luka, couldn’t he? Marinette didn’t _need_ Luka. And Adrien could be good to him. _Would_ be good to him. There would be other men for Marinette, and Luka would have Adrien, so no one was really missing out if Adrien took it upon himself to…rearrange the relationships between them…right?

“But aren’t you doing it already?” Adrien hummed.

Luka’s face lost all color.

“I mean…the Siren Leitmotif has been showing up in your work these past two months, hasn’t it?” he challenged. “Even without me doing anything to actively encourage things between us, I’ve been on your mind, haven’t I?”

“Adrien,” Luka sighed, gripping at the roots of his hair. “Look. I realize that I’ve been unfaithful to Marinette in my thoughts, but there’s a big difference between…”

Adrien let the guitar pick fly out of his hand. “Whoops.”

Luka abruptly went silent as Adrien dropped into a feline-like crouch to retrieve the guitar pick and then slowly rolled up, leading with his behind in a way that gave Luka all kinds of bad ideas.

Adrien turned back around and smiled impishly as he purred, “Sorry. What were you saying?”

“Adrien,” Luka groaned at the object of his desire’s deliberate teasing.

“Luka,” Adrien echoed, playing innocent.

Luka shook his head. “You know exactly what you’re doing,” he accused. “And I’m asking you to stop.”

Adrien slipped the guitar pick back into Luka’s pocket and looked away with a pout.

“Adrien,” Luka called firmly, taking Adrien by the shoulders and forcing him to look at Luka. “Please. We both know that you don’t really want what you’re pretending that you want.”

Adrien frowned. “What does that even mean?”

“It means,” Luka explained patiently, his hands moving up to Adrien’s face, “that you don’t really want to seduce me. Didn’t you just tell me a little bit ago that you weren’t sexually attracted to other guys when you alluded to being biromantic heterosexual? Haven’t you told me before that you’re not interested in a relationship right now while you’re not emotionally well? Adrien, you don’t want to sleep with me. You don’t want to be with me. You don’t want to grow old together or build a life with me or take care of sick kids or figure out how to finance buying a house. You’re not thinking of any of that.”

Luka’s voice was soft and not accusing or angry or bitter, but there was a pain in Luka’s eyes that cut through Adrien, filling him with guilt anyway.

He was doing what Marinette had done to him to Luka. All of the sudden, Adrien felt vile, lower than dirt.

“Luka, I’m sorry. I—”

Luka cut him off with a finger pressed to Adrien’s lips. “Shh. It’s fine.”

_“No, it’s really not,”_ Adrien wanted to argue.

“I know you’re going through a lot,” Luka assured. “I know you just want attention and affection. Things, first with Ladybug and then Marinette, haven’t been easy for you, and even though your father is doing a better job in recent months, there’s still a big affection deficit in your life that’s going to take a long time to fill. I know that you don’t mean to hurt me and that you weren’t thinking about what effect your actions would have on me at all, really. That’s why I’m telling you now.”

Luka ran a thumb over Adrien’s lips, eyes pinning Adrien like a butterfly. “We have three options. One, you get one hundred percent serious about me.” Luka paused to let his words sink in. “Two, we stay just friends with normal levels of platonic flirting, and I keep trying to maintain a hold on my feelings for you.” Another solemn pause for reflection. “Three,” Luka winced. “we don’t see each other anymore.”

Adrien’s hand flew to Luka’s wrist, gripping tightly. His bottom lip trembled. He shook his head. He couldn’t even verbalize a response.

Luka smiled reassuringly, giving Adrien’s cheek a comforting pat. “Well, then, behave, okay? Don’t tempt me because I’m not a cheater. I want to keep being around you because you make _me_ feel genuinely good too. You’re a precious friend to me, Adrien. I don’t want to lose that again. Having you ripped away from me once was hard enough.”

Adrien shook his head, feeling very much afraid. “You were wrong…. I have no idea what the hell I’m doing.” He couldn’t get over the sinking feeling that he was going to wreck everything once more.

“Hey.” Luka’s thumb gently stroked Adrien’s cheek. “Shhh. Calm down. It’s going to be fine. Just breathe. Don’t panic. We’re going to figure this out, okay?”

Adrien took a deep breath, body shaking. He nodded. “Sorry about the mood swings. I swear I’m fine. I just…”

“Close your eyes,” Luka instructed.

Adrien frowned but did as asked. A second later he felt gentle kisses placed on his eyelids, Luka’s breath warm on his face as Luka whispered, “You’re okay, Perfect Fifth.”

Adrien’s grip on Luka’s forearm tightened. “Luka…” His eyes fluttered open. “I’m sorry. I’ll be good,” he promised.

Luka smiled. “I know you will. I’ll do my best on my end as well.”

A cacophony of texts began to pour in on Luka’s phone, snapping the two out of the moment.

“The hell?” Luka frowned as he pulled his phone out of his pocket. “Sorry.”

A text came in on Adrien’s phone too.

Luka cursed under his breath as he read, “WTH do u think ur doing?!” from Juleka followed by an onslaught of question marks and exclamation points sent individually so that Luka could not ignore her.

“It’s my sister. She disapproves,” Luka sighed, typing back, “we’re just talking”, “chill”.

“Apparently, from Nino’s angle, it looked like you kissed me for real,” Adrien groaned. “He’s freaking out.”

Luka ran a hand back and forth through his hair vigorously. “Yeah, he’s coming over here.”

Adrien cursed softly, grabbing Luka’s scotch glass. “I’m going to need this,” he grumbled, downing the rest of the contents with a wince before turning to face Nino.

“What the hell, Mec?!” Nino hissed, taking Adrien by the arm and tugging him. “Have you completely lost your mind? You’ve completely lost your mind!”

“Nino,” Luka interceded. “This is a misunderstanding. I just kissed him on the cheek. It wasn’t—”

“—You. Don’t even start with me,” Nino warned, waving a finger in Luka’s face. “I like you, Luka, but you’re screwing around with two of my best friends. You are on thin ice.”

“Nino,” Adrien sighed, pulling on Nino’s arm. “_I’m_ the one trying to seduce _him_. You should be yelling at _me_.”

Nino rolled his eyes. “_You_ are having a quarter-life crisis. You and I will have a talk later when you’re sober, Adrien, but, for now, he’s taking advantage of you, and—”

“—Are you sure about that?” Adrien scoffed. “Because _I’m_ having to do a heck of a lot of the work, and I don’t feel like he’s deriving any benefit from me. Maybe someone should teach him how to take advantage better.”

Nino gritted his teeth. “Adrien—”

“—Okay.” Luka stepped in. “This is not a productive conversation. Maybe we need to call a time out and discuss things later when we’re feeling more level-headed.”

Adrien and Nino both snorted.

“Adrien, Nino’s just concerned because he cares about you,” Luka reasoned calmly, trying to defuse the situation. “Nino, yes, Adrien is having a rough time lately, but he’s not a child. Now, if we could all take a deep breath?”

Begrudgingly, Nino and Adrien inhaled slowly in tandem.

“Good. Nino?”

Nino cocked an eyebrow, not letting go of his attitude entirely, lest Luka mistakenly think he’d been forgiven.

“I want to make sure Adrien gets home safely. Since I don’t think you’d approve of me escorting him, could you please take him or see that he gets into an Agreste vehicle?”

Nino shrugged. “I was planning on it.”

“Good,” Luka repeated. “Thank you. If you’ll excuse me, I’ll go check in with the others.”

“Wait.” Adrien reached out a hand as Luka made to go.

Luka read the anxiety on Adrien’s face and smiled. “Don’t worry,” he assured. “We’re good. I’ll text you later?”

Adrien nodded, conjuring up a smile in answer.

Nino sighed as they watched Luka walk away. “Mec…I understand that your whole life is exploding this year, but couldn’t you have picked any other guy? _Literally_ any other guy? Why do you have to set yourself up to get hurt?”

Adrien shrugged, looping his arm through Nino’s. “_Literally_ any other guy?”

“Yes,” Nino insisted.

Adrien chuckled, leaning in to lick Nino’s cheek. “Don’t you think Alya will mind sharing?”

Nino cursed under his breath. “Dude. Don’t make me bite you.”

“There’s a snapping turtle joke in there somewhere,” Adrien mused.

Nino shook his head, pulling Adrien towards the exit. “You keep me up nights worrying about you.”

Adrien was silent for a few steps before answering. “…Sorry…. Thanks.”

“It’s what I’m here for,” Nino assured, bumping Adrien’s hip with his own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Firstly, I hear people asking, "Why is Nooroo with Adrien?" In Daisy, Gabriel has given up being Papillon after finding out that Adrien is Chat Noir. He gave the Butterfly Miraculous to Nathalie to hide from him (See Daisy Chapters Nine and Ten: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19056958/chapters/45515047). Mayura gives the Butterfly Miraculous to Chat Noir (knowing he's Adrien). Adrien doesn't know about Mayura and Papillon's identities. So Nooroo is with Adrien at this point in the timeline.
> 
> Question: Do we like all of the music nerdiness? Is it hard to follow? I've tried to include examples of what Luka and Adrien are talking about for people who don't have any background in music. Are those helpful? Are people using those? I hope at the very least that you're having fun learning about something new and hearing new music or learning the names of pieces you've heard in popular culture but never knew where they came from. ^.^;
> 
> Now, who clicked on the link in "I drink to you"? Those of you who did were confused, weren't you? Unless you're familiar with Wagner's leitmotifs in Tristan und Isolde. Adrien is making a joke that he doesn't expect anyone else to get. In the opera, Tristan and Isolde think that they're drinking poison, but Isolde's maid has put a love potion in the cup instead. Tristan drinks first, and then Isolde snatches the cup from him, claiming that half is for her. She says, "I drink to you" (as the leitmotif in the link plays), and they fall in love instead of dying. Their unfortunate, star-crossed love dooms them to death anyway. Adrien is being melodramatic and seeing parallels between his own star-crossed, hopeless situation and the opera. This is just a little piece of subtle character psychology that I snuck in...until you know it's there, and then it's ham-fisted and glaring...but that should give you some background for what's going through Adrien's head as he says the line.
> 
> But did you like the chapter? I hope so. It was kind of intense. I'll try to do some pure fluff next time...or, at least, something fluffier. ^.^;
> 
> Thanks so much for reading!
> 
> References:  
Tritones: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JJIO-Jr0E8o  
Mahler’s Ninth Symphony (17:00-18:40, “heart attack” at approximately 18:14/measure 314): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ah3mcaRpc9Q and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Symphony_No._9_(Mahler)  
Tristan und Isolde “I drink to you”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FcQeTCsQ5w4&list=PL78TsyiiZjhGGJhndz_P-8EbshbYcFDxB&index=1  
Descending Chromatic: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9iAHo2GZP8Q  
Leitmotif: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leitmotif  
Saint-Saëns Tarantella: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GpxCREPeo4c  
Habanera from Carmen: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tSsNFPk2vNA  
Grieg’s Peer Gynt/Anitra’s Dance: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gcEnSITNaGM  
Berlioz Symphonie Fantastique: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Symphonie_fantastique https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ewoAW-Zyuj8


	6. Compromised Compromises

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Tell you what,” Adrien snickered. “You put some clothes on and come over…and then I’ll take my clothes off when you get here…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there! Welcome back. I unexpectedly had this idea for a chapter Monday night. I sat down to write a little five-hundred word drabble, but then this happened. I hope you enjoy it anyway.
> 
> Thank you to everyone who left comments or kudos or bookmarked the story. I really appreciate your support!
> 
> I don't know that this chapter is canon to Jabberwocky either, but here it is. It takes place in September when Adrien is eighteen and a half and Luka is just short of twenty-one.

Luka’s eyes reluctantly slid open as the phone rang for a third time, vibrating loudly on the nightstand. He let out a venomous, basilisk hiss, and his hand shot out from under the covers to seize the hated device.

His anger disintegrated into fear when he saw the name on the readout, and he nearly fumbled the phone in his haste to answer.

“Are you okay? What’s wrong?” Luka demanded, holding his breath to hear Adrien’s voice.

“…Uh…nothing,” Adrien responded haltingly, slightly startled at the vehemence in Luka’s voice. “I mean, I’m fine. Sorry. I didn’t mean to frighten you.”

With a leaden sigh, Luka collapsed back down onto the bed. “Ariel, if you’re not dying or in trouble or something, why did you feel the need to call me three times in a row at—” He pulled away to check the time. “—freaking nine o’clock on a bloody Saturday morning after you _know_ I’ve been out late at a gig—…that you were _also_ at until late. Adrien, what the hell are you doing up?”

“Sorry,” Adrien chuckled sheepishly. “I mean, at least I waited until nine o’clock, right?”

Luka tried to process that statement, but his brain was running a little slowly. “Adrien, how long have you been up?”

“Oh, a while,” Adrien replied with factitious nonchalance. “Not too long.”

“What’s wrong?” Luka repeated, more calmly this time.

“Why would you think something was wrong?” Adrien laughed…only it was more the idea of laughing than the actual thing itself.

“Adrien,” Luka sighed knowingly.

“I’m calling because you should come over.” False cheerfulness. It was almost as if Adrien thought that Luka _couldn’t_ read him like an eye exam chart.

“That would involve getting out of bed and getting dressed,” Luka grumbled, trying to keep his eyes open.

“Tell you what,” Adrien snickered. “You put some clothes on and come over…and then _I’ll_ take my clothes _off_ when you get here…”

Suddenly Luka was wide awake.

“…and change into swimming trunks so we can make use of the pool,” Adrien finished impishly.

Luka rolled over onto his stomach, held the phone out at arms’ length, and proceeded to scream into his pillow.

“…shame that I have an Olympic swimming pool” Adrien was saying when Luka put the phone back to his ear. “in my basement that never gets used? It’s just going to waste, so today I thought, ‘I should invite a friend over and go swimming’. So I called you.”

“Ariel, don’t you have a specific friend that you swim with?” Luka sighed at the obvious presence of an ulterior motive.

“Kim is with _Ondine_,” Adrien pouted. “They swim every Saturday from eight to noon and then go on a date. Part of me is glad that Kim is over my ex, Marie, and actually in a healthy relationship with someone whom he really clicks with…but another part of me resents the fact that he’s busy when the whim to swim has struck me.”

Luka took a minute to decide whether he wanted to comment on any of that. “…Where’s Nino?”

“With Alya,” Adrien muttered. “He’s off duty. They spent the night together after your show, so…yeah. They’re either asleep or they’re not asleep, and I don’t want to interrupt in either case.”

_“But it’s okay to wake _me_ up?”_ Luka wondered. The last time he checked, he and Nino fulfilled similar roles in Adrien’s life. What if Luka had been with Marinette? Had that thought even crossed Adrien’s mind? To the best of Luka’s knowledge, Adrien didn’t know that nothing physical was really happening between Luka and Marinette.

“Chloé?” Luka mentally went down the list of Adrien’s friends.

“She’s at the spa.”

“Kagami?”

“On Saturdays she has to spend the morning meditating and doing kendo and Yamato Nadeshiko training,” Adrien responded flatly. “Her mom is really serious about making sure Kagami has a well-rounded education—traditional and modern.”

“Oookay. How about that model girl you hang out with? Your ex?” Luka was running out of viable options. It was looking like he was going to have to resist the temptation of Adrien in swimming trunks on very little sleep.

God help him.

“Photoshoot,” Adrien grumbled.

“That one fanboy guy?” Luka tried.

Adrien cleared his throat. “Uh…his significant other isn’t comfortable with the idea of Wayem and me alone together wearing so little clothing.”

“I see,” Luka hummed. _“Probably a smart idea.”_

“I’d invite Marc or Nathaniel, but you can’t just invite one and not the other, but if you invite both, they’re all couple-y, and I just…don’t need to be around couple-y right now, honestly.”

There was a shifting of fabric, and it almost sounded like Adrien had laid down on his bed. “Please come over,” Adrien entreated in a breathy whisper.

Luka grimaced. _“Oh, Angel…. Angel, Angel, Angel.”_

“Ariel, you and Rose are practically joined at the hip again, aren’t you? Why don’t you see if she wants to swim?”

Boundaries. There had to be boundaries, limits. Luka was not a cheater. He wasn’t…. He didn’t want to be.

Adrien didn’t reply.

Luka could feel a cold glare in the silence. “Ariel?”

“No points for guessing whom Rose is in bed with right now,” Adrien snorted. “I mean, you did see them making out last night, didn’t you?”

“Yeeeeah. Yeah. Sorry.” Luka bit his lip, out of options.

“…Fine. I’m not going to beg. If you don’t want to come over, that’s fine,” Adrien informed conversationally, carefully keeping any hint of emotion out of his voice. “You don’t have to. I can swim by myself. I don’t even really feel like swimming, to tell you the truth, but, if I did, I wouldn’t need anyone to swim with because I’m totally okay by myself. Only not in a petulant, self-deluding way but for real because my therapist says that I’m making really amazing progress, and she has an ethical responsibility not to lie to me about things like that…despite the fact that my father paid the hospital a lot of money, but…”

Luka tried to wring a suitable response out of his sluggish brain.

Adrien beat him to the punch with a frustrated grumble. “I _am_ fine…fine enough. I just…didn’t want to be alone. I _did_ call a lot of people before you because I _did_ realize how early it was for the morning after a show, but…everyone else has their boyfriend or their girlfriend, so…”

Luka’s brow furrowed in confusion. “Adrien…so do I. I have Marinette.”

Instantaneously, Luka realized that that had not been the right answer, and he cursed his sleep-deprived brain and the mouth attached to it. “Wait. I’m sorry. I—”

“—Sorry-wrong-number,” Adrien squeaked out before cutting the connection.

Luka sat up in bed cursing.

Adrien did not pick up any of the four times Luka attempted to call him back.

Calls failing, Luka tried text: “P5 i am so sorry plz call me back”. “Adrien”. “Angel talk to me”. “i swear i was not implying anything”. “i am just f-ing tired”. “Adrien”. “P5”. “Angel”.

When not even the old nicknames worked, Luka got desperate.

“Monsieur Couffaine,” Gabriel’s dry voice emanated from the receiver. “To what do I owe—”

“—Where’s your son, please?” Luka cut to the chase. There was no love lost between himself and Gabriel Agreste and, therefore, no need for pleasantries. Luka only behaved civilly towards Gabriel for Adrien’s sake, and Luka suspected that Gabriel did the same.

There was the clacking of fingers on a keyboard and then, “The tracking data from his phone says that he’s in his bedroom. I imagine he’s asleep. I understand that you all got home late—or, rather, early—last night.”

Luka pinched the bridge of his nose. “Please go check. I was just talking to him, and I may have accidentally said something that may have felt like ‘let’s break up’ or ‘I don’t need you’ or ‘I’m not your boyfriend’ or something equally horrible that I in no way intended.”

To Gabriel’s credit, he was on his feet and leaving his office in seconds without saving the document he had been working on, hurrying to Adrien’s room. “May I ask how the bloody hell you managed that?” Gabriel snorted indignantly. “You’re still officially dating Miss Dupain-Cheng, are you not?”

“Yeah,” Luka sighed. “It’s…complicated. I went to bed, like, three hours ago, so I’m not really at the top of my game. Adrien said something about being lonely because it seemed like everyone else had a romantic partner except me and him…or maybe he was implying that everyone else had a romantic partner like he had me, so…but I totally missed the important part about him being lonely and reminded him that I have a girlfriend.”

“…I am not impressed with you,” Gabriel reported.

“I’m not impressed with me either right now, actually,” Luka groaned. “He hung up on me, and he’s not answering when I try to call him back to apologize and explain. That’s why I called the number you gave me in the event of an emergency. I can only hope that because neither Plagg nor Nooroo has come to find you yet, things aren’t that bad, but I really need you to make sure he’s okay and convince him to return my call. Please?”

In the background, Luka heard a knock on, presumably, Adrien’s bedroom door and Gabriel’s voice informing Adrien that he was coming in.

“He’s here,” Gabriel spoke into the receiver. “I will talk to him, and he will either call you back or he will not. Good day, Monsieur Couffaine.”

“Thank you,” Luka sighed as the call ended.

He switched his phone off of silent and got out of bed, knowing he wouldn’t be able to fall back asleep until he knew Adrien was all right. He got dressed and brushed his teeth, reapplied his makeup, and was just about to head to the kitchen to see about breakfast when his phone rang.

Luka pounced. “Adrien?!”

“…Perhaps I overreacted to being reminded that you have a girlfriend.”

_“Whom I want to be my girlfriend”_ and _“who isn’t me”_ were left unsaid but highly suspected.

“Angel, I’m sorry. I’ve gotten, like, three hours of sleep,” Luka groveled. “If you’re lonely, I’ll be right over, but I’m going to need an IV drip filled with caffeine.”

“You must be sorry if you’re trotting out your old pet names for me,” Adrien chuckled, and there was the rustling of sheets as he rolled over on his bed. “But seriously. I’m sorry. I know that you’re not…that we’re…Marinette,” he sighed. “Okay. For-real-honesty time. You asked what was wrong? The reason I called you? I’ve been up for hours. I haven’t gone to sleep.”

“Adrien.”

“I called pretty much everyone while I was waiting for it to be at least a half-decent time to call you, but…” Adrien laughed ironically.

Luka sat back down on his bed. “Adrien, what’s wrong? What happened?”

“Last night…it was just something that someone said.” Adrien shook his head futilely. “It’s stupid. I should just shake it off.”

“Who said what to you?” Luka demanded, a hiss of fury building in the back of his throat. “I will personally rearrange their face.”

“You can’t,” Adrien chuckled. “Because she didn’t do anything wrong. Mylène was talking to Juleka, and I just happened to overhear because…well…you know. Cat hearing. She didn’t know I could hear her. Mylène’s a big teddy bear. She may be on Marinette’s side of this whole…kerfuffle, but she would never hurt me on purpose like that.”

“What did she say?” Luka ran a hand through his hair and down his face.

“‘Adrien sure is getting close with Marinette’s boyfriend’.”

Luka frowned. “And that upset you? Did she say it in a nasty tone of voice or something?”

“No, and that’s why you can’t confront her about it,” Adrien whined in frustration.

“Okay. Ariel, I’m confused. I’m sorry, but why did that upset you so much that you couldn’t sleep? I’m not saying your feelings are invalid, but…walk me through this, please.”

“It’s not the way she said it or what she said but what she felt when she said it,” Adrien whispered.

“…You were using Nooroo’s empathic abilities last night, weren’t you?” Luka realized. He tried to keep his desire to shake Adrien out of his voice.

Adrien remained silent.

“Adrien, you know that’s dangerous for you,” Luka sighed. “Please explain what you were thinking.”

“I was really nervous to be hanging out with everyone last night. I mean, no one’s mean to me, no one hates me or even dislikes me, but Juleka, Rose, Mylène, Ivan, Alya, Nino, Marinette, and you is not the most hospitable environment for me, and I’ve mentioned before that I feel weird being the only one without a date. I was nervous, so I thought if I dialed up Nooroo’s empathic abilities, I would be able to concentrate on everyone else’s emotions and drown out my own. Kind of like a mood stabilizer. I figured everyone else would be having fun, and then I’d be able to have fun and just…be normal for the first time in…in, like…all year. It’s really draining to be the depressed, obsessive, emotionally unstable friend all the time, so I thought…”

“Adrien, you’re not like that,” Luka stressed, voice gentle and comforting. “That’s not you at all.”

“Not when I’m with you,” Adrien chuckled. “When I’m with you, I’m a mess, but I’m the normal kind of fixable, not-that-big-a-deal mess. Is it any wonder I want to be with you all the time?”

“Adrien…” Luka breathed, his heart constricting.

“Luka,” Adrien echoed with a self-deprecating laugh. “…It was fine until Mylène said that to Juleka. It was working. I was having a good time, but then…Luka, just the disgusted contempt she felt…and then Juleka was anxious and angry, and I _felt_ it. I felt it as if the anger and contempt and disgust were mine, but they were feeling those things towards _me_, so I started feeling those things towards me, and I started thinking…what the hell am I doing? Like, what am I even doing here with you guys? I should go away. I should spend a year abroad in New York or London or somewhere where I can’t get myself into these ridiculous situations. No one wants me here anyway.”

“Adrien,” Luka pleaded. “Stop.”

“But then you came over,” Adrien continued. “And I kind of just latched on to how you were feeling—and I’m really sorry because it now occurs to me that that’s a kind of invasion of privacy—but it’s so easy to get lost in your emotions. It feels safe…. The way you feel about me is…”

Luka winced, feeling like he’d been caught red-handed.

“I love the way you feel about me. It makes me feel drunk without any of the consequences. It feels so good…until you start feeling guilty. Then I start feeling doubly guilty. I felt really guilty last night after I got home. And panicky. And lonely. I tried to sleep, but I couldn’t, and Plagg said I wasn’t allowed to take allergy meds to knock myself out because apparently it really scares my family when I do that.”

Adrien paused reflectively before asking, “Is this too much for nine o’clock in the morning? I’m sorry. I’m just ranting at you, aren’t I? Did I mention I haven’t slept? Maybe that has something to do with it. Chloé says I get ridiculous when I’m tired. Please say something and make me stop talking now.”

“I love you.”

Adrien blinked in bewilderment.

“Are you still there, or did I break you?”

“…I’m waiting for the ‘but’,” Adrien muttered. “‘I love you, but…’. Where’s the condition or the limitation?”

Luka shook his head. “There is no ‘but’. I just love you.”

“…And yet I don’t see you breaking up with your girlfriend,” Adrien mumbled.

“No. Because I’m in a committed relationship right now, and I love her too. You can love more than one person simultaneously, Adrien. You know that. Besides, you don’t need a boyfriend right now. You need to focus on you without having to worry about anybody else.”

“What if I want a boyfriend?” Adrien challenged petulantly.

“Okay. Maybe you want the perks of a boyfriend, but you don’t want the hard work and the disappointments and the sacrifices that come with a relationship,” Luka countered.

Adrien was silent for a moment. “…How do you know what I want?”

“I can see it in your eyes. I can feel it.” Luka shrugged. “You know what it’s like to be an empath now. I don’t suppose I’m anywhere near as sharp as Nooroo, but…I can feel that you just want affection and support. Life has been beating up on you all year, and you want someone to take care of you, not someone who’s going hurt you even more.”

“…Which one are you?” Adrien hummed.

“Don’t know yet,” Luka confessed. “I don’t want to be part of the problem, but…”

Adrien laughed. “There’s the ‘but’.”

“I’m coming over,” Luka decided. “I’m coming over, and we’re going to take a nap for a few hours. Then, we’re going to get up and eat something before promptly returning to bed for another hour or two. After that, we’ll see how we’re feeling and maybe go swimming. How does that sound?”

“Will there be snuggling involved, or do I have to keep my hands to myself?” Adrien asked tentatively.

“Platonic snuggling only,” Luka warned.

“Perfect,” Adrien chuckled, sounding genuinely happy for the first time the entire conversation.

“I’ll be over in, like, half an hour. I don’t think I trust myself on a motorcycle on three hours of sleep, so I’ll just walk,” Luka informed, hopping down from his bed.

“I actually already sent a car for you. My driver Victor should be out front by now.” Luka could hear the sheepish grin in Adrien’s voice.

He shook his head. “Thank you, Ariel.”

“Orpheus?”

“Hm?”

“Why do you put up with me?” Adrien wondered. “I only make your life complicated.”

Because I love you. Because you need me. Because you make me feel valued, appreciated, desirable, significant, strong…

“Because you’re worth it, Adrien. See you soon.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ugh. I don't know why this happened. I'm sorry. After I promised you fluff too. ^.^; This was supposed to be a super short, funny chapter where Adrien called Luka to come over and swim and made the joke about taking his clothes off. I don't where the rest of this came from.
> 
> I hope it was interesting? ^.^; Too heavy? Cathartic? Bittersweet? Thoughts?
> 
> Thanks for reading! I have two ideas that I want to write that should be more fluff, less angst. I'm going to go work on that now. I hope to see you soon.


	7. Appreciation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Marinette Situation has Luka feeling down, so Adrien picks up the slack.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! Another idea for a scene hit me, so here's an additional update this week. This is the fluff I promised.
> 
> A big thank you goes out to all of you reading this. Thank you for your comments and bookmarks and kudos. I'm so excited that there are so many people enjoying this, and I'm very grateful to you for your support. Enjoy!
> 
> This one takes place the summer after Phantasmagoria in June-ish (approximately three months after the end of Phan). Adrien is sixteen, and Luka is eighteen and a half.

At least Marinette appreciated his jokes, Adrien thought as he set up the Couffaines’ keyboard and made a masterful pun out of the multiple meanings of the word “key”. (As in a “key” concept, the “key” to a door, piano “keys”, and the “key” a piece of music was in.) Very ingenious, if he did say so himself.

Marinette seemed to think so too judging by the way she laughed uproariously.

Adrien had actually been granted permission to play with Kitty Section at that year’s Music Festival, so—for once—he hadn’t had to sneak out to come visit his second home, the Liberty. (He owed a huge thank you to Nathalie for grinding away at Gabriel until he agreed.)

Adrien was hard at work helping to set up the stage area, and Marinette had been right by his side the whole time, assisting with the heavy lifting (she was incredibly strong from moving flour sacks at the bakery), chatting with him, and, of course, laughing at his jokes.

It was a perfect day of spending time with friends…well…almost perfect.

Luka seemed to be in what Juleka described as “a mood”. He was being as antisocial as possible on the busy deck, and whenever Adrien went over to talk to him (Marinette on Adrien’s heels), Luka put on a fake smile, chatted for the minimal required time not to seem like he was avoiding Adrien, and then came up with some excuse to be somewhere else. Plus, every time Adrien looked, he spotted Luka quickly looking away, trying to cover up a hurt expression.

Adrien was determined to get to the bottom of this. If he had done something wrong to offend Luka or hurt Luka’s feelings, he was going to fix it. Luka was second only to Nino as the best friend that Adrien had ever had in all of his life, and Adrien was not going to let anything come between them.

After the keyboard was securely in place, Adrien turned to Marinette and smiled disarmingly. “I’m sorry to bail like this, but will you excuse me for a few minutes? I really need to ask Luka something in private, if you don’t mind.”

Marinette gave a start. “Oh! No. Of Norse caught—uh—course not,” she laughed, waving away his concern and nearly knocking over a mic stand in the process.

Adrien caught it before it could hit her and chuckled fondly, giving her a reassuring smile. “Be careful, Marinette. I would hate for you to get hurt.”

Marinette’s face glowed as she smiled dreamily. “Awww. You’re so sweet, Adrien. Thank you.”

Adrien laughed with a wink as he took his leave, heading for where Luka was working in the sound booth.

“Hey there, Orpheus,” Adrien purred, making Luka jump.

“Oh, hey, Perfect Fifth.” Luka looked up and smiled affectionately. “What’s up?”

“Can I borrow you for a sec? There’s something only you can do for me, and it can’t wait,” Adrien exaggerated. Desperate times and all that.

Concern flooded Luka’s face, and he removed the headset from around his neck. “Of course. What do you need?”

Adrien grinned and crooked a finger, turning to head below deck.

Luka followed obediently as Adrien led him to the living room and took a seat on the couch.

Adrien slipped off his shoes, tucking one leg underneath himself while he hugged the other to his chest. He patted the space on the couch next to him, and Luka took a seat.

“What’s wrong, P5?” Luka prompted.

“I was hoping you’d tell me,” Adrien confessed, wearing an oddly serious countenance. “It feels like you’ve been in ‘a mood’ all day. Are you mad at me? You’re acting like you don’t want to be around me. You keep making excuses to get away whenever we’re talking, and I keep catching sight of this wounded expression on your face. Orpheus, if I’ve done something to hurt you, please tell me so I can try to make it right. You mean too much to me for me to mess things up.”

“Oh, Adrien.” Luka winced, mentally kicking himself. “No, Angel. I’m so sorry. It’s not you.”

“If you say, ‘it’s me’, I’m going to hit you,” Adrien threatened dryly. “If you’re breaking up with me, I want a concrete list of grievances, not a load of clichés.”

A frown slowly stretched across Adrien’s brow. “Do friends have breakups?”

“They most certainly do, but that’s not what’s happening here,” Luka chuckled, mildly amused and mildly horrified at the mix up. “Adrien, who has been practically attached to your side all day?”

“Marinette?” Adrien looked expectantly to Luka for clarification on the relevance of this piece of information.

“Adrien, who am I really avoiding?” Luka prompted.

“Ooooh,” Adrien sang in a gliding melisma of realization. “Marinette. Oh, good—well, not _good_, but I’m happy that it’s just that you’re having one of your Marinette Days and not that you’re upset with something I did.”

“Sorry for the misunderstanding.” Luka grinned sheepishly, reaching out to give Adrien’s hair a customary tussle.

Adrien leaned into the touch. “…Are you okay?”

Luka shook his head. “Sorry. I know it’s stupid, but…when it’s just the two of us, she’s…it feels like she and I are a viable option…but then she just drops me as soon as someone else shows up, and it’s like…am I that cheap and replaceable?” Luka laughed.

It wasn’t a happy laugh.

Adrien frowned, letting his hand rest on Luka’s thigh.

“Am I only good enough to kill time with until someone better comes along? I mean, I realize that the guy she likes is…” Luka smiled sadly as he turned to gaze into Adrien’s eyes. “He’s a walking miracle. He’s sweet and kind and smart and brave. Even his flaws are perfection. I completely get why she’s crazy for him. I think I get it even better than she does, but the point is…” Luka sighed. “…What was my point? I got sidetracked with the gushing.”

“Marinette makes you feel unappreciated, like you’re not good enough,” Adrien muttered, hurting on his friend’s behalf. “And you have a masochistic crush on her crush, so you can understand why she doesn’t give you the attention and adoration you deserve.”

Luka pursed his lips, trying not to crack up. “Masochistic crush, huh? Well…maybe. …Good to know you’re not completely oblivious, just lacking in self-awareness.”

Adrien’s forehead scrunched up. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I adore you, P5,” Luka chuckled.

“So forget Marinette and her crush and marry me already.” Adrien shrugged. “I would never let you forget how amazing you are.”

Luka scooped up Adrien’s hand and whisked it to his lips for a kiss. “Adrien Agreste, are you proposing to me?”

Adrien frowned. “…This isn’t very romantic, is it? I should have hired a string sextet, and there should be flowers and candles. Can I have a redo?”

Luka rolled his eyes, squeezing Adrien’s hand before letting go. “Thank you for cheering me up. I know I shouldn’t let the Marinette Situation get to me because we’re not dating, and it’s not like she’s the only person in the world I could ever be happy with, but…seeing her with you today was like a double dose of misery. You two make a cute couple.”

“Marinette and me?” Adrien echoed incredulously. “But we’re not interested in each other like that.”

Luka shook his head. “Maybe not, but you two still look beautiful together, laughing and joking around. My Chanson and my Perfect Fifth… Today, it just…didn’t look like there was any room for _me_ in that equation, and it made me kind of melancholy.”

“Hey,” Adrien called, gently tugging on Luka’s sleeve. “There’s always room for you. Luka, you’re beyond amazing. You make things better just by existing. If Marinette can’t see what you’re worth, then, stellar as she is, she doesn’t deserve you. You are one of the most genuinely good human beings that I know, and your compassion and willingness to take care of others and meet them where they are is outstanding. I admire you so much, and I am grateful every day to be a recipient of your friendship. The fact that you’re not with someone who makes you feel loved and valued makes me heartsick. Your worth is beyond measure.”

Luka angled to face Adrien and closed his eyes, leaning in to rest his forehead on Adrien’s shoulder. “Thank you,” he finally managed to get out, voice thick with emotion.

Adrien wrapped an arm around Luka and patted his back soothingly. “…I know I’m not Marinette, but…I’d pick you. I know it’s not an exact comparison, and I know my opinion doesn’t have the same weight as hers, but…out of all the guys I know, if I had to pick one, it would be you.”

“Trust me, the sentiment is appreciated,” Luka assured into Adrien’s neck.

“I hope you find someone who makes you feel adored like you deserve,” Adrien whispered. “You’re so special, Orpheus.”

Luka hummed softly, reveling in the feel of Adrien’s hands, the warmth of his skin, and the tickle of his breath on Luka’s neck.

He didn’t tell Adrien that he had already found such a person and that it was only a matter of holding onto them and hoping one day for more than friendship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So if you haven't seen it yet, Buggy has made some GORGEOUS fan art for Chapter Four. Please go look at it and marvel at how perfect it is: https://pawsomelybuggy.tumblr.com/post/187943781939/mikauzoran-pawsomelybuggy-aah-this-is-from
> 
> There. How was that? Better? Or do you like the angst and drama? Which do you prefer? Fluff? Angst? A mix?
> 
> Seriously. What do you guys WANT to see? I don't really have concrete plans for this. This is just where I dump extras from Phan and Jabber, so if you have things that you're curious about that you'd like to see explained or if there's a certain scenario you'd like to see, feel free to shout it out. No guarantees, but this story is decidedly more unstructured than my linear stories with plots, so I have more wiggle room for reader input here.
> 
> So...no Jabberwocky update today. Sorry. -.-; I'll try to have it done soon (next Friday at the latest). I just got caught up with writing two Nachtmusik chapters and a two-shot called Let Your Walls Down this week, so I didn't get the Jabberwocky chapter done to satisfaction. Apologies.
> 
> Thank you for reading, guys. See you soon!


	8. Negotiations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Are we having this fight again?” Luka sighed.  
“Looks like it,” Adrien sang with false cheerfulness, nuzzling Luka’s collarbone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there! It's so good to see you again. Thank you to everyone reading this, and thank you to those of you who leave comments and kudos or bookmark the story. I hope you enjoy today's installment.
> 
> This chapter takes place during Jabberwocky in March when Adrien is just short of nineteen and Luka is twenty-one and a half. Marinette and Luka are not in a relationship, but neither are Luka and Adrien.

“St-Stop-p,” Luka cackled as he squirmed, trying to get away from Adrien’s hands as they tickled Luka’s sensitive sides. “Stop-stop-stop!”

“Beg,” Adrien whispered smugly, giving Luka’s ear a little nip as he pulled away to gaze down at Luka’s face.

“Please,” Luka panted breathlessly in the fleeting moment of ceasefire. “Please stop.”

“Hmm…” Adrien pretended to consider before giving his verdict. “No.” He smirked, fingers getting back to work tickling.

Luka gasped and jerked at the renewed onslaught. “Ple-ase,” he sang. “Stop. Stop. Stop!”

Adrien took hold of Luka’s hips and held them steady, dipping his head down to give Luka’s abs a lick.

“Sto—ah…stop. Don’t…stop,” Luka groaned as the tickling of fingers became long, drawn-out licks and gentle bites that didn’t tickle any less.

“Stooop,” Luka crooned plaintively as Adrien simultaneously skimmed his fingers along the skin from Luka’s hip to the bottom of his ribcage and nipped just below Luka’s bellybutton.

“Whoa. Stop. Stop,” Luka insisted as Adrien moved lower, trailing nips and licks until he reached the top of Luka’s jeans, taking the button in his teeth.

“No, for real, stop,” Luka gasped, beginning to panic. “Uh…—right. Red!”

In an instant, Adrien’s hands were off. He pulled away, sitting back on his heels and looking down in fear at Luka.

“I’m sorry! Are you okay?” Adrien began to fret, the predatory gleam of moments before completely gone from his eyes.

Luka nodded, pulling his shirt back down and closing his eyes as he attempted to catch his breath. He patted the space on the bed next to him.

Adrien laid down, sidling up cautiously to snuggle at Luka’s side. “Sorry,” he whispered.

Luka shook his head, eyes cracking open partially. “No, P5. You’re good,” he assured breathlessly. “…You did exactly what you were supposed to do…the second I said ‘red’.” He leaned in to give Adrien’s forehead a kiss as his breathing slowly evened out. “It’s my fault for forgetting the safeword for a minute there.”

“I should have—”

“—No,” Luka cut him off firmly. “I’d been screaming ‘stop’ for five minutes, not meaning it. How were you supposed to know when it started being for real?”

Adrien sighed in defeat, snuggling in closer. “So long as I didn’t do anything wrong and you’re okay, I guess.”

“We’re good,” Luka confirmed.

Adrien was quiet for a moment before deciding it was a good enough time to ask, “What happened?”

Luka gulped. “I can’t have your mouth that far south and not get worked up and start wanting more from this than you’re willing to give…and that’s torture. It stops being lighthearted, fun messing around and starts…” Luka shook his head. “It’s like leading me on.”

Adrien opened his mouth to argue, but Luka cut him off.

“—I know. We’ve talked about this ad nauseam. We both have a clear understanding of what…_this_…is and what it isn’t, but when you start acting like you’re going to rip my pants off with your teeth…I forget for a minute, and I start hoping, but then I remember, and it hurts all over again. I can’t do this. I shouldn’t be doing _any_ of this with you. I’m just…”

He covered his face with a hand. “…such a masochist.”

“You’re the one who’s doing this to yourself, not me,” Adrien muttered sullenly.

“Are we having this fight again?” Luka sighed.

“Looks like it,” Adrien sang with false cheerfulness, nuzzling Luka’s collarbone. “You know that I _want_ to want to have sex with you.”

“But you just don’t,” Luka groaned tipping his head back to give Adrien better access to his neck.

“You’re the one who’s making a big deal out of this. How many times have I said, ‘if it’s such a deal-breaker for you, let’s just have sex’? Hm? I have been more than flexible on the issue of my heterosexuality.” Adrien bit Luka’s neck with the intention to leave a mark.

Luka put a hand over his mouth, stifling a moan.

Adrien pulled the hand away, subbing in lips for teeth on Luka’s throat. “Come on, Orpheus. Sing for me.”

Luka obliged, back arching. He mumbled something.

Adrien lifted his head. “Hm?” His heart plummeted when he saw the hurt and the conflict and the beginnings of tears in Luka’s eyes. 

“Oh, Pretty _Boy_,” he cooed, hands going to cup Luka’s cheeks. “Shh. I’m sorry. I’m not blaming you—I didn’t _mean_ to blame you. I _don’t_ blame you…. I’m just frustrated. I want to be your boyfriend, and whenever I try to present solutions to the problems—_the_ problem, singular—that keeps what I want from becoming a reality, I feel like all you ever tell me is no. …I love you, Luka.” Adrien leaned in to rub his nose against Luka’s before pulling back to meet his eyes. “If you need sex in this relationship, I can do that for you…I think.” Adrien bit his lip, squirming a bit before he could keep himself from thinking about it too much. “I can at least try,” he sighed.

Luka shook his head. “You don’t want to.”

“I _want_ to want to,” Adrien whined, biting his lip hard to keep in a scream of frustration. “God, I wish I wanted to.”

Luka cringed. “Adrien, it would be like raping you. This isn’t about the physical act of sex. It’s not something I want to do while you close your eyes and endure it to humor me. I want to _make love_ to you. _With_ you. It’s a bonding thing, an emotional need as much as a physical one. This isn’t going to work.”

Adrien smiled, smoothing over the storm of emotions he was feeling inside with a mask. “Then this is all we get then.”

He leaned in for a kiss, short, sweet.

His cheerful tone turned bitter. “Friends with benefits…until you find someone else able to satisfy all of your needs.”

Another kiss, deeper, sloppy.

His bitterness dropped away into cold anxiety. “…Is there anyone else who’s caught your eye?”

“No,” Luka whispered, touching his nose to Adrien’s.

How could Luka admit that he hadn’t really been looking? That when he did, none of the girls measured up to Marinette and none of the boys could hope to match Adrien?

“…It’s not just me that’s the problem,” Luka muttered miserably. “You’re not asexual, Adrien; you’re just not bisexual. One of these days, you’re going to want to sleep with a woman, and you’re going to leave me, and I’m not going to recover. I don’t hate myself. Why would I sign up for that?”

Adrien snorted. “Do you really think so little of me?”

Luka shook his head slowly, tears building again. “No…but you left me once already.”

Bile and shame welled up inside Adrien. “That was my father’s fault—he…” Adrien spluttered and choked before falling silent. “…I was sixteen and stupid and uncertain of my feelings—of _your_ feelings—and scared. I said I was sorry. You said you forgave me, that you understood.”

Luka nodded. “I did. Forgiving and forgetting are two different things.”

Adrien sighed, dropping down to the bed beside Luka, letting his head rest barely brushing Luka’s shoulder.

“Angel?”

“Hm?” Adrien responded half-heartedly.

“I love you so much.” Luka’s voice held a quiet desperation, like he wanted to pull Adrien into his chest and never let him go.

Adrien turned his head, pressing a kiss to Luka’s shoulder. He pulled up the sleeve of Luka’s t-shirt and pressed his lips against skin. “…You know, I’m going to be nineteen in a month…and I’ve only ever wanted to sleep with one person.”

“And she doesn’t want either of us,” Luka hummed bitterly.

Adrien hummed back. “…Maybe I don’t need sex as much as you seem to think I do. Maybe we could—”

“—Shh. Perfect Fifth. No,” Luka whispered gently, his fingers finding Adrien’s and threading through them. “No more tonight. I don’t want to fight with you.”

Adrien brought their joined hands to his lips to chew softly on Luka’s fingers.

After a thoughtful silence, he asked, “Do you know what today is?” in as non-consequential a manner as he could.

Luka tensed. “…The anniversary of your mother’s disappearance.”

Adrien froze for a second in surprise. He propped himself up on his elbows and gazed down at Luka in a mixed of pleasure, astonishment, and appreciation. “You remembered.”

“It’s important to you.” Luka shrugged.

“It’s important for other reasons,” Adrien chuckled, eyes flickering away for a second as a cherry blossom blush colored his cheeks. He chewed on his lips nervously, and then his gaze was back on Luka. “Do you know what else today is?”

Only one other thing came to mind, but Luka didn’t want to risk admitting that every year when he looked at the calendar he remembered running into a lost, devastated, sixteen-year-old Adrien at a bar where Luka had been performing and the night they’d had together…the spring they’d shared…the summer they’d spent side by side…nearly six months of being deliriously in love with Adrien Agreste.

“It’s our anniversary,” Adrien whispered, blush intensifying.

Luka’s eyes widened as Adrien’s words floored him.

Adrien backpedaled. “I mean, that’s kind of how I always thought of it. I guess it’s a little presumptuous of me, but—”

“—No,” Luka interrupted, coming out of his shocked state. “I mean, I do too.”

Adrien blinked, cheeks going from crimson to bubble gum.

“Every year I think of you,” Luka breathed. “…I’m so grateful to have you back in my life.”

“The feeling’s mutual,” Adrien purred. “…Go out with me. For real. We can figure this out as we go along, but go out with me. Be mine,” he begged. “Let’s make today our official anniversary.”

It was so tempting, but…

“Don’t overthink this. Just say yes,” Adrien pleaded. “I don’t want to be your friend with benefits anymore. I want to be in a relationship with you that has a future.”

But…

“_Luka_,” Adrien breathed.

It sounded too good to be true…which meant that it probably was.

“I don’t know,” he answered honestly.

Adrien groaned in defeat. “That means no.”

“I’ll think about it. Really think about it,” Luka promised, knowing in his heart that there would never be another man. Adrien was his perfect fifth. What was the point of looking elsewhere?

“That means no,” Adrien pouted.

“Angel,” Luka cajoled.

“No. I’m pouting,” Adrien protested. “You just rejected me. I’m hurt.”

Luka couldn’t help but smile at Adrien’s exaggeration. “Want me to lick your wounds?”

Adrien pretended to think about it. “Fine.” He rolled over into his back so that Luka could climb on top of him. He bared his neck.

They’d learned by trial and error that that position allowed for Adrien to squirm fairly freely with less of a chance of accidentally putting pressure somewhere that would make Luka uncomfortable.

“Orpheus?”

“Hm?”

Adrien gazed up, eyes half-lidded. “Get me drunk.” He pressed a butterfly kiss to Luka’s lips. “Kiss me until I forget everything but you.”

Luka groaned, dropping his head to nuzzle Adrien’s neck. “You turn me into a sloppy mess. Are you trying to punish me?”

“No,” Adrien hummed against Luka’s shoulder. “I’m breaking you. Go out with me.”

Luka bit Adrien’s throat hard, making Adrien jump, a high-pitched yelp escaping his lips. Luka gave the bite mark a lick and chuckled, “Now it’s your turn to sing for me, Angel,” before proceeding to suck greedily at the spot.

Adrien happily began to purr.

No more talking, no more arguments. Kisses and caresses and laughter and gasps as they lost themselves in one another. An hour or two later, they drifted off to sleep with the taste of the other’s lips on their tongues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts? Parts you liked? Parts you didn't?
> 
> I wonder if Adrien's position is confusing for some people. You may be thinking "If Adrien loves Luka, why isn't he interested in sex?" Perhaps this is difficult to understand. Perhaps you think this is unrealistic. I don't think I know anyone who's biromantic heterosexual in real life, but, in my own experience, I've never met anyone that I wanted to sleep with before. I enjoy snuggling and making out with people I'm in a relationship with, and I've fallen in love before, but the idea of sleeping with anyone is just gross. Not interested. Perhaps this is too much information, but I kind of wanted to explain Adrien's situation with concrete, real-world examples, so there you go. 
> 
> I think in the show Adrien seems at least bi-curious, so I kind of wanted to experiment with that in the Daisy/Jabberwocky universe, and he ended up biromantic heterosexual. Perhaps some of you are upset because I seem to have written the Lukadrien pairing into a corner. ^.^; No worries. They do work things out and end up together in Jabberwocky, and then Marinette gets added in later too. I was actually thinking it would be an interesting challenge to write a one- or two-shot detailing how Luka and Adrien negotiate and transition into a sexual relationship. This would be much later after the bulk of Jabberwocky is written. I don't really write smut. I don't really care for it much, but that's part of the reason why I think it would be an interesting challenge to see if I could pull it off. It might completely crash and burn, but...I don't know. Would anyone be interested in reading some Lukadrien smut in a few months? ^.^;
> 
> Anyway. Thank you for reading. I hope to see you guys again soon!


	9. Eurydice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Papillon picks the wrong target.  
Luka picks himself back up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! Welcome back for another installment of Nachtmusik. Thank you so much for all of your comments and bookmarks and kudos! I've had the idea for the first part of this chapter for a while, but last night I sat down to finally write it, and the second half serendipitously happened too, so now the chapter isn't as harsh and depressing. I probably should have spent more time editing, but I'm happy enough with this.
> 
> This takes place after Chapter Four of Jabberwocky, but there aren't any spoilers. I mean...even if you've only been reading Nachtmusik, if you've gotten this far, you already know that at some point Luka and Adrien were torn apart by Gabriel, so...read on. Adrien is sixteen and a half, and Luka is nineteen.
> 
> Warnings because Luka is not in a good place mentally in this one, but it improves and gets fluffy by the end? ^.^; I hope you find it interesting.

“Orpheus,” a cajoling voice echoed in his head. He had heard that voice before.

Part of him knew he had to fight it otherwise he might end up hurting Chat Noir—_Adrien_—as Adrien fought to protect Ladybug.

Luka didn’t want to fight. He was tired. He was heartbroken. Most of all, he felt helpless. Luka didn’t want to fight the pull. Luka wanted the power to fix things.

When Luka had been akumatized before, it had drawn attention to the problem, exposed the real villains, and prompted justice to be served. Maybe, if he were akumatized again, even if Ladybug saved the day and stopped Luka, the incident would expose Gabriel Agreste and end up reunited Luka and Adrien anyway.

Luka stopped fighting.

“Orpheus,” Papillon cooed. “I am Le Papillon. You’ve lost the one you love. He’s been unfairly and untimely torn away from you, and I know you’d do anything, even go down into the underworld, to get him back. I can grant you the power you need. I can return the boy you love to you. In exchange, I need you to get Ladybug and Chat Noir’s Miraculouses. Do we have a deal?”

“You’ve read me wrong, Papillon,” Orpheus hummed, pushing the whiskey bottle away and strumming at the guitar in his lap.

“Have I?” the villain sounded intrigued.

Orpheus nodded. “It’s not enough to go and rescue Adrien from that prison of a room his father keeps him in. So long as his father lives, Adrien will never be safe. We’ll never be free to be happy. I don’t just want to rescue Adrien temporarily. I want Gabriel Agreste dead so that he can never hurt Adrien ever again. I need your help, Papillon. Give me the power to kill Gabriel Agreste, and I will bring you Ladybug’s earrings.”

There was a long stretch of silence, and Orpheus felt the connection weakening.

“Your head is a very dark place,” Papillon observed, sounding slightly stunned. “Don’t you think murder is a bit extreme?”

“It’s not murder if you kill someone while akumatized,” Orpheus reasoned. “They would never convict me. Besides, ridding this world of Gabriel Agreste isn’t murder. He’s not a human being. It’s more like exterminating a pest.”

Papillon fell silent once more.

“You’ve killed before, Papillon,” Orpheus wheedled. “You’ve drowned and frozen hundreds of people at a time before. Your akuma have destroyed buildings with people inside, flattened cars, vanished people out of existence. You’ve killed hundreds before. Why is the death of one specific person making you squeamish?”

“You’ve thought about this a great deal,” Papillon replied carefully, beginning to realize his mistake in his choice of target.

“Adrien is all I think about,” Orpheus stressed. “If I could set him free, make him happy…I would gladly go to Hades and burn for him.”

The akuma left the guitar and escaped out the porthole window.

Luka came back to himself with a violent jerk. He felt physically ill and just barely made it into the bathroom in time to disgorge the contents of his stomach into the toilet. Afterwards, he sat curled up on the cold tile floor trembling at the thought of what he had almost done.

Luka needed to get himself together. He needed to pick himself up and get healthy before he did something unforgiveable and became someone unrecognizable both to himself and to Adrien.

He got to his feet and got together all the alcohol he had stashed in his room. After he finished dumping it and recycling the bottles, he set about fitting the family liquor cabinet out in the main cabin with a lock.

Luka next headed for Juleka’s room, lightly knocking on the door and waiting for a minute before pushing it open.

Juleka was asleep in bed, and it looked like Rose was sleeping in her own room that night because Juleka was alone.

Luka padded over quietly and gently nudged his little sister awake. “Juliet? Can you wake up for a second please? Just a second, and then you can go right back to bed.”

“Luc?” she muttered drowsily, rolling over to glance at her bedside table clock. “It’s three in the morning. What happened? What’s wrong?” She sleepily pushed herself up to sitting and blinked at him through the darkness.

“Almost got akumatized,” Luka sighed.

Juleka cursed, suddenly wide awake, her hands going to his arm, his face, his hair. She cursed again. “Are you okay?”

He shook his head before setting it down on her shoulder. “I don’t want to talk about it. Too awful.”

She held him tighter. “God,” she breathed and lost her filter in her panicked, sleep-deprived state, “Look at what he’s done to you.”

“Jules, this isn’t his fault,” Luka muttered.

Juleka snorted.

“It’s his father’s,” Luka repeated for what must have been the hundredth time. “And mine,” he added knowingly.

“You?” Juleka spit incredulously, pulling back to look down at him.

Luka nodded. “I’ve allowed myself to get this bad. I’m the one not even trying to get better.”

“Stop being such a freaking saint all the time,” Juleka retorted, a bit of her anger and frustration leaking out.

Luka smiled, raising his head and holding out the key to the lock he’d put on the liquor cabinet. “I’ve decided it’s time to get better, and I need your help. I threw out all the alcohol I had in my room and locked up the supply in the common area. I need you to take this key and keep it hidden from me.”

Juleka slipped the key into her nightstand drawer and wrapped her arms back around him. “I’ll hide it better tomorrow. For now, you’re on the honor system not to steal it out of my drawer. I’ve got personal stuff in there. Rooting around in there would be an invasion of my privacy. Okay?”

He gave her a grateful squeeze. “You’re the best.”

“I’m trying,” she sighed. “At least until you’re back in commission. Normally being the best is your job.”

A pained smile flickered onto his lips. “I’m working on it.”

They pulled away, and he got up to go. “Thanks, Jules. Sorry for waking you up.”

“Hey,” she called after him. “What were you still doing up so late?”

He shrugged, pausing to lean on her doorjamb. “Drinking…wallowing…playing pathetic, heartbroken, lovesick songs about Adrien.”

“Are you going to sleep now?” she pressed.

He bit his lip. “Maybe. I don’t know. It’s hard to sleep. My bed…this is going to sound ludicrous, but my tiny bed is too big.”

Juleka’s eyes widened in understanding. “Luc…go grab your blankets and your pillow. Come sleep in here.”

Luka frowned. “Aren’t we a little old for sleepovers?”

Juleka rolled her eyes and shook her head. “No. Sleepovers aren’t something you ever really outgrow. Now, go get your stuff. Come on. I think I’m about to have a panic attack. I’m afraid of sleeping in here by myself. I need you to come stay with me.”

Luka hid his face behind a hand as he laughed, overwhelmed by his emotions. Gratitude, embarrassment, and warmth flowed through him. He said a silent thank you to the universe for giving him a sister.

“Okay. When you put it that way, let me go get my stuff. I’ll be right in…. Thank you so much, Juleka,” he called back over his shoulder.

Luka set up his pillow at the foot of Juleka’s bed and huddled up under his own covers, still stained with nail polish from when Luka had painted Adrien’s toes on that final day.

Unsurprisingly, Luka found it easier to sleep with another body in the bed with him. It wasn’t the same as cuddling with Adrien, but just having the extra warmth from his sister beside him, just being able to hear another person breathing and rolling about made the night more bearable.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm glad I was inspired to do the sibling fluff at the end. It really makes me feel better about the rest.
> 
> You know, I'm ashamed to admit that it took me, like, five whole minutes of thinking about what Luka's akuma name would be in this instance before it occurred to me, "Duh! It can only be Orpheus! It's both completely fitting and totally ironic in a really cruel, distinctly Gabriel-flavoured way".
> 
> Did you like it? Too dark? I feel bad for poor Luka. He's hurting so much. It gets better? ^.^;
> 
> I hope it was interesting. Thanks for reading everyone!
> 
> Fun randomness: So, I was wondering how many words I've posted for the Ladybug fandom because it was the nine-month anniversary of me posting the first chapter of my first Ladybug story on Friday 10/11/2019, and I added up all the totals for my stories thus far. Before I posted this chapter, my total was at 498,560. This chapter is 1,314 words according to the counting system in Word. That brings me up to 499,874. That means I've posted an average of 55,542 words per month these past nine months. I'm one hundred and twenty-six words short of the 500,000 mark. When I post Chapter Four of Jabberwocky on Friday, I'll have surpassed 500k posted in the Ladybug fandom this year. I'm really quite pleased to be reaching this milestone. Many thanks to those of you who have read every word, some of the words, or most of the words. It's been such a pleasure.


	10. The ACDC Residence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ten years later at the ACDC residence...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! I'm super depressed. Like, I wasn't doing well for a week, and then I watched the episodes, and now I'm in a funk. I need ALL the fluff. Stat. 
> 
> Ahem. Anyway. Thanks so much for joining me for another installment of Nachtmusik. Thank you all for your bookmarks and comments and kudos from last chapter! I'm really enjoying this timeline survey fic, and I'm glad that you're having fun with it too.
> 
> So, Monday, IndigoPari requested Lukadrienette fluff. Ask and you shall receive. I've had this scene in my head for a while, so I decided to finally write it out. I didn't intend for it to be six thousand words, but...well, you know me. I never intend for anything to be as long as it turns out, but...I hope you enjoy this look at the ACDC family and their dynamics. (Seeing as I wrote this all a little quickly, I'm sure I've missed typos. Apologies in advance.)
> 
> I haven't seen the entirety of the musical Next to Normal because it's too heavy and intense for me, but I think it's really interesting, and I'm glad it exists even though I don't think I really like what I've seen of it. Warnings for spoilers for Next to Normal.
> 
> This takes place about ten years after Jabberwocky in the fall when Adrien and Marinette are twenty-eight and Luka is just short of thirty. Hugo is four. Emma is two. Louis hasn't been born yet.

Adrien was ready to pass out.

…After he scrubbed the rest of the stage makeup off.

Luka and Marinette would fuss if he got the stuff on the sheets (on _them_ and their clothes and the pillows) again, so first he’d take a shower, and then he would crawl into bed between his husband and his wife, and Adrien would pass out.

He opened the front door of their house in the sixteenth arrondissement as quietly as possible, gently pushing it open as he debated whether or not he wanted to risk waking Hugo and Emma by sneaking into their rooms to check on them and give them kisses. Hugo was such a light sleeper, and Emma had been sick when Adrien left that morning. If he woke Hugo up, Hugo would want to cuddle. Ditto with Emma, and he was sure they were both in need of the rest.

Adrien slowly pulled the door closed behind him, only letting go of the knob when the door was flush to avoid making noise.

He needn’t have bothered.

Once inside, he heard the soft and steady sounds of [Chopin’s Raindrop Prelude](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sh03YXzvDF4) emanating from the front room off to the left of the foyer. The piece was just getting to the deep, rumbly thunder part low in the register that made Adrien shiver in pleasure.

It had to be Luka playing, as Hugo’s little hands couldn’t span an octave yet.

Sure enough, when Adrien peeked around the corner, he found his husband at the piano, their two-year-old daughter in her sling, her head resting above Luka’s heart.

“Hey, Orpheus,” he called softly as he made his way over to his family.

Luka looked up, eyes filled with exhaustion, but when they met Adrien’s, they lit up with renewed energy. “Hey, Perfect Fifth. Welcome home.”

In one fluid motion, Adrien sat on the bench beside Luka and leaned in for a kiss. He could feel Luka smiling into it even as Luka’s fingers still found the right notes on the keyboard.

“Why Chopin?” Adrien chuckled against Luka’s lips before gently nipping and pulling back slightly. “Isn’t that kind of _my_ thing? Why not Ravel?” He carefully reached down and tucked a loose strand of thick, obsidian hair behind Emma’s ear.

Luka’s smile turned pained. “_Because_ Chopin is your thing.” He tipped his chin down at Emma sleeping fitfully, eyes cracking open only to slip closed once more.

“She’s been calling for you all day, Adrien-bocchama,” Nooroo informed, fidgeting nervously as he came to settle in his customary spot on Adrien’s right shoulder.

Adrien gave the butterfly kwami an affectionate scritch under the chin.

“I got her to settle for ‘Daddy’s music’ until you got home,” Luka explained with a weary sigh.

Adrien gave Luka’s ear a nibble. “How’s Hugo?”

Luka took a deep, tired breath. “…Hugo should be back to sleep by now, but he’s already been down here twice fussing over Emmie and asking why Chopin’s always crying in his songs. He said it sounds like ‘Chopin lost something he loved a whole lot’, so we had to talk about how Chopin was sick and lonely and heartbroken. The whole time I was thinking, ‘What four-year-old talks and thinks like this?’”

Adrien rested his chin on Luka’s shoulder as he hummed, “I bet _you_ did.”

Luka rolled his eyes fondly at his husband. “Not even _I_ was that spooky-perceptive that young. I may be considerably empathic, but Hugo looks at you with those big, blue eyes, and he sees into your soul.”

“He would be a good Butterfly Miraculous user,” Nooroo noted, nodding in satisfaction. “I feel a deep affinity with him.”

Luka winced. “Please keep the arcane magic away from our four-year-old. He’s enough of a handful as it is without the ability to create an army. I don’t want him turning out like his grandfath—er…uh…” He turned his head to smile apologetically at Adrien. “Sorry. No offence.”

Adrien shrugged, sitting up straight. “My father has the capacity to be both a very good and a very bad man. I’m proud of him for choosing to fight his inner demons, and I’m grateful that he’s winning. I love my father, but I’m about as eager as you are for our son to take after him. At least Hugo has genetics on his side.”

Luka winced again. “So if he turns out like Gabriel, it’s nurture. If he turns out like _my_ father, it’s nature, and that’s on me and my inferior genes. Thank you, Angel.”

“Any time,” Adrien snickered, giving his husband’s cheek a lick.

Luka tried not to laugh as he ended the Chopin piece on a satisfying closed cadence. “Come here,” he whispered, voice husky and completely enamored as he cupped Adrien’s face, running his thumb tenderly over Adrien’s cheek as he took Adrien’s lips in a deep, unhurried kiss.

The music lapsed, and, with a muted whine, Emma starting to blink sleepily into wakefulness, startling her parents apart with her quiet yet pained cries.

In a flash, Plagg flew out of Adrien’s left shoulder and down to check on his grandkitten. “Hey, Minette,” he purred, rubbing against her cheek.

“Blague,” Emma burbled as Plagg phased through her and came out the other side.

“She’s still hot,” Plagg observed. “I’m intimately familiar with what the internal temperature of a human being is supposed to feel like, and she’s too hot.”

“Her fever hasn’t broken yet?” Adrien gasped, suddenly going cold. He looked to Luka in wide-eyed panic. “Marinette said she was doing better when I called between shows.”

“She is, but she’s still running a temperature. It’s not super high, but…it doesn’t seem to be breaking, so I’m starting to get a little worried. I was waiting for you to get home to decide whether we should take her to the hospital.”

Adrien shook his head. “I’ll ring up one of the doctors Dad has on call and have them come. It’ll be easier than trying to take her out in the cold.”

Luka nodded slowly. “I always forget that we’re rich and can do things like that. I don’t know how I feel about relying on your father, though.”

Adrien waved away Luka’s reservations, already dialing the doctor on call and getting up to pace. “Dad knows she’s sick. When he calls me tomorrow morning, he’s going to ask how she is, and if she’s not better and I haven’t called one of his doctors, he’s going to freak.”

Luka put up his hands in surrender, familiar with how fanatically Gabriel Agreste doted on Hugo and Emma.

“Papá, piano,” Emma whimpered, reclaiming Luka’s attention.

Tears were beginning to form in the corners of her eyes, so he gently wiped them away before obliging her entreaty.

Luka pressed down on the mute pedal as he began [Chopin’s Spring Waltz](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a0hFZPvanMs) so that Emma could still hear the song but the playing wouldn’t disrupt Adrien’s phone call.

“Thirty to forty minutes depending on traffic, he said,” Adrien reported a minute later, coming back to sit on the bench beside his husband.

Luka smiled wryly. “Seeing as it’s just past one in the morning, I don’t imagine traffic will significantly impact arrival time.”

“Daddy!” Emma called, beginning to struggle. “Papá, down,” she pleaded. “Daddy!”

“Just a sec, Minuet.” Luka stopped playing to loose their daughter from the sling.

“Hey, Angel-Baby,” Adrien cooed, taking the carrier and child from Luka and fitting her to his own body so that she rested snug against his chest. “You not feeling so good?”

Emma made a little grumble, large green eyes staring up distractedly into his own.

Adrien dropped a gentle kiss to his daughter’s forehead and nuzzled her hair, wrapping his arms around her and patting her back. “Hang in there, My Sweet One.”

All the while, Luka looked on with a besotted grin.

Adrien glanced up, caught his husband staring, and quirked an inquisitive eyebrow. “What?”

Luka shook his head, reaching out to run a hand through Adrien’s hair. “You’re so incredibly beautiful; I can’t believe you’re real.”

Adrien laughed in delight, catching himself by surprise. A delicate rose blush spread like spilled ink across his cheeks. “You’ve been married to me for how long?”

“Four years, eleven months exactly now that we’re past midnight,” Luka decreed, immeasurably pleased with himself. “And I thank the powers that be for every hour.”

Adrien gave Luka a warm, soft look. “You and me both.”

Luka leaned in to nuzzle Adrien’s ear. “You holding our daughter ties for second place as my all-time favourite sight.”

“What’s first place?” Adrien wondered.

Luka didn’t even have to think about it. “You and Marinette holding both of our children. No contest.”

“You’re so sappy,” Adrien purred. “I _love_ it. You turn my insides to mush…. You know, when Marinette finally kicks this stomach bug, we should seriously discuss making more babies.”

Luka hummed in amusement, running his hand down Adrien’s neck and back up to rub behind his ear. “You’re already ready for another one?”

“It’s been two _years_,” Adrien whined, nuzzling Emma’s hair. “…Speaking of our lovely wife, how was Marinette today? Like I said, I called her between shows to check on her and Emmie, but she was really evasive.”

“I’m beginning to think she’s not really sick,” Luka confessed.

Adrien gave him an odd look. “She’s been throwing up for a week. How is she not sick?”

An impish smile unfurled on Luka’s lips, and an excited glint came into his eyes. “You’re out of tofu.”

Adrien frowned, even more confused. “I had half a block left after I made my tofu scramble this morning. How am I out of tofu? No one else eats it.”

“After Marinette finished throwing up this afternoon, she announced that she had the strangest craving for _tofu_ and _rose jam_.”

Adrien’s eye flew wide. “You think we’re pregnant,” he gasped.

Luka shrugged. “Only Marinette would know for sure, but…I am seeing similarities between this and the other pregnancies.”

Adrien had to restrain himself from tackling Luka or leaping for joy so that he wouldn’t jostle Emma. “I can’t believe it,” he breathed, leaning in and resting his forehead and nose against Luka’s shoulder.

“Please don’t get too excited yet, P5,” Luka begged, beginning to regret telling Adrien. “Please don’t get your hopes up too much until it’s confirmed and the doctor says we’re out of the woods. I don’t want you hurt, and you know how torn up you were after…” Luka bit his lip.

Adrien nodded. “…the miscarriage,” he completed in a whisper, nuzzling Luka’s arm and holding Emma closer. “I know. I’ll calm down,” he promised. “But…a baby,” he giggled. “Even the possibility of a baby is just so…” He looked up and shook his head, grinning. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Luka whispered against Adrien’s lips, taking a long pull from them.

“You should head to bed,” Adrien suggested as they pulled away. “I’ll sit up with Emmie; you’ve had her all day while I was gone and Marinette was sick.”

Luka shook his head. “Adrien, didn’t you have a matinée on top of an evening performance? You must be exhausted.”

Adrien shrugged, downplaying his fatigue. “My understudy is filling in tomorrow; I have the day off, so I can sleep then. You, on the other hand, need to go to bed. Don’t you have some kind of concert tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow _night_,” Luka countered. “I can sleep all day tomorrow once our daughter is doing better.”

Adrien rolled his eyes at the stubbornness of his spouse. Figuring it wouldn’t do much good to argue, Adrien shrugged. “You know best.”

“Finally he admits it,” Luka snorted, but his smile was all fondness and teasing.

“So…I’m horrible, but remind me of what kind of concert exactly you have tomorrow?” Adrien asked sheepishly. “Are you a rock star or a piano soloist or in with the first violins? You’re too talented. I can’t keep up.”

Luka shrugged and wrapped an arm around Adrien, thumb rhythmically stroking the top of Adrien’s shoulder as Luka tipped his head to rest against his husband’s. “I’m performing with the symphony tomorrow—just one violinist among thirty—so it won’t be as bad if I’m a little tired. The band has shows on Thursday and Friday. Next Saturday and Sunday I’m soloist for Beethoven’s Third Piano Concerto. Don’t worry about not being able to keep it straight…. I’m a little embarrassed to admit that I can’t remember what show you’re in right now. Are you…Raoul in Phantom of the Opera?”

Adrien chuckled, shaking his head as he smoothed Emma’s hair. “That’s next month; we’re in rehearsals, so that’s what you’re thinking of. Right now, I’ve got one more week left of playing Gabriel in Next to Normal.”

Luka nodded, licking his bottom lip. “That’s right…. Isn’t that…a challenging role for you? Maybe a little taxing emotionally?” he carefully inquired. “I remember being a bit nervous when you were telling me about the part.”

Adrien hummed thoughtfully. “…Yeah. Yeah, it is a difficult, draining role. I’m glad it was only for a month. I mean…I play the manifestation of the main character’s dead son and spend the whole musical feeding my ‘mother’’s mental illness, at one point encouraging her to join me in death, and constantly taunting my insecure ‘sister’ and being denied and dismissed by my ‘father’. It’s tough to be in that headspace, but…in the end, each of the characters reaches a sort of closure, and when my ‘father’ finally looks at me and acknowledges me…when he looks at me and says, ‘Gabe…. Gabriel?’, and I smile and say, ‘Hi, Dad’…it’s a good feeling. The whole show I feel like I’m working up to [that scene](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AZykalGde4A), and that scene makes the rest of it okay.”

Adrien turned his head so that they were face to face and smiled self-consciously. “Does that make any kind of sense? It’s okay if it doesn’t.”

Luka considered for a minute and then nodded. “In a way, yes. I have songs that I wrote about painful things. It stings and throbs and itches when I play them, but when I hit that final note…there’s resolution there. It’s cathartic. Now, I don’t know if I could make it through a two-hour musical experience like that, but…I kind of get what you’re saying.”

Adrien hummed, satisfied. “…It’s different now than it was a decade ago. I wouldn’t have been able to play Gabriel when I was eighteen. Now, it’s okay because the wounds have scabbed over a bit. My relationship with my dad is…I mean, we _have_ a relationship. It’s not perfect, but it’s good. It’s strong. He’s hurt me, and there are things that are difficult to forgive him for that still kind of hang between us, but I’m mostly at peace with my dad. And I finally have closure about my mom.”

Luka tightened his hold on Adrien.

“Just knowing that she’s dead and that she didn’t abandon me…that’s a huge weight off. There’s still a lot of pain there, but it’s better than the decade I spent thinking not even my mother loved me.” Adrien smiled sadly at his husband. “It’s also different because I have my own family now. You and Marinette…with you two beside me, I don’t have to be afraid of anything. I know you two will always catch me if I fall. We had a bit of a bumpy start, but we fell into place, and now we’re unshakeable. And our kids…”

Adrien looked down at Emma, and his heart swelled. “This is pure, untainted, uncomplicated love. Having kids of my own with the two people I love most in the universe has given me all kinds of closure and a new perspective on my relationships with my own parents. I couldn’t have played Gabriel ten years ago, but now…with my family, our home…it’s a healing experience more than reopening old wounds.”

“Yeah,” Luka whispered, kissing the side of Adrien’s head. “Yeah. I know what you mean. These past five years…our marriage, our children…even though there have been dark times, these past five years have done a lot to heal the wounds inside of me.”

“Blague?” Emma called as she came into wakefulness once more.

Plagg was hovering at her side in a heartbeat. “Yes, Minette?”

“Purr?” she entreated, turning her big, peridot baby eyes on him.

Plagg nestled up against Emma on Adrien’s chest and started a gentle, comforting purr.

“Plagg, you’re so whipped,” Adrien snickered.

Plagg gave a little snort but kept purring. “It’s been a long time since one of my kittens had kittens. This is special, Kid. Precious.”

“Yeah,” Adrien sighed contentedly, raising a finger to scratch between Plagg’s ears.

“Daddy?” Emma called, eyes glassy with fever.

Adrien’s ears perked up. “Yeah, Angel-Baby? What is it?”

“Piano?” she mewed interrogatively.

“Looks like she’s tired of hearing me play,” Luka chuckled, giving Adrien’s arm a pat before scooting over on the bench to give Adrien better access to the instrument.

“You _have_ been playing for several hours,” Nooroo reasoned, poking his head out of Adrien’s right shoulder to gaze down at Plagg and Emma. “Poor baby.”

“What do you want to hear Daddy play, Emmie?” Adrien inquired as he warmed up with some scales.

“Papá song,” she answered sleepily.

Adrien and Luka looked at each other, raising eyebrows in tandem.

“Ravel?” Adrien guessed.

Emma made a little hum of assent. “Woof,” she specified.

Luka and Adrien traded glances.

“I believe she means _barque_,” Nooroo translated.

Adrien and Luka nodded, sharing an, “Ooooh” of elucidation.

“[Miroirs Three: Une Barque sur l’Ocean](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5O5wMctUSAM),” Adrien announced and began to play a series of shimmering, rolling notes: sails billowing in the soft breeze, seagulls calling in the distance, waves gently lapping at the side of the boat, the sun shining down in a bright, even shower of tangible warmth.

Emma’s eyes slipped closed two minutes in, and she quickly fell back to sleep.

Adrien kept playing with a soft smile.

Luka was content just to watch and treasure the moment.

“You know,” Adrien chuckled quietly. “I was talking to the people in charge of marketing and programs for the production of Phantom of the Opera I’m going to be in, and I managed to convince them of the efficacy of crediting me as ‘Adrien ACDC’.”

Luka cracked up. “You didn’t.”

“Oh, I did,” Adrien snickered. “Didn’t I tell you I would? They were a little reluctant to lose the ‘Agreste’ because of name recognition, but I reasoned with them that it was a ridiculous amount of space on the line, not to mention the ink, to print ‘Adrien Agreste-Couffaine-Dupain-Cheng’. They suggested just going by my maiden name, so _I_ told _them_ that those three other names were a hard-won battle that I shed blood, sweat, and tears for and that I wasn’t giving them up without a full-scale war…. So ‘Adrien ACDC’ it is.”

“That’s too wonderful,” Luka laughed, putting a hand over his mouth to muffle the sound so as not to wake Emma. “I might need to talk to my agent about crediting me as ‘Luka ACDC’ going forward. That’s _too_ wonderful.”

“Aren’t you glad I thought of it?” Adrien preened.

Luka nodded appreciatively. “It’ll make signing autographs a lot easier.”

Just then, a trampling of feet came pounding down the stairs, long nails clicking on the wood floors.

Adrien made a mental note to schedule a grooming appointment to have those nails trimmed. The children often roughhoused with Mélodie and were liable to get scratched.

One hundred pounds of pony-sized [Anatolian Shepherd](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anatolian_Shepherd) lumbered into the front room, a sleepy-eyed Hugo loosely hanging onto her creamy tan coat.

“Papá?” Hugo yawned. “Daddy?”

“Hey, Buddy. Up again?” Luka got to his feet and scooped Hugo into his arms, bringing their four-year-old to sit on the bench with them.

“I couldn’t sleep,” Hugo explained, resting his head on Luka’s shoulder.

“Hey, Sweet Prince,” Adrien greeted, leaning in to kiss his son’s forehead and nuzzle his thick black hair.

This resulted in Adrien fumbling a few notes and Emma stirring once more with a little whimper.

“Sorry, Angel-Baby,” Adrien whispered.

“How’s Emmie?” Hugo leaned in to look down at his sister, sapphire eyes wide with worry.

“Gogo,” Emma whined, and Hugo reached out to stroke her hair.

Nooroo flew over to nestle in his favourite spot on top of Hugo’s head.

Mélodie sat at Adrien’s feet, resting her head on the piano bench and nosing Adrien’s thigh for attention.

“Hey, Baby Girl,” Adrien cooed.

Mélodie gave a tired thump of her tail. She would be ten years old in December, and she was beginning to slow down. She adored her little siblings, but Hugo and Emma wore Mélodie out.

“Emmie’s in pain,” Hugo observed, beginning to tear up himself.

“She’s going to be just fine, Young Master Hugo,” Nooroo assured, petting Hugo’s hair.

“Yeah. No need for tears, Minou.” Plagg flew up to wipe Hugo’s eyes before returning to his post cuddled up with Emma.

“We called one of your grandfather’s doctors, and he’ll be here soon to take care of her,” Luka added with a big, encouraging smile.

Hugo looked deep into Luka’s eyes and frowned. “You’re worried, Papá.”

Luka grimaced. “But that’s no reason for you to be. This is a grownup worry thing, not a Hugo worry thing. …Why don’t you play something for your sister? Emmie, would you like to hear Hugo play?”

“Mmm. Gogo,” Emma agreed.

Hugo pursed his lips, staring Luka down for a minute before relenting. He turned himself on Luka’s lap and slowly worked through Adrien’s usual set of ‘bare-minimum-warmup’ scales. He took a deep breath and carefully, slowly started to play [Mozart’s Twelve Variations on “Ah, Vous Dirai-Je, Maman”](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xyhxeo6zLAM).

“Twinkle, twinkle little bat,” Emma sang along, substituting in the lyrics from Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland that Adrien had been reading the children as their bedtime story. (It was a dramatic reading complete with singing and dancing and character voices and sound effects. Sometimes Marinette and Luka would come stand in the hall to peek in and listen without disrupting the children’s one-on-one time with Adrien.)

Hugo’s hands were sometimes too small to hit all the notes, and his motor control wasn’t good enough to always play at tempo, but he did his best, and, although his best paled in comparison to his professional and hobbyist pianist fathers, he far outshone most other four-year-olds.

“That’s really awesome, Hugo,” Luka praised as Hugo finished playing the theme section with relative control and fluidity.

Hugo smiled up toothily at his fathers. “I can do more. It’s not that good—I can’t do it like it’s supposed to be—but I can do the first six variations.” He proceeded to play the first variation slowly and imperfectly, but his performance definitely showed promise.

Luka let out a low whistle. “You’ve got all that in your head?”

Hugo nodded, moving on to the second variation.

“Where did you learn this?” Adrien wondered, awed. “We don’t have the sheet music, do we? Was it in one of your beginning piano books?”

Hugo shook his head, concentrating hard on the notes. “Grandpa plays it with me. He says the songs in my books are too simple for me, so we play Mozart when I go over.”

Luka looked at Adrien quizzically.

Adrien put his hands up in surrender. “I did not know about this.”

“And you _like_ playing Mozart with your grandfather?” Luka asked neutrally, testing the waters.

Hugo nodded, hitting the wrong key, frowning, and starting the measure over to fix the mistake. “It’s fun. We play other stuff too.” Hugo gave up on talking and playing at the same time and looked up at his fathers. “Grandpa likes Ravel like Papá, so sometimes we play Ravel. I like the [fairytale pieces](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iL2fjpoS3Kw).”

Adrien nodded knowingly, his nose scrunching up. “He used to make me play those.”

Luka frowned. “You didn’t like them?”

Adrien’s grimace turned sheepish. “I didn’t like that he _made_ me play them.”

Luka hummed in understanding.

“Is that why you didn’t love the piano until you met Papá?” Hugo inquired, big sapphire eyes boring into Adrien.

Adrien blushed, head tipping to the side. He adjusted his hold on Emma. “That’s part of it.”

Luka rested a hand on Adrien’s knee and squeezed.

Adrien placed his hand on top of Luka’s, rubbing his thumb back and forth in a quiet, unspoken declaration of love.

“Grandpa doesn’t make _me_ play piano,” Hugo remarked thoughtfully. “I have to make _him_ some days. Some days he has projects he has to work on, so I play on his tablet painting clothes until he can play piano with me.”

Luka and Adrien blinked down at their son.

“He lets you play with the tablet? He never let me play with the tablet,” Adrien pouted, giving Luka’s hand a squeeze. “Orpheus, I think my father loves my son more than me.”

Luka tried not to laugh too hard. “It’s okay, P5. Don’t get a complex. _I_ love you.”

“I love you, Daddy,” Hugo chimed in.

“Mmmm,” agreed Emma.

Nuzzles and kisses were passed all around.

Then Hugo thought of something. “I wasn’t supposed to tell you that I paint clothes. Don’t tell Grandpa I told. It’s supposed to be a surprise.”

Adrien and Luka’s brows furrowed at that.

“What kind of surprise?” Adrien pressed. “Don’t worry. I won’t tell Grandpa you told.”

Hugo bit his lip. “…When I paint clothes, Grandpa tells me which ones are really good, and we save those ones to make into clothes patterns in real life like Maman does. Grandpa trusts money for the clothes that become real, and he said that when I’m older I can trade the trust to go to university or for a boat like Nanna’s Liberty or a bicycle or a whole lot of ice cream or the newest Zelda game or whatever I want.”

Adrien got the feeling that Hugo had verified this list with Gabriel, item by item.

“That’s…really generous of him,” Luka replied, a little stunned. “Very…thoughtful.”

“But Grandpa said it should be a surprise because it was too much like working and you wouldn’t like me working.” Hugo looked back and forth between his parents. “But I like painting clothes. I don’t have to stop, do I?”

“No,” Adrien assured, reaching out to stroke his son’s face. “You can keep painting clothes as long as you want. I think I owe your grandpa a thank you, though. That really is nice of him to do that for you.”

Suddenly distracted, Hugo looked down at Emma. “Emmie’s feeling better.”

Plagg quirked an ear curiously. He hadn’t felt any change in Emma’s status, pressed up against her as he was, but he experimentally phased through Emma anyway. “She _is_ cooling down,” he confirmed. “Still a little hot, but definitely better.”

“Thank God,” Adrien breathed as Luka sighed in relief.

Hugo turned back to the piano and began to play the [Snowdin Town theme](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5gMBfKNGXww) from Undertale.

Luka snickered, leaning in to nip Adrien’s ear. “He’s your son all right.”

Adrien nipped back, getting Luka’s cheek. “He’s inherited my good taste in video games. You should be grateful. I mean, he’s _biologically_ Marinette’s son. You dodged a bullet.”

“Papá, play the bottom hand,” Hugo instructed. “My hands are too little to do the chords one-handed.”

“On it,” Luka assured as Adrien held in a laugh. He teased Luka with his eyes instead.

Luka made faces back at Adrien as Hugo played contentedly and much more consistently than with the Mozart.

“We’re doing [Scarlet Forest](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2domKTeNeVE) from Delatrune next,” Hugo announced, and Luka was happy to comply.

Emma hummed dreamily along.

When they’d finished, Hugo looked up and back and forth between his parents. “Now you two. Play [Field of Hopes and Dreams](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N3xDt4L6E6U) from Deltarune. Daddy, you be on top. Papá, you take bottom.”

Luka clapped a hand over his mouth to keep from bursting out laughing.

Adrien just grinned. “I mean…what else is new?”

Luka flicked Adrien’s cheek without malice. “You say that like we never switch.”

Adrien shrugged. “I just know your preferences.”

“Piano,” Emma whined, losing patience with her fathers.

Luka shook his head and counted them in, covering the bottom line with his left hand while Adrien took the top with his right. It was a little difficult with both children in the way, and sometimes their hands almost overlapped in the quick note turnover, but they managed and stayed more or less in sync.

As the last chord rang out and dissipated into the air, applause sounded from the entranceway.

Luka, Adrien, Hugo, and Nooroo turned as one to find Marinette watching them.

“Maman!” Hugo called out, hopping down from Luka’s lap to go to his mother.

Mélodie wisely moved her tail out of the way with a little whine of indignation.

“Mama!” Emma echoed, beginning to fidget.

“Just a sec and I’ll let you out, Love,” Adrien promised, standing and undoing the sling so that he could hand off the wiggling Emma to her mother.

Marinette tussled Hugo’s hair as he wrapped his arms around her legs. “What are you still doing up, Caterpillar?” she hummed, smiling down lovingly at her child.

“I was worried about Emmie, so I couldn’t sleep,” Hugo explained, squeezing Marinette’s knees to his chest. “Papá and Daddy and I were playing piano for her.”

“You’re such a good big brother,” Marinette chuckled before turning carefully to take Emma from Adrien. “And how’s my baby girl?” she cooed, nuzzling Emma and giving her a kiss.

“Better,” Luka supplied, coming up behind Adrien and wrapping his arms around him, pulling Adrien back against himself and giving Adrien’s neck a kiss. “She’s still feverish, but I think it’s going down. One of Gabriel’s doctors is on his way to get her checked out, though.”

“Probably for the best.” Marinette nodded, bouncing Emma gently and making soothing clicking sounds with her tongue.

“Do I get a welcome home kiss, or am I old news nowadays?” Adrien pouted, leaning back against Luka, placing his arms on top of his husband’s.

Tikki flew up and deposited a kiss on the tip of Adrien’s nose. “Welcome home, Adrien!”

Luka snickered into Adrien’s neck, the vibrations tickling.

Adrien laughed. “Thanks, Tikki. It’s good to be appreciated.”

Marinette smiled, but it was her ‘smug Ladybug’ smirk. “You’ve got one of the hottest guys in the country literally hanging off of you, and you want _my_ attention too?”

“I’m greedy.” Adrien shrugged, turning his head to lick Luka’s cheek.

“You’re _needy_,” Marinette corrected, shifting Emma onto her hip so that she could have a hand free to pet Hugo’s hair, mindful of the kwami still perched there.

“You married me, Milady,” Adrien tossed back.

Marinette shook her head. “Not legally, Chaton. Legally, you’re Luka’s problem.”

“Be nice to my husband, Chanson,” Luka chuckled. “He’s perfect.”

“Isn’t he, though?” Marinette stepped in, careful of Hugo, to press her lips to Adrien’s. She pulled back so that their noses brushed. “Welcome home, Adrien.”

“Good to be home, Princess,” Adrien purred, perfectly content to be sandwiched between the two people he loved most with the children their love had made.

“…but I think you need to take your husband back up to bed,” Adrien added gently. “He’s got a concert tomorrow night, and you’re still sick, so you could both use the sleep. Only one of us needs to stay up with Emmie to wait for the doctor.”

“I don’t want to go to sleep,” Hugo pouted, sounding like a tiny Adrien replica. “I want to make sure Emmie’s okay.”

“She’s going to be fine, Buddy,” Luka assured, reluctantly letting go of Adrien to scoop up their son. “Why don’t I go tuck you in?”

Hugo gave Luka the ‘petulant Adrien frowny face’.

“Or not,” Luka conceded defeat. He’d never been much good up against the full-sized version of the ‘petulant Adrien frowny face’, and the miniature version wasn’t any easier an opponent.

“How about we all pile onto the couch and wait together?” Marinette suggested, leading the way with Emma.

Adrien, Luka carrying Hugo, the kwamis, and Mélodie all fell into step behind her. Marinette tucked her feet under herself as she sat on the near end of the couch with Emma reclining against her. Mélodie curled up on the floor in front of Marinette, and Tikki landed on Emma’s head. Plagg snuggled up next to Tikki, and Adrien curled up with Marinette. Luka threw an arm around Adrien as he sat on the far end of the sofa, hip to hip with Adrien and with Hugo on his lap, Nooroo on Hugo’s head. All together, they made a snug bunch.

“So,” Adrien hummed once they were all situated. “…Luka tells me that you ate my tofu, Buginette? Care to explain yourself?”

“Adrien,” Luka scolded. It wasn’t very effective, as he was smiling widely at the time.

Marinette blushed and returned her husbands’ grins. “I haven’t taken a test yet, but…it’s highly possible that our family might be getting bigger in the near future.”

Adrien could barely contain his squeal of glee as he leaned in to place a sloppy kiss on the side of Marinette’s head and then turned to do the same to Luka.

Hugo looked back and forth between his parents. “Are we finally getting a hamster?”

Marinette laughed like the starlight-like notes of the upper register of the piano. “No, Sweetie. Maybe someday…but I was talking about a _baby_.”

“Baby?” Hugo scrunched up his nose.

“Mmhm. How would you like a new little brother or sister?” Marinette proposed.

Hugo’s expression turned troubled. “But I like Emmie! I don’t want a different sister. Is this because she got sick?”

Adrien clapped a hand firmly over his mouth.

Marinette grimaced. “Oh…no, Sweetie.”

Luka gave Hugo a squeeze. “Buddy, Emmie’s not going anywhere. We meant that we’re going to have a new baby _in addition_ to Emmie.”

“I get to keep Emmie?” Hugo verified, a hint of terror still in his voice.

“Yes,” Luka stressed. “And you’ll get a new little sibling too.”

Hugo pursed his lips and thought about this. “…Okay. That would be okay. …Could we get one with hair like Daddy and eyes like Auntie Juleka and skin like Uncle Nino? Can you order one like that?”

“Do we tell him about designer babies?” Adrien chuckled.

Marinette smacked his arm. “No, Sweetie. You don’t order babies. You _grow_ them. They’re like flowers.”

“So can’t we just buy seeds for a baby with yellow hair and orange eyes and tan skin?” Hugo reasoned, looking up at Luka.

Luka and Marinette grimaced in unison.

Adrien took a stab at answering the question. “Unfortunately, we only have seeds on hand for babies with blue or green eyes and black hair. Maybe brownish hair if the genes mix right. Your new little sibling is going to look a lot like you and Emmie. If not, your mother will have some explaining to do.”

Marinette pinched Adrien’s nose hard.

“Ow!” Adrien whined. “It was a joke. I was joking, Milady. Luka, save me!”

“You’re on your own, P5,” Luka snickered.

“Mama, no hurt Daddy,” Emma whimpered, reaching for Marinette’s arm.

Marinette let go of Adrien and beamed down at her daughter. “Oh, Baby, I wasn’t really hurting him.”

Adrien leaned in to nuzzle Marinette’s ear affectionately. “We were just playing. We _love_ each other, right, Princess?”

“Mmhm,” Marinette agreed, turning to catch Adrien’s lips. As they pulled away, Marinette gave Adrien another ‘smug Ladybug’ smirk. “But I like Luka better.”

Adrien stuck out his tongue. “What a crazy coincidence. I do too.” He turned to wrap his arms around Luka, tucking his head under Luka’s chin. “Mine.”

Hugo reached out, putting his hand on Adrien’s face. “You’re silly, Daddy.”

“I’m theatrical,” Adrien corrected patiently. “That’s why I’m so good at my job.”

“I’m good at playing pretend too,” Hugo boasted, grinning broadly. “…How old do you have to be before they give you money to watch you play pretend?”

“I had my first acting role when I was a couple months old,” Adrien recounted, reaching out to stroke Hugo’s hair. “My mom, your Grandma Émilie, was an actor like I am. I used to be in plays and musicals with her when I was little. There are roles for children of all ages, but…I think maybe you should wait until you’re a little older.” Adrien snuck glances at Marinette and Luka who both nodded.

“How old?” Hugo pressed.

Adrien bit his lip. “Hmmm…a few years older? The Parental Council will discuss and let you know. If you’re still interested when you’re a little older, maybe we can sign you up for a class or a summer camp or something. I don’t know. I don’t know if I want you jumping into the bigtimes right away like I did. Being famous is no good for a kid. I know you’re already kind of there just with your family, but…I don’t want that for you, Hugo. Okay?”

Hugo frowned and opened his mouth to ask a question, but he was blindsided by an enormous yawn. “Okay,” he replied sleepily, starting to rub at his eyes.

“Why don’t you sleep for a bit?” Luka suggested. “We’ll wake you up when the doctor gets here.”

Hugo blinked slowly at his father. “No, you won’t,” he moped but set his head down on Luka’s left shoulder anyway, closing his eyes. “Daddy, wake me up, please.”

“Will—” Adrien was cut off by a yawn of his own. “—Sorry. Will do.”

Marinette and Luka snickered at Adrien’s expense.

“Tired, Chaton?”

“You can close your eyes for a bit too, Angel,” Luka tempted with a smirk.

Adrien nuzzled Luka’s neck. “I’m not falling for your clever scheme. I’m staying awake with Emmie. _You_ should head up to bed.”

Luka turned his smirk on Marinette. “He’ll be asleep in less than five minutes.”

Adrien bit his husband.

Luka chuckled sibilantly. “I love you.”

“…of ya…too,” Adrien replied disjointed, his breath starting to even out. His eyelids fluttered open several times as he fought off inevitable slumber, but he eventually succumbed to sleep.

Marinette smiled at Luka. “You know, if _you_ wanted to close your eyes for a few minutes…”

Luka rolled his eyes. “Love you too, Chanson.”

“The feeling’s mutual,” she assured, reaching out past Adrien to fiddle with a strand of Luka’s hair.

He caught her hand and pressed a kiss to her wrist. “I know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So. To recap, Emma is Adrien's biological daughter, and Hugo is Luka's biological son. Louis is biologically Adrien's, in case anyone was wondering. Adrien is an actor. Marinette has her own design company. Luka is lead guitarist of a moderately successful band (nothing too big-time)...and a concert pianist...and a first violin with the Orchestre de Paris. Because Luka is a ridiculously talented musician like that. Luka and Adrien are the ones legally married. There was a lot of arguing and rationalizing and agonizing over the decision before Marinette flat-out refused to marry either one of them to keep either from feeling like an unnecessary third wheel in a traditional "normal" marriage.
> 
> Did you get all that from context? ^.^; Any questions? Thoughts? What do you think? Realistic future scenario for the ACDC family? (Because of course they hyphenated all of their names in alphabetical order.) What do you like of the kids? Their personalities? Do they feel like real children? I don’t have contact with miniature humans, so I just did a lot of research on child development and child psychology. (I borrowed a lot of my brother’s textbooks. XD) I kind of made Hugo a little mature and astute for his age. He gets it from Luka. I also think that being the first child in a family with three really loving, smart parents and Gabriel, Nathalie, Sabine, Tom, and Anarka not to mention Rose and Juleka and Félix and Brigette...Hugo got a lot of attention and stimulation and socialization from day one, so I think he would be a mature kid.
> 
> Let's see...what else? "Blague" means "joke" in French. It sounds like "Plagg", and I thought it was a funny baby mispronunciation. "Barque" means "boat". It sounds like "bark", so...kind of a cross-language joke, since they're speaking French, but it amused me, so... Also, Nooroo calls Adrien "Adrien-bocchama". "Bocchama" is an honorific in Japanese attached to the end of a young male's name to mean "Young Master". For those of you reading Daisy, when we get to the scene where Adrien gets Nooroo, Nooroo tries to call Adrien "Master", but Adrien wants him to call him by his given name. Plagg, familiar with Adrien's love of anime and manga, suggests "Adrien-bocchama". Nooroo takes to it like a duck. 
> 
> (Has anyone heard the Vocaloid song "Butterfly on Your Right Shoulder"? This is kind of just an Easter egg, but the butterfly in the song is purple too. Just an inside joke with myself. ^.^;) Also, my children are Anatolian Shepherd mixed with Basset Hound. I have a soft spot for shepherd dogs. I'm planning on Mélodie to show up in Jabberwocky at this point. She's a Christmas present from Luka. Also, it is my headcanon that Marinette plays really niche indie games, so that’s what Adrien’s comment is about.
> 
> Thanks so much for reading, guys! With this, I have surpassed 500k posted this year in this fandom. Thanks for celebrating the milestone with me! I'll see you tomorrow for Chapter Four of Jabberwocky. Take care!
> 
> References:  
Chopin Raindrop Prelude: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sh03YXzvDF4  
Chopin Spring Waltz: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a0hFZPvanMs  
I am the One (Reprise): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AZykalGde4A  
Ravel Miroirs No. 3: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5O5wMctUSAM  
Anatolian Shepherd: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anatolian_Shepherd  
Mozart Twelve Variations: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xyhxeo6zLAM  
Ravel Ma Mère l’Oye: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iL2fjpoS3Kw  
Undertale Snowdin Town: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5gMBfKNGXww  
Deltarune Scarlet Forest: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2domKTeNeVE  
Deltarune Field of Hopes and Dreams: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N3xDt4L6E6U


	11. Dies Irae, Dies Illa

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Luka has a song stuck in his head.  
Hugo likes unusual lullabies.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! Good to see you again. I'm feeling a little better this week. Whenever it gets cold, I just shut down (I have Seasonal Affective Disorder), and it got cold really quickly this month. Seriously. It was about ninety/thirty-two degrees three weeks ago, and now it's forty/five. :/ I can't even.
> 
> Anyway! Thanks for your comments and bookmarks and kudos. I'm so glad that so many of you are enjoying these snippets. We've got another domestic/happy one today. I hope you enjoy it!
> 
> This takes place in the future when Adrien and Marinette are twenty-four/five and Luka is twenty-six/seven. Hugo is four months to sixteen months. Emma will be born about nine months after the end of the chapter.

“What were you humming just now?” Marinette inquired through a yawn as she took Hugo from Luka, careful to support the baby’s head. “It seemed to calm him down.”

Luka froze. “…Uh…”

He’d been absentmindedly humming a [Gregorian chant](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tDJTN8L1JT0), the [Dies Irae](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dies_irae) from the requiem mass. Literally, the title meant “day of wrath”, and the lyrics in Latin described the Day of Judgment: ashes and fire and punishment and despair. Not exactly the most age-appropriate lullaby for their four-month-old.

It was quoted in a _lot_ of classical pieces, though, and, thus, currently stuck in Luka’s head.

Not that he wanted to try to explain any of that to his wife at three in the morning.

“Nothing,” he lied but then immediately repented. “It’s just a little snatch of something the Orchestre is playing at an upcoming concert.”

“Teach it to me?” Marinette requested as she got situated in the rocking chair and held Hugo up to her breast to feed him.

“How about we do [Bach’s Little Fugue in G Minor](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pVadl4ocX0M) instead?” Luka suggested, coming over to give the side of Marinette’s head a kiss. “He likes that one too. That’s the one Adrien always sings to him…when he’s not singing something from a musical or a video game.”

Luka hummed softly as he gently bounced Hugo, walking him round and round the island in the middle of the kitchen.

“Why are you humming the Dies Irae?” Adrien finally inquired from where he leaned in the doorway watching.

Luka jumped.

Adrien sprang forward to steady his husband and make sure their eight-month-old son was secure in his sling. “Sorry. Sorry. I am _so_ sorry. I thought you knew I was there. I’m so sorry, Luka.”

“It’s…okay,” Luka struggled to get out, breathing ragged.

“You okay, Sweet Prince?” Adrien peeked down at Hugo to find the baby laughing happily.

“Looks like someone enjoys jump scares,” Luka snorted in amusement, leaning in to rest his forehead against Adrien’s.

“Sorry, Orpheus,” Adrien whispered, hands going up to Luka’s cheeks to gently pull him in for a kiss.

Luka hummed contentedly into Adrien’s lips as they waltzed with his own.

“So why the Dies Irae?” Adrien mumbled, back on task the instant they pulled away.

Luka groaned, bouncing Hugo once more. “Not only is the Orchestre doing [Berlioz’s Symphonie Fantastique](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tQWhP3Zzip8), but I’m also soloist for [Liszt’s Totentanz](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7nVmFlSV1ok), so that melody is doubly stuck in my head.”

“My poor baby,” Adrien teased.

Luka rolled his eyes.

“I loooove Totentanz,” Adrien chuckled, catching one of Luka’s hands in his own. “Play it for me?”

“Now?” Luka laughed incredulously, shaking his head at his husband’s capriciousness.

“I mean…we’re up anyway, and Hugo seems to enjoy the Dies Irae, so…why not?” Adrien reasoned. “Besides, why did I go to the trouble of marrying a sexy piano virtuoso if I can’t have songs played live on demand at any hour of the night I want them?”

Luka tried not to grin as he tugged Adrien into the front room where they kept Adrien’s old baby grand piano. “You certainly didn’t marry me for my money or my body. I honestly don’t know what you were thinking.”

“I _wasn’t_ thinking.” Adrien shrugged. “I’m so in love with you, I’m not capable of rational thought.”

Luka snickered. “You weren’t capable of rational thought _before_ you fell in love with me.”

“Rude. See if I make babies with you anymore.” Adrien flicked his husband on the cheek before carefully taking Hugo in his sling from Luka.

“Angel,” Luka cajoled, lifting the lid on the piano keys.

Adrien shook his head as he sat on the piano bench. “Nope. Don’t you ‘Angel’ me. I will not be seduced.”

With a shrug of defeat, Luka sat beside Adrien and began a quick warmup.

“You’re not even _trying _to seduce me,” Adrien pouted. “What’s the big idea here?”

“I thought you wanted me to serenade you with macabre dance of death music about the black plague,” Luka replied with a smirk.

Adrien’s lower lip jutted forward. “Well, yes…but you could at least kiss me first.”

Luka gladly obliged, and when he pulled back, Adrien looked deliriously happy.

Luka grinned, chuckling at Adrien’s expression.

“What?” Adrien pouted, rocking Hugo from side to side.

“I love your smile.”

Luka could _just_ make out a pastel pink blush on Adrien’s cheeks in the dim lighting.

“I love _you_,” he added.

“I love you too,” Adrien whispered back, scooting closer on the bench to rest his head on Luka’s shoulder. “It’s good to finally just be together and happy, isn’t it?”

“Mm,” Luka agreed, content to sit there with the man he loved and their child for as long as the moment lasted.

That turned out to be about thirty seconds.

After that, Adrien decided that they’d cuddled enough and that it was time for Luka to play piano. “I’ll go ahead and sing the orchestra parts. You play the piano solo.”

“My baby!” Adrien cooed, eliciting a happy shriek of laughter and an answering, “Daddy!” from sixteen-month-old Hugo.

Hugo reached out his arms, and it was all Gabriel could do to keep a hold on the squirming toddler.

Adrien took his son, covering him with kisses and nuzzles.

Gabriel grinned, putting a polite hand over his mouth as he chuckled.

Plagg and Nooroo shared an amused look before returning to their posts in Adrien’s left and right shoulders respectively.

“How was he? Did he wake you guys a lot?” Adrien smiled up sheepishly at his father.

“Not too bad,” Gabriel replied judiciously. “A little fussy, and he wanted you three, but Nooroo and Plagg helped a lot as far as his homesickness went. Hugo ate just fine and eventually went to sleep after we laid him down last night. He didn’t disturb us too much. Not unreasonably so for sleeping away from home, anyway. _You_ were much, much worse at his age.”

“Good to know,” Adrien snorted, a bright smile breaking out on his lips as he hugged his child to him, bouncing Hugo slightly. “Thank you so much for doing this. Luka and Marinette are super grateful too.”

Gabriel waved the thanks away. “It was no trouble at all. You know how much we enjoy babysitting. Hugo is a joy to spend time with.”

Adrien’s grin widened. “I’m really, really happy to hear you say so.”

Gabriel shrugged. “Nathalie and I would be glad to watch him whenever you need. Tom and Sabine hog him too much, and I’m uncomfortable with you leaving him alone with Anarka.”

Adrien grimaced. “She’s his grandma too, Dad. Play nice.”

Gabriel gave a petulant scoff. “It’s a wonder that Luka managed to raise himself so well with a mother like that Gaelic witch. _She_ thinks she has more right to Hugo than I do.”

Adrien refrained from commenting that _Gabriel himself _had been a little slow to embrace Hugo as his grandson in the absence of a genetic link. “Well, she’s wrong. Try to be the bigger person when we have a green-eyed baby, okay? Regardless of biological paternity, all kids of this union belong to all three of us equally, so make sure you treat them all the same. Hugo adores you, and I’m sure it would really hurt if you started giving a hypothetical green-eyed sibling preferential treatment.”

“I would never,” Gabriel snorted in disgust, reaching out to stroke Hugo’s thick, dark hair. “He may not be biologically yours, but he’s one hundred percent your son, Adrien.”

Adrien blinked, taken aback by the certainty in his father’s voice. “Really? What makes you say that?”

Gabriel chuckled. “He has your mannerisms. Sometimes he’ll do something that’s obviously Marinette or patently Luka, but, a lot of times, he’ll make a face, and I can tell he got it from watching and mimicking you.”

“Yeah? Like what?” Adrien pressed, excited by this revelation. He had never really thought that Hugo resembled him even though both Marinette and Luka had commented upon it separately before. Perhaps it was because Adrien couldn’t see himself to have a mental picture to compare his son with, but…

“His pout is a carbon copy of yours,” Gabriel sighed. “He’s got your puppy dog eyes too.”

Adrien’s smile turned pained. “Ah. I see. So all the manipulative ploys, huh?”

Gabriel rolled his eyes. “He has your smile too…and your sweetness with none of your mischief. He’s inherited a lot from you despite the lack of shared genes. Don’t pout so, Adrien.”

“I’m not pouting,” Adrien pouted.

Gabriel gave Adrien an eyeroll encore. “How was your date last night? I trust you three had a nice dinner out?”

Adrien immediately perked up. “It was wonderful. Thank you. It was also nice to be able to get a solid eight hours of sleep without having to get up with Hugo.”

Gabriel assumed an air of nonchalance as he inquired, “Just out of curiosity and not to sound like I’m competing with Anarka, when are you three planning on having a green-eyed child?”

Adrien’s brow scrunched up like gathered fabric folds. “Seriously?”

Gabriel shrugged primly.

“We’re not actively trying, but we stopped actively not trying two or three months ago, so…but it’s not like we’re being intentional about who the biological father is. You and Anarka really need to cut it out.” Adrien shifted Hugo onto his hip with a sigh. “Should I have Luka talk to her?”

“That won’t be necessary,” Gabriel assured sullenly and then abruptly switched topics so as to put an end to the discussion. “By the way, I’ve wondered this for a while, but…why does Hugo hum the Dies Irae? He wanted it as a lullaby last night. It was rather…odd. Not that I’m one to comment on your parenting choices, I suppose.”

Adrien gave a snort as he struggled to stifle a bout of laughter. “That’s Luka’s fault. It’s one of the most quoted musical passages in the repertoire, so it gets stuck in his head a lot, and when he’s tired and up in the middle of the night with Hugo… I think it’s because he didn’t get a lot of traditional lullabies when he was little. Anarka sang him rock and roll, so he doesn’t have the standard classics to fall back on, and he fills in the gap with music he does know.”

Adrien bit his lip. “…Kind of like how you and Maman had crappy parents who didn’t sing standard lullabies to you two, so you didn’t know them to sing them to me, so now I sing musical numbers like [All I Ask of You](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dML7t149ATE) from Phantom of the Opera or video game music like [Zelda’s Lullaby](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EKLAUNc58iA) from The Legend of Zelda to my own child. I think Marinette’s the only one who really knows traditional lullabies, and half of hers are in Chinese…which she doesn’t speak, so she’s not even sure she’s getting the words right.”

Gabriel frowned. “Can’t _you_ tell?”

Adrien shook his head, bouncing Hugo gently. “They’re not in Mandarin. Sabine’s parents both spoke Mandarin, so that’s what they spoke in the house growing up, but her mother was originally from a different region in China before they moved to France, so the lullabies she sang to Sabine were in a different dialect which I do not speak.”

Gabriel pursed his lips, tempted to ask whether the dialects were similar enough that Adrien could make any of it out, but he remembered Adrien once telling him that most Chinese dialects sounded like completely different languages to him.

“What dialect do Bridgette and Félix speak?” he inquired instead.

Adrien shrugged. “Mandarin. I’d have to ask Sabine about the lyrics…. Well, I should probably get going. The first thing Luka asked me this morning was when I was going to pick up Hugo. I think he’s going through withdrawal,” Adrien chuckled, giving Hugo a nuzzle. “Your Papá misses you.”

“Papá!” Hugo trilled happily.

Adrien turned back to Gabriel. “Thanks again, Dad.”

“Bring him back any time,” Gabriel stressed. “Make sure you ask us before Anarka.”

Adrien shook his head, making a mental note to have Luka talk to the Capitaine about this grandparent rivalry she and Gabriel had going on. “Will do. Thanks, Dad.”

Adrien turned to go, and Gabriel hesitated a beat before calling out, “Adrien?”

“Hm?” Adrien looked back, tipping his head.

“Do you…” Gabriel worried at his bottom lip. “Does it bother you that you’re not familiar with the traditional lullabies?”

Adrien shrugged unconcernedly. “Not really. In a way, it’s more fun to sing anime theme songs and Bach and the Dies Irae. I think it makes Hugo more cultured too, so it’s not a bad thing.”

Gabriel nodded, relieved. “Good. That’s good. Take care, Son.”

Gabriel later stopped to think that his grandson was going to be a very eclectic child with so many varied influences. He wondered if the other children at school would appreciate Hugo’s uniqueness.

Gabriel winced and wondered whether Marinette, Luka, and Adrien would allow Hugo to be homeschooled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> True story: I get the Dies Irae stuck in my head a lot because it's in everything. (And I like it. XD) Just this month I've gone to hear Mahler's Resurrection as well as Rachmaninoff's Symphonic Dances, and the Dies Irae is quoted in both. So I'll be humming it and someone will ask me what I'm humming and I'll freeze. Usually I tell them it's Liszt or Berlioz and they smile and nod and think I'm cultured instead of weird and macabre. ^.~ ...But now you know my secret. ^.^; Oh, well. We're friends, right?
> 
> I'm a dog mom to twins, and my son has panic attacks when there are storms. Singing to him calms him down a bit. Mostly I sing Zelda songs like Lon Lon Ranch and Song of Storms. Anime theme songs and classical music like Bach's Little Fugue are also old standbys.
> 
> In other news, I think I've decided that today (10/22) is Luka's birthday in my stories. Happy Birthday, Luc! Sorry I torture you all the time.
> 
> Thank you for reading, guys! I hope you enjoyed today's installment. I'll see you again soon!
> 
> References:  
Dies Irae Chant: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tDJTN8L1JT0  
Dies Irae: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dies_irae  
Bach’s Little Fugue: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pVadl4ocX0M   
Berlioz Movement Five Dies Irae Excerpt: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tQWhP3Zzip8   
Liszt Totentanz: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7nVmFlSV1ok   
POTO All I Ask of You: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dML7t149ATE  
LOZ Zelda’s Lullaby: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EKLAUNc58iA


	12. Lost Woods

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just another day of late night phone conversations, denial, sexual tension, painful honesty, and fluff.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! I'm so excited to have you back for more fluff and angst. Are you excited for more fluff and angst?! ^o^ (Really, no one is okay this chapter.) Thanks for coming back week after week. I appreciate you guys, and I'm excited to share this chapter with you...even though it went a LOT of really weird directions. I hope you enjoy it. ^.^;
> 
> Chapter title song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5niOf54X_iM
> 
> This takes place during Jabberwocky in late October, early November. Adrien is eighteen and a half, and Luka just turned twenty-one. I hadn't originally intended this or the next chapter to be canonical to the Jabberwocky universe, so I came at this with a mindset of, "I can do whatever I want!"...but...then some important stuff happened that made me think, "Yeah...parts of this should definitely be canon. Other parts... Whoops". So take it with a grain of salt. ^.^;

“What?!?!?!” Adrien typed furiously, rolling over onto his stomach to stare incredulously down at his phone.

“sorry to wreck your image of me ariel”

“i dont play video games” Luka typed again.

“At ALL?!” Adrien keened via text.

“nope”

“EVER?!”

“never”

“How are you dating Marinette?” Adrien blew out a long sigh as he frowned at his screen.

Luka raised an eyebrow, trying to determine whether he should be offended. He decided not to waste the energy since it was Adrien asking. “excuse you?”

“Marinette is the queen of obscure, niche video games,” Adrien replied. “It’s fashion, Jagged Stone, and video games with her. How can you be dating her and not play video games?”

Adrien bit his lip and decided to push his luck, adding, “And, for that matter, how in the world did WE date for five months without me realizing that you don’t play video games? I was super into Undertale that summer, wasn’t I? We TALKED about Undertale, didn’t we?”

Luka smiled fondly, shoulders shaking with a little chuckle. “ah u see its because im a good boyfriend”

“i let u and her talk”

“i listen”

“i ask questions when i dont understand”

“i ask questions to keep u talking and get u to go in greater depth”

“u get to say everything u want and feel like your thoughts and ideas are being heard”

“i let u carry the conversation and youre so excited u dont notice that im not adding much”

Adrien pursed his lips, not sure how to feel about this revelation. On the one hand, it was sort of like he’d been deceived. On the other hand, he was kind of impressed, and he knew Luka hadn’t had any malicious intent. It made Adrien and Marinette happy to talk about video games, so Luka had let them talk about video games.

“Well played, Sir.” Adrien finally responded. “You really are a good boyfriend if you’ll sit and listen to super nerds like us yammer on about things you don’t really care about.”

“i care”

“i care because its something that u care about even if im not personally interested”

“its interesting listening to u two talk about the things youre passionate about”

Adrien rolled over onto his back and grabbed a pillow to scream into. Once finished, he threw the pillow at the headboard and groaned aloud, “Why are you not single?!”

Plagg and Nooroo, busy catching up on all the great movies Nooroo had missed while being lost and then kept prisoner, glanced up from the tablet Gabriel had bought them and shared a look.

“You’re an amazing boyfriend.” Adrien typed back, not letting his frustrations seep into the conversation.

Out loud, Luka sighed. He wondered if Marinette would agree with Adrien’s assessment. Somehow, Luka doubted it, seeing as Luka lacked the one thing that Marinette really cared about: being Adrien.

“thank u i try” Luka replied succinctly.

“You’re the best boyfriend I’VE ever had.” Adrien added.

Luka had to laugh at that. “im the ONLY boyfriend youve ever had ariel”

“With a boyfriend like you, one is all I’ll ever need.” Adrien chuckled, letting himself flirt. Typically, Luka would flirt back, and that always made Adrien feel better. He could really use a mood lift at that moment.

Luka sucked in a sharp breath as he read (he thought) too much into Adrien’s words…until Adrien sent a follow-up text:

“I’m single, by the way, if you’re interested. We should get back together.”

Luka winced even as his heart leapt in his chest at the prospect.

But Luka was dating Marinette (however rocky things were between them at times), and Adrien…sometimes Luka thought that Adrien just wanted attention.

“RED” Luka typed, serving a cease and desist letter on that line of conversation.

“Sorry!” Adrien shot back instantly, sitting up on his bed and drawing his knees into his chest. “…Would it make it better or worse if I said I was kidding?”

“Worse,” Luka whispered, shaking his head as he typed, “RED ARIEL”, hoping Adrien would get the point and drop it.

“Okay. Sorry.” Adrien answered, letting the topic go. “So, WHY don’t you play video games?”

Luka stared hard at his phone for nearly a full minute before he deemed himself okay to continue the conversation. “there are other things id rather be doing with my hands”.

“Am I on that list?” Adrien pressed send before his mind could suitably catch up. He slapped himself in the forehead. “Sorry. Please ignore that.”

Luka frowned, beginning to sense that something wasn’t quite right with Adrien. First of all, Adrien had sent him an “are you awake?” text around one in the morning. Secondly, Adrien was deliberately pushing Luka’s buttons, trying to get a reaction, attention. Something was clearly bothering Adrien.

“r u ok” Luka typed, fully expecting the lie that followed.

“Yeah. Totally fine. Why?” Adrien replied too quickly.

Luka pressed his lips together, considering. It was so hard to tell if he should push without hearing Adrien’s voice and seeing his face. “youre doing the text equivalent of trying to get me to hug u”

“whats up angel”

Adrien squirmed as Luka brought out the big guns. The “Angel” nickname wasn’t nearly as affective without Luka’s cajoling tone to go with it, though.

“Nothing.” Adrien lied. “Sorry about the aggressive flirting. I’m just in a mood.”

Luka pressed the call button.

Adrien groaned, flopping over once more as he answered. “Hey, Orpheus,” he purred, putting on the best show of being fine that he could manage. “You didn’t have to call me.”

“I wanted to hear the sound of your voice,” Luka chuckled, his own deep and warm, making Adrien want to curl up in it and let it wrap around him like a blanket.

“Well. Here it is,” Adrien hummed, grabbing the pillow he had thrown and hugging it to his chest. “What do you want me to say? Test. Test. One, two, three?”

Luka rolled his eyes. “Tell me about this mood you’re in.”

“I’m not an expert on phone sex, but aren’t you supposed to ask me what I’m wearing?” Adrien baited.

Luka pulled the phone away from his ear and glared at it. Dealing with Adrien at one in the morning when they were both tired and lacking mental filters was dangerous.

“What are you wearing?” Luka played along.

“Socks,” Adrien giggled.

Luka cocked an eyebrow. “…And?”

“Oh, that’s it,” Adrien snickered. “Want me to send you a picture?”

“You’re trying to distract me from talking about what’s upsetting you,” Luka remarked.

Adrien ignored him, announcing, “I’m sending you a picture.”

A quarter of a minute later, Luka’s phone dinged with a text, and Luka was half afraid to look lest ogling the picture constitute cheating on his girlfriend.

Who was he kidding? They were already there.

Adrien was stretched out on his bed, smiling up at the camera, eyes smoldering with something a little more authentic than the seductive gaze he had curated for photoshoots. He was wearing a wide-necked, fuzzy white sweater with a cat wearing a daisy crown on the front. It was the angle that really did Luka in. It was as if Luka was poised above Adrien on the bed, looking down with the boy he loved under him.

Adrien chuckled in triumphant as he heard Luka’s breath hitch. “Like my sweater?”

“It’s…a nice sweater,” Luka managed, shifting uncomfortably on his bed, very, very tempted.

“I’m thinking about taking it off,” Adrien added thoughtfully with a nonchalance that made Luka want to scream.

He hated when Adrien played with him. True, Adrien got the attention he craved, and it was good that Luka could help Adrien feel better, but Luka was always left feeling so empty and used in the end.

It was the same with Marinette. 

Luka gave. Adrien and Marinette took and took. What Luka wanted didn’t matter. They didn’t stop to think about what _he_ needed. They assumed he was fine, that he would just smile and meditate and play music and forgive and indulge them and be everything to everyone night and day because he was perfect and unshakable and not as screwed up as they were.

He was being unfair, he realized. How were they supposed to know if he never said anything? He’d never said anything. He’d just taken it all without complaint.

He was afraid to say something and topple the precarious balance of their Jenga tower.

He was fine.

He would be fine.

Until the day that he wasn’t.

Luka sighed softly, putting the phone back to his ear. “I wouldn’t want you to be cold, Ariel. Keep your clothes on.”

Adrien’s brow furrowed slightly as he caught a hint of something off in Luka’s voice. “…Are you okay? I’m not upsetting you, am I? I’m sorry. I just… When I’m feeling crappy, it feels good to press other people’s buttons. I…can’t really explain it. I…” He bit his lip, trying to string together the right words.

“You don’t have to explain,” Luka assured, moving his guitar out of the way and lying down on his back. “You like being able to control people because, in your everyday life, you’re always the one being controlled. You’re hardly the first repressed Dom I’ve come across, Adrien.”

“Oh,” Adrien replied softly, taken aback. “So…this is like…an actual thing?”

“Mmhm.”

“I just thought I was weird and manipulative,” Adrien muttered pensively, curling and uncurling his toes.

“That’s your father’s voice in your head telling you ugly lies about yourself,” Luka informed as gently as possible.

“Oh,” Adrien whispered.

“You know…” Luka couldn’t believe he was about to do this. “If this is something you’d be interested in exploring further in a safe setting…”

Adrien’s ears perked up, and his heart rate doubled.

“…I know two or three Subs I’d trust with you. I could introduce you.”

The bottom dropped out of Adrien’s stomach at the thought that Luka would willingly give him to someone else. He knew Luka wasn’t a jealous person, but…

“…No,” Adrien replied softly. “Thanks, but I don’t think I… I’m good for now.”

“Okay. Just let me know if you change your mind,” Luka assured, wanting Adrien to know that he was allowed to change his mind.

Adrien chewed on the inside of his cheek, considering before tentatively inquiring, “So…are you a… Am I allowed to ask? Are you a Dom or a Sub? Or is there something else? I never actually got ‘the talk’, so I’m sort of an autodidact when it comes to sex, and I have a feeling I missed a lot. Does everybody fall into a category like that, or…?”

Luka bit his tongue on the subject of Gabriel and Émilie Agreste’s bad parenting and focused instead on answering Adrien’s questions to the best of his abilities. “As far as whether or not everyone falls into a particular category, the answer is probably not. I can’t speak for the entire human population, but this isn’t really something I’m into personally…. Honoré was, though,” Luka added as almost an afterthought.

Adrien squirmed at the name of the first guy, the first person period, Luka had slept with when he was sixteen.

“If it’s something my partner wants, I don’t have a problem with it,” Luka continued diplomatically. “I can go both ways depending on my mood and whom I’m with…. It’s not purely a sex thing, you know. I’ve had those kind of dynamics with boyfriends and girlfriends I’ve never slept with…. Like with you,” Luka remarked cautiously, treading carefully. 

“Me?” Adrien echoed softly, suddenly nervous.

“Mmhm. With you, you don’t want sex. You tease me and make all kinds of innuendos, but your end goal isn’t sex,” Luka explained. “You do and say outrageous things to get me worked up. You exert control over my level of arousal because it makes you feel better about yourself that you can make someone want you. It’s tied up with sex, but it has nothing to do with sex for you.”

“I didn’t expect to be psychoanalyzed this evening,” Adrien hummed grumpily. “I think you’re off the mark, though. I mess with you because I’m a bad, home-wrecking friend. There are plenty of other people out there I could make want me. It’s not hard. I mean, you’ve seen me. All I have to do is smile, and I have people wanting to take my clothes off. You’re reading too much into this.”

“Those other people don’t count,” Luka chuckled. “How they feel about you doesn’t matter. They can’t make you feel the way you want to feel.”

“Are you saying only you can?” Adrien snorted. “Now who’s seducing whom?”

“I’m not the only one who can,” Luka admitted. “But the reason I matter is because I’ve seen you without your Adrien freaking Agreste, supermodel (registered trademark) mask on. I’ve seen the quote, unquote ‘ugly’ side of you, so if you can still make me want you after that…you can feel like that’s a real victory.”

Adrien hummed, disconcerted. “I don’t like this conversation. I don’t like thinking about why I do things. It’s so much simpler to just do things and either feel good or bad about it. Can we go back to flirting?”

“I have a girlfriend, Ariel,” Luka sighed. “I’m trying really hard to be good.”

“…You’re in a bad mood,” Adrien observed, feeling the sharp pang of guilt between his ribs. “I’m sorry. Is it my fault?”

“I’m fine, Adrien. Don’t worry about it,” Luka mumbled, closing his eyes and running a hand through his hair.

“You sound tired,” Adrien whispered.

“I _am_ tired. It’s almost two in the morning.” Luka did not want to get into this.

“I’m sorry,” Adrien repeated, beginning to panic. “I didn’t mean to—okay. No. That’s a lie. I totally did push your buttons on purpose. What I _didn’t_ mean to do was upset you.”

“Adrien, it’s fine. I’m not upset with you,” Luka promised, hoping Adrien wouldn’t push.

Adrien bit his lip. “Earlier…you asked what was wrong. I’m in a mood because today in our Business class as we were packing up, Marinette was humming that song you wrote the other day when we were snuggling on the couch, and I just…”

Adrien squirmed, reliving the ugly, uncomfortable feeling writhing in his stomach. “…Hearing her humming the siren leitmotif just made me…feel stuff. It’s like…I itch all over. It makes no sense because I’m jealous in two different directions. I’m jealous because you played something that was yours and mine for her. It’s like…you gave her something that was mine,” he pouted.

Luka’s heart took a split second to process the fact that Adrien Agreste was getting jealous over _him_.

“And then,” Adrien continued, “at the same time, _she_ is humming this song and thinking about _you_, not even hearing _me_ in the notes. So I’m jealous of her and I’m jealous of you, and I’m a horrible person because I flirt with your girlfriend. Like, all the time,” Adrien stressed, starting to sound a touch hysteric. “And then I turn around and throw myself at _you_. I’m a disaster and a miserable excuse for a human being. That’s why I’m upset. That’s why I started texting you after midnight. So be mad at me or something. I don’t know. Yell at me.”

Luka was silent for a long moment. Then, he blew out a slow sigh and asked, “Why are you always trying to get me to hurt and reject you, Adrien? Don’t you ever get tired of the drama, or do you just not know how to have a functional relationship? I’m not being sarcastic. I’m seriously asking.”

“I don’t…know,” Adrien answered in a small voice. “I feel like…you shouldn’t care about me. I’m bad, so…you shouldn’t be nice to me. Sort of. If that makes sense.”

Luka took a minute to really hear Adrien’s words and then replied, “…You should stop trying to sabotage yourself, Adrien. You’re not a _bad_ human being. You’re just _a_ human being. There are worse out there who still deserve to be loved, so try to remember that you deserve to be loved too,” Luka responded wearily. “…I already knew you and Marinette flirted. You do it right in front of my face sometimes. It’s just like how you and I flirt in front of Marinette…and behind her back.”

There was a heavy silence.

“Do you guys make out?” Luka couldn’t help but wonder.

“What?! No! Of course not, Luka,” Adrien insisted, sitting up in bed once more. “I wouldn’t do that to you.”

“You try to get _me_ to kiss you,” Luka argued half-heartedly.

“There are different rules,” Adrien muttered. “You’ve never ripped my heart out before. She has, so…it’s okay to hurt her a little.”

“Is that why you want me to hurt you? Because you hurt me two years ago?” Luka wondered.

“Maybe?” Adrien shrugged. “I don’t really sit and think this out. It’s just kind of…what I feel, I guess.”

“This is too complicated,” Luka groaned.

“…You two could have a ménage à trois with me,” Adrien suggested, wondering how that even worked.

Luka winced. “First off, Marinette isn’t that into me. I think she’d rather just be with you, if we’re entertaining ideas of taking our clothes off. Secondly, there’s a _reason_ why you and Marinette aren’t off living happily ever after right now, Adrien.”

“We’re toxic waste together romantically and only just starting to rebuild our friendship and trust in one another,” Adrien recited tiredly.

“Precisely. Do you really think introducing sex into this equation is what you need to be doing?” Luka posed the question.

If he were being truthful, Adrien would have to say no.

“…Is she still not being physically affectionate with you?” Adrien hummed unhappily.

Luka shrugged. “It’s…getting better…a little.”

She was kissing him now occasionally. After that first kiss at the Agrestes’ wedding where she had only kissed him because she thought it was something that she _should_ do…because she was upset about things with Adrien…Marinette had been kissing him occasionally. It was never for the reasons Luka wanted to be kissed. It was never about him. He was just…there. Like a prop. She still shied away most of the time when he wanted to kiss her, and when she didn’t, it was awkward. She let him kiss her. She responded, but her heart wasn’t in it.

He’d never felt so drained and demoralized after kissing before.

“Oh, Luc,” Adrien crooned, heart truly going out to Luka. “I’m so sorry. Pretty Boy, you deserve all the kisses and snuggles in the world. What the hell is she thinking stringing you along like this? You two have been dating for, like, four months, right?”

Luka hummed noncommittally, scrubbing a hand down his face.

“…Is that why you’re in a bad mood today?” Adrien wondered. “Even before I started bullying you because of my crap?”

“I’m fine, Adrien,” Luka muttered, hoping that if he repeated it enough times it would become true.

“Luka, you were already awake when I started texting you. I know you stay up late sometimes, but…not usually on Thursday nights. What’s wrong?” Adrien entreated, voice sweet and inviting.

Luka grunted. “I’m fine.”

“You know, setting aside the ridiculous sexual tension between us for a second, I _am_ actually your friend, you know. You can talk to me about stuff…I mean, if you want to, I guess.” Adrien began to flounder. “I guess you don’t _have_ to if you don’t want to. Sorry. Am I being pushy? I’m not as good at this as you.”

Luka had to smile at that. “Thanks, but I don’t think you really want to hear about the plane crash that is my love life.”

“I’ll listen if you need someone to listen,” Adrien offered gently. “Seriously, Orpheus. I’m worried about you.”

Luka stared at the ceiling for a full fifteen seconds before giving up with an enormous sigh. “So there’s this girl I’ve been in love with for years now. I can’t get her out of my head. Like, I’ve tried. I’ve fallen in love with other people, and that works for a while, but she’s always there in the back of my mind, and as soon as the relationship ends, she’s back front and center. Now, I’m finally dating this girl, and she cares about me, and she likes me, and I get the feeling that a part of her really does want to be in this relationship, but she’s got other stuff going on in her life that she’s trying to figure out. It’s not the right time. I’m not a priority for her, and I thought that I was okay with that. I thought, ‘Well, I’ll just wait and keep being patient because, I mean, this is what I’ve _wanted_ for so long. I’ll just take whatever she can give me right now and wait until it inevitably gets better’…. It’s just taking so long,” Luka whispered into the receiver, tears of frustration and hurt building at the corners of his eyes.

“I didn’t know it would hurt so much,” he confessed, ceasing to care if Adrien knew that he was falling apart. “I didn’t know it would be so…awful. I didn’t know it would feel so bad to be…used. I signed up for this. I told her at the very beginning that it was fine that she couldn’t love me yet. I tell her all the time when she starts feeling guilty about not being able to return my feelings at the same level that she’s okay. It’s okay. _I’m_ okay.”

Luka took a shuddering breath. “I am _not_ okay. I’m not okay, but, you know, what else am I supposed to do? I love her. She is _the_ one. I have dated a lot of women, and I have never felt anything close to what I feel for her. She’s the right song, the right melody; I’m just the wrong notes right now. We’re not harmonizing like we should. I know when we finally sync up everything will be perfect, but right now? It’s like two marching bands going past one another. It’s cacophony. It’s painful.”

There was a long silence.

Adrien felt like he should say something, but he was coming up blank. “Oh, Orpheus,” he whispered. “My poor, sweet Orpheus…”

Luka chuckled darkly. “You haven’t even heard about the boy I’m in love with yet.”

Adrien winced. “Is he any better than the girl you’re in love with?”

“No.”

Silence fell once more.

“Are you going to tell me?” Adrien pressed. “If this guy is hurting you…as your friend, I think I should know. I can go beat him up for you or talk some sense into him or something.”

“He’s fine,” Luka mumbled protectively. “Leave him alone. He has his own problems he’s trying to deal with, and he doesn’t mean to hurt me.”

“The girl you love doesn’t mean to hurt you either, but she still hurts you,” Adrien argued. “Why do you give either of them a free pass?”

Luka shrugged. “I love them. I’ve never told them that they hurt me. They probably think I’m fine for the most part. They think I can take it.”

Adrien gulped, feeling cold and clammy all of the sudden. “I think you should probably tell me about this guy you’re in love with.”

“He’s having a hard time with his own life this year,” Luka hummed softly. “He leans on me a lot, and that’s fine. I’m happy to be there for him. I’m happy he trusts me and comes to me. That’s not a problem. _I’m_ the problem, honestly. I let him get under my skin. He told me up front when we reconnected earlier this year that he wasn’t looking for a relationship. He told me he just wanted to flirt because it made him feel better. I told him that was all I could offer too because I had a girlfriend. So we flirted…and I fell in love with him again.”

Adrien’s heart fluttered. He drew in a sharp breath.

“So now here I am with this guy who thinks this flirtation we have going on is all in good fun, but I’m drowning in it. He’s messing around with me because, again, this is what I sighed up for…and sometimes, for me, I’m just messing around too, but…other times…a lot of times…I want it to be real…because I’m not getting the kind of affection I want from my girlfriend, so I let myself get sucked into this…whatever you and I are doing, Adrien. I don’t know what this is anymore. The lines are so blurred, and…I don’t know,” Luka replied honestly with a slow shake of his head.

“Do you want it to be real?” Adrien whispered, holding his breath. “Go out with me.”

Plagg and Nooroo looked up from their tablet with expressions of wide-eyed shock.

Luka was too numb to get excited about the proposal. He knew it wouldn’t work. He’d already fantasied about dating Adrien hundreds of times, and he knew it wouldn’t be what he wanted it to be.

“Only if you marry me,” Luka countered.

Adrien blinked. “W-What?”

“I don’t want to date you, Adrien. I don’t want what we already have only with making out. I’m in this for the long haul. I’m looking for a different level of commitment than you’re thinking. If the idea of marrying me is impossible for you, then dating you will only be leading me on and toying with my heart in new and different ways. Think about it. If you can picture a long-term future between us, ask me out again. If not, I think I need to stay with Marinette and try to work things out. I appreciate you trying to make things right between us, but what I don’t need is to go out with you and then end up brokenhearted and alone again in a couple years. Sorry. That’s kind of where I am right now.”

Adrien worried at his bottom lip, staring down at the bedsheets and trying to piece together a response.

“So, are you regretting offering to listen to me whine about my love life yet?” Luka chuckled ironically.

“No,” Adrien whispered. He was so lost about so many things, but of _that_ he was certain. “That was definitely something that I needed to know. Luka, why have you never said anything? Why didn’t you tell me I was hurting you so badly? Why haven’t you talked to Marinette about this? Why do you keep telling everyone you’re fine when you’re not?”

Luka rolled over onto his side, letting the phone balance on the side of his face. He grunted half-heartedly. “I don’t want to tip the scales and end up losing something. I don’t want you treating me differently, Adrien. I don’t want you to back off. I _like_ being your support. I _like_ it when you flirt with me and push my buttons. I _like_ our relationship…. I just wish it came with a happy ending attached. I wish…sometimes it were about more than the fact that I make you feel good. I’m sorry,” Luka interrupted himself. “I’m just dwelling on the negatives. I’m being unfair. I know that you’re always there when I need someone to cheer me up. I know we’re friends and you’re not just using me or whatever. I’m sorry. I’m just…having a sucky day, and I’m tired, and…I need to just stop wallowing and do some yoga or something. Sorry.”

“Hey,” Adrien cooed. “No. You’re okay. You’re allowed to have an off day. Sometimes I feel like…it’s just everything going wrong at once, or everything is piling up on me, and it’s just a bunch of little things, but the little things add up, and then I’m bawling my eyes out because I dropped my favourite pen or my dad had to cancel our dinner plans or something. You’re allowed to break, Luka. You don’t have to be perfect all the time. Isn’t that what you’re always telling me?”

Luka was quiet for a moment as Adrien’s words sank in. He hummed softly. “I guess you’re right.”

“Orpheus, tell me what I need to do to make this better,” Adrien pleaded. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

“It’s fine, Adrien. I’m just being…too sensitive. It’s fine,” Luka assured.

Adrien pursed his lips. “…Are you going to tell Marinette that you’re not okay?”

“No, and you’re not going to tell her either,” Luka growled softly in warning before his voice evened out once more. “Look…there’s nothing concrete that anyone can change to make me feel better. Not Marinette. Not you. I don’t _want_ anything to change before it happens organically on its own. I don’t want to pressure anybody. I don’t want to create problems. Neither you nor Marinette is ready or prepared to have the kind of relationship I want to have, and that’s-that’s fine. It’s okay. It’s just not time yet for everything to work out. I just have to be patient.”

“What? While we both trample you into the dust?” Adrien sighed. “Luc, I don’t want to be the reason you’re unhappy. Just name one thing I can do to help. Please.”

Luka sat up, shaking his head. “This isn’t something you can do for me, Adrien. This is about me needing to take ownership of my feelings. I’m letting myself get down. I’m letting myself mope. I need to take back control and accept that there’s nothing I can do to change other people. I need to accept the situation I’m in and find a way to be at peace with it.”

“People do that?” Adrien wondered, feeling lost.

“Yes. People do that. I’ve done that before. After my father left us…after bad breakups,” Luka confessed quietly. “This is about reframing the problem and resilience.”

“Your mental health skills are worlds beyond mine,” Adrien laughed weakly. “I’m still working on positive self-talk.”

“I started young,” Luka sighed. “Thank God for the library’s self-help section.”

There was a long stretch of silence between them.

“Orpheus?”

“Hm?”

“Are you okay?” Adrien wondered, straining his ears to listen for any little sounds signaling distress.

“Meh,” Luka answered honestly. “Not right now. It’ll get better. I just have to put the work in.”

“Have I told you how awesome you are lately?” Adrien hummed. “Like…you’re awesome. I seriously admire you so much.”

Luka’s cheeks began to heat up. “Yeah?”

“_Yeah_,” Adrien stressed. “You’re my hero.”

“Thanks,” Luka chuckled, some of the stress and misery starting to melt away.

“…Orpheus?”

“Hm?”

“May I come over?”

Luka blinked in surprise and then glanced at the clock. “Adrien, it’s nearly two AM.”

“Please?” Adrien stressed. “I want to see you…. You don’t want to see me?”

“It’s not that, Ariel. Just…” Luka bit his lip, imagining how _pleased_ Juleka would be in the morning when she found out Adrien had been in Luka’s bed…_again_.

“Please?” Adrien whispered. “It’s been a bad day, and my bed is too big. My room’s cold. I swear I’ll be good. Like, seventy-five percent platonic. Please?”

Like always, Luka gave in. “All right. How can I say no?”

“Thank you!” Adrien trilled. “Be there in six minutes. Miss you already.”

“You haven’t even hung up yet,” Luka snickered.

“Hush,” Adrien chided, ringing off.

He took a split second to shoot off a text to his parents to let them know where he’d gone and another fraction of a moment to locate shoes.

Plagg looked up from the tablet he and Nooroo were using to watch movies with a low hiss. “No. Nooroo has never seen It’s a Wonderful Life. You are not interrupting his viewing experience to go canoodle with the boyfriend of the girl you’re in love with.”

“Can’t we just call him my ex or something? Something simpler,” Adrien suggested, toing on his shoes.

“Something that doesn’t remind you that he’s not single and he’s not yours?” Plagg groused, letting Adrien know exactly what he thought of the situation. “Kid, I love you, but what you have going on with Snake-Boy is not what I had envisaged when I first thought it would be a good idea for you two to be friends again. I thought he would be a good companion, a mature role model, someone to ask questions about relationships and mental health and maybe about your attraction to other guys. I thought he’d be a good influence…someone to look up to, someone to have a nice, low-level friend crush on, share a little affection with…. I did not anticipate you getting caught up in this ridiculous love triangle. Kid, I’m telling you, you shouldn’t be doing this.”

Adrien shrugged. “We’ll take the tablet with us. You and Nooroo can settle in under Luka’s bed and keep watching while Luka and I hang out. Bear with me for, like, six minutes, and then you guys can go back to It’s a Wonderful Life, okay?”

Nooroo turned to Plagg and tugged on Plagg’s arm. “Adrien-bocchama’s mood has improved at the thought of visiting his intended. Perhaps we should be supportive? He sleeps better at Monsieur Couffaine’s.”

Plagg clicked his tongue, yanking his arm back as he muttered, “Supportive…. This is _enabling_, Fluttershy. You don’t know how bad this could get. You’ve never had to try to get him to eat and get up out of bed and _failed_,” Plagg growled.

Nooroo looked away. “I could feel it two years ago…their pain at the separation. They feel good when they’re together. I think we should let them feel good, Plagg. There’s no telling what the future holds.”

Plagg let out a little snort. “Fine. Whatever, but if he ends up catatonic again, I’m blaming _you_.” Plagg flew up to Adrien’s eye level. “All right. Let’s do this.”

“Thanks, Plagg,” Adrien chuckled, giving his kwami a little scritch between the ears.

“Yeah, yeah. Don’t forget the tablet,” Plagg groaned, even as he leaned into Adrien’s finger.

Adrien carefully picked up the tablet and showed it to Plagg. “Got it. Okay?”

“Okay,” Plagg grumbled. “Let’s get this over with.”

“Nooroo,” Adrien called. “Transform me!”

With a little gasp, Nooroo was sucked into the single purple bead on Adrien’s ankle bracelet, and a wash of lavender light swept over Adrien.

Plagg’s fur stood on end as he frowned disapprovingly at the result:

A black velvet [top hat](https://www.google.com/search?q=steampunk+top+hat&rlz=1C1SQJL_enUS779US779&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwicxP-um8DlAhVPip4KHWaDAe8Q_AUIEygC&biw=1366&bih=625) decked out with chains and cogs and a pair of goggles perched on the brim.

A smattering of small, silver hoops trailing along the outer shell of the left ear.

Black hair: short in back but full and messy on top with the usual bangs hanging down into electric blue eyes.

No mask. Just the faint [airbrushing](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1SQJL_enUS779US779&tbm=isch&q=butterfly+face+paint&chips=q:butterfly+face+paint,g_1:blue:RaFR2sKECN4%3D&usg=AI4_-kQ1trGfxUPq4YgDmpGoEXqpc5105Q&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwijlIHym8DlAhVDpZ4KHVhTAnYQ4lYINSgG&biw=1366&bih=625&dpr=1) of blue and black butterfly wings starting at the corners under the eyes and following the line of the cheek down.

Clothing in variegated shades of inky black melting into midnight blue, navy, Prussian, sapphire, azure. A vest over a long-sleeved dress shirt. More [belts](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1SQJL_enUS779US779&biw=1366&bih=625&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=h4i3XbP9PNGQtQWiioDgBA&q=steampunk+belts&oq=steampunk+belts&gs_l=img.3..0l2.59238.62980..63522...0.0..0.268.1878.1j13j1......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......0i67.eO8AaZLdroY&ved=0ahUKEwjz3LT4m8DlAhVRSK0KHSIFAEwQ4dUDCAc&uact=5) than necessary looped about the waist. Dress pants tucked into [mid-calf boots](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1SQJL_enUS779US779&biw=1366&bih=625&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=yYi3XZ6GAcrV-gTOp4KQDw&q=steampunk+boots&oq=steampunk+boots&gs_l=img.3..0l10.79571.83136..83349...2.0..0.165.1148.1j9......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......0i67.JmGPkrSYbcA&ved=0ahUKEwjejrWXnMDlAhXKqp4KHc6TAPIQ4dUDCAc&uact=5) decorated with buckles and chains.

The ensemble topped off with a tailcoat in blue and black like a [pipevine swallowtail butterfly](https://www.google.com/search?q=pipevine+swallowtail+butterfly&rlz=1C1SQJL_enUS779US779&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwiJkNGPlMDlAhUD7awKHVPpBNUQ_AUIEigB&biw=1366&bih=625)’s wings.

“You know,” Plagg snorted. “If you wanted steampunk, _we_ could have done steampunk, Kitten. You didn’t have to replace me.”

“I’m not replacing you, Plagg,” Swallowtail sighed, reaching out to scratch under the cat deity’s chin. “Luka likes the aesthetic.”

Plagg rolled his eyes. “Snake-Boy also enjoys staring at your leather-clad butt.”

“_And_ it’s easier to carry the tablet while flying as opposed to traveling via staff,” Swallowtail explained.

“You like flying,” Plagg grumbled, crossing his arms.

“I _really_ like flying,” Swallowtail stressed pleadingly, willing Plagg to understand.

Plagg looked away. “You have a new favourite kwami.”

Swallowtail scooped Plagg up in his palm and raised the kwami to his face to nuzzle. “Plagg, I love you so much. If I lost you, no other kwami would ever be able to fill that void, okay? You will always be number one to me…. Nooroo’s in need of a good, stable, loving home right now, though. He’s been missing and mistreated for nearly two hundred years, so…try not to get jealous when I treat him special. He’s been alone for a long time, and being alone and not feeling like anyone loves you sucks, so…try not to take me being affectionate with him as a slight to you. You know things between us are unshakeable, right, Plagg?”

Plagg took a deep breath and let it out slowly, butting his head up against Swallowtail’s cheek and rubbing. “Yeah. I know we’re solid, Kitten.”

“Good,” Swallowtail sighed in relief. “If it’s really important to you, Plagg, I can detransform and use you instead. Do you need me to do that?”

Plagg shook his head. “Nah. It doesn’t matter so long as you and Nooroo both know that I’m the number one kwami around here. Just give me some really good Camembert later. Now, hurry up and go see your boyfriend already. I bet he’s just wasting away pining after you, waiting for you to come and sweep him off his feet.”

Swallowtail rolled his piercing blue eyes. “Luka’s not some romance novel heroine.”

“Oh. That’s right,” Plagg snickered. “He’s your _Prince Charming_, isn’t he?”

“We’re leaving now,” Swallowtail announced, striding over to the wall of windows and hopping up to the one Adrien always left unlocked. He leapt out into the night, and his tailcoat transformed into wings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NOW WITH ART! Mireille did a lovely little chibi drawing of a scene from this chapter. Check it out on Tumblr here: https://mireilletan.tumblr.com/post/188781918180/hello-have-you-gotten-any-asks-for-the-drawing
> 
> NOW WITH MORE ART! Buggy has done this magnificent drawing of Swallowtail!Adrien. Seriously, the tailcoat is gorgeous! Here: https://pawsomelybuggy.tumblr.com/post/188825262264/messy-scribbles-of-swallowtail-from
> 
> NOW WITH MORE MORE ART! Mireille did Swallowtail!Adrien too, and I love it! ^o^ Here: https://mireilletan.tumblr.com/post/188916437750/swallowtail-aka-adrien-agreste-with-the
> 
> Okay. Now that you've read that, go read MireilleTanaka's rendition of the fake date between Luka and Adrien that Luka briefly mentions in Chapter Four of Jabberwocky. I think you'll really enjoy it. Jabberwocky Improvised: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21178523 . (Thanks again, Mireille!)
> 
> Will anyone be surprised when I say that I hadn't intended for this to be this long? *Cricket noises* Yeah. That's what I thought. I discovered this really cool version of the Deku Palace theme by Theophany while I was searching for an example of Zelda's Lullaby to link for Chapter Eleven, and I thought it would be something Adrien could share with Luka, and they could have a fun, nerdy discussion about video game music, and Adrien could maybe get Luka to play video games with him. And then THIS craziness happened. And then the next chapter which is just as long. And now I'm writing another chapter that follows the next one chronologically. And then, I'm bloody well going to write the scene the way I intended it where Luka and Adrien talk about video games and music. -.-; Yeah. So there will be a lot of updates coming up.
> 
> But I hope you enjoyed this chapter. What did you think? I hate the way Luka texts. It killed me. I text in complete sentences with punctuation and capitalization. I don't think Luka would do that, though, so... It was very difficult for me.
> 
> I also hadn't intended Swallowtail to be making an appearance here first. ^.^; He'll be in Chapter Thirty-Three of Daisy. Oh well. What do you think of the costume? Was my description easy enough to follow and visualize? I always have trouble with describing costumes and clothing in detail. I need reference pictures to help me visualize things.
> 
> Anyway, thank you so much for reading! I'll have another chapter up in the next few days, so see you soon!


	13. Song of Storms

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's a bit of an emotional rollercoaster, but Adrien manages to make Luka feel wanted and appreciated. Much snuggling, teasing, and music ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! Happy Halloween to all those celebrating! To all those not...I'm sorry that you're missing out on dressing up. I'm doing a low-key, office-appropriate Ladybug cosplay. ^.^ The kids aren't dressing up this year because it's going to be too cold to take them walking around. Previous years we've been Alice and Sherlock Holmes, Tinker Bell and Peter Pan, and Dorothy and Scarecrow. I don't know what we'll be next year. Mummsie makes their costumes; I just buy the fabric.
> 
> Anyway! Today's chapter is a continuation of last chapter, so this takes place during Jabberwocky at the end of October, beginning of November. Adrien is eighteen and a half; Luka has just turned twenty-one. Like last chapter, I originally went into this thinking that this wouldn't be canon, so I kind of let myself go a little crazy, but then important things happened that made me think, "Yeah, this really should be canon"...so, again, take this chapter with a grain of salt. ^.^;
> 
> Enjoy!

There was a light tap at Luka’s cabin door before it hesitantly creaked open.

“Ariel, come on i—” Luka’s voice died in his throat as he caught sight of rich blacks and enticing blues. “Swallowtail,” he breathed, taking in the hair, the eyes, the earrings, the belts, the boots.

His eyes lingered on the wings the longest.

Swallowtail smirked, pulling the door closed behind him and giving a model turn to show off the ensemble.

The wings gave a slow beat, making their iridescence shimmer in the low light of the cabin.

“Hello, Civilian,” Swallowtail purred, still coming off very Chat Noir despite his change in attire. “Like what you see?”

Luka slid off the bed and cautiously approached, stretching out a hand hesitantly towards the wings. He looked to Swallowtail for permission.

Swallowtail snickered. “Go ahead. The answer is yes, just like the first five times you’ve asked me. What makes you think I’m suddenly going to start saying no?”

Luka shrugged, extending his arm to gently run his fingers over Swallowtail’s right wing. “It’s _your_ body. I don’t want to just assume I have a free pass that never expires. What if one day you don’t feel like being touched?”

Swallowtail stared at him with a hint of incredulity. “_Me_? Not want to be touched?”

Luka shrugged. “Could happen.”

“Yeah. Right after Hell freezes over,” Swallowtail snorted. “Do you know how much time and energy and mental power I put into getting you to touch me?”

Luka slowly looked up from the wing to meet Swallowtail’s eyes. “…You never know.”

“Detransformation.”

Adrien was barely Adrien again before he launched himself at Luka, wrapping the older boy in a tight embrace. “Hey, Orpheus.” He touched his forehead to Luka’s.

“Hey, Ariel,” Luka whispered, letting go of a little more of the tension he’d been feeling that day. “You doing okay?” Luka pulled back to study Adrien’s expression and run a thumb along Adrien’s cheekbone.

Adrien grinned. “Me? I’m fine.”

Luka’s eyebrows inched together in confusion. “But…when you were pleading to come over…?”

“Oh, that,” Adrien chuckled, taking Luka by the wrist and tugging gently, guiding Luka back to the bed. “_I’m_ fine. Yeah, I was kind of in a mood, a little mixed up concerning my feelings for you and Marinette, but…I’m here for _you_.”

“Okay. This is all very nice, but us kwamis are going to go watch movies now,” Plagg snorted as he got Nooroo to help him drag the tablet into the drawer compartment under Luka’s bed where a nice kwami space had been created for when they visited.

“Behave you two!” Nooroo sang with a smile and a wave.

Luka returned the wave and then looked back to Adrien, puzzled. “You’re here…for _me_?”

Adrien sat Luka down on the bed and kicked off his own shoes before joining him. “_You_ are the one who’s not fine, so I’m here to make it better.” Adrien reached up and slowly began to stroke Luka’s face: the ears, the cheeks, the jawline, the lips.

Luka’s eyes widened half in alarm, half in captivation. “O-Oh? How?”

Adrien shrugged, starting to feel a little nervous. “However you need. You’re always the one supporting me, Luka, letting me whine at you and holding me and petting my hair and saying exactly what I need to hear…. You’re always whatever I need you to be. Tonight, I want to be that for you. So…just tell me what to do. Take whatever you need from me.”

Luka gulped and had to look away. This was too much. He wasn’t emotionally prepared for what exactly “take whatever you need from me” meant…what it would mean if he really did take what he needed only to have it ripped away with the coming of the dawn, never to be his again.

Adrien cursed softly at the look on Luka’s face and dropped his hands to his lap. “I’m so sorry. I’m screwing this up, aren’t I? I’m making it worse. I’m sorry, Orpheus. I don’t know how to be someone else’s emotional support. I just—”

“—Shh,” Luka shushed sibilantly as he pulled Adrien in tight. “Shh. It’s…fine. This is just…I don’t know what to do with this. I don’t think I really know how to let someone else support me emotionally. I’m so used to just doing it all myself.”

“Okay,” Adrien breathed, pulling back slowly to meet Luka’s gaze. “So…let’s just…figure this out together?”

“I don’t know if this is something I should be doing,” Luka confessed. “I don’t know if I should be here, feeling emotionally wrecked with you comforting me.”

Adrien clicked his tongue. “If this is about supposedly cheating on Marinette…Orpheus, your whole problem sounds like it’s that no one is giving you the love and affection you’re craving. If she won’t kiss you, _I _will. You deserve affection more than anyone I know, Luka, and it really ticks me off that she’s not taking care of you. Just forget about her for a few hours.”

Luka shook his head, scooting back. “I think this was a mistake. I’m fine, Adrien, and I think you need to go home.”

“Luka,” Adrien sighed, crawling forward to make up the ground.

“No,” Luka replied firmly, putting out a hand to halt Adrien’s advance. “Thank you for coming and worrying about me and trying to help, but I am in a relationship right now. I love my girlfriend, and I told her I would be okay waiting and being patient until her feelings matched mine, and I am not going back on that now.”

Especially not when giving in to Adrien wouldn’t end any better. What Adrien was proposing was a bandage, not a lasting cure. Adrien wasn’t thinking about building a life together, raising children, and taking on the world side by side. Adrien was thinking of affection and flirting and dates. He was thinking about the next few months, not years in the future.

And Luka couldn’t let himself forget that Adrien wasn’t bisexual. Adrien wasn’t interested in the same full scope of a relationship that Luka wanted. Adrien would never be Luka’s husband, his mate. It was for the best that Luka nip this in the bud to keep from getting hurt in the future.

“Thank you, Adrien,” Luka added more gently. “I love you so much for you wanting to take care of me…but I can’t accept this. Okay?”

Adrien nodded wordlessly, ducking his head as he turned away, arms crossing in front, palms cradling elbows in an approximation of a self-hug as he made himself small.

Luka sighed, knowing Adrien was taking this as a personal rejection. “Ariel, think out loud. Talk me through the downward spiral going on in your head because I bet you anything I can stop it.”

“I’m useless,” Adrien mumbled, voice unsteady. “I can’t do anything right. Like, _anything_. I guess I’m good at throwing money at problems like my dad, but I’m a huge failure at something simple like cheering someone up. And I feel stupid because now I’m getting upset about being useless, and you’re going to end up comforting me like usual when I was supposed to be here to comfort you. So I’m just ending up being a burden to you, and I’m not making you feel better like I wanted at all.” Adrien paused to smile miserably up at Luka.

“That’s what’s going on in my head,” Adrien announced, pasting on a smile that eerily resembled an open wound. “So go ahead and start comforting me and saying just exactly the right thing like you always do. Show me how wonderful you are…how inadequate I am.”

Luka winced. “Oh, Adrien.”

Adrien shook his head, getting to his feet. “Sorry. I know you’re having a sucky day. I didn’t mean to add to it. Listen, I’m gonna go sleep on the couch. Plagg and Nooroo would be mad at me if I interrupted their movie marathon again to go home especially after the stink Plagg made about coming here in the first place, and I kind of texted my parents that I was coming over here so that they’d know where I was when I didn’t come down for breakfast in the morning, and I really don’t want to have to explain to them that I came back because I’m such a screwup. Sorry again. Night, night,” Adrien rushed to get out, not bothering to slip his shoes back on as he beat a hasty retreat.”

“Perfect Fifth,” Luka called after him, making Adrien freeze and turn around curiously.

Adrien arched an eyebrow at the old nickname. It always meant something when Luka tossed Adrien a shred of their past intimacy.

Luka bit his lip.

Adrien waited.

“I’m lying through my teeth about being fine,” Luka confessed, meeting Adrien’s eyes. “I’m really tired of waiting to be loved how I want to experience love. I’m sick of being a saint and denying myself. Being good is killing me.”

Luka opened his arms to Adrien, inviting him back in.

Slowly, hesitantly, Adrien climbed up on the bed and into Luka’s embrace.

“Okay,” Adrien whispered, staring deep into Luka’s aquatic eyes. “Help me. I only know what _I_ like, what makes _me_ feel better. Help me make this about you.”

Luka nearly died of a heart attack on the spot. His pulse shot through the ceiling, and he couldn’t remember how to inhale. “G-Ground rules,” he gasped, reminding himself, “Obviously, no sex. Because you don’t sleep with other guys, so no sex.”

“Right,” Adrien confirmed.

“Nothing below the belt. No intentional touching below the waist,” Luka clarified, and Adrien nodded. “No kissing.”

Adrien groaned in frustration.

“You want this to be about me?” Luka challenged.

Adrien nodded, eyeing Luka curiously.

“Okay. No kissing because kissing is the kind of thing that will make me feel awful and hate myself when I wake up tomorrow,” Luka explained.

Adrien’s eyes widened, and he nodded in understanding. “Okay. No kissing.”

“No biting. No marks,” Luka continued. “I just…make me feel like you want me. She doesn’t want me,” His voice broke, crumbling into a rushed whisper. “and it is _shredding_ my self-esteem. It’s getting better, but she feels awkward and guilty about every caress. I know she cares about me and that this is about what’s going on in her head and that it’s not about me, but…I have never felt so unwanted and not good enough in my life. So…help.”

Adrien leaned in and licked away the tears, hands stroking Luka’s hair, face, neck, arms, back. He nuzzled Luka’s jawline, tongue gently licking at Luka’s throat like an affectionate kitten. One hand went to Luka’s hair to rub soothing, looping patterns against Luka’s scalp while the other took up residence at the small of Luka’s back, slowly snaking its way under Luka’s shirt.

Luka gasped at the sudden overwhelming onslaught of physical attention. It had been about six months since he’d last truly made out with a significant other…about two and a half years since he’d last had sex. He hadn’t felt a strong enough emotional connection to anyone he’d dated since Adrien, and now…suddenly it was too much and not enough. He’d been right to set ground rules while his brain was still somewhat functional, otherwise he was pretty sure that he’d have Adrien’s tongue down his throat at that moment and not be complaining about it.

Still, he should probably clarify that licking wasn’t—

Adrien’s tongue found the pulse point on Luka’s neck, sending a jolt through his system, causing Luka’s fingers to tighten their grip on Adrien’s hip and shoulder respectively.

Luka bared his throat to Adrien, making the executive decision to forget about the injunction on licking.

Adrien nuzzled the base of Luka’s neck and began to purr.

Luka melted at the sound, letting the vibrations of Adrien’s chest and throat flood his senses. His eyes fluttered closed, and he sighed happily.

Adrien chuckled, audibly pleased with himself. “Feeling good?”

“Mmmm,” Luka hummed blissfully.

“What can I do to make it better?” Adrien whispered against the shell of Luka’s ear, eliciting a shiver.

Luka bit his lip, forcing his eyes open to meet Adrien’s gaze. “You can say no, but…can we lose the clothing? Uh—I mean, not the boxers, but…feeling your skin against mine would be nice. You can say no, but…may I undress you?”

Adrien pretended to consider for a second before nodding.

He got the feeling that this was a big deal to Luka. It was more than the countless times Adrien had changed in front of Luka before, more than how they used to sleep in their boxers when Adrien had spent the night that summer they’d first been friends. Undressing someone was clearly significant whereas getting undressed in front of someone wasn’t necessarily, even though the end result of Adrien wearing only boxers was the same.

Luka looked surprised. “You’re sure?”

Adrien nodded again, putting on a shy smile.

He kept his mouth shut about how he’d been modeling his whole life and how people dressing and undressing him had _never_ been a big deal.

Luka’s hands shook as he carefully took hold of Adrien’s sweater and gently pulled it up over Adrien’s head.

Luka’s breath caught in his throat as he finally let himself openly stare. He’d seen shirtless Adrien before, and he’d snuck surreptitious glances, stolen peeks when he could. He’d gazed at fashion ads featuring Adrien with his shirt unbuttoned and hanging open, but Luka had never allowed himself to just stare outright and admire in person.

Suddenly, Adrien started to feel like this _was_ a big deal. This wasn't the business as usual, let’s get you out of that and into this and back out on the runway, clinical undressing he was used to. This was one hundred percent intimate and sacred and special.

Adrien’s cheeks slowly started to resemble evening light filtering in through red stained glass. “I’m not a sculpture in a museum, you know,” he whispered, taking the sweater from Luka’s hand and tossing it to the floor, freeing the hand so that Adrien could take it and guide it up to rest on his arm. “You can touch as well as look.”

“S-Sorry,” Luka laughed nervously. “I just…this is a little surreal."

“Want me to make it more surreal by taking _your_ shirt off?” Adrien suggested playfully, voice low.

Luka’s face went artificial cherry red, providing an interesting contrast with his cerulean hair. Unable to find his voice, Luka nodded.

Adrien bit his lip, hesitating as he reached out for Luka’s shirt hem. “You know, I don’t think I’ve ever taken someone else’s clothes off before.”

Luka blinked, floored. “You’re still a virgin?”

Adrien shrugged and cautiously began to tug Luka’s nightshirt up and over his head. “Just because plenty of people want me doesn’t mean there’s been anyone _I’ve_ wanted…besides the obvious.”

“I can relate,” Luka mumbled, distracted.

Adrien set Luka’s shirt aside and surveyed the expanse of pale skin before him. He smiled. “Do you work out? You’re really toned.”

Adrien reached out to touch but then paused, looking up for Luka’s permission.

“P5, that is the whole _point_ of this exercise,” Luka chuckled. “Hands above the waist, but, otherwise, have at it.”

Adrien grinned. “I love it when you call me P5.” He pushed Luka down on the bed and resumed nuzzling and caressing, letting his hands roam.

Adrien got so caught up in the moment, in Luka, that his mind stopped reflexively counting the seconds. An undeterminable amount of time later, Adrien pulled back to remark, “Your muscles are really tight. Do you ever get a massage?”

Luka laughed. “Rich people get massages, Perfect Fifth. The rest of us are busy paying for university and groceries. No offence.”

Adrien stuck out his tongue. “You know, one day you’re going to be rich too, and you’re not going to be able to tease me anymore.”

“One can only hope,” Luka sighed.

“Roll over and rest your head on my thigh,” Adrien commanded. “I’m giving you a massage.”

Hesitantly, Luka obeyed.

Adrien’s hands slowly started to slide over Luka’s skin, kneading and circling and rubbing and pressing, gradually persuading every single muscle in Luka’s back to let go of the tension it had been holding. Once Adrien was done with Luka’s back, he moved up to the neck and shoulders.

Luka liquified, mind evaporating in a dreamy haze of pleasure.

Adrien worked on Luka’s scalp and ears before systematically moving down Luka’s arms, hands, fingers.

Luka groaned as Adrien worked at Luka’s palms with the pads of his thumbs.

“Roll over,” Adrien whispered, and Luka did so that Adrien could get a better angle on the muscles of Luka’s neck as well as the pectorals and face.

Adrien’s fingers eventually slowed to a stop until they were just absentmindedly stroking Luka’s hair. “How was that?” he chuckled, proud of the look of utter satisfaction he’d put on Luka’s face.

_“Maybe I’m not such a screwup after all. I managed to do this much right.”_

“That,” Luka sighed, giving a stretch. “was better than any of the sex I’ve ever had.”

Adrien bit his lip. He wanted to ask, “even with Honoré?” but he didn’t dare. Honoré had destroyed Luka when he’d left him, and Adrien didn’t want to risk bringing _him_ into this moment between the two of them.

“That’s pretty high praise,” Adrien replied instead. “I think you’re exaggerating. You’re going to give me an inflated ego.”

Luka snickered, capturing Adrien’s hand and gently running his thumb back and forth over it. “You’d have to have self-esteem to begin with for that.” The teasing smile left his face as he looked up and met Adrien’s eye. “…Thank you. Thank you for this…. You are a literal angel. I don’t even…I can’t tell you how much this means to me. Adrien, I’ve felt like I’m drowning, and…”

He reached up to caress Adrien’s cheek, and they just stared into one another’s eyes.

“You’re really precious to me, Orpheus,” Adrien whispered. “I know it’s not exactly what you want. I know it’s not passion and lovemaking and commitment along with all the softer moments that make up ‘love’ for you…but how I feel about you _is_ a type of love. …I hope that means something to you because it means something to me.”

Luka nodded, stressing, “It does, P5. I’m so sorry if I ever made you feel like it didn’t.”

Adrien took a deep breath. “Okay…. Luc, I don’t want you to get to the point where you feel this bad again. If you ever need someone to pay attention to you and remind you that you are literally the second coming of Mozart,”

Luka cracked up, giving Adrien’s hand a squeeze.

“just tell me,” Adrien insisted. “I will happily rip your shirt off and give you a massage whenever you need one.”

Luka curled up on his side, laughing into Adrien’s thigh.

“Seriously,” Adrien snickered. “Never, ever let yourself get to that point again.”

Luka gazed up with a besotted smile. He took Adrien’s hand and pressed it to his lips. “I love you so much, P5.”

Adrien’s face glowed, a light pink spreading over his cheeks like a field of nadeshiko flowers. “I love you too.” The words left his lips so naturally that it was five full seconds before he caught himself, going pale. “I’m sorry,” he gasped, beginning to panic. “Am I allowed to say that?”

Luka gave Adrien’s hand another squeeze. “Shhh, P5. It’s okay. You can say it so long as we both know that it means something different when I say it.”

Adrien nodded even as he wondered a touch bitterly why his love for Luka didn’t get to be as valid or meaningful just because Adrien wasn’t interested in sex or marriage. Why were Adrien’s feelings somehow lesser?

Out of the blue, Adrien remembered the difference between what he had meant when he told Marinette that he loved her as opposed to what Marinette had meant when she’d said those same words to Adrien.

“Are you okay, Perfect Fifth?”

Luka’s voice pulled Adrien back, and he smiled, running a hand through Luka’s hair. “Yeah. Just tired. Long day. I’m okay, though. I feel…I feel good right now.”

Luka nodded, a wide grin stretching across his face. “Yeah. Me too…. Were you ready to try to go to sleep, or could I possibly…?” Luka bit his lip, eyes flitting across the room to the small army of instruments on the other side of Luka’s desk.

“What? Write a song?” Adrien snickered. “Did I a_muse_ you?”

“Always,” Luka chuckled, slowly pushing himself up to seated. “I just…” His fingers twitched in a way that Adrien had come to read as an insatiable itch to have an instrument in his hands.

“Go,” Adrien groaned, smacking Luka on the shoulder.

“Thank you,” Luka laughed, ghosting a kiss to Adrien’s cheek as he scrambled off the bed over to his menagerie.

“You are _such _a musician.” Adrien rolled his eyes. “I bet you drive your lovers crazy. You don’t do this in the middle of sex, do you?”

“What? No!” Luka hissed as he studied the instruments, mentally testing out the timbre of each in his head, weighing each instrument’s strengths to determine its suitability to play the tune buzzing around in Luka’s ears. “You don’t just…” He picked up a flute case and held it for a moment before shaking his head and setting it back down on top of the pile. “You don’t stop in the middle of sex to write music. You have to wait until afterwards.”

“Ooooh,” Adrien hummed, curling up around one of Luka’s pillows to watch as Luka picked up and put down, in turn, an oboe, an alto sax, and a mandolin. “So…you’ve just _wanted_ to stop in the middle of sex to write music.”

Luka turned to glare at the half-naked boy in his bed.

Adrien smirked. “Yes or no?”

“Yessss,” Luka hissed, going back to the instruments.

“Either that was some bad sex or a really good song.” Adrien curled and uncurled his toes, his top foot swinging back and forth like the rhythmic twitching of a cat’s tail.

“The sex was fine, thank you,” Luka grumbled, chewing on his bottom lip and tapping his fingers against his thigh irately as he scanned the instrument selection again. “I’m just weird like that.”

“You’re just a _genius_ like that,” Adrien revised. “When you’re a genius, you’re not ‘weird’, you’re ‘quirky’. _You_…are quirky, Orpheus…and it’s beautiful…unless _I’m_ the one you’re having sex with and running out on. Then you’re dumb and totally broken up with. Just warning you.”

Luka clapped a hand over his mouth, stifling his giggle fit. He looked back at Adrien with a goofy smile. “Sorry. In this alternate reality where I’m having sex with you, _you_ are the only thing that exists in the universe, the sole focus of my attention. _You_ **are** the music.”

Adrien’s heart tripped. Something lurched in his chest and headed south, stirring up all kinds of feelings, all kinds of things.

Internally, Adrien began to panic. This had never happened before. At least, he’d never had that kind of reaction to another _guy_ before, and, really, it typically took a very special girl to get him riled up, so…

Adrien did a quick sexual orientation check. The idea of actually taking the rest of his clothes off and doing something about the situation in his pants with Luka was… No. Ick. Terrifying. No. So…what the heck did his body think it was doing?

Thankfully, Luka hadn’t noticed anything amiss and was back to his search for the perfect instrument to create his new song.

Adrien took a deep breath. _“Ignore it, and it will go away. Focus now. Freak out later.”_

He cleared his throat and attempted to distract himself. “What kind of song are you trying to create? Can you maybe sing the melody line?”

Luka gave a little sigh and halted his search to hum a sweet, playful tune that made Adrien think of a clearing in the woods on a sunny afternoon with birdsong and a burbling brook. There was the hint of something magical about it, though, as if impish fairies might be peeking out of the bushes and snickering. Then the siren leitmotif came in, completing the air of mystery and seduction and danger.

“Something like that,” Luka announced as he trailed off. “Maybe up an octave.”

“I think you want a violin,” Adrien suggested.

Luka raised an eyebrow. “You think?”

Adrien nodded. “What other instrument is going to give you that kind of range? I mean, you could use a flute for the soaring notes, but I think a flute is too…sharp a sound maybe. Too piercing. The violin is softer, more sultry, but you can still make it whistle playing [flautando](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FpAK0K2W-qA) or using [harmonics](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ue90f5r-2Qw). Not that I have any idea what I’m talking about.” Adrien shrugged. “I don’t play flute or violin, so…”

Luka smiled as he took his violin out of its case and brought it over to the bed. “You know more than you let on,” Luka tsked as he checked the tuning and made some minor adjustments.

It reminded Adrien of his brother Félix when he used to play when Adrien was little.

A lump started to form in Adrien’s throat, unexpected emotion bubbling up from his childhood, from the ten years he and his brother had been separated, estranged, cut off. So much feeling evoked by simple tuning.

“You okay, P5,” Luka called softly, zeroing in on the shift in Adrien.

Adrien smiled and shook his head. “Just remembering. It’s silly.”

Luka bit his lip, carefully entering the minefield. “Félix?”

Adrien nodded.

“Is he still calling to check in with you periodically?” Luka tested the waters. “You said he’d been keeping in touch since they came in July. Is he still…?”

“Yeah. Yes,” Adrien laughed, feeling ridiculous. “He calls me every week, separate from Bridgette and Noëlle, even. I don’t know why I’m getting teary over here. It’s…fine. Dad was talking about moving them to Paris for Christmas. I’m just…being separated from someone for ten years is hard…missing out on all that time together.”

Adrien paused to meet Luka’s gaze. “…Being kept away from someone for _two_ years is hard…all the what ifs and might-have-beens.”

Luka set down the violin and bow and crawled over to Adrien, pulling Adrien back against him. “I hear you.”

“I would have messed it up anyway,” Adrien sighed, leaning back to rest his head against Luka’s. “It’s probably a good thing my father ripped us apart before I could destroy everything.”

“No,” Luka snorted. “You wouldn’t have messed anything up. We would have made it work. We would have made it.”

Adrien hummed skeptically. “I was an idiot, confused and not ready to be everything you wanted me to be…kind of like right now. Funny how little has changed.” Adrien glanced sideways at Luka. “We’re not making it work right now either.”

“We’re not dating,” Luka muttered, cheeks heating up.

“Officially,” Adrien added, turning his head to lick Luka’s cheek.

“Ariel,” Luka sighed.

Adrien pushed away, breaking out of Luka’s hold. He let the pillow he’d been curled around drop to the floor as he took a few steps and then stopped to laugh bitterly. “I see I’m ‘Ariel’ again. I don’t like it when you call me that. It’s like a reminder that things are different now because I screwed up and didn’t find some other way to protect you from my father.”

“It’s not like that,” Luka stressed, coming over to pull Adrien back against him and wrap his arms around him once more. “Shhhh, Perfect Fifth.”

Adrien made a small, thoughtful noise. “All right. I’ll shh…but only if I can be your perfect fifth until dawn. After that, I’ll go back to being Ariel without a fight, but…until the sun comes up…remember who just gave you a backrub that was allegedly better than sex.”

Luka snorted in laughter as he gave Adrien a squeeze and gently tugged him back over to the bed. “Come on. I was about to compose a song about your prowess in bed.”

Adrien scooped the pillow off the floor and hugged it to his chest, situating himself up against the wall at the head of the bed. “All right. I’m ready. Serenade me about how good I am without even having to take my clothes off.”

Luka shook his head with an indulgent smile and took up his violin and bow. He tucked the violin under his chin and slowly began to experiment, transferring the notes in his head onto the strings.

“You were right about the violin,” Luka hummed, eyes closed as he drained the music in his mind into the violin. “I usually think of it as my crying instrument, but this is it. This is the voice this melody needed to soar.”

“You’ll find that I’m right on occasion,” Adrien snickered, enjoying the view.

Luka shirtless was beautiful. Luka shirtless with muscles rippling as he played the violin was living art.

Adrien really, really wanted to make out with this man, relationship status be damned.

The main theme of the song started to develop, and Adrien’s ears perked up, momentarily distracted from the magnificent eye candy in front of him. Luka’s song was starting to remind Adrien of something else, a song _he_ had started two years prior but had set aside when the sting of losing Luka had started to fade into numb resignation. Adrien had picked it back up again several months ago when he and Luka had been reunited…when Adrien had discovered that Luka was dating Marinette. It was a song about Luka and the way he made Adrien feel. The warmth and the strength, the support and the acceptance.

Adrien got to his feet and went over to the keyboard, carefully rolling it up beside the bed.

Luka, who had opened his eyes when he felt the bed shift as Adrien got up, arched an eyebrow at his companion.

“Keep playing. I want to try something, if it’s okay?” He looked to Luka for permission.

“I’m always happy to play a duet with you,” Luka chuckled, throwing in a wink. “Anytime.”

Adrien rolled his eyes as he turned the volume knob down low. He took a deep breath, waited for the melodic line to come around again, and started to play.

As suspected, Adrien’s song slipped seamlessly underneath Luka’s whistling melody. Adrien’s piano soared as Luka’s violin swooped down to meet it. Back and forth their parts intertwined and complimented and flattered and flirted.

It didn’t work exactly as Adrien had originally written it. He had to adapt bits here and there to sync with Luka’s notes, but, on the whole, it was uncanny how beautifully they seemed to fit.

“You have gotten worlds better at improvisation!” Luka praised, a giddy lilt to his voice.

Adrien blushed. “I’m not improvising. Well…not much.”

“What do you mean? You’re _not_ making this up?” Luka frowned.

Adrien shook his head. “Well, I’m changing the parts that don’t fit what you’re playing, but…the complete underlying structure of the song is already there. This is something I’ve been working on. You just happen to be playing the perfect accompaniment.”

Luka whistled low and long. “Adrien Agreste, what did I tell you? You’re a genius composer when you get your dad’s voice out of your head telling you that you can’t do it.”

Adrien blushed, focusing on the notes. “I don’t know. It’s not _that_ good. It’s not like something _you’d_ write.”

Luka snorted. “I am literally co-creating this with you as we speak. This collaboration is _exactly_ like something I’d write.”

They stopped talking for a moment as Luka picked up the pace, gliding up in a shimmering shower of notes that sounded clear and bell-like.

“What’s the song called?” Luka hummed, leaning into the notes as he played

“I didn’t name it.” Adrien shifted on the bed, cheeks lighting up in embarrassment. “But…this is you.”

The violin part suddenly dropped out, but Adrien kept playing.

“M-Me?” Luka gulped, turning to stare as Adrien’s fingers slid up and down the keyboard in a rolling, vibrant wash of sound.

Adrien looked back at Luka and smiled, nodding. “You. How I see you. What you feel like to me. This is you.” He started over from the beginning and played it how he’d originally composed it, eyes going half-lidded as he melted into the song.

The piece ran about three and a half minutes, and Luka sat there and listened in awed silence, letting Adrien’s perception of him fill his senses. It wasn’t hard. Adrien’s notes surrounded them, enveloping them in their pure, joyful, unconditional love.

It left Luka breathless, wanting to pull Adrien down on top of him and hold on forever. He couldn’t verbalize everything he was feeling. He couldn’t put even a fraction of it into words. “Marry me” was the closest he could get, but he knew that was inadvisable in their current situation.

“It’s beautiful,” he managed. “Painfully, ethereally beautiful. I wish I had better words to describe it. French doesn’t do it justice, Angel. You…You have no idea how much it means to me that you wrote this about me, that this—_this_!—is how you see _me_. I can’t even…” Luka shook his head, scooting closer to take Adrien’s hand and kiss it. “I don’t have the right words to thank you. Just…thank you, Perfect Fifth.”

Adrien turned to Luka and smiled gently. “I’m just glad you liked it.”

“I _love_ it,” Luka snorted at the inadequacy of even “love”.

Adrien took Luka’s hands and pulled them in closer, pressing little kisses to the knuckles. “Did I make you feel special tonight?” Adrien hummed.

Luka nodded.

“Did I make you feel needed?” Adrien ran down the list.

Luka nodded harder.

“Did I make you feel wanted?” Adrien smiled fondly at the lovestruck expression on Luka’s face.

“God, yes,” Luka whimpered.

“Good,” Adrien chuckled, giving Luka’s hands a squeeze before letting go. “It sounds like ‘mission accomplished’, then…so we should probably tidy up and go to sleep. I don’t want to ruin this by kissing you and making you feel bad in the morning because, going by the look on your face right now, you wouldn’t put up much of a fight if I pushed you down and tried to remove your tonsils with my tongue. Would you?” Adrien challenged.

Luka gave a little whine as he shook his head.

“Yeah. Didn’t think so,” Adrien whispered. “But I don’t want you to regret tonight.”

He took Luka by the chin and held him still to prevent any accidents as he pressed a hard kiss to Luka’s cheek.

Adrien pulled back slowly with a shy smile.

“I regret nothing,” Luka breathed, feeling like he was floating.

“Mm,” Adrien sang happily, a dreamy look in his eyes. “Good. Now put away your violin, and let’s go to sleep. It’s nearly three thirty.”

With a little sigh, Luka obeyed.

Adrien wheeled the keyboard back up against the far wall, and Luka carefully tucked his violin and bow into their case before walking them over to their place in the instrument pile.

As he passed his desk, Luka noticed his phone lighting up with the second notification of a new text, the latest in a string. With a frown, he picked up his phone and opened the messages from Juleka.

“rose wants me 2 tell u u should break up with marinette & d8 adrien bc u 2 sound happier 2gether”

Luka blinked and proceeded to the next text, bewildered as to why his sister was passing this message along.

“i think u 2 make beautiful music 2gether”

Luka smiled and typed back, “thanks lil sis” “<3”.

“Who are you texting?” Adrien’s fingers skimmed along Luka’s bare back as he walked by on his way to the bed, making Luka’s skin vibrate.

“Uh…just Juleka. She and Rose like the song,” Luka abridged.

“Oh, God. We didn’t wake them up, did we?” Adrien winced. “Was that a sarcastic ‘we like the song’ where she’s trying to tell us to ‘get the expletive in bed already’?”

“No, no,” Luka assured, hitting the light before slipping into the bed, taking his side by the wall. “They actually like the song.”

“Oh,” Adrien breathed in relief. “Good. I don’t want to give Juleka any more reason to despise me.”

“P5, she doesn’t despise you,” Luka sighed. “She’s just…got her guard up. She likes you.”

Adrien clicked his tongue. “She _used_ to like me. Now…I’m that guy who’s friends with her girlfriend and sometimes ends up in her brother’s bed. Perhaps ‘despise’ is a gross overstatement, but she definitely doesn’t like me. But I don’t want to talk about your sister. I’m in bed with _you_, Pretty Boy.”

“Don’t tease, P5,” Luka groaned.

“I never tease,” Adrien promised, smiling impishly as he inched closer to Luka until their knees brushed under the covers.

Luka bumped his forehead against Adrien’s, “Goodnight, My Perfect Fifth.”

“Goodnight, _My_ Perfect Fifth,” Adrien echoed, much to Luka’s surprise. Adrien only grinned. “What? I mean, it goes both ways, right?”

Luka nodded speechlessly.

“Night,” Adrien repeated, swooping in for a quick kiss to Luka’s forehead before letting his eyes slide closed.

Surprisingly, even with Adrien in bed beside him (or perhaps _because of_ Adrien in the bed beside him), Luka quickly drifted off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These two are a beautiful mess, aren't they? ^.^; What did you think? I hope the chapter was enjoyable.
> 
> It was nice for me to write Luka finally getting a little bit of a release from all the pressure he's been under. I'm really excited for Jabberwocky to progress to the point where I can write the Lukadrienette scenes. Poor Marinette always gets cut out because I'm too busy focusing on Adrien or Luka. ^.^; I'd like to get to show what the heck she's up to more.
> 
> Chapter title song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xI85qVg2l9w
> 
> I think I've decided that I don't like remixes of Song of Storms because I'm too attached to the original. (There was an electro swing version that was kind of cool, though.) The kids don't seem to approve of any of the dozen we listened to either. My daughter Eiko especially is not happy. Song of Storms is their favourite lullaby when it's storming or there are fireworks and Noiz is freaking out.
> 
> I think this version is beautiful, though, and it kind of fits the tempestuous character of Luka and Adrien's relationship at this point. Beautiful and tragic.
> 
> Thank you for reading everyone! I'll see you all again soon. 
> 
> References:  
Flautando: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FpAK0K2W-qA  
Harmonics: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ue90f5r-2Qw  
Harmonics Ray Chen: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bp6q-d0nnu4


	14. Bolero of Fire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning after, things return to normal...ish.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello friends! I hope you're having a pleasant Monday. Mine is so-so. Thank you so much for your kudos and comments and bookmarks, guys. The love is much appreciated, and I'm super pleased that you're enjoying these snippets. After all the fluff of last chapter, we're back to our regularly scheduled programming with Adrien's continued sexuality crisis and more fluff and angst in this chapter. Enjoy!
> 
> This chapter is a direct continuation of the last two, so it also takes place during Jabberwocky in late October, early November. Adrien is eighteen and a half, and Luka has just turned twenty-one. I think, at this point, I'm resigned to the fact that these three chapters need to be canon because they're kind of important. ^.^; Sorry for airing them out of order. I'm just as bad as the show, it seems.

Adrien awoke to the smell of pine and Luka’s hair smushed to the side of his face. He took a deep inhale and tried not to concentrate too much on the hand currently palming his posterior.

Usually, when they ended up cuddling or puppy piling in their sleep, Adrien’s head found Luka’s chest or stomach, and Luka’s hands normally ended up in Adrien’s hair or on Adrien’s back or shoulder blades. At least…to the best of Adrien’s knowledge they did. Luka typically woke up first, though, so it was conceivable that Luka had adjusted their position before Adrien regained consciousness.

Adrien wondered if Luka had a nice butt. It _looked_ like the butt right off a sculpture of Apollo, but Adrien wondered what it felt like. He wasn’t in the habit of grabbing other people’s behinds, so he didn’t have a large pool of experience to draw from.

He gazed down at Luka’s peaceful, dreaming face and smiled, carefully propping himself up on his elbows to play with Luka’s hair and stroke Luka’s face.

Luka didn’t stir. True, they’d only been asleep four or five hours after a rough day and draining evening, but Luka was _out_.

“I love you,” Adrien giggled breathily. “Even if I don’t want all the same things you want.”

He held his breath and cautiously leaned in to press a butterfly kiss that was more air than substance to Luka’s lips. He pulled back, fully expecting to be caught red-handed, but Luka was still heavily asleep.

Adrien bit his lip, watching Luka’s face for any signs of stirring as his hand found Luka’s hip under the covers and incrementally started to slide down.

It really was a nice butt: soft but firm, subtly toned like the rest of Luka.

In his sleep, Luka gave a little moan that sounded like “—ien” as he arched his back. He was warm and hard against Adrien’s thigh. It had been a light pressure before, but now Adrien could really feel it, and he felt guilty for taking advantage while Luka was asleep. Luka always got so embarrassed when they were snuggling and this happened, even if it was just reflexive.

Adrien quickly slid his palm back up to an acceptable position, removed Luka’s hand from his own behind, and shifted his hips back to relieve some of the pressure his thigh was putting between Luka’s legs.

This was nice…waking up in someone’s arms, feeling connected to another person, being a part of something bigger than just Adrien, part of an “us”. He wished he could make it permanent. It would be for the best, after all. Luka would be happier with Adrien. Adrien could (finally) do something better than Marinette. Adrien could make Luka happy.

Adrien frowned.

Maybe not. The night before, it sounded as if Adrien made Luka just as miserable as Marinette when Luka had described the boy and the girl he was in love with.

Maybe Adrien could…try harder? _He_ was the problem, after all. He was the one not taking this seriously. Luka wanted to marry Adrien. …What did Adrien want?

He chewed on his lip as he played with Luka’s bangs.

Adrien wanted…acceptance, affection. He wanted almost exactly what he had with Luka now only with kissing and wandering hands and none of the guilt. Adrien wanted exclusivity. He wanted dates and hand-holding and public displays of affection. He wanted stability and a future together.

That sounded a lot like marriage in many respects…didn’t it? Not that Adrien was necessarily ready for that step at the age of eighteen. He kind of wanted to date and be young and get through university, get his foot in the door in the world of acting, before he moved out to start a family. And there were still his feelings for Marinette, and there were still many aspects of his mental health that he knew he needed to work on.

Adrien knew he had a lot of growing up to do before he’d be ready to commit to marriage and all that meant. He’d learned his lesson from trying to dive into the deep end right away with Marinette. Adrien wasn’t ready for marriage at that point in his life…but…maybe in five years? A stronger, healthier, wiser, more stable, mature Adrien…that was an Adrien that he could see wanting to marry Luka. Their goals weren’t incompatible. It was just…

Backrubs would not suffice forever. Luka may have been demi, but that did not mean that he didn’t have a sex drive. This would be a problem.

Adrien leaned in and nuzzled Luka’s hair, pressing little kisses along his forehead.

Maybe Adrien could…

He shuddered at the mental image and then took a deep breath, trying to stay calm and collected.

All he had to do was take his clothes off, lie down, and close his eyes. Simple. There would be kissing and caressing and all kinds of things that Adrien liked thrown into the bargain too, so…and Luka was probably really good. Adrien would probably come to enjoy it if he could just get over the knee-jerk churning in his gut at the very thought of it all.

He groaned softly in despair, letting his head drop back to the pillow next to Luka’s.

This wasn’t going to work.

Luka had had actual lovers that he’d enjoyed sexual intimacy with before. There was no way Adrien could satisfy Luka by just tolerating sex. It wouldn’t be good enough. Adrien wouldn’t be good enough to make Luka happy.

Adrien felt ill.

It was like waking up from a nice dream to find oneself back in a living nightmare.

A stray thought pricked Adrien like a sewing needle: Marinette would probably enjoy sleeping with Luka once she got her own issues worked out. They could be a perfectly functional, happy couple once Marinette worked through her problems and fell in love with Luka. Luka was right to wait for her. She could make him happy.

Marinette wasn’t broken like Adrien.

Adrien thought back to the way he had felt the night before when Luka had said, “_You_ **are** the music” and Adrien’s entire body had responded, resonating with those words. He looked at Luka and tried to recapture that moment of arousal…but he didn’t feel anything. He grasped at straws, trying to latch on to something to ignite a spark, something that wasn’t Ladybug or Marinette…but it had almost always been Ladybug and Marinette who made him feel that way in the past. Now…he couldn’t make himself feel anything.

He’d been told before, probably by Rose or Luka, that being biromantic heterosexual was perfectly valid…but he’d looked online, trying to find information, trying to find other people who’d had his problem and found solutions. What he’d discovered instead of the help he’d been seeking was a nasty post about how biromantic heterosexual wasn’t a real orientation and that people who thought they were that were just homophobic. Adrien had stared at the screen for a minute in shocked horror before closing the browser window, deleting his search history, and going to curl up defensively under the covers.

This didn’t feel valid. This felt like the internet was right and that there was something wrong with him keeping him from being able to feel and act like everyone else. It felt like he wasn’t normal, and that was, unfortunately, a familiar feeling, one that Adrien was oh so tired of. Why couldn’t he just be like everybody else this _once_? Especially when it was this important.

And no one could make him feel better about this. Not even Luka. Adrien was letting Luka down, hurting Luka, all because Adrien couldn’t get his act together and be properly bisexual already.

Adrien reached up to swipe at the tears starting to leak from the corners of his eyes.

It was just his luck that at that moment, Luka began to stir.

Adrien took a deep breath and clamped down on all of his swirling emotions, pasting over them with a façade of placidity.

Luka didn’t open his eyes, though, so the effect was wasted.

“…You up?” Adrien softly inquired.

Luka grumbled something, tightening his hold on Adrien, snuggling in closer until Luka’s head rested on Adrien’s shoulder.

“Mm?” Adrien’s hands reflexively wrapped around Luka, fingers coming to tangle in teal locks.

“…back t’ sleep, Angel,” Luka repeated thickly, nuzzling Adrien. “Kids don’t ‘ave t’ be school nother hour.”

Adrien’s heart did a backflip. He wondered how many kids he and Luka had. He wished he could see inside of Luka’s dream. It was probably nice and warm and safe. Everything had worked out in the dream. They were happy. Life was perfect.

“Do you love me?” Adrien whispered, already knowing the answer even though he didn’t understand it.

“More than music, P5,” Luka muttered against Adrien’s skin.

“You shouldn’t,” Adrien mumbled ruefully. “I’m not worth it. I just ruin everything.”

Luka’s eyes slowly opened, and he lifted his head to meet Adrien’s gaze drowsily.

All colour fled from Adrien’s skin, leaving it looking sickly and waxen. “S-Sorry. Did I wake you? I thought you were asleep.”

Luka leaned in and pressed a searing kiss just to the side of Adrien’s mouth. When he pulled back, his sleepy eyes bore into Adrien. “You make me supremely miserable sometimes, but, thanks to you, I also know what paradise feels like. Not just that summer but since then too. No other guy will ever be good enough. Even with all of your perceived flaws, Adrien Émile Agreste, I choose you. Whether you think you’re worth it and regardless of if you pick me too…I love you. Now go back to sleep, Perfect Fifth. I am exhausted.”

Luka’s eyes slid closed, and he lowered his head back to Adrien’s shoulder. Within thirty seconds, he was unconscious once more.

Adrien laid there for a while, trying to make sense of his life. The pieces wouldn’t quite fit together, but… He gazed down at Luka asleep, having beautiful dreams of future happiness. He listened to the soft in and out of Luka’s breathing, felt the rising and falling of Luka’s chest against Adrien’s side. Luka was warm and safe and solid and secure. Despite everything, Luka hadn’t given up hope.

Maybe Adrien shouldn’t give up the fight so easily either.

He pressed a kiss to Luka’s forehead and drifted back off to sleep.

Luka was still out cold when Adrien woke again an hour later, just before nine o’clock.

Adrien carefully slipped out of the bed and padded over to the minifridge, taking out a mixed fruit cup and a palm-sized wheel of Gouda. He quietly crept back to the bed and knelt beside it to slide out the drawer beneath.

Plagg and Nooroo were curled up on their pillow, snuggling. It was so cute that Adrien was partially loath to wake them.

He reached in and gently began to stroke between Plagg’s ears.

The little cat slowly blinked his large eyes until they came into focus on Adrien.

Adrien put a finger to his lips and handed Plagg the Gouda.

“You okay?” Plagg whispered.

Adrien nodded, giving Plagg a smile that he hoped inspired confidence. “I’m glad I came over. I think we needed this.”

Plagg made an uncertain sound before digging into his cheese.

Adrien turned to Nooroo and started to lightly pet the butterfly kwami’s head until he blinked into wakefulness as well.

“Good morning, Adrien-bocchama,” Nooroo greeted quietly with an excited fluttering of his wings.

It always touched Adrien how happy Nooroo was to see him. It also made Adrien feel slightly ill because it prompted him to contemplate what Nooroo’s life had been like with Papillon.

“Is your lover still asleep?” Nooroo inquired conversationally.

Plagg choked on his cheese, hissing, “He’s too young to have a _lover_. Use ‘boyfriend’.”

Adrien smiled sheepishly. “Yes, he’s still sleeping. We were up late, so please try to keep it down, okay? I’ll be in the kitchen if you guys need anything.” He held out the fruit cup for Nooroo.

The little butterfly teared up at the treat, used to only being fed when strictly necessary. “Thank you, Adrien-bocchama.”

Adrien smiled and gave Nooroo an extra scritch on the top of the head. “You’re very welcome, Nooroo. Be sure you both thank Luka for keeping the fridge stocked later, okay? Be good guests.”

Plagg and Nooroo nodded docilely in tandem.

“You make him very happy, Adrien-bocchama,” Nooroo remarked, catching Adrien by surprise.

Adrien blinked at his kwami, trying to process the words. “I…do?”

Nooroo smiled widely. “His aura does a lovely thing when he sees you. Surely you felt it last night?”

“I…uh…wasn’t paying attention,” Adrien chuckled sheepishly. “I was kind of caught up in what _I_ was feeling and wasn’t trying to read his emotions last night. Beside, you know he doesn’t like it when I do that.”

Nooroo pursed his lips thoughtfully. “Yes, but…pay attention sometime. Being able to sense what you mean to him might help with your insecurities. Monsieur Couffaine truly treasures you, Adrien-bocchama. His love for you is such a joy to experience.”

“O-Oh.” Adrien’s mind couldn’t formulate a proper response in the face of this information.

And then Nooroo added, “You should see _your_ aura around _him_ too. So lovely.”

With a vibrantly blush, Adrien whispered an almost incoherent word of parting to his kwamis and stealthily headed for the kitchen.

As he fled, he swiped Luka’s nightshirt off the floor and slipped it on, not wanting to cause a scandal by walking around the houseboat topless.

His head began to clear as he poked around the kitchen, getting out some fresh fruit, washing it, and cutting it up to toss in a bowl to share. He grabbed the loaf of bread from the breadbox and cut off some slices, setting them aside on a plate as he waited for the skillet to warm up.

The plan was to cook the eggs first and put them under a cover to keep them warm while he used the same pan to cook bacon. That way, the eggs wouldn’t taste like bacon, but he’d keep from dirtying more dishes than necessary.

He was staring down at the thin coating of oil in the skillet, waiting for signs of heat when Rose bounded into the kitchen, coming up behind him to catch him in a crushing hug.

“Adrien!” she sang in a lovely, playful arpeggio.

“Rose!” he laughed, turning around in her hold to return the embrace.

She looked up at him, grinning toothily, eyes sparkling with joy. “Every time I see you in this kitchen again, it makes me so happy,” she chuckled.

“Yeah?” Adrien hummed curiously.

“Yeah,” she insisted, pulling back to lean up against the counter by the sink. “You’ve been missed aboard the Liberty. These past few months…having you back…” Her smile positively glittered. “It’s good to have you, Adrien.”

Adrien grimaced, turning back to the pan to crack the eggs and scramble the yolks. “That means a lot to me that _you_ think so, Rose, but I’m pretty sure only half the inhabitants of the Liberty are happy to have me back. The Capitaine goes back and forth between excited and nervous, and Juleka…well, you’d know better than I would, but I’m pretty sure I’m on her black list.”

Rose winced. “It’s not like that.”

“It feels like that,” Adrien muttered, moving the eggs around in the pan to prevent sticking and encourage solidification. “Every time she sees me here, it’s like, ‘Oh. Who brought this piece of garbage into the house?’, and every time I spend the night, the look she gives me… She’s mad at me. She doesn’t want me here, and it makes me really sad because we used to be friends…. I really miss how she used to tease me mercilessly like I was one of the family.”

Rose bit her lip, chewing as she fished for the right words. “At least…Luka and I are happy to have you. And the Capitaine is too. She can see you make Luka happy. She’s just…she likes Marinette too, and she feels kind of weird toward you what with…you know. Knowing about things between you and Luka and not telling Marinette. It’s not you personally. The Capitaine loves you personally. It’s the situation that has her acting funny.”

“Oh,” Adrien replied thickly, fumbling a bit as he transferred the eggs from the pan to a plate and put a cover over them. His face felt like it was burning. “I hadn’t thought of that…. I guess…I mean…I mean, I _am_ the quote, unquote ‘other woman’, but I hadn’t thought the Capitaine would…I don’t know…have a moral objection to me?” Adrien looked back over his shoulder at Rose. “Does she think I’m a slut?”

“What? No!” Rose waved her hands emphatically. “No, no. No. It’s not like _that_. She doesn’t care about that _in general_. It’s just because it’s Marinette _specifically _being cheated on, and she likes Marinette. The Capitaine is all about free love. I mean…” Rose rolled her eyes. “Look at Juleka and Luka. They clearly have different fathers, and their fathers probably aren’t even the man the Capitaine was living with who they refer to as their ‘father’. The Capitaine isn’t bothered that you’re Luka’s lover. She’s just concerned about Marinette.”

Adrien nodded slowly as he turned his attention back to breakfast, opening the package of bacon and scrunching up his nose as he took out a slice and laid it in the pan.

Rose frowned. “You don’t eat bacon. Why are you making bacon?”

Adrien shrugged. “The man I’m in love with eats bacon, and I’m a good lover sometimes.”

Rose gave a little squeal of delight, jumping and clapping her hands. “Oh my gosh! You admit it! You admit that you’re in love with him! Oh my gosh! I knew it! I knew it, I knew it, I knew it!” she sang.

Adrien rolled his eyes and laid another strip of bacon in the pan. “Yep. Congratulations. You saw that coming.”

She lowered her voice and whispered excitedly, “What happened last night?”

Adrien continued adding slices of bacon to the pan and occasionally moving them around with a fork so that they’d cook properly. “Nothing, really.”

She gave a patented coo and bounced in place. “Did you guys have sex?”

Adrien’s posture slumped in defeat. “Rose…he has a girlfriend. He really loves her, and he wouldn’t cheat on her like that. Last night was just…snuggling and nuzzling and backrubs and talking. It was…sensual, but not sexual.”

Rose made a thoughtful noise, taking stock of the weight evident in Adrien’s words. “You sound kind of down. You wanted more?”

Adrien shook his head. “I…don’t think I can.”

She frowned in confusion. “Hm?”

Adrien’s shoulders slowly rose to meet his ears. “I think that I’m…broken. I don’t think that I’m able to want more. I tried. I tried really hard, but…I don’t know. Just… Penises are gross.”

Rose’s eyes went wide, and her mouth formed a little circle as she gasped, “Oooooh. Oh. _Oh_. You still don’t… You’re not… You don’t _want _sex.”

Adrien hung his head, mumbling, “I _want_ to want sex. I want…whatever he wants. Whatever will make him pick me. …I want someone to pick me, but there’s always something wrong with me that makes me not worth picking.”

“Oh, Adrien, that’s not true!” Rose insisted, putting a supportive hand on his arm and squeezing lightly.

“It was that way with Marinette,” Adrien retorted bitterly. “…and Luka’s the same.” He poked savagely at the pieces of bacon.

One let out a vicious pop, causing Adrien to jump back, startled.

“Did it get you?” Rose grabbed his left hand, taking the fork and setting it aside so that she could check the hand for burns.

“Is he okay?” Juleka called, rushing from her hiding spot, through the living room, and into the kitchen to offer assistance. “Run his hand under cold water. I’ll get the first aid kit.”

“Sorry. I’m fine. Just startled,” Adrien explained through embarrassment, pulling his hand back and picking up the fork to fish the cooked pieces of bacon out of the pan and onto a plate. “Sorry. I’ll be out of your way in just a sec, Juleka.”

Juleka frowned at the back of Adrien’s head as he avoided her gaze, trying to make himself look smaller and unobtrusive. “You’re not in my way. I just came in to check on Rose. Take your time.”

“Sorry,” Adrien repeated, feeling very exposed, barefoot in his pajama bottoms and Luka’s shirt. “Thank you.”

Juleka chewed on her lip as she watched Adrien finish with the bacon and start to clean up.

Rose lightly rested her fingers on Adrien’s forearm. “I’ll use the pan for my own bacon, so don’t worry about the dishes. Go bring your man breakfast in bed. He’ll like that.”

“Thanks, Rose.” He smiled in thanks, turning to consolidate the food he’d prepared onto two plates.

Juleka frowned as she watched him, soured guilt rolling around in her stomach. She took a deep breath and bit the bullet. “Hey. Adrien.”

He froze and reluctantly looked up at her. “Y-Yeah?”

She ran a hand through her hair, sighing in frustration. “Look. I don’t hate you, okay?”

Confusion settled onto Adrien’s face first, but that was quickly replaced by a blur of surprise, horror, and shame like racecars flying by as realization set in.

“How long were you standing there?” he muttered down at the slices of bread.

Juleka looked down at her slipper-clad feet. “Nearly the beginning. I heard you and Rose from the hallway, her saying how happy she was you were back, and I was going to join you guys and say something nasty and passive aggressive, but…then it got awkward, and I couldn’t not listen. Now, I’m glad that I didn’t say anything because that would have been really mean…. I don’t hate you, Adrien. I’m still a little mad about how you just dumped Luka last time, but it’s not like I hate you or anything. I’m scared of you.”

Adrien looked up and stared at her, perplexed. “Scared? Of _me_?”

She nodded, hesitantly meeting his eyes as she leaned back against the counter and crossed her arms. “Yeah. You terrify me, Agreste.”

“Why?”

Rose tactfully set about preparing breakfast for the rest of the family, pretending that she was giving them space to talk and not listening in.

Juleka shook her head. “My whole life, I’ve been the weak one, you know? And my brother’s indestructible. No matter what, nothing can break him…except the people he gives his heart to…. Has he ever told you about Honoré?”

Adrien gulped and nodded.

“Honoré put him out of commission for a whole month. Total shutdown, and even after that first month, he wasn’t one hundred percent the same for a while still. I was scared. I thought the world was ending,” Juleka confessed. “But then he got over it, and a couple months later he was dating other people, and it was okay again.”

“Until me?” Adrien guessed.

Juleka held up a finger and shook it, voice trembling as she accused, “You _leveled _him. You took my amazing, invulnerable brother, and you obliterated him, Adrien Agreste. Not just for a month or two, but for a whole nightmarish year. Okay, the first seven or eight months were the worst of it, but it was a full year before Luka started acting like Luka again. And now you’re back and you could do that to him all over again if the whim struck you? Yeah. You f-ing terrify me, Adrien, so sorry if I haven’t welcomed you back with open arms.”

“I…can see why you wouldn’t,” Adrien mumbled, cheeks burning with shame.

“Yeah, but…maybe I’ve been a little insensitive,” Juleka sighed, dropping her arm back down to her side with a shrug. “Clearly, you’re going through some stuff, and it sounds like you really do care about him and don’t want to hurt him again. It sounds like you’re not walking away without a fight this time, so…maybe I can ease up a little. I still don’t trust you with my brother’s heart, Agreste, but…I miss being friends with you too.”

“Awwww!” Rose cooed, spinning around to clasp her hands together in glee. “Group hug time!”

“Rose,” Juleka groaned.

“No. You two finally made up, and I’m happy,” Rose pouted. “Couffaine family group hug. Right now.”

Adrien shrugged, putting covers over the plates to keep the food warm, and then turned to the girls with open arms.

“Ugh,” Juleka made a show of complaining for the sake of her image, but she too opened her arms and stepped into the group hug.

“I feel left out,” Luka whined from the hallway, crossing his arms in front of his bare chest.

The three teenagers broke apart and shone three shades of smile on him.

“Group hug is over. Come hug your fiancé,” Rose urged. “I’m sure Adrien will give you all the attention you want.”

“She’s not wrong,” Adrien chuckled, coming out from behind the counter to meet Luka halfway by the couch.

Luka’s arms snaked around Adrien’s neck as Adrien’s own encircled Luka’s waist.

“Hey, Orpheus,” Adrien whispered breathily, resting his forehead against Luka’s.

“Hey, Adrien,” Luka responded in the same dazed, longing way.

Not Perfect Fifth or Angel, but not yet back to Ariel either. A neutral name with the level of emotion and feeling determined by tone. Luka’s tone was pure love.

Luka gave Adrien’s nose a fond nuzzle and then pulled back slightly, arms still in a loose tangle about Adrien’s shoulders. “Rose called you my fiancé; when did that happen? I didn’t accidentally propose out loud last night, did I?”

Adrien giggled, giving Luka’s hip an affectionate squeeze. “No, I think the closest we got to engaged was when you told me to only ask you out if I could see marriage as an option…but your concern about accidentally saying something _out loud_ leads me to think that the thought of a proposal was in your head.” Adrien gently tugged Luka’s hips closer.

Luka stepped in without resistance or complaint. “When I’m around you, the thought is usually in my head.”

“Awww!” Rose squealed. “Juleka, look at them. They’re precious!”

Rose’s voice seemed to snap Luka out of it.

He stepped back, breaking away to run one hand through his hair while the other covered his mouth. He let out a hissed curse. “I am a horrible boyfriend.”

“Lulu,” Rose cooed. “No.”

“Luc, you’re not,” Juleka sighed.

Luka shook his head. “I am. I’m a cheater and a liar and…God, I suck.”

“Luka,” Adrien called, coming around in front of him and carefully resting a hand on Luka’s shoulder. “Stop. Give yourself a break, okay?”

Luka frowned, visibly unsure.

“Listen to him,” Juleka suggested. “It’s not like your girlfriend is perfect either. Forgive yourself like you’re always forgiving her, and just enjoy being loved on a little, will ya? You’ve been miserable for months. Let yourself have this.”

Luka turned his confusion on Juleka. “You think?”

She nodded.

Luka snorted. “You, the person who’s been like, ‘don’t cheat on Marinette or I’m gonna tell on you’ for the past four months?”

Juleka shrugged. “That was at first because she’s my friend and I thought you two were going to be happy together once she worked through some stuff, but…she has literally been torturing you, so my loyalties are sort of shifting…. My main concern is your happiness, Luc. Okay? So if taking a blonde supermodel back to your bed and making out with him for the rest of the day makes you happy, I’m not gonna say anything.” Juleka put her hands up in surrender and then turned to wrap her arms around Rose from behind.

“Good speech,” Rose giggled, tipping her head to kiss Juleka’s jaw. “I’m proud of you.”

Juleka gave a happy little mumble as she nuzzled Rose’s hair.

Adrien looked to Luka, waiting for a sign either to back away or come closer.

Luka studied Adrien’s face, chewing at his bottom lip as he struggled with his thoughts.

Adrien smiled reassuringly. “Whatever you decide is fine. I came here for _you_. I wanted to make you feel better. If I’m not doing that…”

Luka closed the distance between them, reaching out to ghost a caress against the back of Adrien’s hand. “You are. You do,” he assured. “I…give up.” He took Adrien’s hand in his. “For today. No kissing, but…”

“Just flirting?” Adrien completed with an ironic chuckle.

Luka nodded, squeezing Adrien’s hand.

Adrien squeezed back. “Okay. We should get back to bed. I made you breakfast, intending to bring it to you in bed, and it’s probably getting cold by now.” He tugged Luka towards the kitchen to retrieve the plates.

“You made me breakfast?” Luka blinked rapidly in a daze.

Adrien shrugged. “I thought it would be romantic. You know. Standard ‘morning after’ procedure.”

Luka laughed, shaking his head. “It _is_ romantic. No one’s made me breakfast the morning after I’ve actually had sex with them before.”

Adrien hummed happily in triumph. “Well, it sounds like I’m beating out the rest of your lovers already.”

“Yes, you definitely are.” Luka couldn’t hold back the giant grin on his face. “Except…none of my previous lovers ever stole my clothes.” He tugged on the shirt Adrien had swiped.

Adrien gave a snort as he handed Luka one of the plates. “This is standard morning after protocol. In every manga I’ve ever read, the morning after the girlfriend always puts on her boyfriend’s shirt. It’s totally a thing. It’s sexy. Like, you’re supposed to look at me wearing your shirt and get all turned on thinking, ‘Yeah, that’s mine’.”

“…I could get behind that,” Luka decided, definitely seeing the appeal. “Please feel free to continue stealing my clothes.”

“I will,” Adrien assured but then paused mid-step. “Not that I’m the girl in this relationship. Because I’m not, so I don’t want you to treat me like the girl.” Adrien frowned when he noticed that Rose, Juleka, and Luka were all looking at him with mixed expressions of amused pity.

“What?” He studied each of his friends’ faces in turn. “Isn’t that how this works? One of us has to be ‘the girl’?”

“Luka, educate your boyfriend properly,” Juleka sighed, resting her chin on Rose’s head.

“Be nice,” Rose chided, tugging playfully on Juleka’s hair. “He doesn’t know any better.”

“It’s not his fault he’s been raised in a heteronormative society,” Luka added, leaning in and giving Adrien’s forehead a kiss. “P5, that’s all TV stereotyping made up by straight people. Okay, yeah. In some relationships, there’s ‘the girl’ and ‘the guy’ where the couple operates according to traditional, stereotypic gender roles, but in most real-life relationships, people are just people. It’s like that in het relationships too nowadays. You’re you, and I’m me, and if it ever comes to it, we’ll sit down and talk about who makes dinner and who does the laundry and whose turn it is to go feed the baby or take out the trash. Relationships are organic partnerships, not scripted roles that you act out.”

“O-Oh,” Adrien replied distractedly, mind wondering back to the question of how many kids Luka and Adrien had in this lovely little future fantasy Luka had constructed for them. Adrien wanted to know their names and what they looked like. Adrien wanted to know what kind of house they had and whether they had any pets. Adrien wanted to know so that he could daydream about them too.

“Come on.” Luka grinned, pulling Adrien gently back towards the bedroom. “I’m tired of sharing you with Juleka and Rose. Let’s go have a romantic breakfast in bed, and then I want to play you this new song I just thought up inspired by you wearing my clothes.”

Adrien burst out laughing and happily followed where led.

Rose beamed as she watched them go. “They’re going to get married and make beautiful babies together.”

Juleka snickered, giving the side of Rose’s neck a kiss. “How can you say that with such certainty in the face of what a mess they are?”

“I can just tell,” Rose sighed, going back to the stove. “They’re hopelessly in love. They’ll work it out.”

“I hope you’re right,” Juleka muttered, going to the fridge to get out milk and more eggs. “I’m just dreading the day that this blows up in Luka’s face.”

Rose placed a hand on her girlfriend’s arm and smiled up at Juleka serenely. “It’s not going to. Adrien would move heaven and earth to make Luka happy. It might not be pretty for a while while they get things sorted out, but it’s not going to be like last time, Juju.”

Juleka rested her hand on top of Rose’s, interlacing their fingers. “God, I hope you’re right.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you haven't seen it already, Mireille has done some adorable art for Chapter Twelve: Lost Woods. You can find it on Tumblr here: https://mireilletan.tumblr.com/post/188781918180/hello-have-you-gotten-any-asks-for-the-drawing (Thanks, Mireille! ^o^)
> 
> Chapter title song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RuUFJE2uebw
> 
> So, is Adrien's continued sexuality crisis getting boring yet? What did we think of the chapter? Was there enough of a balance between the angst and the fluff?
> 
> What other kinds of scenes are you guys interested in seeing? Any requests? I know a couple people have expressed interest in Marinette. I need to do a Lukadrienette chapter, don't I? What I need to do is double down on getting Daisy written so that I can get to the Lukadrienette scenes I want to write in Jabberwocky. ^.^;
> 
> Thanks for reading guys! I'll see you again probably later this week. I have a trilogy of short, authentic drabbles for you next. Take care!


	15. Progress

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally they're getting somewhere.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello guys! Happy Thursday. ^.^ Thank you for joining me once again, and thank you so much to everyone who left comments and kudos or bookmarked the story last time. You guys are really the sweetest, and I appreciate each one of you immensely.
> 
> This chapter is a little different. It takes place in the middle of May after Marinette and Luka break up. Adrien has just turned nineteen, and Luka is twenty-one and a half. This actually takes place during an additional, fifth story in the series that hasn't been written/published yet called The Seduction of Adrien Agreste. It's the story dealing with how Luka and Adrien gradually "train" Adrien to be comfortable having some version of sex with Luka. There will be some descriptions of sexual situations and acts, but I'm planning on the focus to be on the relationship and the character development and them as a couple more than the physical stuff. If that sounds like something you'd be interested in, please stay tuned. I plan on writing it near the end of Daisy and Jabberwocky. I believe you can subscribe to get updates on a series? I'll be posting it as part of the Springtime in Wonderland Series.
> 
> THIS chapter, though, does NOT contain descriptions of sexual acts. It is, however, implied that Luka has just given Adrien a blow job. Relationship negotiation and fluff ensues. Enjoy!

“Thoughts?” Luka chuckled as he crawled up to the top of the bed next to Adrien and pulled the sheet around them to keep Adrien warm.

Adrien gave another mewl of satisfaction and rolled over to wrap his arms around Luka. “‘Wow’,” he purred. “…That’s it. That’s all my brain can come up with at the moment. Ask again later once my neural chemistry has returned to its normal state because it’s like Bastille Day with all the fireworks going off in there right now.”

“That’s all right,” Luka assured contently. “I don’t need the praise. Just want to make sure you’re enjoying this.”

Adrien stifled a laugh, and it came out as a snort. “Seriously? Was the moaning and the gasping and the pulling on your hair not indication enough?” Upon slightly further consideration, Adrien winced. “Sorry about that, by the way. Next time I’ll try to remember to grip the sheets. I didn’t hurt you, did I?” He studied Luka’s eyes intently.

“Not at all.” Luka shook his head, grinning. “I like the hair pulling.”

A sheepish smile unfolded on Adrien’s lips as one hand found its way up to Luka’s head and began rubbing soothing patterns against his scalp, occasionally giving Luka’s hair a little tug.

Luka groaned happily, letting his eyes slip closed.

“I love you, Orpheus,” Adrien reminded.

“I know,” Luka chuckled. “I love you too, Perfect Fifth.”

Adrien leaned in to instigate a languid series of kisses.

Luka’s eyes fluttered open at the brush of Adrien’s lips against his own, and he pulled back to ask, “Are you sure you want to be kissing me right now? I mean…you know where my mouth’s been.”

“Yes,” Adrien chuckled impishly. “I remember, thanks…and, now, as an encore, I’m going to stick my _tongue_ down your throat…if that’s all right?” He waited for consent despite already guessing Luka’s answer.

Luka’s smile grew into a full-on smirk. “Yes, _please_.”

Adrien surged forward, and Luka let him take charge, happily submitting as Adrien set the pace. Fast and frantic at first and then gradually tapering off into an unhurried slow dance of tongues and lips with little bursts of energy and insistence thrown in at asymmetric intervals.

Eventually, Adrien pulled back to look down at Luka, analyzing his face. “You all right, My Love?”

“Stellar,” Luka sighed, letting himself go limp back against the pillows.

Adrien bit his lip. “You’re sure? That looks uncomfortable.” Adrien nodded to the situation in Luka’s boxers.

Luka shrugged. “Don’t worry about it.”

Adrien rested his head on Luka’s shoulder and gently began to nuzzle his way up Luka’s neck. “I do worry. We’ve been at this for over a month, and you’re always bending over backwards to even get my body to respond in the first place, and then you just take care of _me_. I mean, I know you _like_ this, and I know you said we’d take this in baby steps until my body wanted to have sex with you and I was mentally comfortable with the idea, but…this is taking a long time, and this doesn’t seem fair to you,” he whispered miserably.

“This is fine,” Luka stressed.

“No, it’s not,” Adrien muttered ruefully. “Can’t we…? I mean…I guess I could…?” Adrien bit his lip with a little growl of frustration. “I want _you_ to feel good too.”

Luka tipped his head to press a kiss to Adrien’s hair. “Patience, Angel. I appreciate your concern, but I can hang in there a little longer. I know it feels like a long time, but you’re actually doing really well. I mean, six weeks ago you were all, ‘Ew, gross. No, don’t touch me’, and now you’re naked in my bed. Adrien, I am ecstatic with our progress. I’m not going to lie and say that this isn’t hard for me, but actually feeling like we’re getting to the point where I want us to be is…after everything I’ve been through this past year…I can deal with this.”

Adrien gave a dissatisfied grumble but didn’t protest. “Shall I go take a shower and get ready for bed so that you can _deal_ with this in private?”

Luka nodded, nipping gently at Adrien’s ear. “Then we can snuggle and watch a few more episodes of [Madoka Magica](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Puella_Magi_Madoka_Magica). Okay?”

Adrien bit his lip. “If we watch episode six, we have to watch the rest of it. Fair warning.”

Luka pulled back to cock an eyebrow.

“Seriously,” Adrien confirmed. “I know from watching it myself and then showing it to Nino, Marinette, Chloé, and my dad. Episode six is the ‘holy crap! what the hell?!’ episode. You have to watch the rest or you won’t be able to sleep.”

Luka shrugged. “All right. I’ve never been opposed to the idea of you keeping me up all night in bed.”

Adrien rolled his eyes and leaned in for another smooch before sliding out of bed and making his way to the bathroom to shower.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First off, if you haven't seen it yet, Buggy did a marvelous drawing of Swallowtail. Check it out on Tumblr here: https://pawsomelybuggy.tumblr.com/post/188825262264/messy-scribbles-of-swallowtail-from (Thank you, Buggy!!!)
> 
> Secondly...oh, Sinister Six. I watched Madoka Magica when I was studying abroad in Japan. My brother warned me about episode six, but I didn't take him seriously. I started watching at ten at night, and I should have gone to bed after I watched five, but I was curious, so... Yeah. I was up until the small hours of the morning watching the whole thing. ^.^; Whoops. Worth it!
> 
> So what did we think of the chapter? Did we enjoy it? Not care for it? Thoughts?
> 
> Confession: So you know in Chapter Fourteen: Song of Storms when Adrien tells Luka that if he ever leaves Adrien in bed to go play music, Adrien is going to dump him? I was originally trying to write that type of scene. XD But they just kept talking, and then the talking got serious, and Luka really couldn't be persuaded to leave Adrien's arms much less so the bed. So that didn't go as planned, but I ended up with this scene instead, and I thought it was kind of cute, so I decided to keep this and try to write the scene I wanted again for next chapter. ^.^;
> 
> Thanks for reading guys! I'll see you again soon, probably on Sunday. Take care!


	16. "Real"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Luka and Adrien really need to work on their "defining the relationship conversation" skills.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Greetings everyone! I hope this update finds you doing well. I'm not bad, just sluggish. I got a lot of writing done yesterday that I'm happy with (, though, I'm afraid my Russian literature nerd is showing. ^.^; You'll see. Chapter Nineteen). Thank you to everyone who commented last time. Thank you as well to everyone who left kudos or bookmarked the work or even just read it. I'm so glad that we can share this work together.
> 
> Today's chapter is another Seduction of Adrien Agreste chapter. It takes place in late May when Adrien is nineteen and Luka is twenty-one and a half. Again, while this chapter does NOT contain descriptions of sexual acts, it is implied that Luka has just given Adrien a blow job because this is my "take two" of trying to write the scene I wanted where Luka leaves Adrien in bed to go compose a song.

Adrien sank bonelessly into the mattress, purring his head off.

“Good?” Luka chuckled, crawling up beside his beloved and tucking the cover around them to keep Adrien from getting cold.

Adrien giggled, sounding tipsy despite the fact that he hadn’t been drinking. Luka chalked it up to the hormones flooding his system.

“Freaking wonderful,” Adrien confirmed, snaking his arms around Luka’s neck. He giggled harder. “Orpheus, you’ve got a little something…” He leaned in and sloppily licked the corner of Luka’s mouth.

This led to an open-mouthed kiss that broke apart several minutes later with a wet smack.

“God, I love you,” Luka hissed, pulling Adrien to him in a crushing hold, breathing hard.

“Luka,” Adrien called softly, feeling horribly guilty at the state Luka was in. “You know, I think…maybe we should try doing something about this.” Slowly, his hand slid down to rest on Luka’s hip and finger the band of Luka’s boxers.

Luka pulled away, sitting up. “Not tonight, P5.” He pasted on an easy grin over his anxiety. “Thank you, but…I don’t know that we’re ready.”

_Luka_ wasn’t ready for things to go wrong. He wasn’t ready for Adrien to be uncomfortable and grossed out at the next step. He wasn’t ready to lose what he’d worked so hard to gain by being too greedy for more.

Adrien sighed, defeated. “Maybe next time? I think I’m ready to try. I mean…you said we’d go back to being fully dressed, and it’d kind of be just…like rubbing against each other’s legs, right? I think I can handle that.”

“Maybe next time,” Luka repeated, clinging desperately to his factitious smile.

Adrien frowned, hormone levels stabilizing and head clearing, granting him the ability to focus long enough to discern something was wrong. “Orpheus…what is it?”

Luka shook his head and leaned in for a quick kiss. “It’s nothing, P5.” He made to get up, but Adrien’s hand flew out, grasping his wrist.

“Luka Couffaine, talk to me,” Adrien sighed, miffed at being shut out.

Luka gazed at Adrien thoughtfully for a moment, staring into his jewel-like green eyes, normally a light, verdant peridot but now a darker, rich emerald. “_I’m_ not ready.”

“_You_ are not ready?” Adrien repeated incredulously. “You?”

Luka nodded, a shy smile peeking out from behind his nerves. “You are everything I’ve ever wanted, Adrien Agreste, and I’m terrified of screwing this up.”

“Oh, Pretty _Boy_,” Adrien sang, cupping Luka’s face in both hands and stroking Luka’s cheeks with his thumbs. “All I want is to make you happy. If this isn’t what you want, then we’ll wait, but if you’re just holding back on something you want because you’re scared about how I’m going to react…Mon Amour, don’t do this to yourself. Talk to me. Let’s figure this out together. Okay?”

Luka took a deep breath and nodded. “Okay. All right. Next time.”

“Yeah?” Adrien chuckled giddily.

“Yeah,” Luka confirmed, hesitantly noting, “You sound excited.”

Adrien bit his lip and shrugged, hands sliding down Luka’s arms to take Luka’s hands in his own. “Kind of? Part of me is still freaking out and unsure about this, but…more of me just wants to hurry up and get through this part so that we can be a real couple already. That’s what I really want…to be able to be whatever you want me to be…just like how you are for me.”

“Oh, Angel,” Luka sighed, leaning in to nuzzle Adrien’s hair. “We’re _already_ a real couple. Sex isn’t a prerequisite to making our relationship quote, unquote ‘real’.”

Adrien blinked rapidly. “But I thought… You said you couldn’t agree to go out with me unless I could… You said we couldn’t date because you wouldn’t be happy in a relationship with someone you couldn’t physically express your love with. You said that making love with someone was a necessary emotional bonding experience, so you couldn’t promise anything long-term with me. I thought we were friends with benefits and that this whole ordeal was kind of like…I don’t know…me auditioning to be your serious boyfriend, proving that I was good enough to make a future with you.” Suddenly all the questions came tumbling out in one breath, “How long have we been in a _real_ relationship? Are we _dating_? Am I your boyfriend?”

Luka opened his mouth, closed it, opened it again, and cursed. “P5, I am _so _sorry. This whole time you thought…” He tugged one of his hands away from Adrien to cover his face while the remaining hand squeezed Adrien’s.

“_Are_ we dating?” Adrien demanded a touch hysterically. “That’s the part I’m most concerned about. I’m kind of hoping you say no because I’m going to feel really stupid if I’ve dated you twice now without realizing it either time,” Adrien huffed. “I’m starting to think my dad was right and you can’t be dating someone unless you talk about it and mutually agree.”

Luka lowered the hand from his face and reached out to stroke Adrien’s. “You…have _always_ been good enough. I’ve always wanted you. This, what we’re doing, wasn’t so that you could prove anything. This was us seeing if we could take care of both of our essential relationship needs and make this work long-term, and I think the answer is yes. Adrien, I’m _already_ serious about you.”

Adrien stuck out his bottom lip in a frazzled pout. “So we _are_ dating?”

Luka nodded, giving Adrien’s hand a squeeze. “_I_ thought so.”

Adrien squeezed back despite the sour look on his face. “I can’t believe this. So when did we start dating again?”

Luka’s smile turned pained. “When you agreed to work with me on trying to take steps towards having some version of sex?”

“So we’ve been dating for a month and a half?” Adrien sighed. “Do you remember what day that was?”

Luka bit his lip and shook his head. “I mean, we could try to work it out if it’s that important.”

Adrien smacked Luka’s arm. “Of course it’s important! It’s our anniversary!”

Luka’s eyes widened. “Oh. Right. Sorry. Of course it’s important.”

Adrien grabbed for his phone, pulling up his calendar. “I don’t even remember what day of the week that was.”

“Wasn’t it a Thursday?” Luka volunteered. “We’d just gotten coffee or lunch or something with Nino.”

Adrien sighed heavily.

“You know,” Luka tentatively proposed, “We could pick a different day. Maybe the day I took you on that date before we came back here and made love for the first time?”

Adrien chuckled softly, his cheeks going rose. “I’m still not sure if what we’ve done so far really constitutes ‘making love’. The internet seems to suggest that we’ve gotten to third base.”

Luka rolled his eyes but smiled fondly. “‘The day we got to third base’ doesn’t sound as romantic. Just pick a day, Angel. Whatever day you pick will be fine.”

Adrien pursed his lips, setting his phone back down on the nightstand. “I don’t just want to pick a day. I want it to be our actual anniversary.”

“How about today, then?” Luka suggested. “Today’s the day we’re sitting down and deciding that we’re dating, so why can’t today be our actual anniversary?”

Adrien’s nose scrunched up. “But…today’s not a good day. Today sucks. I mean, it’s not like it’s a special day. We didn’t go on a date or anything.” He dropped his gaze to the bedsheets and mumbled, “I kind of had it all planned out, how I was going to ask you, but now I find out that we’re already dating, and… Sorry.” He shook his head, leaning in to rest it against Luka’s shoulder.

“Oh, Adrien,” Luka sighed, affectionately nuzzling Adrien’s hair. “Okay. What day do you want?”

Adrien blinked, lifting his head to stare at Luka in puzzlement. “What do you mean?”

“Think about what day you want to be our anniversary,” Luka explained. “Then ask me out, and that will be our anniversary.”

An adoring smile slowly broke out on Adrien’s lips, making his eyes glimmer like green embers dancing. “You’re too good to me, Orpheus. I don’t know why you put up with my outrageous behavior.”

Luka shook his head. “I have enough sense to recognize when I have something worth holding onto.”

Adrien’s eyes widened, pupils nearly taking over the irises. “You really shouldn’t say things like that to me.”

Luka chuckled, a self-satisfied smirk stretching across his lips. “Oh? Yeah?”

“Yeah,” Adrien snorted. “It _does_ stuff to me, makes my heart act all funny.”

“I think I can fix it,” Luka chuckled, leaning in for a kiss and gently pushing Adrien back down onto the bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you haven't seen it yet, Mireille did a lovely drawing of Swallowtail too! I'm super excited. You can find it on Tumblr here: https://mireilletan.tumblr.com/post/188916437750/swallowtail-aka-adrien-agreste-with-the
> 
> So, as you can see, I have once again failed to write the scene I had intended because my characters escaped from me and went off to do their own thing. As soon as Adrien started talking about their relationship being "real", I knew I was doomed. Oh well.
> 
> Thoughts? Feelings? Revelations? Part of me thinks this chapter is funny (poor Adrien). Part of me thinks this chapter is cute (Luka is such a sweetie. I love him). Part of me thinks this chapter is ridiculous. I look forward to your thoughts.
> 
> Next chapter will be my third and final attempt to produce the scene I'd wanted originally, and then we'll go back to our regularly scheduled programming (only not because Chapter Eighteen is Lukanette...with a side of Lukadrien and some Lukadrienette vibes because even though Adrien isn't physically present in the scene, he has a phone, and he knows how to use it, and he's a big part of Luka and Marinette's relationship anyway, even when he's not there. Look forward to that or blame Mireille because she's the one who requested it ^.^;).
> 
> See you Wednesday, 11/13/2019!


	17. Inopportune Amusement

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Needs are discussed; compromises are made.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! Happy Wednesday. Next week can't come soon enough. -.-; Two of my teammates were out Monday and Tuesday, so I was Mikau, T, and D for those two days. And we'll still be a person down for the rest of the week, so I'm going to be Mikau and D until the real D gets back on Monday. It's kind of stressful. But you came here to read the story. Thank you, as always, to everyone who comments, leaves kudos, and bookmarks the story. You guys make me smile.
> 
> So this is take three of trying to write a scene where Luka leaves Adrien in bed to go write a song, so it's another Seduction of Adrien Agreste chapter. It takes place in late May/early June when Adrien is nineteen and Luka is twenty-one and a half. For the third time, while this chapter does NOT contain descriptions of sexual acts, it is implied that Luka has just given Adrien a blow job.
> 
> Okay? Okay. Here we go!

Adrien purred happily as a lovely cocktail of hormones washed through his system, overwhelming his senses. After two months of “experimentation”, as Luka called it, Adrien was subconsciously starting to associate this blissful feeling with Luka so that, now, whenever Luka came to mind, the fleeting thought of sex wasn’t far behind it.

Adrien realized that this had been Luka’s goal all along, and while part of him kind of resented being conditioned like Pavlov’s dog, the other part had to congratulate Luka because his plan was working.

Adrien still wasn’t so sure about penetration or even taking Luka’s boxers off, but…they were a far cry from where they had started with Adrien completely uninterested in any kind of sexual contact two months before.

“How’s my Angel?” Luka inquired gently as he covered Adrien up and crawled to the head of the bed beside Adrien, into snuggling range.

Adrien wanted nothing more than to curl up and cuddle with the guy he loved, exchanging sweet nothings and kisses as Adrien rode out the flurry of chemicals coursing through his veins, making the world soft and fuzzy.

“I don’t deserve you,” Adrien sighed contentedly, wrapping his arms around Luka’s neck and tipping his face up for a kiss.

The contact was light and lingering which was perfect to start with, but at the point where Adrien expected Luka to deepen the kiss, Luka drew back instead.

Adrien blinked up dazedly into adoring cyan eyes.

Luka grinned, placing a quick kiss to Adrien’s forehead before pulling away and getting up out of bed.

Adrien frowned as the afterglow quickly faded away. He suddenly felt cold and began to wonder what exactly he’d done wrong.

“Um…what are you doing?” He tried to keep his voice level so that Luka wouldn’t hear the anxiety behind the words.

“Song idea,” Luka explained laconically, completely distracted as he fished through his pile of instruments for one that could capture the essence of the melody in his head.

“You should come back to bed,” Adrien suggested, rolling over onto his side and propping himself up on an elbow, hoping he somehow managed to look alluring. If this had been a photoshoot, he wouldn’t have been worried about nailing the pose, but in real life when it was important, Adrien couldn’t help but be a bit on edge. “I’ll be your instrument. Play me now, them later,” Adrien beckoned, voice warm and inviting.

Luka laughed in a way that suggested that he thought Adrien was joking. “Just a sec, Angel.” He reached for his violin case but then second-guessed himself and made for the clarinet.

Adrien glared at Luka’s back, feeling hurt and foolish. “See if I ever try to be seductive again,” Adrien muttered, pulling the covers more tightly around himself.

Luka didn’t seem to hear as he set down the clarinet and headed for his trusty old acoustic guitar.

Adrien rolled over to his other side so that his back was to Luka and grabbed a pillow to wrap himself around in the absence of a snuggling partner. The buzz from the orgasm was completely gone, and Adrien really just wanted his clothes back.

Luka took a seat at the foot of the bed and started humming happily as he tuned his instrument.

“Pay attention to me,” Adrien whined, feeling degraded by the fact that he even had to ask.

Luka chuckled as he reached down and gave Adrien’s foot a squeeze. “You are the only thing extant in the universe, My Love. You have my undivided attention.” He took his hand back from Adrien’s foot to strum gently on the guitar.

Adrien was suddenly seized with an intense bout of jealousy directed toward the instrument. He _hated_ that guitar. He wanted that guitar to burn in hell for daring to seduce the man Adrien loved away from him.

Adrien sat up, letting the pillow he’d been snuggling fall to the bed beside him. He inched down to the foot of the bed and reached out to snap the band of Luka’s boxers. “Hey,” he called softly in one last-ditch attempt. “Show me where F is.”

Luka blinked as the sensual, Adrien-inspired melody in his head ground to a halt. He turned and actually looked at Adrien: the sad, insecure expression on his face, the slump of his shoulders, the total lack of confidence in the way he averted his eyes.

Adrien eventually looked up when Luka didn’t respond in a timely fashion. “Please?” he added.

Luka tossed the guitar aside, one hand going to Adrien’s cheek while the other found his hip, thumbs beginning to stroke reassuringly. “My Perfect Fifth, what’s wrong?” He gave Adrien’s forehead a reassuring little bump with his own. “What is it?”

“It seems like you’re bored with me,” Adrien mumbled. “Is it because you’re not getting to come too? Because we’ve talked about this. I’m ready to try to go further as soon as you are, so if that’s the problem—or is it something else? Am I doing something wrong?” Adrien searched Luka’s eyes for answers.

“No,” Luka insisted, mind whirling, trying to make sense of the scene in which he found himself. “Absolutely not. You’re not doing _anything_ wrong. You are _perfect_. Why in the world would you think I was bored?”

Adrien shrugged, leaning into Luka’s hand on his cheek. “I mean…you’ve seen me naked less than ten times, but, like, the minute you’re done with me, you go off to your instruments, and it’s like I don’t matter anymore…so I thought…you were bored with me.”

Luka shook his head emphatically. “No, no, no. Never, P5. God, I am so gone on you, it’s not even funny. I just…you a_mused_ me, and I got this little theme in my head that needs to be worked out into a full-length piece. I swear to you, my head is one hundred percent filled with you.”

The corner of Adrien’s mouth twitched into a frown, and his eyebrows gradually inched together. “But…you’re focused on the music, not me.”

Luka shook his head again. “Music that _is_ you. Music that is how you make me feel, all the new and exciting ways you make me fall in love with you. Music that expresses my love for you. It’s all about you, Adrien. This, this flurry of inspiration, is a part of loving you. This is me continuing to express love to you. It’s like what we were just doing…but in a form not shackled to the physical plane. Does that make sense?”

Adrien chewed on his lip as he made an attempt at understanding. “So…what you’re saying is that right now, you’re still kissing me and snuggling me and making love to me…but you’re doing it in music instead of physically?”

Luka nodded enthusiastically, clearly overjoyed that someone finally got a concept he’d struggled to express to four other people. “Yes! That’s it. That is exactly it. I never meant to make you feel neglected, P5. This is just me loving you in a different form.”

Adrien’s teeth sank further into his lip as he tried to be rational. “Okay. All right. I think I get it, but I think we’re going to need to work out some kind of compromise because, as you’ve no doubt noticed, I’m a very tactile person. When we do stuff like this, afterwards, I need snuggle time. I need kisses and caresses because if your hands aren’t on me, I feel like there’s a reason you don’t want your hands on me and that reason is that I did something wrong or you’re bored with me or I’m not desirable anymore or…” Adrien grinned sheepishly through his embarrassment. “Okay, yeah. I know it’s just another one of my silly dark spirals, but when it’s happening, it’s real for me. I _am_ afraid of losing you, you know. I’m still afraid of not being good enough, so…”

“Adrien,” Luka sighed mournfully, wrapping his arms around him and pushing him back down to the bed to cover in kisses and nuzzles. “I’m sorry, Baby…. I never…_ever_ meant to make you feel…like that,” Luka insisted between kisses.

“I know,” Adrien chuckled, feeling dumb. “I _know_. I just…my head is still a scary place sometimes…so, could I ask that you take a little time to snuggle and kiss after sexual activities? And then maybe announce that you need to go get an instrument but that you’ll be back? And then come back and sit next to me while you play so I can curl up around you or rest my head on your leg or wrap around you from behind or something, depending on what instrument you’re playing? I think maybe then I’ll be okay, but I really do need the physical contact.”

“Absolutely,” Luka assured, gently nipping at the underside of Adrien’s jaw like Adrien liked. “You just tell me what you need, and we’ll make it happen, okay?”

“You too,” Adrien stressed, turning the words back on Luka.

Luka grinned. “Yeah, okay. I will too…. I’m really glad we talked about this.”

“Mm,” Adrien hummed in agreement. “Talking is good. I’ll have to remember that.”

“See that you do. It’ll make this relationship more enjoyable,” Luka mumbled against Adrien’s lips.

“You know what would be really enjoyable?” Adrien moaned.

“Hm?”

“If you gave me a hickey,” Adrien suggested, baring his neck to Luka. “Seriously. Rip my throat out.”

Luka stifled a laugh as he shook his head fondly. “Is this your vampire thing?”

Adrien blushed, smiling sheepishly. “Yes? What? I’m a nerd. You knew this about me when you fell in love with me. Vampires are sexy.”

Luka partially obliged by giving Adrien’s throat a long lick.

Adrien arched into the contact.

“Don’t you have a photoshoot coming up? Your father is going to hate me,” Luka sighed.

“That’s Makeup’s problem. Please? Bite me,” Adrien whimpered.

Luka debated for a bit before vetoing the idea. He took Adrien’s wrist in his hand and brought it to his lips. “Didn’t you say something about vampires drinking from people’s wrists?”

Adrien’s eyes widened. He gulped and nodded.

Luka grinned, seeing that he’d hit upon a good idea. “And then maybe I can give you a hickey somewhere that won’t show up on camera…like your inner thigh. How would you like my bitemarks there?”

Adrien made a strangled sound of delight as Luka sank his teeth into Adrien’s wrist.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There. That was more or less what I wanted. ^.^ I discovered that my problem was letting them talk to one another. Whenever they start talking, they always get into these really long, usually important discussions, and then they start loving on one another, and then I can't get them apart. So the solution to get Luka out of bed was to not let them talk. Ha! I did it. I outsmarted them!
> 
> Ahem. So. Thoughts? Did you guys enjoy these three chapters? It was something different and kind of fun (and frustrating) to do. It's interesting to play around with the characters at different stages in the timeline. I really need to concentrate on writing the next part of Daisy, though so that I can keep updates regular.
> 
> Incidentally, which chapter has been your favourite so far?
> 
> I have the scenes that people requested done (Lukanette, Anarka's reaction to the situation, and Nino's reaction to the situation). I'm kind of proud of myself. I asked you guys what kind of scenes you wanted on Monday, 11/04/2019, right? I finished the requests on the morning of Tuesday, 11/12/2019. In total, it's four chapters and twenty-thousand-eight-hundred words. ^.^ 
> 
> So, yeah. I have to go back and edit all that, but I hope to have the first Luka(drie)nette chapter up on Friday 11/15/2019...if my job doesn't assassinate me between now and then. Wish me luck! Take care guys, and thanks for reading!


	18. Black and Blue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Apology scones, "whose side are you on?", Luka's "boyfriend", serenading, misunderstandings, lots of snuggling, and movie night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there everyone! Since the Jabberwocky chapter today doesn't have much new content, I really wanted to have something new for people to read. I had asked everyone what kind of scenes they'd be interested in seeing in the future, and Mireille asked for Lukanette. So here you go. You get a whole tractor trailer full of it. Adrien crops up here and there because he's a big part of their relationship, but the majority of the content is Lukanette: fluff, angst, awkwardness, and bittersweet moments. Enjoy!
> 
> This takes place during Jabberwocky in November on a Wednesday night when Luka is twenty-one and Marinette and Adrien are eighteen and a half.
> 
> A thought: I deal in unreliable narrators. Take everything with a pinch of sugar.

“I’m here! I’m here! I’m sorry!” a voice called out from abovedeck.

“Is everything okay? You’re not usually _this_ late,” Luka observed, voice thick with concern as Marinette came racing down the steps into the living room like a wildebeest stampede.

Luka dropped his phone onto the couch cushion and pushed his guitar out of the way as he hopped over the back of the sofa just in time to catch Marinette as she tripped on the second-to-last step.

She let out a reflexive yowl of alarm and went tumbling into Luka’s waiting arms.

He grunted as she hit his chest, but he didn’t let go, holding her fast. “You all right, Chanson?”

Marinette groaned as Luka helped her find her footing. She nodded until she got her breath back enough to reply, “Yeah. Yeah. I think—I mean, no,” she chuckled ironically. “No, I’m not, but—” She shook her head, getting ahold of herself. “What I mean is that I’m not hurt. Thank you.”

Marinette looked up at her boyfriend and smiled softly, eyes gentle and adoring. “You’re amazing, Luka. My hero.”

“I don’t know about that,” he chuckled, heart bursting into a million butterflies as she captured him in her net-like gaze.

“You _are_,” she insisted, arms moving to encircle his neck. “You always catch me when I’m falling.” Slowly, she leaned in and placed a kiss of profound gratitude on Luka’s cheek. “Thank you for being my safety net.”

“You don’t need a safety net,” Luka murmured, nuzzling her hair. “You’ve got wings, and you always catch yourself.”

Marinette shook her head. “I can only fly because I know you’re there to catch me if I fall.”

“All right,” Luka chuckled, admitting defeat. “You win. I’m your hero…” He pulled back to gaze into her eyes. “…and I’ve got you. No matter what, I’ve got you.”

Marinette gazed back, a charmed smile on her lips and a rosy blush tinting her cheeks.

Luka briefly debated trying for a real kiss.

They’d been doing better in recent weeks. Marinette had been trying really hard, but her head was still a mess of not wanting to use Luka as a rebound or, worse, a surrogate for Adrien and trying not to kiss Luka out of obligation because she felt like she _should_ kiss him or just because it felt good or because _Luka_ wanted to kiss _her_. It was more complicated than it ought to have been. It was unnatural, not the way a relationship was supposed to go, but…they were both hanging in there until Marinette’s love for Luka was the same kind of love that he felt for her.

Because she _did_ love him…as a person, as a friend. She thought he was attractive. She would happily make out with him. She’d said she would even be interested in sleeping with him…but that was just lust. She didn’t think about him the way he thought about her. Her heart didn’t start tripping all over itself just at the thought of him. She didn’t dream of possible futures with him. She didn’t name their imagined future children or their dog or their cat or their hamster. He wasn’t constantly on her mind. She didn’t see an object in a shop window and wonder what he would say about it. She didn’t watch a movie and imagine conversations they could have about it. She didn’t even hear a song played by a busker down in the Métro and wonder what Luka would think.

Luka was a friend that Marinette sometimes kissed when she thought she should or when her body wanted to. He was a close friend, a dear friend, and she loved him…as a person…but she wasn’t _in_ love with him.

Yet.

Or maybe ever.

He knew he was just there because he made her feel good. She had had a rough year with Adrien on top of the previous three and a half years of her taxing crush on him, and Luka made her feel better. He staunched the bleeding, made her feel loved. He was okay with that. He was trying to be okay with _just_ that for now.

And yet…it was so hard in that moment with her face a mere handspan away from his own.

He wondered if her heart was beating as fast as his with them so close together. Did their flirting affect her like it affected him? Maybe this time they could share a real kiss inspired by pure affection. Things had been getting better recently.

Luka leaned in just as his phone sounded with the siren leitmotif text tone, making Marinette move her head to look past him towards the couch.

“That’s that tune that’s been stuck in your head,” Marinette observed, pulling away now that the moment was over, clearly satisfied with the interaction and not wanting more from it. She went to the counter to set down her backpack on one of the colourful stools to make the bag easier to search through.

“Yeah,” Luka sighed, mentally noting the irony that was his life. “That’s the other song that’s been stuck in my head.”

“Why’d you set it as your text alert? I would think hearing it all the time would only get it stuck in your head more?” she chuckled as she fished a plastic container out of her bag.

Luka grimaced. “Uh…reasons?”

Marinette shrugged, not knowing to be upset. “Suit yourself.” She held out the container to him and grinned broadly. “Look. I made you blueberry lemon poppyseed scones.”

Luka’s face lit up. His _favourite_. He really hoped they had clotted cream left in the fridge.

“Chanson,” he cooed, coming over to accept the gift with one hand. He wrapped the other arm around her, pulling her into a side hug. “You didn’t have to do that. Thank you,” he whispered, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.

Marinette pulled back, laughing nervously. “Oh, don’t thank me yet.” Guilt shadowed her features like storm clouds looming over a picnic. 

Luka frowned, getting a bad feeling. “…These are apology scones, aren’t they?”

Marinette nodded, her left foot toing at the floorboards as she internally fretted.

“Oh,” Luka sighed. “…What are you apologizing for?”

She looked up at him, worrying at her bottom lip as she explained, “You know how on Saturday we were going to get dinner and go to that concert?”

The bottom dropped out of Luka’s stomach. He nodded.

“I’m sorry, Luka, but it’s looking like I’m going to have to work. We’ve got a big deadline coming up, and there had to be some lastminute changes, so…it’s going to be ‘all hands on deck’ Friday, Saturday, Sunday. Gabriel said that he really needs me there the whole time to manage the other interns…. I’m so sorry.” She looked up at him with big, cerulean eyes begging for forgiveness.

Luka shook his head, giving her a watery smile. “Don’t worry about it, Chanson.” He reached out to stroke her hair and face reassuringly. “It happens. Hey, at least this shows how much faith Gabriel has in you. It’s a good sign that he’s giving you that kind of responsibility. There will be other concert dates.”

She bit her lip, still looking unsure. “But you were really looking forward to it.”

He would have felt better if she had said that _she_ had been looking forward to it, but…

He shrugged. “It’s not a big deal.”

Marinette deflated, muttering, “I feel like I’m always letting you down like this.”

He beefed up his smile and ran a hand through her hair. “Marinette? You’re _not_,” he insisted quietly, gently, lovingly so that she almost believed him.

There was a moment of calm where they stood there looking at one another, and then Marinette spoke up.

“Why don’t you go with a friend instead?” she suggested. “That way the dinner reservation and the concert tickets won’t go to waste.”

Luka shifted the pastry container from his right hip to his left. “I can’t really think of anyone who’d want to get dinner and go see Lindsey Stirling with me.”

Well, there was the obvious choice, but asking Adrien Agreste to sub for Marinette on a date was…a surreal thought.

“How about Adrien?” Marinette stole the words from his head, and, before Luka could come up with a suitable excuse that wasn’t ‘Don’t send me on a date with him! He’ll end up in my bed and leave me feeling guilty and sexually frustrated in the morning’, Marinette had pulled out her phone and quickly typed, “hey you free saturday evening to go w luka dinner/concert”.

Adrien’s reply was immediate, “Definitely! Just have him text me the details, and I’ll pick him up.” followed by, “Since when do you pimp out your boyfriend, Princess?”

Marinette rolled her eyes. “your father = slave driver so i have to work instead of spending time w boyfriend”

“Sorry!” Adrien responded with a sad cat face emoji. “I’m more than happy to fill in, though. Your boyfriend is hot.” he added with a winking cat face emoji.

“should i be worried about you stealing him” Marinette laughed as she typed.

“What is he saying?” Luka inquired nervously.

“Definitely. I’ve been trying to seduce him away from you for months now.” Adrien responded, including a cat emoji with its tongue sticking out. “Unfortunately for me, he’s crazy in love with you and is resisting my efforts valiantly.”

“He says he’s happy to go with you, he thinks you’re hot, and he’s planning to steal you from me,” Marinette reported, shaking her head and smiling.

Luka blanched. “You know I would never cheat on you,” he rushed to assure. “Okay, sometimes I might encounter temptations, but…I would never cheat on you, Marinette. I love you.”

Marinette blinked in bewilderment as she looked up from her phone. “Luka, I’m not actually worried. I know you wouldn’t. I believe you.” She winced as the weight of her own hypocrisy came down on her once more. “Even though I’ve never been emotionally faithful to you, I know you would never cheat on me.” She looked at him with soft eyes and a pained, affectionate smile. “I really don’t deserve you.”

Luka gulped.

His tongue felt heavy and lifeless in his mouth. He knew now would be the time to tell her about Adrien. All he would have to say is, “Marinette, I’m actually bi, and I have a huge thing for Adrien. It’s probably a bad idea to let us go on a date because I don’t know how much longer I can _not_ kiss him”.

She looked back down at her phone and typed, “you’re so silly Minou” to Adrien accompanied by an emoji sticking its tongue out.

“That’s not true,” Luka mumbled as he set the container of scones down on the counter, losing his nerve to confess.

“Mm?” Marinette glanced back up. “What’s not true?”

“That you don’t deserve me,” Luka clarified. “I’m not as good as you think.”

Marinette tucked her phone back in her pocket and slipped her arms around Luka’s neck. “What’s wrong?”

His hands went to her hips, but he averted his eyes. “Sorry. Just feeling kind of down lately…but you _are_ good enough for me, so don’t doubt yourself. You’re trying, and things are getting better.”

“Why are you feeling down?” Marinette asked gently as Luka’s text tone sounded twice in succession.

Luka made a noncommittal sound and avoided her gaze.

“Is it because of me?” she guessed, starting to chew on her lip again.

He finally looked at her, shaking his head and assuring, “No, it’s not you. It’s me.”

Marinette frowned, not believing him, thinking he was trying to spare her feelings. “Okay. Well, is there anything I can do to help?”

Luka shook his head. “You’re already helping.”

“I don’t feel like I’m helping,” Marinette groaned.

“You are,” Luka insisted, pressing a kiss to her forehead before drawing back to look her intently in the eyes. “I’m really easy, Marinette. All it takes is a little evidence that someone is thinking about me to make me happy. Thoughtful gestures go a long way with me, and you are _full_ of thoughtful gestures.”

She opened her mouth to protest, but he cut her off.

“—Like bringing me my favourite scones,” he countered her unspoken argument.

“Those are apology scones,” she sighed.

“You could have just called off on me. Most people would have. I mean, you have a valid excuse, Marinette. It’s not like you’re ditching me to go to the movies with Alya and the girls. The apology scones were a thoughtful gesture. And you’re _always_ making and bringing me things,” he stressed, giving her hips a little squeeze. “Bringing me coffee when I’m writing a paper, coming to my concerts even when you don’t care for that particular band, making me clothes and accessories, helping out with Kitty Section, helping me make flashcards and study for exams… Marinette, this relationship may not be perfect, but I do know without a doubt that you care for me. …So…don’t discount your efforts,” he whispered tenderly and slowly started to lean in.

Marinette blinked but then realized what was happening and obediently shut her eyes, offering him her lips.

It wasn’t passionate. It was reserved, slow. Nice in general. Not the worst kiss ever. Not the best kiss ever. Not particularly enthusiastic, but not reluctant as other kisses had been. It was mediocre, and Luka would take it over his past failed attempts at kissing her.

Times before, she had given him her cheek or let him kiss her but was then obviously not into it. It had been like kissing a statue. Other times she had put some effort in and tried to kiss him back only to pull away during the kiss, apologize, and explain that she wasn’t ready, wasn’t in the right headspace.

This dispassionate, mediocre kiss was infinitely better. Did he feel wanted and loved? No, not particularly, but he didn’t feel repulsive either, like he was forcing her to kiss him. Luka could live with that, knowing that things were improving, had improved already, would improve more still in the future.

Luka’s phone sounded again, the siren leitmotif barging in on the kiss like an overly forceful extended metaphor.

Marinette pulled back with a chuckle. “Someone’s popular. That, or someone in particular _really_ wants to talk to you. Is that your other girlfriend?” she teased.

Luka grimaced. “Marinette, you know there’s no other woman on this earth for me.”

Her cheeks coloured, and she nodded, smiling bashfully. “Yeah. I know.”

“…That’s my _boy_friend texting,” Luka explained with a straight face.

Marinette cracked up, slapping him on the arm as she pulled away, shaking her head. “Yeah? And who’s your boyfriend?”

Luka held his breath. “Adrien Agreste.”

Marinette rolled her eyes, picking up the container of scones from the counter and pushing it back into his hands. “You have expensive taste in men.”

“I was kidding,” Luka rushed to take it back. “We’re not… Nothing’s happening between us right now.”

“I _know_ you’re kidding,” Marinette laughed, shaking her head and giving her boyfriend a light shove. “Now go put those scones away before your mother and sisters get at them.”

With a sigh and a shrug, Luka took the container to his room, hiding it in the bottom drawer of his nightstand.

When he came back, he found Marinette sitting on the couch, one leg tucked under her, the other pulled into her chest, _his phone_ in her hands.

His blood turned to cement.

“W-What are you doing?” His voice creaked.

She didn’t seem to notice as she smiled up at him. “Adrien has literally been blowing up your phone, so I switched it to silent. Also, Juleka wanted to know if you guys needed more tofu, mint tea, cheese snacks, or fruit cups. I told her there was a whole pack of tofu in the fridge, the box of mint teabags on the counter was still half full, and that I’d check with you on the cheese snacks and fruit cups because I didn’t see them anywhere in the kitchen.” She held out the phone to him.

In a daze, he took it, staring down in horror at his phone screen. “How did you get it unlocked?”

She shrugged. “You’ve unlocked your phone in front of me how many times now?”

Luka made a mental note to change his unlocking pictogram and to not leave his phone unattended in the presence of his girlfriend. He then made an additional mental note that he was really starting to act like a cheating slug.

“Don’t forget to reply to Juleka about the cheese and the fruit cups,” Marinette reminded, turning her attention to the guitar sprawled out on the other side of the couch, grabbing it, and pulling it into her lap into playing position.

“Right.” Luka tapped into the text conversation with his sister. “I’ll just get the cheese myself. Plagg is picky about brands,” he muttered distractedly, taking a seat beside her.

Marinette gave a jerk of surprise. “P-Plagg? You keep cheese for Plagg?”

Luka’s eyes widened as they shot up from his phone to meet Marinette’s. “Uuuhhh…Yes?”

Marinette blinked, befuddled. “Just how often is Adrien over here?” Suddenly, her tone turned angry and accusatory. “Does Juleka know about Plagg? God, how many people has that idiot told?! He’s so freaking irresponsible sometimes.” She pushed the guitar away and crossed her arms over her chest to keep from accidentally breaking something in her agitation. “Doesn’t he realize that Mayura is still out there? Okay, they don’t have the Butterfly Miraculous anymore, but what’s to stop them from sending sentimonsters out to destroy Paris? And what if some other supervillain comes into power? It’s not like Paris is safe now that Papillon no longer has his Miraculous. People could target Adrien for other reasons! It’s not safe to just go blabbing your secret identity to everyone and their sister. I just—God he makes me so angry sometimes. It’s like he doesn’t think. He just _does_, and then I have to clean up after him. Just—Grrr!” Marinette ended with a snort.

They sat in tense silence for a minute.

Marinette took a deep breath and let it out slowly, turning shamefacedly to her boyfriend. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to go off on you like that. He makes me insane with how reckless he is sometimes. He doesn’t even try to think. He expects me to do the thinking for him, and then he gets all mopey and petulant when I have to dress him down for his idiocy.” She took another long inhale, covering her face with her hands.

Luka bit his lip. “In his defence, his whole life, he’s been trained _not_ to think. You know, until recently, other people decided what he was going to wear each day. He didn’t even get to pick what he ate or what he did with his time. I’m not saying that he doesn’t need to learn to think for himself because he definitely _does_, but maybe you should try to take his situation into account and cut him some slack.”

“You’re always on his side,” Marinette grumbled, looking away sullenly. “You’re not the one who has to deal with him. You don’t have a whole city expecting you to fix things all the time. You have no idea what this is like.”

“Chanson,” Luka crooned softly, reaching out to pull her into him.

She let him wrap around her, and then she trapped his arms in the embrace with her own. She leaned back, resting her head against his shoulder.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, giving the top of her head an airy kiss. “I know you’re under a lot of stress. It must be such a huge weight you feel like you have to carry alone.”

“Mm,” she agreed.

“I’m sorry,” he repeated into her hair, squeezing her reassuringly. “Tell me if there’s ever anything you need. You know I’d do anything to help.”

“Mm,” she mumbled again.

He dropped his lips to her shoulder, planting a reverent trail of kisses up her neck. “I’m sorry that it feels like I’m not on your side. I wasn’t trying to make you feel like you were in the wrong.”

“…Everyone’s always yelling at me for being mean to poor, defenseless Adrien like he can do no wrong and I’m just a bully or something,” she sniffled. “Everyone’s always making excuses for him. And, yeah, I get it. It’s not entirely his fault that he’s messed up, but… It just feels like no one ever makes excuses for _me_. If I mess up, I’m the biggest witch of the century. I’m expected to be perfect all the time, but, in reality, I’m constantly screwing up.”

She laughed bitterly at her situation. “I’m screwing up right this very minute because here I am with this wonderful boyfriend, and I’m griping about some other guy instead of just being happy with what I have. I’m so sorry, Luka. You deserve better than this.”

“Shhh,” he whispered against the shell of her ear. “It’s okay. We’re good, Chanson.”

She shook her head.

“No we’re not” was left unspoken but felt.

“Sorry,” he whispered. “I didn’t mean to make you feel like your feelings weren’t valid. I know how maddening it can be dealing with Adrien, and what helps me is considering where he’s coming from and what he’s thinking when he does things that drive me bats. It’s easier to be patient and sort out the problem when you know _why_ there’s a problem in the first place. I know you’re a logical problem-solver, so I thought understanding the disconnect might help. I didn’t mean to take his side.”

Luka took a deep breath. “…And I’m sorry about the secret identities thing. I know it bothers you that I know. I swear to you I never meant to find out.”

“I know,” Marinette mumbled in frustration, squeezing his arms to her tighter. “That was Adrien’s carelessness.”

“He didn’t mean to,” Luka offered half-heartedly, nervous about defending Adrien again and seeming to be “on his side” instead of Marinette’s.

She exhaled audibly.

“My family doesn’t know about Plagg and Nooroo, if that helps,” Luka tried.

Marinette shifted to look back at him incredulously. “You know who Swallowtail is.”

Luka decided he had better shut up.

“Let me guess,” Marinette snorted. “It was an accident?”

“Adrien had had Nooroo for less than twenty-four hours,” Luka explained feebly. “When Adrien visited me and Plagg came out to get cheese, Nooroo didn’t know he was supposed to stay hidden. It wasn’t even Adrien’s fault.”

“When is it ever Adrien’s fault?” Marinette grumbled, pulling away.

Luka bit his lip and took a moment to analyze the situation. “…Are you two fighting again?” he hazarded. “Or what’s going on? You’re all over the place today. Your emotions are like a seismograph.”

“It’s nothing,” she muttered, looking down at the floor and wrapping her arms around herself.

He scooted closer, taking her into his arms once more. “Chanson,” he whispered against her neck. “Marinette, talk to me.”

“It’s _everything_,” she confessed with a sigh, letting herself slump against him again. “It’s like I’m fighting everyone all at once. The other interns hate me. Alya and I have been constantly rubbing each other the wrong way for the past two weeks. Maman is driving me nuts about this whole having a boyfriend thing and my relationship with Adrien and—she’s on his side too, did you know?” Marinette scoffed. “They’re friends. They get coffee together on Sundays. _Chloé_ goes too sometimes, and sometimes, when my parents know I’m going to be out, they invite Adrien over. They have dinner and play board games and video games and stuff while I’m gone.”

“That makes you uncomfortable,” Luka surmised.

“Of course it makes me uncomfortable,” Marinette answered, voice high, on the brink of hysteria. “There’s this guy that I have a very complicated relationship with stealing my parents the moment I turn my back. Like, they’re _my_ parents. They’re supposed to be on _my_ side, for crying out loud! And do you know what my mom said when I told her about how I felt?”

“What?” Luka prompted, letting Marinette feel like at least one person was hearing her.

“She said I was overreacting and being childish,” Marinette choked as tears gradually started to escape their confinement chambers. “She said she was disappointed in how uncharitable I was acting. Because apparently Adrien’s such a nice, sweet boy, and he’s my friend, and we should all feel sorry for him because he doesn’t have a mother and his father’s been treating him like crap for the past eighteen years. It’s not _my_ fault he has a train wreck for a family. I don’t see why I have to share mine with him. They’re mine,” she whimpered. “They’re supposed to be mine. I’m supposed to be able to count on them no matter what. They’re supposed to be on my side, but they’re not.”

“Shh.” Luka gently began to rock her from side to side, rubbing at her arms, trying to sooth her.

“Instead, it’s ‘poor Adrien’. Everywhere I go, he’s the victim, and it’s all my fault for not being perfect. God, it feels like the situation with Lila all over again with everyone turning on me. I know Adrien isn’t doing this. I know this isn’t some heinous scheme with an evil mastermind this time, but…it feels like I can’t count on anyone right now.”

“Oh my sweet Third,” he mumbled into her hair, holding her tighter, wondering why she hadn’t said anything, why she’d let it get to this point, why she hadn’t come to him, why he hadn’t even noticed she was drowning.

He’d been too caught up in himself.

She blinked away tears and looked up at him, eyes searching his. “But at least I have you,” she whispered. “You don’t think I’m selfish and childish. You don’t think I’m a bad person for feeling this way. _You’re_ on my side, aren’t you? …_You’re_ mine…right?”

She said the words with such desperation, like she needed them to be true or she would break.

She was letting herself be vulnerable with him. She’d let down her walls and let him see the scared, exhausted, weak parts of herself. She was trusting him to make good on his promises to always be there for her, to always have her back.

It was like a hot stiletto knife to the gut for Luka. How had he failed her so spectacularly?

He couldn’t lie to her. He couldn’t say that he was hers. His heart was divided, and it felt like an insult to betray her trust when she needed someone to tell her the truth.

So he told her a different truth: “I love you, Marinette…and I’m so sorry you’re feeling like this.”

She closed her eyes and melted into him as he began to pet her hair in long, attentive strokes.

“I wish you’d said something sooner,” he mumbled, feeling the ache of guilt between his ribs. “I wish you hadn’t kept suffering alone in silence. I know you’re tough, Chanson, but human beings can only endure so much.”

She shook her head halfheartedly. “It’s not really that bad. Most of the time I’m fine,” she murmured. “It’s just…some days it all gets to be too much, and I just lose it. Normally I can handle it, but…today was just one of those days. …Sorry you’re getting to see the ugly fallout.”

Luka frowned. “You do know that I don’t just love the quote, unquote ‘pretty’ parts of you, right?”

She opened her eyes and looked back at him in surprise.

“Marinette,” he sighed. “I don’t love you because you’re perfect. One of the things I find most attractive about you is your ability to pick yourself up off your butt and try again in the face of adversity. Your tenacity and your passion, the way you throw yourself into things…that’s what makes you so beautiful. You’re not a quitter, and I adore that about you. You may be down right now, but I know you’ll find some way to come out on top in the end. You’re resourceful and resilient, and you’re going to conquer the dark parts of yourself. …You’re the most amazing girl I know.” He put his all into those words, hoping she could believe them as strongly as he did.

She shook her head and smiled sadly. “That’s Ladybug.”

He took her by the chin and made her look at him. “That’s _Marinette Dupain-Cheng_…and she is _epic_.”

Marinette laughed, dabbing at her eyes. “Yeah?”

“_Yes_,” he affirmed. “Chanson, I admire you so much…even when you need to stop to cry…. I don’t love you because you’re perfect; I love you because you’re not…but you keep fighting anyway.”

“Keep fighting, huh?” she sighed, turning in his hold to wrap her arms around his torso and tuck her head under his chin. “But I’m so tired right now, Luka.”

“Then take a break,” he suggested, squeezing her reassuringly. “I’ve got you. Rest, My Love. Stay safe in my arms until you’re ready to stand up and fight again.”

“_You_ are epic, Luka Couffaine,” she mumbled against his throat, sending shivers rippling out through his body.

…He couldn’t tell her about Adrien. Not now. Now was _not_ a good time…but when was it ever a good time? They’d been dating for about five months, and he had never come across a good opportunity to break the news of his past with Adrien and his current feelings to her.

It was starting to fester between them, and she had no idea.

They stayed wrapped in each other’s arms for a time, enjoying the warmth and solidity of each other. Three minutes passed before Marinette found her voice to speak up.

“You and Adrien are pretty close, right?” she inquired, making him freeze in alarm.

“Yeah?” he answered tentatively. Her tone sounded conversational, but…what had Adrien said in his texts that night? Had Marinette read them? Just glimpsed them out of context? “I mean, I’m not Nino or anything, but I’ll flatter myself and say that I’m a close second. Why?”

She swallowed and asked, “Has he said anything to you about his new girlfriend?”

It was like being knocked off his feet and landing flat on his back. “Wh-What?”

Luka pushed back from Marinette to look down at her in total confusion. “What girlfriend? He hasn’t mentioned—He doesn’t have a girlfriend. I mean, I would know if-if…”

It was funny in a way. There Luka was cheating on Marinette with Adrien, and now it was Luka’s turn to feel the sting and burn of infidelity. It felt like having a hole punched through his insides.

“What are you talking about?” he inquired weakly, feeling sick.

Marinette frowned. “He hasn’t mentioned anyone?”

Luka shook his head helplessly. “How do you know he has a girlfriend?”

“I saw them together in the library today. I was going to camp out back in the lounge area and try to get my reading done for History, since I’m going to be working all weekend, but Adrien and his girlfriend were already in there, and they looked like they were having a serious discussion, whispering to one another. I was going to leave and find someplace else, but…” She started to squirm. “I saw the look on his face, the way he was looking at her, and…it just…I was confused because he was…” She shook her head as if to clear it. “And then they were pressing their palms together and leaning into one another, and-and kissing! He kissed her. And then they were talking, and I was just staring from behind the shelves, and a couple seconds later he kissed her again! And then they were laughing, but then they were whispering all serious again and pressing their palms together, and he kissed her again! So I left, and I thought…I thought…”

She shook her head again and looked up at him helplessly. “He hasn’t said anything about a girlfriend or a girl he likes? I mean, as his friend, I’m concerned. If he’s dating a bunch of girls again like he did at the beginning of the year…and, I mean, I should probably check this girl out and make sure she’s good for him, shouldn’t I? As his friend? Because Adrien can be so blind when he’s in love. He does really stupid things. _Someone_ should talk to him, don’t you think?”

Luka stared at his girlfriend as the pieces began to sink into place. “Who is this girl? Do you know her? What does she look like?”

Marinette looked away, shrugging. “I don’t think I’ve seen her before. She’s his usual type, though. Short, dark hair. I think she’s some kind of Asian ethnicity, maybe Japanese? I don’t know. I couldn’t hear what they were saying, so I didn’t catch him saying her name, but…they looked completely smitten. I’m really worried about this.”

Luka breathed an enormous sigh of relief, all the hurt and fear leaving his system at once, leaving him laughing giddily. “Don’t be, Chanson. Her name is Yumi or Ayumi or something, and she’s in his acting class. They’re partners for this week’s exercise. What you saw was them practicing the party scene from Romeo and Juliet where the lovers meet.”

Luka knew this because Adrien had had him reading Juliet’s lines earlier that week, helping Adrien to memorize his part. There had been much pressing of palms and smitten gazing then too. Luka had drawn the line at kissing, even if it was just stage kissing, for fear that it might quickly escalate into actually cheating on his girlfriend.

Marinette’s entire face from the tip of her nose to the tips of her ears went bright red. “Oh. So…he’s not…dating anyone? I…shouldn’t be worried?—On his behalf. As his friend.”

Luka shook his head slowly. “Nope. You have nothing to worry about. _You_ are the only girl that Adrien has eyes for.”

Her blush increased, and she looked away. “I wasn’t…”

“Shh.” He took her hand and gave it a squeeze, leaning in to kiss the top of her head. “It’s okay, Chanson. I know you still have feelings for him, even if those feelings are complicated. It hurt seeing him with someone else, didn’t it?”

She wouldn’t look at him. “…Sorry,” she whispered in such a tiny, miserable voice.

“It’s okay,” he assured.

That, at least, partially explained the mood she was in, her little outburst, lashing out at Adrien. In a way, it made things simpler for Luka. Marinette was feeling overwhelmed in general, and Adrien today had been the final straw.

In a way, it made things complicated because Adrien was hurting Marinette and Luka, Marinette was hurting Adrien and Luka, and Luka got to be Marinette’s comfort object while sneaking around behind her back with Adrien, hurting Adrien who just wanted someone to love him, Marinette who had no idea the extent of the tangle they were in, and even Luka himself who was beginning to really feel the stress and fatigue of their situation.

“Do you want me to play you a song?” Luka offered, knowing that music would calm both of their hearts more than words.

She nodded, handing him the guitar and then sinking back into the couch cushions, hugging her knees to her chest and settling in to listen.

He played whatever came into his head but intentionally steered clear of any chord progressions that might segue into the siren leitmotif. He played the phoenix one instead. The melody in E major was soft and mellow like a down comforter. It glided gracefully like a swan across a pond before soaring triumphantly.

It was like Marinette: gentle but strong. Not showy, not proud, but beautiful and elegant. Constantly rising up out of the ashes, constantly reinventing herself. Creative rebirth and renewal whenever her current pursuits met a dead end. Always shifting, moving, changing, but oddly constant. Dependable. Solid. Lovely and regal. A commanding but unassuming presence. Even when she wandered or strayed or got lost, she was still lovely, lovable. Even when she hurt him, he treasured her.

His Marinette sparkled and soared.

Her head came to rest on his shoulder, and he took note of the peaceful smile on her face.

He placed a whisper-soft kiss on her forehead.

The song continued for another minute or two before the chords slowed, resolving finally from the dominant back to the tonic E. Luka let the notes resonate for a pregnant moment before setting his guitar to the side to take his girlfriend into his arms once more.

“You make such beautiful things,” Marinette mumbled, keeping her eyes closed and enjoying the spell Luka had cast for just a little longer.

“That song was you,” he quietly informed. “It’s only beautiful because you are.”

She opened her eyes and really looked at him, wondering why she couldn’t just love this wonderful boy already. He loved and respected her. He put up with all of her nonsense. He accepted her, comforted her, took care of her… He was everything she needed him to be whenever she needed him. She _did_ love him. There was no question about that. He was precious and dear to her. She even found him physically attractive. She just wasn’t _in_ love with him.

He made her stomach flutter with lust, but he didn’t make her swoon. She wasn’t able to summon up the kind of all-consuming, self-sacrificial, can’t-sleep-for-thinking-about-him love she thought she ought to feel. She didn’t get lost in him. She didn’t love him the way she should.

She felt bad about it because he deserved so much more. What kind of partner was she for him? He deserved better.

Marinette looked into Luka’s eyes, took a calming breath, and leaned in to kiss him. She thought of green eyes and blonde hair and black leather cat ears, focusing on the image and how it made her feel, transferring those feelings onto the man in front of her in order to kiss him the way he deserved to be kissed.

Luka responded at once, eager and hungry, thinking he’d finally done it, he’d finally done something that had made her want him the way he wanted her.

The guitar clattered to the floor as Luka pushed Marinette back and down onto the sofa, following her without breaking the kiss. She wrapped her legs around him, pulling him in as their tongues danced wildly.

He repositioned as he slowly began to trail kisses down the side of her face, licking and nipping her ear, sucking on her neck. His lips began to wander down her throat, following the cut of her shirt’s neckline. He placed a lingering kiss in the valley between her breasts, causing her to gasp and moan.

“_Minou_.”

Luka froze, pulled back, and looked down at Marinette in confusion, hoping she could clear up the misunderstanding.

She was staring up at him in horror, her hand clapping over her traitorous mouth.

His heart cracked. 

She hadn’t been kissing him after all.

_He_ hadn’t done anything to inspire passion in her. It was all Adrien.

Luka pulled away, cleared his throat, and retrieved his guitar from the floor, beginning to strum it mindlessly in a way that sounded almost atonal.

“Luka, I am so sorry. I didn’t mean to… I just…” She groaned, sitting up and pulling her knees into her chest, curling into a little ball. “I was trying to kiss you like you wanted to be kissed. I thought…”

“Thinking about another guy while you’re kissing me isn’t kissing _me_…. It’s kissing _him_ and toying with my feelings,” he mumbled thickly, voice getting stuck on the words as his heart oozed out through the notes in sharp cries of dissonant pain.

They sat, not speaking, for a few minutes, Luka’s agonized guitar the only sound in the main cabin of the ship.

Marinette swallowed hard and got to her feet. “I’m sorry. I should go.”

With a sigh, Luka set down the guitar and caught her by the wrist. “Don’t go.”

He tugged on her gently, and she obediently sat beside him, letting him pull her back into his arms.

“Sorry for being a drama queen,” he muttered.

“Luka, you’re _not_,” Marinette stressed. “I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you. I was just…trying to be a real girlfriend. This is what I mean when I say I always screw everything up. You should really just let me go home now before I do or say something else that makes it all worse.” She made a halfhearted attempt at pulling away, but he held her fast.

“Don’t go,” he repeated. “It’s fine. You’re fine. I’m just being too sensitive. Just…stay, okay?”

Marinette bit her lip and considered. “…Are you sure you even want to be around me?”

He rested his head against hers and nodded so that she could feel it. He squeezed her to him tighter. “I always want to be around you…. Besides, if you go, I’ll only end up texting Adrien, and he’ll sense that something’s wrong and wind up coming over here, and I’ll probably end up making out with him because, honestly, he’s just irresistible like that, and then I’ll feel guilty and like a horrible person for cheating on my amazing…” He kissed her cheek. “…beautiful…” He kissed her again. “…thoughtful girlfriend.” He punctuated the statement with yet another kiss.

Marinette giggled, turning to nuzzle Luka’s ear. “I wouldn’t be able to hold it against you. Adrien _is_ pretty hot, after all.”

A stray thought wandered through Marinette’s mind: Adrien and Luka making out. She was surprised to find that it was a pleasant mental image.

“Is that why you don’t want to go to the opera with him next Tuesday? You’re afraid of being tempted?” she hummed teasingly.

Luka grimaced, realizing he’d made a mistake in joking about his affair with Adrien. She was going to tease him about this in the future until he was guilt-tripped into finally explaining that it was the truth.

“So you _did_ look at my texts.” Luka clicked his tongue, pretending to chide.

Marinette shrugged. “You should go with him. He was begging so prettily.”

“I mean, sitting in a dark theatre box alone with Adrien Agreste for four hours watching an opera about two people who are going insane because they can’t consummate their love…yeah. That sounds like a really fun test of my willpower. Chanson, are you trying to push me into Adrien’s arms?”

Marinette rolled her eyes, pulling back to sit beside him with one of his arms loosely around her shoulders. “In all seriousness, why don’t you want to go with him? You guys go all the time and seem to have fun. I don’t think he has anyone else, and he really just wants someone to pay attention to him. I think he’s lonely since all of his other friends are pairing off in couples and he’s the only one without a love interest.”

Luka blinked at her, wondering how she could be this blind. He was pretty sure it was plain to everyone else that Adrien had at least _two_ serious love interests, but…

“What if I were bi and actually struggling with feelings for Adrien?” Luka posited in the most neutral tone he could manage. “Would you still be telling me to spend time with him?”

Marinette blinked, clearly thrown off by this line of questioning seemingly coming completely out of the blue. “I…guess I would be telling you…to do whatever you were comfortable with,” she answered slowly. “…Where did that ‘what if’ come from?”

Luka shrugged, looking away. “What are you doing next Tuesday? Maybe we could invite Adrien over for dinner and a movie. That would be a nice break for you after working all weekend, right? I’ll cook,” he volunteered. “You just have to show up, eat, and snuggle.”

“That sounds amazing,” Marinette sighed happily. “Here.” She picked his phone up from where it had fallen to the floor in their scuffle and handed it to him. “Text your boyfriend and let him know we’re on for date night on Tuesday.”

Luka took the phone and was dismayed to find twenty-seven new texts from Adrien. Luka winced.

Marinette raised a concerned eyebrow. “What is it?”

Luka shook his head. “Someone has been blowing up my phone this whole time. I have twenty-seven texts.”

Marinette bit her lip and chuckled. “Woooow. Your boyfriend is needy.”

Luka gave a snort as he scrolled quickly through the messages, getting the gist of Adrien’s rapidly changing mental state. “You would know. Wasn’t he _your_ boyfriend for, like, twelve hours?”

Marinette shrugged, pulling out her own phone to text Alya. “Under false pretenses. _I_ was dating _Chat Noir_.”

“Newsflash: they’re not that different,” Luka mumbled, finally reaching the end of the texts just as another one apologizing came in.

“…They’re not, are they?” Marinette hummed thoughtfully.

Adrien’s messages were a mix of begging Luka to go to see [Tristan und Isolde](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tristan_und_Isolde) on Tuesday, flirting and suggestive comments about subbing for Marinette on the concert date on Saturday, apologizing for laying it on too thick, and panicking about supposedly having made Luka mad.

“hey ariel” “not mad just have company” “im not gonna be checking my phone much tonight” “hard no on the opera” “wanna come over for dinner/movie/snuggling with me and marinette instead”, Luka sent off consecutively in a flurry of thumbs and then awaited the anticipated affirmative response.

“Okay, but I want to spend time with YOU.” Adrien replied.

“ill be there” Luka responded, wishing Adrien could be less difficult.

“Ha. Ha.” Adrien answered petulantly.

“well be hanging out saturday for dinner/concert” “well spend time together”

Adrien was silent for a beat too long.

Marinette put away her phone and looked at Luka with an expectant smile. “What does he say?”

“He’s ecstatic for date night,” Luka lied. “He said he’ll be looking forward to it…but I kind of get the feeling something’s up. He’s…” Luka bit his lip. “I guess in ‘needy mode’. I think that you’re right that he’s lonely and wants attention.”

Marinette nodded slowly in understanding. “Maybe I’ll talk to Nino about it. He’s really good at handling Adrien’s moods.”

“See if he can take Adrien on a friend date,” Luka suggested before turning back to his phone.

There were no new messages from Adrien.

Luka’s teeth sank into his lip once more, and he looked up at Marinette. “Sorry. I get the feeling that something’s not right. Can I give him a call real quick? Seriously. Five minutes.”

Marinette nodded encouragingly. “Yeah, of course. I mean, he’s my friend too, so of course I’m worried about him.”

Luka gave his girlfriend a grateful smile. “Could you please get in touch with Nino to see if he could just happen to call in, like, ten minutes to invite Adrien on a friend date or something?”

Marinette gave Luka a thumbs up and took out her phone once more.

Adrien picked up the call on the first ring. “Hey, Orpheus. What’s up?” The nonchalance in his voice was obviously forced. He must have been truly tired if he couldn’t put up a convincing front. Or maybe he _wanted_ Luka to know that he wasn’t okay?

“Ariel, hey,” Luka breathed into the receiver. “Look. Like I said, I have company over, so I can’t really talk right now, but I wanted to make sure you were okay. What’s wrong? Cliffs Notes version?”

Adrien gave a little snort of laughter. “Tired. Lonely. Working too hard getting this new line out. Did something bad today. Really want to make out with someone and forget about my problems, but know that that’s a bad idea and what got me into my current mess in the first place. The End.”

Luka sighed, reaching up to run a hand through his hair. “Is there anything I can do for you in four minutes?”

Adrien considered for a moment and then shook his head wearily. “No, I don’t think so. Honestly, I objectively know that everything is fine and I’m just in a bit of a funk because the Romeo and Juliet scene I’m working on for Friday has me thinking about the tragedy that is my own love life on top of being drained from work, so…I probably just need sleep, but…” He trailed off with an almost inaudible sigh.

“Hey. Do me a favor and talk to someone, okay? As soon as you get off the phone with me, call Nino or go sit with your parents, but don’t be alone in your room thinking about how crappy you feel right now. Can you please do that for me?” Luka gently entreated.

“…All right. Okay, fine,” Adrien agreed with a little huff, pretending to be put out.

“Okay? You’re going to be all right?” Luka verified.

“Yep. All set to call Nino as soon as we hang up. No worries, Orpheus,” Adrien assured. “Go back to what you were doing. I don’t want to keep you from hanging with your friends.”

“Okay,” Luka sighed, reluctant to let him go. “All right. I’m going to ring off.”

“Bye-bye, Luka.”

Luka bit the inside of his cheek. “Hey. I love you, all right? Take care of yourself.”

Adrien’s line was quiet for a moment before he replied in a surprised yet pleased tone, a smile in his voice, “Thanks. I love you too.”

Luka nodded, feeling better about the situation. “Bye, Adrien.”

“Bye, Orpheus.”

“He’s okay?” Marinette looked up at Luka in concern.

Luka nodded, setting his phone down on the makeshift coffee table. “What did Nino say?”

“He’ll call Adrien in ten minutes and coordinate with Gabriel if Adrien doesn’t pick up,” she reported. “…What was wrong?”

Luka shrugged, placing his arm around her shoulders again. “Like you thought. He’s just a little down right now, but he knows why, and he knows things will be better if he just gets some sleep. I’m concerned, but I’m not too worried.”

Marinette nodded, leaning into him. “…Wanna watch a movie and snuggle? I could really use some snuggling.”

“Sure. Which movie?” he easily agreed.

“The one you were talking about a couple weeks ago,” she suggested, chewing on her lip, fishing around in her memory for the name. “The one that was based on a book written by the lead singer of that one band that did a concept album. Uh…like…something about clocks…and Bacchus?” She started to laugh at herself. “You know what I’m talking about. Help.” She swatted his arm as he began to chuckle too.

“The band is [_Dionysos_](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dionysos_\(French_band\)), but good job with ‘Bacchus’. Very close. The movie is [Jack et la Mécanique du Coeur](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HvWNbxvmUaE) or [Jack and the Cuckoo-Clock Heart](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jack_and_the_Cuckoo-Clock_Heart),” he supplied. “Are you sure that’s what you want to watch? It’s kind of a quirky movie…weird.”

Marinette shrugged. “I can do quirky. Is it weirder than some of the anime Adrien has shown you? Because that’s kind of the benchmark for me.”

Luka thought about it for a moment before shaking his head. “No. [Rave Master](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rave_Master) was weirder.”

Marinette nodded, satisfied with the answer. “All right, then. Go get your laptop.”

Luka did as bid, dropping a kiss on the top of her head as he got to his feet.

When he came back, he found that Marinette had made a nest of cushions at the bend in the couch.

“Sit,” she decreed, taking the laptop from him.

Luka sat where indicated among the pillows, and he was slightly surprised when Marinette took a seat as well, nestling herself between his legs, leaning back against him with her head resting back against his shoulder, tucked under his chin.

She took his arms and wrapped them snuggly around herself. She placed the laptop on her own lap and looked up behind her at him, seeking approval. “Is this okay?”

“Scoot your hips forward just a smidge, please,” he requested, and she acquiesced.

Just as the movie started, Luka’s phone lit up, and he reached out to check it.

Adrien’s sulky message read, “You didn’t have to sic Nino and my parents on me.” accompanied by an annoyed cat emoji.

Luka smirked and set his phone back down.

Marinette inclined her neck to give Luka a questioning glance even though she had been able to see the screen plainly.

“He’s all right,” Luka whispered into her hair. “Sorry. No more interruptions. I promise.”

Marinette hummed in the affirmative, turning her attention back to the film.

It was then that it occurred to Luka that his phone had magically teleported between the time he had set it down before going to get his laptop and the time he had come back with the laptop. Just now when Luka had picked up his phone, it had been on the opposite side of the coffee table from where he had left it. Meaning that Marinette had been looking at his phone.

Suddenly, Luka felt uneasy. Why would she do that? What had she been expecting to find there? What had she _actually_ found?

Luka reinforced his mental note about changing the design he used to unlock his phone. He added an additional note about being a better boyfriend in general.

Luka had a lot of good qualities, but he wasn’t perfect. There were things he needed to be doing better. They _both_ had to do better if they wanted this to work.

Luka was committed to making this work, and he got the sense that Marinette was too…in a desperate, trying-to-keep-herself-from-drowning kind of way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that was part one of the Lukanette. There will be more at the start of next chapter, but then it transitions into Adrienette and Lukadrien. But we'll save next time for next time.
> 
> What did you think? I think Lukanette is really complicated in general and especially so in this storyline. I think Adrien and Luka are both really intense in love. They love deeply, and they're staunchly loyal. The way I've written Marinette here, it was my idea that she's eighteen, and she doesn't really understand "love". She's seen the movies and TV shows. She's had crushes. She's interested in having physical relationships with Luka and Adrien, but she isn't at a point where she can wrap her head around unwavering devotion, compromise, sacrifice, and unfailingly embracing the ugly sides of people along with the attractive aspects. Sometimes she grasps pieces of it here and there. We've seen in canon that Marinette really has a big heart and she's always helping others and putting others before herself. She'll get it eventually, but right now in the story she's a little lost. Adrien hurt her a lot in Daisy, and she's still recovering from that. She's figuring out how to forgive and move on and love again, love on another level.
> 
> At the same time, she's trying to give Luka a chance. She's trying to return his affections and be what she thinks a "real" girlfriend should be to him. Instead of patiently growing into the relationship, she's trying to force it. She's trying to stretch herself and make herself fit, and it's not going very well. She's not being true to herself.
> 
> That's the way I'm trying to write Marinette, anyway. What do you think? Did any of that come through in the chapter? What do you think about Luka and Marinette? I think there's a lot of brokenness, but there's a lot of potential too. There are moments when they really do work. They can be disgustingly sweet and fluffy for all the train wreck that they are other times.
> 
> I hope you liked it. I was a little nervous about this dynamic because Marinette's feelings are all mixed up right now. She has a hard time justifying them and explaining them to herself, so I fear she might not make sense to readers. I think that, in real life, people don't make sense all the time. They do things they know they shouldn't. They say things they don't mean, and not even they know why they do things sometimes. Human beings aren't very logical. They're very contrary, and that's kind of what I was going with with Marinette in this series.
> 
> A parting thought: Marinette doesn't call Luka by a nickname.
> 
> The next part should be up on Monday, 11/18/2019. I don't think I ever asked: Is there a particular day that works best for updates for you guys? Thanks for reading!
> 
> References:  
Tristan und Isolde: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tristan_und_Isolde  
Dionysos: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dionysos_(French_band)  
Jack et la Mécanique du Coeur Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HvWNbxvmUaE  
Jack and the Cuckoo-Clock Heart: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jack_and_the_Cuckoo-Clock_Heart  
Rave Master: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rave_Master


	19. The Seagull

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lukanette, Adrienette, and Lukadrien.
> 
> In which Marinette spends the night, Adrien feels betrayed, and Luka tries to keep everything from imploding.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! I hope this update finds you well. I've been feeling super stressed and worn down. -.-; Thanks to everyone who commented on the last chapter. Thank you as well to everyone who has bookmarked the story or left kudos. Today's chapter is a direct continuation of the previous one. This one wraps up the Lukanette that Mireille requested and sets things up for the scene that Buggy requested with Anarka. That will be next time.
> 
> Quick Note: The lines Adrien and Rose are reading are from the end of the play The Seagull by Anton Chekhov. Spoilers for The Seagull. Instead of using punctuation exactly as is from the text, I changed some of the punctuation to reflect Adrien’s delivery of the lines.
> 
> This takes place during Jabberwocky/Daisy on a Wednesday night and Thursday morning in November when Marinette and Adrien are eighteen and a half. Rose is eighteen, and Luka is twenty-one.

Nearly two hours later, Marinette sat up and looked back at Luka. “The movie can’t end like that. That’s not a happy ending. What gives?”

Luka could only shrug helplessly. “I like it. It’s bittersweet.”

Marinette shook her head in amazement. “I want ‘and they lived happily ever after’.”

Luka shrugged again, wondering absentmindedly if Adrien would like the movie. Adrien’s favourite type of ending involved the lovers both dying, their love frozen in time forever, untouchable, unable to fade or sour or break like so many of the relationships Adrien had experienced in real life.

“If it makes you feel better, the book’s ending is worse,” Luka offered.

Marinette glared at him. “You know what? That doesn’t make me feel better at all. What happens at the end of the book?”

Luka shook his head. “[Spoilers](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U2QzL3IQ6zs).”

“You sound like Adrien,” Marinette accused.

“He’s rubbed off on me.”

Marinette’s glare intensified. “Lord, help us. Just don’t you dare start on the puns.”

“You _like_ the puns when he’s not fooling around during a fight,” Luka reminded. “_You_ pun back.”

She looked away with a snort. “Do not. …What happens in the book?”

“The book is more…cynical and disillusioned as a whole. It’s really different throughout. I think you should stick to the family-friendly version,” Luka suggested.

Marinette turned and studied his face for a full thirty seconds before she sighed and shrugged. “I want Miss Acacia’s dress.”

“So _make_ her dress. Red is a beautiful colour on you, Chanson; I’d love to see it,” he encouraged with an easy smile.

Marinette’s cheeks slowly started to pinken. “I’ll have to add it to my list of potential projects.” She bit her lip, averting her eyes and then sneaking glances back at him. “But…actually…I’m thinking that _blue_ is my colour.”

Luka blinked at her dumbly. “Blue? I mean, I’m sure you’re gorgeous in any colour, Marinette, but why blue?”

Marinette suddenly lost all coyness and turned to stare at him, defeated. “You know. _Blue_,” she hinted.

His eyebrows slowly found one another in a deep frown. “Like…your eyes?” he ventured.

Marinette groaned, covering her face for a moment before meeting his gaze once more, explaining in consternation, “Blue like _your_ eyes, like _your_ hair. Honey. Blue is _your_ colour. I’m trying to be a real girlfriend over here, appealing to your macho, possessive nature by publicly advertising that I’m _yours_ through my clothing choices. Work with me here because this is all I have going for me.”

“Oh, wow,” Luka chuckled, face going grenadine as he positively beamed at her. “Okay. Several things. You’re _already_ a real girlfriend, Marinette.”

She stuck out her bottom lip in a pout to rival Adrien’s.

“You _are_,” he stressed, taking her hand in his. “We’re dating, aren’t we?”

“Yeah,” she grumbled. “But I just don’t feel like—It’s not like in the movies or on TV. I feel like I’m not doing it right.”

Luka paused for a minute. “Marinette…real relationships rarely play out like in fiction. I know you have no way of knowing this because you don’t have much relationship experience yourself, but…we’re never going to be like a rom com couple. Maybe we need to talk about expectations. All you can be is you, and all I can be is me.”

She bit her lip. “Do you think that just being me will be enough?”

“Remember two hours ago when I told you that you were epic?” Luka answered tenderly, reaching to move a bang out of her face.

A tentative smile began to bloom on her lips. “Yeah. Sorry. I’ve just…completely lost faith in myself this year when it comes to romance. …What were you saying? You were saying something about blue being my colour.”

He gave the side of her forehead a gentle kiss. “Next, I was going to say that I don’t know if I have a ‘macho, possessive nature’, but I’d love to see you in blue, and I appreciate the sentiment behind the gesture.”

Marinette hummed thoughtfully, considering her next move for a minute before casually inquiring, “And…is there anything else you’d like to see me in? Maybe…I don’t know…something Viperion-inspired?”

Luka gulped, mind immediately ending up in the gutter. “Is this a serious question?”

She nodded, smiling at his flustered state. “Yeah. I take requests. What would you like to see me wear?”

His mind went blank. “Uh…You don’t…happen to have anything Chat Noir-inspired, do you?”

Marinette blinked. “Really?”

“Is that weird? Sorry,” Luka rushed to apologize, looking away as his cheeks did a tomato impression. “Pretend I didn’t say anything.”

“No, it’s fine,” she assured, regaining her presence of mind. “I actually have a dress and some accessories I’ve made, but…I’m a little worried it would give Adrien the wrong idea. I don’t want to lead him on—provided he still even has feelings for me after everything anyway.” She looked away with a sigh.

“Right,” Luka hissed softly. “Right. Sorry. I…I guess I wasn’t thinking.”

Marinette glanced up and studied her boyfriend curiously. “Why Chat Noir exactly?”

Luka tensed. “Um…I mean…I like the aesthetic. Lady Noire was hot, so…” He trailed off, hoping she’d accept the explanation and not dig any deeper into his Marinette-Adrien-threesome fantasies. He knew they all had feelings for one another to some degree, but none of the relationships were really stable. None of them were really healthy. There was still a lot of hurt between Marinette and Adrien, and Luka was afraid that if he asked for what he really wanted, the whole thing would topple down on top of him like a house of cards.

“Another thing,” Luka changed the topic, meeting Marinette’s eye. “A minute ago you said that fashion was the only thing you had going for you, but you know that’s not really true, don’t you? Is that just your bruised self-confidence talking? Do I need to shower you with compliments to bolster your self-esteem?”

Marinette giggled, leaning back into him and giving him a kiss on the cheek. “God, you’re so sweet, Luka. That won’t be necessary, but thank you.”

“You just tell me when you need me to, and I will always be there to build you up, Chanson,” he promised, treasuring this moment, the warmth of her in his arms.

They sat there in silence for a bit, recuperating until Marinette nuzzled the underside of Luka’s jaw and whispered, “…I want to go stargazing. Can we go abovedeck for just a little while?”

“Sure, but it’s cold. It’s November, and it’s windy out on the water,” he warned.

“We can wrap up in a blanket and snuggle in one of the deck chairs,” Marinette suggested. “Just for a bit.”

Luka raised an eyebrow, inclining his head to look down at her. “How are we both going to fit in a single deck chair? They’re not that big.”

Marinette shrugged, cheerily proposing, “I can sit on your lap.”

Luka gulped but nodded. He wasn’t sure if she was acting so affectionate because it made _her_ feel better after a rough day or if she was attempting to make _him_ feel cared for, but Luka was starting to think that he was going to overdose on all of this physical contact.

They headed up to the deck of the Liberty and settled down in one of the deck chairs with Marinette in Luka’s lap and the blanket wrapped around them to fight off the chill of the night. She rested her head against his shoulder, and he held her tightly to him.

“I wish I knew the names of the stars,” Marinette mumbled. “You can’t see a lot of them in the middle of Paris, can you?”

“No,” Luka sighed. “You can’t…and tonight’s kind of overcast.”

“Oh well.” Marinette shrugged. “The ones we can see are pretty…. Those three look like they form a triangle. You see the really bright ones?”

“I know one of those is Vega,” Luka offered. “Not sure which one. The others are Altair and Deneb…. I’m more familiar with the summer sky, honestly. This, I look up and…I’m lost.”

“Why do you know about the summer sky?” Marinette inquired innocently.

“The person I told you about that I dated two years ago,” Luka replied in what he’d intended to be a neutral tone. It came out more wistful than anything.

“Oh?” Marinette was incredibly curious about this mystery girl who had decimated Luka so completely, but she was afraid to ask lest she step on sore feelings. Whenever he volunteered information, her ears always perked up.

“We dated from the end of March to the middle of August. When it was warm, we’d come lie out on the deck at night and look at the stars. They liked stars…used to point out the constellations and tell me the stories behind them…. Maybe next summer we can go stargazing. …Maybe invite Adrien sometimes. He likes stars. Maybe invite the others too, have a watch party,” Luka proposed, trying not to show blatant favoritism and failing.

“I’d like that,” Marinette whispered.

They were silent for a long while, just enjoying their collective warmth against the bitter wind and watching as wispy clouds moved across the sky.

Marinette took a steadying breath. “…I like being with you.”

Her words took Luka by surprise, and it was a moment before he could find the words to respond. “I like being with you too, Third.”

“I like you,” Marinette continued. “I _do_ like you…. You believe that, don’t you?”

He nodded. “I know you like me.”

“I just don’t…” She stopped. “I think I’m broken. I don’t seem to be able to love like other people do. Like how you and Adrien love me,” she explained. “I don’t know if it’s just because I’m not as emotionally mature yet or something, but…I’m trying to be in love. I know what I feel is some version of love, but…I’ve thought I was in love before, and it turned out that what I thought was love wasn’t anything close to really loving someone. I thought what I felt was a big deal, but… My ‘love’ wasn’t as good as Adrien’s, and now…the love I feel for you is really cheap and small compared to your love for me. I don’t know if I can love big like other people.”

“Marinette, your love is plenty good enough,” Luka insisted, beginning to understand the storm raging inside her head a little better now.

She pushed back to look him in the eye. “No, it’s not. You’re not satisfied with it. Adrien wasn’t either. I appreciate you trying to make me feel better, but please don’t lie to me. I can tell that my feelings are inferior.”

Luka held her gaze for a long beat. “…I think…‘inferior’ is the wrong word…. ‘Different’. You’re eighteen, Marinette. It’s not normal for eighteen-year-olds to be mentally and emotionally competent about life and love and all that. You have time to grow and figure things out. You _will_ grow and figure things out. Experience is going to polish you and make you glow. It’s okay to not be there yet.”

Marinette breathed a heavy sigh and melted back into his arms, squeezing him tightly.

“The truth is,” Luka continued softly, “you have a tremendous amount of love in your heart, Chanson. I can hear it, and the melody is _exquisite_. I can’t wait to see you grow and mature, hear how gorgeous your song becomes. Just give it time. Patience, Third. I’m so sorry if it ever felt like I was rushing you. I never meant to make you feel not good enough.”

She pulled back again, carefully cupping his cheek, staring intently into his eyes. “It always amazes me how much faith you have in me. It’s intimidating…but it feels really good too. It makes me happy that you don’t think I’m hopeless. …But what I want, Luka, is for us to get to a point where I’m not the only one constantly taking and taking from you. You’re always reassuring me and comforting me. I don’t feel like we’re on an even footing. I want to feel like I’m your partner…. I want to be able to comfort you too.”

“You do,” Luka breathed, pulse quickening as she leaned in close. “We’ll get there, Chanson.”

She closed the distance, placing a sweet, tentative kiss to his lips.

He responded gently, setting a slow pace. A series of feather-light brushes.

There was so much pain and uncertainty in it. Wanting more: more passion, more feeling, more authenticity on both sides.

Marinette’s brain wouldn’t shut off. She couldn’t stop wondering why she couldn’t just kiss the boy. Why was everything such a big deal and simultaneously not good enough, not enough. She _liked _him. _Didn’t_ she like him? Or did she just like how he made her feel? Was she screwing things up with Luka just like she’d screwed up with Adrien?

And then she was thinking of Adrien. Adrien kissing that girl in the library for acting class. Or at least pretending to kiss her. Kissing Chat Noir on her balcony, sinking her teeth into his neck as he squirmed and gasped. His body against hers. _Adrien_.

_LUKA_.

She attempted to recalibrate her thoughts.

Luka hurt at her thinking of other boys while kissing him.

She panicked, gave up, pulled back. “Sorry,” she gasped, lips barely clear of his. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have—”

She looked down at the confused expression on his face.

“Sorry,” she repeated.

Luka blinked several times slowly, swallowed, and nodded, seeming to accept that the kiss was suddenly over. “It’s…okay. You’re fine.”

She avoided his curious gaze by resting her head back on his shoulder.

He didn’t say anything, but he gave her a reassuring squeeze and kiss on the top of the head.

He began to wonder if this was really better than when she used to turn and give him her cheek when he tried to kiss her. He felt like her yoyo. He wondered if it were better to be kissed in this unfulfilling, emotional whiplash sort of way or if it would be better not to be kissed at all.

Ten minutes later, Luka broke the silence. “You’re not getting cold, are you?”

“No,” she replied sleepily. “You’re keeping me warm.”

“You falling asleep?” he chuckled.

“No,” she yawned.

He nuzzled her hair affectionately. “Yes you are. Come on, Chanson. Time to get you home. Do you want me to give you a ride on the motorcycle or we can ride the Métro? I can escort you in a cab?”

Marinette pushed back to meet his eyes. “I’d kind of like to stay here…. If that’s all right?”

“You want…to stay the night?” he confirmed, sure that his ears were playing mean, nasty tricks on him.

She nodded. “Can I?”

Luka’s brain was fried. She wanted…? _Did_ she want…? Did _he_ want? Okay, but even if they both did, was that even a good idea? That was the only question he had a definite answer to, and the answer was a resounding, emphatic NO. They couldn’t even kiss without it being stressful and complicated.

Luka shut his eyes and took a deep breath. “Marinette, we’re not having sex. Like, _anytime_ soon.”

“Okay,” she replied in a small voice.

He looked at her pleadingly. “I can’t do this right now, okay?”

She nodded. “Okay. What about just snuggling? I don’t want to go home and be alone with my thoughts. I want to stay with you.”

He considered the proposal for a hard minute, his head reasoning that this was a horrible idea while his heart whispered that he wanted her with him too.

“Okay,” he finally decided. If he could resist Adrien, he should be able to resist Marinette as well, right? Except…Adrien wasn’t the least bit interested in getting Luka’s clothes off.

Marinette smiled shyly, causing Luka’s heart to melt. “Okay. Ready for bed?”

Luka nodded, unable to find his voice.

She came out of his bathroom with her hair down, wearing boyshorts-type underwear and the undershirt she’d been wearing beneath her puffy, electric blue sweater. She wasn’t wearing a bra.

Luka could easily tell at a glance that she wasn’t wearing a bra. The hard part was not outright staring. It had been a long time since he’d last seen breasts.

Internally, Luka cursed and tried to pretend that she was just wearing a swimming suit. Unfortunately, the mental image of Marinette in a swimming suit did similar things to him as Marinette in her underwear.

“Why are there two toothbrushes in your bathroom?” Marinette inquired out of curiosity. “I thought you were the only one who used this one.”

Luka’s brain broke for a different reason. “Uh…” In his muddled state, Luka decided to go for the truth. “Sometimes Adrien ends up here in the middle of the night if he gets upset or something. It’s easier to just keep a toothbrush and a change of clothes here. I’ve been led to believe that he has a similar setup at Nino’s and Chloé’s.”

Marinette nodded slowly.

Luka was expecting a teasing comment such as, “Wow. He really _is_ your boyfriend, isn’t he?” but instead she remarked in an almost sad, nostalgic way, “Yeah. Chat Noir has a toothbrush at my house too—at least he did. Before, I mean. I mean, I still have it…not that he’s coming back.” She looked down at the floor, rubbing at her arm. “He slept on my balcony and my chaise from time to time. He spent the night a lot for a couple months about two years ago. Sometimes I’d wake up in the middle of the night and see him down on my chaise longue, but then I’d wake up in the morning and he’d be gone. Is that what he does to you?”

Luka shook his head, watching as she made her way over to the bed and slipped under the covers, taking the side by the wall.

“He typically stays the whole night with me and helps Rose make breakfast in the morning. I guess it’s easier now that his father is more lenient and there aren’t any secret identities to worry about protecting,” Luka reasoned as he turned off the light.

He hesitated before pulling back the covers and climbing into bed beside her.

She smiled shyly at him.

This felt, oddly, like a betrayal. He comforted himself with the fact that Adrien would never know. At least Marinette wasn’t sleeping on Adrien’s side of the bed. That would have just felt wrong.

It was bad enough that Luka was probably going to wake up calling Marinette “Angel” or “Ariel” and feel bad for betraying both Marinette and Adrien simultaneously. And then Adrien would probably find out somehow and be inconsolably hurt, and…

Luka forcibly turned off the downward mental spiral and directed his attention to the present moment where he was in bed with his girlfriend, about to spend the night cuddling.

Everything would be fine.

…Marinette was probably a cover thief.

“Night, Luka,” she whispered, settling in with her head resting against his shoulder.

He gave her forehead a grounding kiss. “Good night, Third. Sweet dreams.”

[“Why are you going Eltz?”](https://mikauzoran.tumblr.com/post/188950772725/hi-guys-since-my-car-broke-instead-of-doing-the) Adrien asked Rose, his back to her as he mixed together the ingredients for the blueberry lemon poppyseed scones with his hands like Tom had shown him, forming the dough into a ball before taking it from the bowl and rolling it out on the counter.

“I have accepted an engagement there for the winter. It is time for me to go,” Rose, who was sitting at the counter on one of the brightly coloured stools, read from a photocopy of [the script](https://www.gutenberg.org/files/1754/1754-h/1754-h.htm).

Marinette paused in the doorway between the hallway and the main cabin. Rose had been living with the Couffaines off and on for years, so Marinette wasn’t really surprised to see her, but what was Adrien doing in the Couffaines’ kitchen at eight AM on a Thursday morning, and what were he and Rose talking about?

Adrien began to cut circles out of the scone dough using the rim of a cup and placed the resulting dough globs onto a baking tray, carefully equidistant from the sides of the tray and the other nascent scones.

“Nina,” Adrien replied bitterly, further confusing Marinette for a moment before she realized what was going on. “I have cursed you and hated you and torn up your photograph…” Suddenly Adrien’s voice became resigned with a hint of tenderness as he continued, “…and yet…I have known _every minute_ of my life that my heart and soul were yours forever.”

Marinette’s heart stopped beating and then fluttered. She felt dizzy, overwhelmed, and oh so torn at Adrien Agreste’s vows of eternal love. He was a good actor, yes, but the feelings he was expressing had to come from somewhere, and she had a feeling that Adrien was very much drawing on his own feelings for _her_.

“To cease from loving you is beyond my power,” Adrien chuckled softly, sadly. “I have suffered continually from the time I lost you and began to write, and my life has been almost unendurable,” Adrien confessed, and Marinette believed him.

She had felt the same way. She’d lost her partner and friend Chat Noir just when they were beginning to be something more. She had lost her sweet Adrien, her love and her close confident. She’d ruined everything, and they’d been yanked away from her, out of her life, and it had been continual suffering ever since then trying to repair the damage.

“My youth was suddenly plucked from me then, and I seem now to have lived in this world for ninety years. I have called out to you,” Adrien lamented. “I have kissed the ground you walked on, wherever I looked I have seen your face before my eyes, and the smile that had illumined for me the best years of my life.”

“Why, why does he talk to me like this?” Rose read in response, following the flow of the dialogue down the page with her finger, making sure Adrien had the lines right.

“I am quite alone,” Adrien whispered, an aching to his voice that broke Marinette’s heart because she could feel the loneliness behind those words, _Adrien’s_ loneliness, the loneliness of years of enforced solitude with no one to comfort him, no one to rely on.

“…unwarmed by any attachment,” he continued. “I am as cold as if I were living in a cave…. Uh…” He paused and then muttered to himself, repeating without feeling, “I am as cold as if I were living in a cave…. Shoot,” he sighed. “Sorry. Line?”

“‘Whatever I write is’,” Rose prompted.

Suddenly Adrien was back in character, mournful, “Whatever I write is dry and gloomy and harsh…. Stay here, Nina,” he begged, and those words had all the broken desperation of when Adrien had looked at Marinette that spring on that park bench in the Tuileries and pleaded with her, “Please don’t leave me”.

Marinette’s heart lurched.

“…I beseech you, or else let me go away with you.”

“Nina quickly puts on her coat and hat,” Rose read the stage directions between Adrien’s lines.

“Nina, why do you do that?” Adrien despaired. “For God’s sake, Nina!”

Marinette let out a little gasp as she realized that Nina was leaving Adrien just like _Marinette_ had left Adrien, and Adrien wouldn’t survive that kind of devastation again. It was bad enough that Marinette had hurt Adrien both as herself and as Ladybug. Nina couldn’t rip his heart out and stomp on it too. Adrien deserved better. Someone needed to stop Nina. Someone needed to protect Adrien…but Marinette was powerless to help. She was even more guilty than Nina. All she could do was watch and listen.

They talked. Nina’s coach was waiting at the gate. She didn’t want Adrien to see her out. She was leaving. She talked a bunch of nonsense, and Marinette got the impression that Nina was half mad. She seemed to be under the impression that she was a seagull that Adrien had shot two years prior? Marinette really wondered what Adrien saw in this Nina. Marinette really wondered what Adrien saw in _Marinette_.

Nina seemed to have a plan, though. She was an actress. She was going to be a _great_ actress…if she didn’t end up in an insane asylum first.

“You have found your way,” Adrien sighed sadly. “you know where you are going, but I am still groping in a chaos of phantoms and dreams, not knowing whom and what end I am serving by it all…. I do not believe in anything, and I do not know what my calling is,” he replied, a deep weariness to his voice.

Adrien sounded so lost.

Marinette wanted to grab his hand and lead him through the chaos, out of the darkness and the loneliness, but she couldn’t. She knew she was powerless. No Lucky Charm would solve the problems between them and bridge the gulf.

“Nina embraces you impetuously and runs out onto the terrace,” Rose announced.

Adrien placed the scones into the oven, set the timer, and then stood there for a moment, looking numb. “It would be a pity if she were seen in the garden. My mother would be distressed.”

There was a pause that had Marinette leaning forward, on the edge of her figurative seat. Surely, Adrien would go after her despite her insistence that he not. Surely, they would be reconciled. Surely, there would be a happy ending for Adrien this time.

Adrien cleared his throat. “And then I slowly tear up all of my manuscripts, unlock the door, go out, and shoot myself. End scene.”

“What?!” Marinette screeched, making Adrien, Rose, and Luka (who had been standing behind her for God knows how long, watching her go to pieces over Adrien) all jump.

“No!” Marinette insisted. “It can’t end like that! You have to go after her! You can’t just shoot yourself! What the hell kind of play is this?!”

Luka placed a steadying hand on her shoulder. “Deep breaths, Chanson. It’s The Seagull by Anton Chekhov.” Luka looked up at Adrien. “_Beautiful_ job.”

Adrien’s face lit up with a smile and a blush, and he moved to run a hand through his hair, stopping when he remembered the blueberry lemon poppyseed dough still sticking to his hands. “Thank you. I’m glad you think I did it justice. I know it’s your favourite Chekhov play.” He turned to look at Marinette shamefacedly. “Sorry it upset you.”

Marinette rounded on her boyfriend. “You _like_ this?”

Luka shrugged. “It’s better if you see the whole thing. It’s really powerful if done well.”

Adrien winced. “Sorry for spoiling the ending.”

Marinette took a calming breath. “I think I need to stick to plays with happy endings. My life is angsty enough. I need fluff.”

“_I’m_ doing a scene from Shakespeare’s As You Like It,” Rose informed with a sly grin. “It’s a gender-bender rom com. Much more digestible than Chekhov. Want us to do my scene to cheer you up?”

Marinette tried to smile, but it came out as more of a grimace. “Thank you so much, Rose, but Shakespeare is too smart for me this early in the morning. I actually just came in to see if you needed help with breakfast. I feel guilty eating if I don’t help cook,” she explained, coming over to lean on the counter next to Rose.

“We hadn’t really started breakfast yet,” Adrien laughed sheepishly, bringing the dishes he had used making the scones over to the sink and beginning to wash them. “The blueberry lemon poppyseed scones are technically for Luka, but he’ll probably share. We were thinking omelets, toast and jam, yogurt, fruit, and bacon for everyone else. We were just about to start.”

“You made him blueberry lemon poppyseed scones?” Marinette chuckled, mentally doing the math on how many scones Luka would have with Adrien’s batch now on top of the batch she had brought Luka the night before. “That’s really sweet of you. What’s the occasion?”

Adrien shrugged, demurring, casting his eyes down into the sink. “No occasion. Just…I know they’re his favourite, and your dad has been teaching me, so… I guess they’re a thank you gift for him always putting up with my crap twenty-four-seven.”

Marinette nodded, turning to smile at Luka who was standing back slightly, looking nervous. “I might have to steal your idea, Adrien; he puts up with _my_ crap twenty-four-seven too.”

“Yeah,” Adrien chuckled, smiling besottedly down at the bowl he was cleaning. “He’s just awesome like that, isn’t he?”

“Yeah,” Marinette laughed fondly, not catching the lovesick expression on Adrien’s face.

Luka’s throat tightened. His nerves were on edge. He couldn’t even enjoy the flattery of the two objects of his affections because any second now Adrien was going to realize that Marinette had come from _Luka’s bedroom_, and there were going to be all kinds of misunderstandings, and Adrien was going to be _hurt_.

Rose’s eyes narrowed as she started to pick up on the fact that something was off. She looked back and forth between Luka and Marinette. Her gaze landed on the latter as she asked, “Marinette, when did you get here?”

Adrien looked up and frowned. “Yeah, I didn’t see you come in. I guess we were really caught up in running lines.”

Luka tensed, bracing for the explosion.

Marinette shrugged, cheeks beginning to turn rose petal pink. “I’ve _been_ here.”

Rose’s head slowly tipped to the side. “But…we’ve been going over our scenes for almost an hour now. How _early_ did you get here?”

Marinette bit her lip, squirming slightly as her blush deepened. She smiled shyly. “Last night?”

Adrien stopped breathing. His eyes went glassy. He stared unseeingly at Marinette, blinked, and then looked at Luka.

There he found guilt and apologies being silently screamed at him.

He looked away, back down into the sink. He tried to make his mind focus on the dishes, but he couldn’t help but think about how he’d been feeling down the previous evening and Luka hadn’t been available because he’d had “company”. Adrien had assumed that that meant some bandmates or friends from the Literature Department at university.

Had Luka and Marinette been in bed together when Luka had called? Is that why they’d enlisted Nino to babysit Adrien through his bad mood? So that he wouldn’t bother them while they…

He felt like such an idiot. He’d been excited about the dinner/concert date with Luka on Saturday. He’d been looking forward to Tuesday night dinner/movie/snuggling with Marinette and Luka, but…in reality, Adrien was grasping at clouds…the scraps of other people’s happiness that were occasionally thrown his way. Fragments of affection, shadows. It was all pointless, last-ditch efforts to make himself feel like he wasn’t being left behind.

He _was_ being left behind. Luka didn’t need Adrien to make him feel better about the situation with Marinette now. Luka didn’t need him anymore now that things were going well with his girlfriend, so Luka was going to cut Adrien off so as not to endanger things with Marinette.

Echoes of something Gabriel had said to Adrien two years prior reverberated through Adrien’s head: why would Luka choose Adrien when Luka could have a happy, normal relationship with a girl? Was this what Gabriel had been afraid of? Adrien getting hurt like _this_? Adrien had thought Gabriel was just throwing anything and everything at the wall to see what stuck in a desperate attempt to separate Adrien from Luka, but…it seemed like Gabriel had hit on something real whether he’d intended to or not.

Adrien felt like he’d been wounded. It was a lot like the time he’d been impaled. There was pain and cold and numbness and terror and the panicked thought, “Oh, God. There’s a javelin sticking out of my chest. What do I even _do_?!”

Adrien couldn’t breathe. He was losing them both.

Vaguely, Adrien registered Rose saying something. It was a fast, high-pitched stream of words directed at Marinette, and then Rose was tugging Marinette back down the hallway, out of the main cabin, perhaps towards Rose’s room for an interrogation.

And that left Adrien alone with Luka, and Adrien was going to have to say something. Adrien was going to have to produce words and sentences in either French, English, or Russian and pretend like his world wasn’t falling apart freaking _again_. He had to handle this gracefully and not freak out and not behave like a lunatic like he had last time when Marinette had broken his heart. He had to keep it together long enough to make breakfast and sit through the meal, watching Marinette and Luka make morning after eyes at one another. He had to stay calm and collected long enough to get home where it would be safe to have a total meltdown.

For the time being, Adrien reached out with his mind for the kwami hiding in his right shoulder. He drew on Nooroo’s power, searching for some hint of calm or joy or tranquility or contentment out there beyond himself that he could make his own for the next hour or two. _Someone_ in Paris had to be having a good day. There had to be one person at least from whom Adrien could borrow some small part of positive feelings to get him through this.

The first thing he felt was Luka, all guilt and panic and not what Adrien needed for once. He spread his search out farther, beyond the ship.

“Adrien,” Luka called, breaking Adrien’s concentration.

Adrien slammed the fire-doors of his emotions shut, putting on an empty smile that he had no doubt Luka could see through. “Good morning, Orpheus. It looks like I owe you a congratulations. I’m happy to see that things between you and Marinette are finally progressing. That’s good.” Adrien dropped his gaze to his hands and sadly added something that was actually true, “I mean, you deserve to be happy and have good things happen.”

“Adrien, this is all a misunderstanding,” Luka began, striding across the cabin and around into the kitchen.

Adrien let out a feral feline hiss and turned to glare as Luka approached. “Don’t even start with me. Look, it’s fine. Whatever. She’s your girlfriend. It’s completely normal for you to be sleeping with her. You don’t have to lie to me about it.”

“Adrien, I’m not,” Luka swore as he advanced.

Adrien backed away, growling softly. “Leave me alone.”

“I’m not sleeping with her,” Luka explained, reaching out to take Adrien by the arms.

Adrien backed up into the counter and gritted his teeth. “Don’t touch me.”

Luka grabbed a towel off the counter and caught one of Adrien’s hands, carefully rubbing it dry before taking the other one and doing the same. “I know you’re upset, but there’s no reason to be. Nothing happened. I promise you, Third.” Luka looked up and met Adrien’s gaze. He was surprised to find Adrien staring back at him with a mixed expression of hurt and sadness and betrayal on his face.

“‘Third’?” Adrien whispered. “Is that a new nickname for me…or is that what you call her?”

Luka looked away and cursed. When he turned back, he wore a pleading expression. “Adrien, I am so sorry. I’m not running on much sleep.”

Adrien let out an angry bark of laughter, ripping his arm out of Luka’s grasp. “Oh? Please, rub it in a little more!”

“Adrien.” Luka reached for him, but Adrien dodged. “That’s not what I meant. Please just listen to me.”

“I’m going home,” Adrien announced, sidestepping Luka and making to escape. “Don’t forget to take the scones out of the oven when the timer goes off. It’s not my fault if you don’t and the whole boat burns down. Tell the others…” He thought for a minute, pausing by the end of the counter. “…Tell them I died. Or, better yet, tell them the truth.”

Luka caught him around the waist and pulled Adrien back against him, holding him firm. “Please just listen,” he begged against the shell of Adrien’s ear.

Adrien stopped struggling and slumped back against Luka.

“Adrien, we didn’t have sex. We spent the evening snuggling. Yes, she spent the night in my bed, but that was the first time that had ever happened, and _nothing_ happened between us. It was no different than when _you_ spend the night.”

Adrien stiffened at that. “Did she sleep on my side of the bed?”

Luka shook his head despite Adrien being unable to see him. “Adrien, no. She slept on the wall side of the bed. P5, I’m not replacing you. There’s nothing to be upset about; she’s not taking anything that’s yours.”

Slowly, Adrien turned in Luka’s arms to meet Luka’s plaintive gaze. “You smell like her,” he accused without heat.

“I don’t suppose you have any of that Adrien the Perfume on you, do you?” Luka sighed. “I mean, if you did, we could douse me in that, and I’d smell like you.”

Adrien gave a snort of laughter at that, beginning to thaw. “No, but I do have some Camembert. We could always smear you with that.”

Luka chuckled, resting his forehead against Adrien’s. “I will do literally _anything_ you say you need me to do to make things okay between us.”

Adrien bit his lip. “You didn’t sleep with her?”

“No,” Luka confirmed.

Adrien hummed softly in thought. “Did you two make out?”

Luka frowned, weighing his answer carefully before giving it. “Yes and no. We kissed, but…she’s not really into it. I mean, she _tries _to be, but…the only time that she _was_ was when she was imagining she was kissing _you_.”

Adrien arched an eyebrow skeptically. “How can you tell?”

“She moaned ‘Minou’,” Luka sighed.

Adrien winced. “Oh. That’s me all right. Geez.”

Luka snorted. “Yeah.”

There was a beat, and Adrien’s arms wrapped around Luka, pulling him in tighter. “You okay?”

“Not really,” Luka mumbled with a tired shrug. “_You_ okay?”

Adrien shook his head. “No. I’m kind of realizing how delusional I’ve been.”

Little furrows began to form in Luka’s brow. “Oh?”

Adrien nodded. “This whole time, I’ve been waiting and trying to coax you away, but you’re never going to leave Marinette for me, are you?”

Luka’s eyes flew open in surprise, and his lips parted to answer, but he was cut off by Anarka calling out in a much-too-loud voice, “Marinette! It’s so good to see you! I didn’t know you were here!” as she stood in the doorway between the hallway and the main cabin, blocking the way and the sightlines.

Adrien and Luka jumped apart and tried not to look guilty as Anarka looked back over her shoulder, observed that her son was no longer in a compromising position, and stepped out of the way, letting Rose, Juleka, and Marinette pass.

“Will you be staying for breakfast, Dear?” Anarka put on a big, friendly smile that belied her throbbing headache.

“If that’s okay?” Marinette bit her lip nervously. “I wouldn’t want to intrude, Capitaine.”

“Oh, no. Of course it’s okay!” Anarka assured. “The more the merrier, right, Luka? Adrien?”

The boys stammered out a slightly out of sync affirmative.

“Marinette, why don’t you help me prep the vegetables for the omelets?” Rose proposed, taking Marinette by the hand and gently tugging her over to the kitchen. “Adrien, can you start washing and cutting up fruit?”

“Sure thing,” Adrien assured, jumping into action (but not before nonchalantly letting his hand brush against Luka’s).

Luka countered with an affectionate smile, and Adrien responded with a subtle wink.

“Are we sure we trust butterfingers with a knife?” Juleka snorted sassily, sticking out her tongue at Adrien.

He answered in kind.

“Oh, you mean Adrien?” Marinette laughed heartily. “Gosh, Juleka. I thought you meant _me_ for a second there.”

“O-Oh.” Juleka gave a start. “No. Sorry.”

“I’ve been known to cut myself a few times,” Adrien explained, coming up beside Marinette and giving her a little bump with his shoulder.

Marinette laughed and gave him a bump in return. “I don’t know if I want to share kitchen space with you. It sounds like you’re notorious with a blade in your hand wherever you go.”

She leaned into him, and he leaned back, both of them laughing as they halfheartedly tried to knock the other over.

Luka grinned fondly as he watched them horse around…until Juleka came up beside him and slapped his arm playfully, giving him a knowing eyebrow waggle.

He rolled his eyes at her and turned his attention to Rose. “Rosette, what do you need me to do?”

“I need you and Juju out of the kitchen,” she informed. “There’s not enough space for more than three, so the honorary Couffaines will be making breakfast. Couffaines by birth can go look pretty elsewhere.”

Luka snickered as he followed Juleka around to the other side of the counter, out of the way. “I’m sure Juleka will manage just fine, but I prefer to leave the looking pretty to Adrien and Marinette.”

Adrien gave a snort of laughter and lost the power struggle with Marinette, stumbling slightly as she knocked him off balance. In an instant, her hand shot out, grabbing his arm and steadying her partner.

Adrien chuckled sheepishly. “Thanks, Buginette.”

Marinette winked. “No worries, Chaton. I’ve got your back…even when you’re distracted by my smokin’ hot boyfriend.”

Luka choked on air, face taking on the hue of a firetruck.

“Oh, you noticed?” Adrien purred.

“What? The way you look like you want to sink your claws into him?” she joked.

“More than just my claws,” Adrien hummed, going over to the refrigerator to get out the mushrooms, peppers, broccoli, and onions for the omelets for the girls as well as the fruit to prep himself. “Would you be angry if I sank my teeth into him, or do only _you_ get to do that?”

Marinette took the onion and carton of mushrooms from Adrien as he passed them to her. “Depends. Do I get to watch?”

Juleka put a hand over her mouth to stifle her laughter while she nudged her brother with her other arm. “Are they flirting with you or each other?”

“Guys,” Luka hissed, voice pained. “I am right here.”

Before either Marinette or Adrien could answer, Anarka spoke up. “Yes, and I actually need you abovedeck to help me with the sound system real quick. Can I borrow you for ten minutes, Luc?”

Luka quickly analyzed the situation between Marinette and Adrien and determined the atmosphere to be stable for now. They could be left alone together under Juleka and Rose’s supervision for ten minutes.

“Sure thing, Maman,” he easily agreed, not suspecting that Anarka’s excuse was only that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually did a recording of the Seagull scene, if you'd be interesting in listening. It's here on my Tumblr: https://mikauzoran.tumblr.com/post/188950772725/hi-guys-since-my-car-broke-instead-of-doing-the
> 
> So what do we think? Did we enjoy the Lukanette? Should I do more Lukanette in the future? Maybe some fluffier Lukanette?
> 
> Going into this, I didn't have a scene for Adrien and Rose to be practicing picked out. I was wracking my brain for a good fit when something reminded me of The Seagull, and I thought, "Yeah! I'll do a scene from that!" I was skimming through the play, refreshing my memory (it's been about two years since I last saw it), and I came to the end and thought, "Actually, this is perfect. I have to use this". It was all rather serendipitous. I hope you liked that scene. I know it was kind of introspective on Marinette's part, but I'm happy with how it turned out.
> 
> Did you have a favourite line? A favourite scene? A favourite pairing from this chapter?
> 
> Well, the Anarka and Luka chapter is next. I should have that up on Thursday, 11/21/2019. Thanks for reading!
> 
> References:  
The Seagull (Text): https://www.gutenberg.org/files/1754/1754-h/1754-h.htm  
The Seagull (Wikipedia): https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Seagull


	20. Parental Guidance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anarka and Luka have a talk about the Adrien and Marinette situation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone. Thanks for tuning in. And thank you so much for all of your wonderful comments on last chapter, and thank you as well to everyone who left kudos or bookmarked the story. I am always grateful for your support. Today's chapter was written in response to Buggy's request about wanting to see what Anarka thought of the situation between Luka, Marinette, and Adrien. I hope you enjoy it. ^.^
> 
> This is a direct continuation of the previous two chapters, and it takes place during Jabberwocky/Daisy on a Thursday morning in November when Marinette and Adrien are eighteen and a half and Luka is twenty-one.

“So what’s up with the sound system?” Luka inquired as he and Anarka reached the deck of the Liberty.

“Nothing,” Anarka sighed, running a hand through her bangs as she motioned with a tip of her head for him to follow her over to the sofa under the covered area. “That was just an excuse to get you up here so I could talk to you.”

Luka stopped, hanging back in the entryway. “About…what?” he inquired cautiously, suddenly on his guard.

Anarka took a seat and shook her head, patting the spot on the sofa next to her. The sag of her shoulders and the downward turn of her mouth made her look weary. “Luc, you know I make a policy of staying the hell out of you and your sister’s lives unless I see you struggling or screwing up…. Honey, lately you’ve been screwing up.”

Luka tensed, the hair on his arms standing straight up. “Okay,” he scoffed, “but before you say a word about Adrien and Marinette, answer me this: Do you even know who my father is? I kind of get the feeling that he isn’t the guy you were living with at the time, so I’m not sure you have any right to call me out on this one.”

Anarka gave her son an unamused look, shook her head, and sighed. “I mean, I’ve got a list of contenders if you want to go ask for paternity tests.”

Luka shrank, the surge of defensiveness he’d felt at first abruptly petering out. His gaze dropped to the deck. “I’m so sorry, Mom. That was completely out of line.” He slunk over to the sofa and sank down beside her, elbows on his knees, head in his hands. “I may be incredibly sensitive about the Marinette and Adrien issue.”

“Luc,” Anarka called gently, reaching out to rest a comforting hand between his shoulder blades. “Honey, I didn’t call you up here to harp or condemn. I have to admit I feel bad for Marinette…and Adrien too…but I’m not in the business of pointing fingers.”

“Then what are we here to talk about?” Luka mumbled, lowering one of his hands from his face to glance sideways at his mother.

“The way you’re going about this,” Anarka answered. “Clearly you’ve never done this before because you suck at it. Luka, the first rule of double dealing is ‘Don’t get caught’. If I hadn’t been standing in that hallway just a bit ago, Marinette would have walked in on you and Adrien with your arms around each other, pressed together from thigh to chest, and I don’t think you could have explained that away.”

Luka winced. “How long were you hanging out in the hallway?”

Anarka gave an indignant snort. “It’s my hallway. I’ll loiter in it just as long as I please.”

Luka deflated.

“I saw Rose pull Marinette into Juleka’s room as I was heading towards the kitchen for some coffee. I imagine I caught most of your fight with Adrien,” Anarka confessed.

Luka shrank further with a little groan.

“You need to be more careful,” Anarka advised, “especially when they’re both around. You can’t get distracted. You have to be mindful of where they are and what they can see and hear. It sounds like this morning was a total cluster with Adrien ‘walking in on’, in a way, you spending the night with Marinette and Marinette almost catching you smoothing Adrien’s ruffled feathers. You’re playing a tricky game, Luka, and if you’re going to do this, you need to be more vigilant.”

Luka groaned again. “I can’t believe we’re having this conversation. I mean, it sounds so calculated and-and, frankly, _bad_ when you talk about it like that.” Realization dawned upon him. “I guess because it _is_ bad. …I am officially on the same level as a fungus.”

“You’re _not_,” Anarka stressed, moving her hand up to his shoulder to give it a bolstering squeeze.

“I am a cheating pig,” Luka lamented miserably.

“Stoooop,” Anarka sighed heavily. “We’re not here to morally evaluate and pass judgment on your actions. We’re here to help you cheat better.”

Luka looked up at his mother, vexed. “I feel like, I’d rather you berate me and point fingers. What I’m doing is not okay. Stop condoning this.”

Anarka threw up her hands. “You only think what you’re doing isn’t okay because someone has put ideas about monogamy and ‘the institution of marriage’ into your head. Who taught you this? Because it certainly wasn’t me.”

Luka snorted. “I blame TV and movies.”

Anarka gave a sharp nod. “You know, I heard that some places people practice consecutive relationships. _That’s_ the societal norm. It’s not ‘cheating’…. Then again, everyone’s open about it. Maybe that’s your problem. Obviously, Adrien knows what’s going on, more or less, but you haven’t told Marinette about Adrien, have you? I can tell by how buddy-buddy she is with him, how easily she was joking downstairs in the kitchen. She has no idea Adrien wants you to leave her for him.”

Luka looked away.

Anarka groaned. “Have you even told her you’re bi yet?”

Luka shifted uncomfortably, refusing to meet his mother’s gaze.

“_Luuuuc_,” she chided gently, clicking her tongue.

“I’m working on it.” He blew out a long, tired breath. “I got pretty close last night. It’s just…things are really complicated between Adrien and Marinette. I’m trying to find a time to tell her that’s not going to hurt her and wreck our relationship.”

Anarka crossed her arms and gave a little “Hmph”. “If telling a girl you also like men is going to ruin your relationship with her, it doesn’t sound like you two have much as it is.”

Luka winced.

His heart spasmed at the thought that maybe it was true, maybe he didn’t mean much to Marinette after all.

“If she can’t accept you for who you are, Luc, maybe Marinette isn’t the one you’ve been searching for.”

Luka’s slouching posture further crumpled. “It’s…It’s complicated. It’s not that I don’t think she could accept me. It’s…just…telling her about everything with Adrien…I’m waiting for the right time. When it won’t hurt her.”

Anarka took a deep breath and considered her son for a moment before responding. “…You know, I think you need to sit down with the both of them and talk about this. Luka, I slept around a lot, but I was open about it with my partners, so it wasn’t a problem unless one of them started to get clingy. Maybe if you talked to Adrien and Marinette, you three could agree to an open relationship or maybe even a threesome. I mean, Marinette and Adrien still seem to have feelings for one another. Maybe you’re all making each other miserable for no reason.”

Luka sighed, leaning back and slumping against the sofa. “Adrien’s too possessive for an open relationship. You saw him today. He’s too insecure. I don’t know about Marinette, but I think a threesome is out for now because things are too complicated between them at the moment. They’re just starting to trust one another and be friends again….”

Luka looked away with another sigh. “And they still have a lot of issues and things they’re holding grudges for. Marinette went on a pretty intense tirade about Adrien last night, and Adrien sometimes makes some pretty nasty jealous, resentful comments about Marinette. I’m hesitant to say something and tip the balance, wreck their relationship. Adrien is already keeping score, and Marinette has an even worse competitive streak. I don’t want her to feel like she constantly has to one-up Adrien. I don’t want to be in the middle of an all-out war between them.”

Anarka nodded slowly, processing Luka’s estimation of the situation. “…Well, you don’t seem very happy with your relationship with Marinette right now. I can tell she likes you Luka, but it’s obvious that she’s just not as taken with you as she is with Adrien. _Adrien_, on the other hand… You know, two years ago, I was with Rose. I thought for sure he was going to be the one for you.”

Luka cringed at the reminder of what he had lost.

“Have you ever thought about breaking up with Marinette and giving things with Adrien another try?” Anarka pressed, studying her son’s profile intently.

A wave of undulating emotions washed over Luka’s face. He tipped his head back and scrubbed at his face with a long groan of frustration as he informed her, “Mom, Adrien and I aren’t compatible long-term. We want different things in a relationship, so dating him now is only going to hurt Marinette and break both Adrien and my hearts in the long run. My best chance is to just stick with Marinette and tough it out.”

Anarka bit the inside of her cheek. “Do you think a threesome would work in the future?” she inquired hesitantly. “You said that the idea was out right now, but…how about when things with Marinette and Adrien are more stable? Is that something you’d want?”

Luka let out a broken little sigh as he turned to his mother. “Yes, but…I’m afraid to say anything.”

“Why?” Anarka urged.

“Because…I’m scared that if they realize they can be together again, they’ll go off and be together and leave me behind,” he confessed in a small voice, looking very much like the tearful five-year-old who had woken her in the middle of the night when he’d dreamed that she’d turned into bubbles and been carried away by the Seine.

She reached out and gently began to pet his hair, massaging his scalp like she’d done when he was little. “Lulu, why would they ever do that?”

He closed his eyes and leaned into her touch. “Because they don’t really want me. I’m nobody’s first choice, Maman. Marinette only agreed to go out with me after things with Adrien blew up because I make her feel better, and Adrien is practically the same. He’s only throwing himself at me so hard because the girl he really wants rejected him. It’s what happened two years ago too. I’m just a consolation prize…one that no one actually wants,” he muttered ruefully.

Anarka felt her heart throb and ache for her baby. Normally he was so mature and responsible and collected. It was no secret that he was the one that kept the household from deteriorating into utter chaos. He kept them running and somewhat organized. He was the stabilizing influence in all of the mess. It was easy for Anarka to forget that Luka was just barely out of childhood. He’d been the adult of the house since he was ten and the man he’d called “Father” had left them.

Besides the notable exceptions of the breakups with Honoré and Adrien, Luka was always tranquil, cheerful, levelheaded, laidback, and slow to anger. It was easy to assume that everything was fine with him, that he had it under control. Anarka hadn’t suspected that her boy was harboring that kind of pain and insecurity in his heart.

“Oh, Luka,” she cooed. “Honey…maybe you need to break things off with the both of them and find someone else. Luka, you haven’t been very happy this year.” She hurried to continue as he opened his mouth to cut her off, “—Yes, I know they _do_ make you happy at times, but…not consistently. They make you miserable a lot, and I don’t like seeing you this way.”

“It’s fine,” Luka lied. “I’m fine.”

Anarka shook her head slowly. “Luc, you are a wonderful person, and the person who ends up with you should feel like they won the lottery. To hear you say that you don’t feel like Adrien and Marinette really want you…Honey, that breaks my heart. You deserve better. You deserve someone who wants to kiss and make love to you all day long. You deserve someone who’s going to commit to you like you commit to them. Stop letting people walk all over you. Stop being so patient and selfless and good all the time and do something for _you_, Luka. You can’t put yourself on the backburner forever,” she chided, trying to talk sense into him.

Luka huffed in frustration. “What would you have me do, Maman?”

“Break up with them,” Anarka decreed simply. “Go date around and have some good sex until you find someone else you click with who will make _you_ a priority. If it takes a few years, it takes a few years, but, for Heaven’s sake, get Marinette and Adrien out of your system.”

Luka pulled away with a long, exhausted sigh. “I see only a few problems with your plan.”

“Only a few?” she snorted in laughter.

“One, I only sleep with people I’m in love with.”

Anarka rolled her icy blue eyes. “Which I will never understand.”

He rolled his right back at her. “You don’t have to understand it, Mom. I only ask that you try to accept it.”

“Clearly, I didn’t teach you right,” she sulked.

He snorted. “For my fourteenth birthday you gave me a box of condoms and told me I could sleep with whomever I wanted so long as I always used protection and didn’t get anyone pregnant. What exactly was that supposed to teach me?”

“Responsibility, autonomy, good decision-making skills,” she recited. “Possibly how to clean up your own messes and learn from mistakes. You were supposed to go out and experiment and learn from life experience. I don’t know how you got it in your head that waiting for marriage was a thing.”

“Not marriage necessarily,” Luka chuckled. “Just love. Which brings me to problem number two with your plan: I love Adrien and Marinette. There is no getting them out of my system because I’ve been smitten with them for over four years now. No matter who else I’m with, my feelings for them never change. I don’t think there ever will be anyone I love more than them, and that’s not fair to other prospective partners. Everyone I’ve dated since the breakup with Adrien…they’ve been fine—some of them have been great, even—but none of the guys _are_ Adrien, and none of the girls are Marinette. It’s a constant comparison, and that’s not right, Mom.”

Anarka shook her head and sighed in defeat. “How did I manage to raise such a martyr? So what’s _your_ plan? You’re just going to let Marinette and Adrien squeeze the life and joy out of you and make you feel unwanted all the time?”

Luka looked away. “It’s not _that_ bad. It’s not always like this. I’m just in a bit of a slump right now…. Sometimes they do things that make me feel really good, like they _do_ love me and they do understand and really do get me. Adrien wrote a song about me, and he comes to band rehearsals and all my gigs to support me. With Marinette, it’s all the little things that add up. She memorized my schedule, and she always brings me lunch on the days when I have back to back classes and don’t have time to run and get something myself. Adrien is all about the grand gestures, but Marinette shows that she cares constantly in small ways like bringing over study snacks or patching up ratty jeans. It’s not perfect, but…they don’t squeeze the life and joy out of me.” He looked back at her hesitantly, eyes silently entreating her for some kind word of encouragement.

Anarka’s shoulders slumped. She wanted to demand, “So do they love you or don’t they?”, but she was starting to see that it was far more complicated than that. In a way, she could relate. Anarka hadn’t loved much in her life, but she had loved the man Luka and Juleka called “Father”. She remembered the explosive, draining eleven years she had spent with him. She remembered wanting to strangle him. She remembered wanting to die without him. She remembered the violent fights and the passionate making up. She remembered feeling loved and understood. She remembered feeling completely alone.

She supposed Luka’s relationship with Marinette and Adrien was complicated like that.

“All right,” she relented. “Okay. It’s your life, Luc, and you’re old enough to decide what to do with it. I’ve said my peace, and now I’m going to butt out. If you want to talk about this some more, you know I’m always there for you, but this is obviously something that you’re going to have to work out on your own.”

Luka nodded, seemingly satisfied with the conclusion to their discussion. “Thanks, Maman.”

She stood and clapped him on the shoulder with an affectionate smile. “Yeah, yeah. You’re welcome. Go back to your girlfriend and your lover. Just…” She grimaced. “Be careful with your heart, Luc…and don’t get caught cheating.”

He laughed as he got to his feet and bent down to hug her. “Thanks, Mom.”

She gave him a solid squeeze and prayed for the best, knowing that that was all she could do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There you go. ^.^ I hope that was interesting. What did you think? How was Anarka's characterization?
> 
> To me, Anarka seems very chaotic and not really keen on the establishment or the established order of society. I don't think she would believe in marriage or tying herself down to one partner for an extended period of time. I think she's a free spirit who doesn't like to be bound by anything. She doesn't seem to plan long-term and seems to live very much in the moment. She doesn't seem to believe in rules, and I think she would value experimentation, self-expression, and learning from life experience. I think she would encourage her children to do whatever they wanted, whatever felt good or right in the moment so long as they went about it in a safe (enough/ish) way. I think she would let Luka and Juleka figure things out themselves for the most part unless she could see them really struggling. Then, I think she would step in and offer advice but never fix their problems for them unless they asked for help with something. She seems the type to butt out and let her kids live their lives.
> 
> That's my take on her, anyway, from what little canon I have to go on. I'd be interested in hearing your thoughts.
> 
> Thanks for reading guys! Next chapter will be Nino and Luka as requested by Buggy. I think I should have it up on Monday, 11/25/2019. See you soon!


	21. Bubble, Bubble

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Luka and Nino TALK re: Adrien.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! How is it going? I'm so-so. Glad for the long weekend coming up because I need the rest. ^.^; Thanks for joining me for today's installment. I'm really pleased that you guys liked the Lukanette/Lukadrien/Lukadrienette chapters and the Anarka and Luka chapter last time. If you'd be interested in seeing Lukanette at the beginning of the relationship while they're still sweet and optimistic, before things get complicated, Chapter Nine of Jabberwocky that I released on Friday (here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20609582/chapters/51308188) is that. It reads like another Nachtmusik chapter in that it can stand on its own, so if you're interested in more Lukanette from this universe, it's out there.
> 
> As for today's chapter, this is the other one that Buggy requested with how Nino views the Lukadrienette situation. It takes place during Jabberwocky over the summer in July/August when Nino is eighteen and Luka is twenty and a half. 
> 
> Before we get started, I want to remind everyone that I deal in unreliable narrators. Nino is not Adrien and, therefore, does not have access to the thoughts inside Adrien's head. You should not take Nino's word for what Adrien thinks and feels, so take Nino's opinions with a grain of sugar, please. Enjoy!

Luka wasn’t quite sure what he’d been expecting.

He’d received a text string from Nino, simply reading, “yo.”, “meet friday 13:00 [place du châtelet](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Place_du_Ch%C3%A2telet) by fountain?”, “need to talk.”

Honestly, it had felt rather cryptic, but Luka assumed it was something about Marinette and agreed to the meeting.

Friday at one, he parked his motorcycle by the fence bordering parts of the plaza, next to one of the many trees lining the perimeter. He took off his helmet and shook out his squished hair like a wet dog shedding excess water.

Nino was sitting on the lip of the [Fontaine du Palmier](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fontaine_du_Palmier) with his back to the column rising out of the center, one of the four sphynxes spewing jets of water directly behind him. He was tapping his foot along to the music coursing through his headphones, and it seemed like he didn’t notice Luka’s approach at first, but when he did, Nino gave Luka a nod of acknowledgement and slipped the headphones down to rest around his neck.

“What’s up with the bubbles?” Luka couldn’t help but ask.

Nino gave a snort and a wry smile as he pulled the bubble wand out of the bottle and blew another stream of soapy, opalescent orbs into the air. “Stress relief. It’s very calming. Really mindless in a therapeutic kind of way. I blow bubbles when I’m ticked. I used to do it for fun too, but…not so much anymore.”

“Oh,” Luka replied politely, nodding. He sensed a story there but could tell from Nino’s wildly fluctuating aura that it would be best not to ask.

“It’s also a reminder to control my temper,” Nino continued in a warning tone, flashing a neon red sign concerning his current mood. “as well as of how much Adrien means to me.”

There was something dangerous in Nino’s eyes, a rattlesnake’s tail shake in his voice at the word “Adrien”, and Luka realized what it was that Nino thought they needed to talk about.

“I see,” Luka muttered gravely. “And that’s why we’re here?”

Nino nodded, blowing an additional stream of bubbles. “I’m going to level with you. This,” He lifted the bubble wand and bottle. “is to give my hands something to do besides punch you in the face. I picked this plaza so that there’d be witnesses so that I’d think twice about punching you. Adrien seems to think you’re some kind of angel or something, but I have to admit that I’m not a fan.”

“That’s fair,” Luka allowed. “So, I gather this is about things between me and Adrien?”

“I’m here to tell you to back the hell off,” Nino informed. “Break things off and stay away from him. Like, never talk to him again.”

Unexpectedly, something inside Luka snapped. Normally he was very slow to get upset, but that reminder of what Gabriel had done to them, separating Adrien and Luka for _two _**years**, it set off all kinds of alarm bells and defence responses in Luka’s mind.

“No,” Luka answered curtly. “I don’t think I will. Sorry, but Adrien is too important to me to give him up just because you’re jealous and want him for yourself. You’ll have to think of some other way of getting out of the friend-zone with him than comforting him over losing me.”

Nino’s face flushed dark, a dangerous-looking snarl contorting his features as he stood to match Luka’s height. “Dude, that is _not_ what this is about.”

Luka laughed mockingly, crossing his arms and tipping his head. “Oh, it’s not? Lahiffe, I have _seen_ the way you look at him. Sometimes it’s not very platonic. Pardon the pun, but, if we’re going to do this, be straight with me.”

Nino’s grip on the bubble wand and bottle tightened. “Okay. Fine. Sometimes he pushes my less-than-straight buttons, but that is a teeny, tiny part of my relationship with him. An insignificant crush like that means nothing next to everything else we’ve been through together. Above all, Adrien is my friend, and I love him like a brother. This isn’t about me. This is about you messing around with my brother, so don’t you dare drag this down to the level of a cheap crush and petty jealousy.”

Luka uncrossed his arms and made a placating gesture with his palms at the level of his chest. He gave a nonchalant shrug.

“And another thing,” Nino hissed, capping the bubbles so that he could point a finger accusatorially at Luka. “I have a _girlfriend_, and I _love_ her. You know, that actually _means_ something to some people.”

Luka gave a snort, hand going to his hip as he raised his chin challengingly. “Why don’t you just say what you came here to say and be done with it already?”

“Did you tell Adrien you were in love with him?” Nino spit.

Luka blinked, the fight momentarily surprised out of him. He frowned, confused. “I mean…yes?”

Past tense. Luka had told Adrien that first night they’d gone to the opera together that Luka had been in love with Adrien that summer two years prior.

Nino hissed like something being dropped into hot oil. “Mec, you can’t _do_ that.”

Luka laughed indignantly. “Too late?”

“Look, I don’t know why you said that, if you thought it’d get you into his pants or whatever,”

Luka took a step forward and almost grabbed Nino for daring to sully the memory of how Luka had felt that summer, but halfway through the step he came to his senses and stomped down the urge to lash out in retaliation.

“but you can’t _say_ stuff like that to Adrien,” Nino continued. “Like, it actually means something to him.”

“Crazy, because it meant something to me too,” Luka remarked flatly.

Nino shook his head, jaw set in a hard line. “No, Mec. Like, it _means_ something. In Adrien’s mind, people don’t love Adrien. Marinette doesn’t love Adrien. Gabriel doesn’t love Adrien. None of his screaming fangirls love Adrien. I let him down, so _I_ don’t love Adrien. The guy’s got it in his head that his mother didn’t even love him because she didn’t take him with her when she ran away. He thinks he’s unlovable. I’m gonna say it again because this is important: Adrien thinks he’s _unlovable_.”

Luka’s face fell. Yes, Adrien had always been extremely insecure about other people’s feelings for him, but Luka hadn’t realized how deep-seated an issue this was.

“And then _you_ come along,” Nino growled, “and you somehow manage to convince him that you really do love him. Do you maybe get it now? What that means to him? How important that is to him? You said, ‘I love you’, and he heard promises. He heard, ‘I’ll _always_ love you’ and ‘I want to marry you’ and ‘happily ever after’. Do you maybe get now some semblance of what you’ve done?”

Luka was silent as his mind raced, trying to pick through Nino’s bias to the truth.

“I don’t know why you said that.” Nino shook his head slowly and sighed. “I don’t know if you just enjoyed watching him fawn all over you or what, but whatever you intended, it’s blown up bigger than you could have possibly anticipated.

“Adrien had a really sheltered, isolated childhood,” Nino explained wearily. “He didn’t have the chance to interact with others and learn about relationships in real life. He bases his expectations and behavior off of fairytales and anime because _that’s_ what he’s primarily been exposed to. Seriously. Take his age and subtract ten. _That’s_ the level of emotional intelligence and maturity he has. _That’s_ why this whole thing with Marinette is so hard for him. He thought he’d found his soulmate and everything was magically going to work out because that’s how it always goes in the fantasy world he lives in. He has no frame of reference to help him deal with this besides shutting down like his dad did when his mom left. He doesn’t know how to deal with a world without ‘happily ever after’s.”

Nino sighed and sat back down on the lip of the fountain, tiredly uncapping the bottle and taking out the bubble wand once more. He gave Luka a pleading look. “He was doing better, though. He was doing really well with therapy and learning how to live in the real world and take care of himself and coping strategies and all that…but then you came along with your ‘I love you’, and he’s latched onto that. He thinks he’s a Disney princess and you’re his Prince Charming and you’re going to save him. …I think you’re smart enough to know that you can’t save him, even if you wanted to,” Nino added darkly. “Adrien has to save himself. That’s how the real world works. When it comes to mental health stuff and becoming stronger people, other people can help, but they can’t do the work for us. I’ve tried telling him that. I’ve tried explaining that you’re not in love with him and that you’re not going to leave Marinette and sweep him off his feet and take him away to happily ever after…but he’s not hearing me, so I thought I’d talk to you.”

Luka frowned grimly. “What do you expect me to do about this?”

Nino shrugged, blowing a gentle stream of bubbles. “Talk to him. Break his heart gently so his friends and family and I can get him refocused on getting himself better.”

Luka took a deep breath. “And what if I really am in love with him and want to sweep him off his feet and take him away?”

Nino rolled his eyes. “Dude. You have a girlfriend. Do the decent thing and lie. Break his heart anyway and stop cheating on Marinette.”

“If I say no?” Luka tested.

Nino glared. “I’m going to tell your girlfriend what you’re doing behind her back.”

A jolt of fear raced through Luka’s veins for an instant before a realization came to him: “If you tell on me, you’ll be snitching on Adrien. I don’t think that will do much for his trust in you.”

Nino shrugged. “I don’t have to tell Marinette who you’re cheating with.”

“She won’t believe you unless you do,” Luka countered.

Nino glowered.

Somehow, the victory felt extremely hollow to Luka.

“…Well,” Luka remarked aimlessly after a minute of hostile silence. “If that’s all you needed?”

“Bastard,” Nino spit, giving Luka the finger.

Luka nodded, unphased. “I’ll talk to him about expectations, but I’m not breaking his heart, and I’m not giving him up again. I’m not going to lie to him…but I’m not going to lie to him either…if that makes any sense.”

“I hope the rest of your day sucks,” Nino replied cheerily, reemphasizing his middle finger.

Luka grinned. “Thanks. You too.” He turned, raising a hand to wave goodbye over his shoulder as he went.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How was that? Different than what you were expecting? Do we like the Bulleur/Bubbler references, or are they cheesy and cliché? Were there any lines in particular that you liked? 
> 
> What are your thoughts on Luka and Nino's relationship in this universe? Perhaps you think Nino is being too harsh and assuming the worst about Luka (who we all know to be the sweetest human being ever), but from Nino's perspective, Luka is cheating on Marinette and messing around with Adrien's heart and his mental health progress.
> 
> (Also, I'm aware that the line is supposed to be "Double, double toil and trouble; fire burn and cauldron bubble...". "Bubble, Bubble" just worked better for me.)
> 
> So, I love the plaza where Luka and Nino meet. I first saw the obelisk rising up out of the center of the fountain from a boat I was riding down the Seine, and I thought, "That is super neat! I love that!" It was only later when I went back and watched Dislocoeur/Dark Cupid again that I realized that it was THAT plaza. I actually had to do some digging to figure out what the plaza was called. I failed to take note of it while I was in Paris, and it was a pain to find again. XD
> 
> Next up is actually an Adrienette/Lukadrienette piece. I have to do some heavy editing, but I hope to have it up on Thursday 11/28/2019. See you soon!
> 
> References:  
Place du Châtelet: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Place_du_Châtelet  
Fontaine du Palmier: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fontaine_du_Palmier


	22. Mercurial

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Are we friends today?"  
Adrienette bickering and fluff with a Lukadrienette cherry on top.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! I'm publishing this a little earlier than anticipated because the firm closed a few hours early today, so I had a little extra time and I know I'm going to be swamped with people at my house tomorrow. Happy Thanksgiving to all those celebrating! To all those not, Happy Thursday! I'm sorry that you don't have an excuse to eat pumpkin pie. You should eat pumpkin pie anyway. It's really good.
> 
> Anyway! This chapter takes place during Jabberwocky/Daisy at the end of September/beginning of October. It's before Gabriel and Nathalie's wedding and about one month after Marinette and Adrien start university. Marinette is eighteen, Adrien is eighteen and a half, and Luka is just short of twenty-one.
> 
> Enjoy!

They were supposed to be meeting up after Luka finished tutoring that evening, but his student had a test coming up and needed some extra help, so the session was running over, and Luka wasn’t sure when he’d be done.

“just make yourself at home ill b there ASA i can”, read his text.

Marinette sighed as she descended the steps into the main cabin of the Liberty, bypassing the living area and heading for Luka’s bedroom. She was tired and didn’t feel like running into Juleka, Rose, or Anarka. It had been a bit of a rough day at work with the other interns, and she was seriously looking forward to spending the evening cuddling with her boyfriend.

She opened the door and slipped inside, flipping on the lights. She was surprised to find a person-sized lump in Luka’s bed.

There was no way that Luka had made it back already and settled in for a nap. She’d only received his text twenty minutes before.

Still, she cautiously approached, calling, “Luka?”

The lump stirred with a soft moan.

Marinette pulled back the comforter and ended up in a staring contest with a shirtless Adrien Agreste.

The mutual gawking lasted nearly a full minute before Marinette broke the silence by observing aloud, “You look awful.”

Adrien gave an irate hiss as he snatched back the covers, pulling them back over his head. “Thanks for telling me. I had no idea, and I really needed to know that,” he grumbled sarcastically.

Marinette sighed. “Sorry, Chaton. I didn’t mean—…Adrien, why are you crying?”

“I’m not crying,” he huffed from under the covers, curling around one of Luka’s pillows, mortified at being caught like this.

“Okay, but you _were_ crying. I can tell. Your eyes are red, and your face is all blotchy,” she reasoned. “What happened? Why were you crying?”

“Ask me why I’m half-naked in your boyfriend’s bed instead,” he scoffed. “That seems like the more pressing issue, don’t you think?”

She rolled her eyes in exasperation, crossing her arms. “You were upset, so you came to see Luka. He’s not home, and he’s not answering his phone because he’s tutoring someone right now, so you’re here waiting.”

Adrien was petulantly silent.

Marinette could feel her partner pouting.

“No,” Adrien growled feebly, trying to keep his wounded pride from falling to pieces. “I’m sleeping with your boyfriend. I thought it’d be a nice surprise for him to find a treat in his bed when he got home, is all.”

Marinette did not dignify Adrien’s childish behavior with a response. “Chaton, he’s probably going to be a while, and then he’s going to be spending the evening with me. Have you tried calling Nino?”

Adrien stiffened. “…He’s with Alya.”

“How about Chloé?” Marinette moved down the list of his closest friends.

“She and Kagami are hanging out tonight,” Adrien muttered, squeezing the pillow tighter to his chest.

“That’s perfect. Why don’t you see if you can hang out with them?” she suggested.

He gave a snort of annoyance. “You know how Chloé had a ridiculous crush on Ladybug for the longest time?”

Marinette squirmed uncomfortably. “Yeah?”

“Well, now it kind of seems like Chloé has a ridiculous crush on Kagami. I’m sure Kagami has no clue, so she wouldn’t mind if I crashed their girls’ night, but it would be just as bad as shoehorning my way in on Alya and Nino’s date for Chloé,” he explained a little impatiently.

“O-Oh.” Marinette bit her lip. “Well…what about Rose? You two have been hanging out more since school started, haven’t you? Isn’t she around here somewhere? Maybe you could go sit with her.”

“Juleka is taking her to a little farmer’s market festival. They have music and shopping and a petting zoo. Like, real-life llamas and alpacas and goats and pigs and chickens you can pet. They even have a cow you can milk,” Adrien recounted, sounding very much like he would have liked to have gone with them. “…Rose was really excited about it,” he concluded glumly.

“Okay,” Marinette sighed. “Well, maybe you should go home, then, and spend some time with your parents.”

“I have just as much right to be here as you do,” he snapped back at her defensively. “Besides, I was here first,” he argued, not meaning just that day. “When Luka gets here, he can decide whom he wants to spend the evening with, but until he tells me to leave, I’m not leaving. You’re not his wife, Marinette. You don’t get to kick me out.”

“Adrien, I wasn’t kicking you out.” She blew out a long breath. She _had_ been trying to get rid of him, but… “I was just trying to help you find someplace else where someone could make you feel better because Luka and I have plans, and, obviously, being here isn’t helping you. Come on, Chaton,” she coaxed, pulling down the covers. “Get up. Let’s find you somewhere to go.”

“I’m staying _here_,” he hissed through the lazy stream of tears trickling down his cheeks. He grabbed for the comforter.

“Adrien,” she chided, keeping him from pulling the covers back up over his head.

“What?” he snapped, glaring over his shoulder at her. “It’s not like I’d be interrupting anything between you two. You’re not actually dating. You don’t even like him,” Adrien accused.

Marinette let go of the covers as if they had shocked her. She stared numbly at Adrien.

Adrien stared back, the anger and hurt quickly draining from him, turning into fear.

She turned away, going over to the porthole and gazing out unseeingly.

Adrien cautiously sat up and watched her, his insides roiling.

“…Sorry,” he whispered after a long, drawn-out moment of tension.

She didn’t say anything.

He watched as she wrapped her arms around herself more tightly and chewed on her bottom lip in agitation.

“Milady,” he called tentatively.

She didn’t respond.

“Princess? I’m sorry,” he tried again with more conviction.

Marinette sighed and turned her head to meet his gaze blankly. She shrugged.

“I’m sorry I’m acting like a total witch to you. I had a bad day, and I came here to get away from all the criticism and sarcasm and…” He took a deep breath. “…I’m jealous, okay?”

She frowned, her expression starting to thaw. “Jealous?”

“Of him. Of you,” Adrien clarified, cheeks heating up at the admission. “Both of you…. You _do_ know I like him, don’t you?”

Slowly, she nodded. “Yeah…. I kind of picked up on that. …You’re clingy with him.”

“I’m not clingy,” he grumbled, going back on the defensive.

She rolled her eyes. “You’re always gravitating towards him and hanging off of him. You’re clingy, Adrien. …Though, you’re clingy with everyone.”

“Not everyone,” Adrien muttered sullenly. “I was trying to apologize, you know. You don’t have to go and be a jerk.”

Marinette shrugged dismissively. “I’m not.”

“You are,” he accused flatly.

She stared at him for a minute and groaned, “…What are we even fighting about?”

She was too tired for this.

“You knew I liked your boyfriend?” he reminded.

Marinette shook her head. “I mean, I know in recent years you’ve discovered that you like flirting with guys and having them pay attention to you, and I see how you are with Luka and how…I don’t know…indulgent he is with you. I know how special Luka is, how wonderful he is, how he can make other people feel… He’s easy to like. It just made sense that you would have a crush on him.”

“You don’t sound like you have a problem with this?” Adrien observed, confused. If Adrien knew that someone had a crush on Marinette or Luka, Adrien would be seeing red.

“I mean…” Marinette looked him in the eye and calmly asked, “It’s not like there’s anything going on between you. It’s not like this crush of yours is going anywhere, right?”

Adrien’s heart crumpled like the bumper of a sports car plowed through by a semi.

His gaze dropped to the comforter, to the two-year-old nail polish stain that had come to symbolize for Adrien all the what-ifs and missed chances between himself and Luka.

“No,” he whispered in defeat. “No. It isn’t going anywhere.”

“Then what point would there be in me getting upset? You can’t help how you feel,” she reasoned. “So long as _Luka_ doesn’t have a problem with it, but he doesn’t really seem to mind.”

“Yeah,” Adrien chuckled darkly. “He’s pretty—What was the word?—‘_indulgent’_ with me.”

They fell into an uneasy silence once more, Adrien studying the teal and aqua nail polish stain and Marinette studying Adrien.

“…Are you okay?” she asked, even though she knew the answer.

He sighed wearily, gripping and releasing the bedspread rhythmically. “…Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine.”

“Am I bothering you? Do you want me to go? I can go wait out in the great room if you want me to leave you alone,” she offered. “I mean, you’re right; you _were_ here first.”

Adrien shrugged, lying back down. “I don’t care. It doesn’t really matter. Luka’s just going to kick me out when he gets here to hang out with you, so I don’t see the point in _you_ going anywhere. I should…” His voice broke, and he had to clear his throat and swallow before he could speak again. “I should probably just go home and save myself the shame and embarrassment of Luka asking me to leave. It’s not like he’d actually choose an evening of dealing with my crap when he could be snuggling with you, so I don’t even know whom I was kidding, thinking maybe he’d pick me.”

Her partner’s misery was palpable: the dejection of feeling rejected yet again hanging heavy in the air between them.

She wanted to say something to make it better, but she was at a total loss. The gulf between them seemed so wide, especially when _she_ was the root cause of his suffering in the first place.

“Nino was right,” Adrien muttered. “I’m just making a fool of myself with this crush. I’m just hurting myself.”

“Adrien…” she breathed.

“Sorry,” he laughed. “You must think I’m a total idiot, the way I’m throwing myself at your boyfriend like this.”

Marinette’s heart flinched in sympathy. There were plenty of times when _she’d_ felt like an idiot trying to get Adrien’s attention.

“…I think I’m going to go,” she replied, turning and heading for the door. “Today was really rough. I don’t actually feel like hanging out with Luka,” she lied, pausing in the doorway, catching the doorjamb and glancing back at Adrien. “…Minou, don’t be so hard on yourself. You’re doing a really good job. Don’t give up just because things are hard. Just keep doing what you’re doing with the therapy and hanging out with friends and family and working on yourself, and things will work out, okay?”

Adrien found himself nodding, not sure exactly why she was encouraging him or what she meant was going to work out. His life in general? Things with her? Things with Luka?

“I hope Luka gets here soon and you start feeling better,” she added, turning to go. “Good night, Adrien.”

“W-Wait,” he called.

She looked back at him, an eyebrow arching interrogatively.

“Why?” he asked weakly, thrown by her kindness.

Her brows pinched closer together. “Why what?”

“Why are you canceling your plans with your boyfriend so I can spend time with him?” he clarified. 

She shrugged, looking down at her boots. “You’ve had a rough day, you look like you could use someone to talk to, and all of your other friends are busy.”

“…Are _we_ friends today?” Adrien wondered.

“We’re always friends,” Marinette sighed. “…We just don’t always act like it.”

“…Didn’t you say that you’d had a rough day too?” he inquired cautiously.

She looked up and shrugged. “Yeah. What about it?”

“…Wanna talk about it?” he hesitantly offered.

Marinette blinked slowly.

“You don’t have to,” Adrien was hasty to add.

“It’s…nothing. It wasn’t that bad,” she hedged.

He bit his lip. “…You don’t usually get upset over nothing.”

“I’m not upset,” she countered, “and have you met me? I get upset over literally the littlest things.”

He shook his head. “No. You _freak out_ about the littlest things. It takes something bigger to upset you. This feels like the kind of thing that gets under your skin and rubs until it festers.”

She turned her body to face him and crossed her arms across her chest. “How can you tell?”

Adrien shrugged. “Micro-expressions. It’s in the corners of your mouth and eyes. There’s a little pinch there. The slope of your eyebrows too. You’re tired.”

Marinette deliberately tried to change her expression. “You’re making that up,” she accused, uncomfortable that he could read her so thoroughly.

He snorted. “You underestimate the amount of time I’ve spent looking at you. I know my Lady, and I know my Princess.”

Her cheeks went red as her shoulders rose to meet her ears.

“You don’t have to talk to me if you don’t want, Marinette. I was just offering,” he explained, giving her an out. “You look like maybe you could use someone to talk to too, but if you don’t feel like you can talk to me, that—”

“—That’s not it,” she cut him off, gradually coming forward. “It’s not that…not that I can’t talk to you.” She stopped beside the bed, worrying at her bottom lip. “You’re kind of the only person I can really talk to…without all the masks. I mean, with you…I don’t have to pretend to be happy or friendly or whatever. Our relationship is already a wreck. You know what a mess I am, so it’s not like I have anything to hide from you like I do my other friends and my parents…and my boyfriend. It’s not that I _can’t_ talk to you.”

He nodded slowly. He didn’t feel the same way exactly, but there were parts of what she was saying that he could relate to.

“It’s more…” She rolled her lips back over her teeth and bit down in thought as she tried to phrase the sentence right. “I’m not sure I remember how to talk to you. It’s like going back to traditional media after using digital for a few months. It’s kind of awkward, and it doesn’t feel like I’m doing it right, and I know I’m making all kinds of mistakes.”

“That’s fair,” he replied, hoping to make her feel like the way she was feeling was valid. “I’m in a forgiving mood at the moment, if you want to try.” He patted the bed next to his feet, inviting her to sit.

“All right,” she sighed. “Scoot over.”

Adrien gave an indignant snort. “Excuse you. This is _my_ side of the bed. Try to take it from me and there will be bloodshed.”

Marinette laughed loudly, caught off guard. “You have a side of someone else’s bed?”

He shrugged imperiously. “This is _my_ bed. I claimed it two years ago. I only let Luka use it out of the goodness of my heart.”

“Your cattiness is showing, Minou,” Marinette snickered. “Is this like how Chat and Adrien each have a special hot cocoa mug at my house that no one else is allowed to use?”

“I’m very territorial. I can’t help it,” he sniffed. “Now take off your shoes and climb over. You can have Luka’s spot by the wall, but you’re not taking my side.”

Marinette laughed as she rolled her eyes and kicked off her shoes. She slipped off the off-the-shoulder sweater she was wearing over a camisole and tossed the sweater to the floor beside Adrien’s shirt. She climbed over him and settled under the covers at his side.

“…This is a little surreal,” she observed.

“What?” he chuckled. “You and me in your boyfriend’s bed? I kind of like the irony of it all.”

She slapped his arm, sighing loudly. “Today sucked.”

“Yeah?” he asked softly, turning on his side and gently tugging her hair out of its bun so that he could run his fingers soothingly along her scalp.

“Mm,” she confirmed, eyes fluttering closed as she leaned into the touch. “Work was stressful.”

“Is my dad treating you okay?” he asked urgently, a protective instinct suddenly awakening in him. “Marinette, if you need me to talk to him, just say the word and I’ll—”

“—Gabriel’s fine,” she assured, shaking her head. “Thank you, but he’s not the problem. I mean, he’s very strict and completely uncompromising. He can be unreasonable, but I get the feeling that he’d never ask me to do something he hasn’t done himself or wouldn’t be willing to do. He works hard too. He doesn’t just push us; he pushes himself, so… I mean, I don’t really like your father as a person, but I respect his work and his work ethic. Gabriel’s not the problem.”

“Then what is?” Adrien prompted.

She gave a little groan and opened her eyes to stare intently into his. “You can’t tell your father. Promise me you won’t say a word.”

“What is it?” Adrien pressed.

“You’re not promising,” she observed.

“No, I’m not,” he confirmed.

She groaned again. “You can’t say anything. They’ll know it was me who told, and then it will just get worse.”

“Hey,” he cooed, brushing her hair back behind her ear. “I would never do something that would hurt you.”

She raised an eyebrow.

“Okay. Intentionally,” he qualified but then amended, “Unless it was in the heat of the moment and I was mad at you or something, but this is about that coven of witches you work with, right? The other interns?”

That got a chuckle out of her. “That’s an insult to witches. Those girls are…like a coven of Lilas.” She scrunched up her nose.

Adrien winced. “Are they really that bad?”

Marinette shook her head. “No. That’s being too harsh. They’re just…mean. They’ll hide things from me or they won’t transmit messages or…just little things like that, but…the constant animosity and antagonistic behavior…it’s just wearing on me.”

“Oh, Meinu,” Adrien whispered, pulling her into his chest, reaching around to rub calming circles on her back between the shoulder blades. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s just professional jealousy,” she mumbled into his collarbone. “They think I get special treatment—extra assignments, more responsibility, more freedom to experiment, more trust. Gabriel listens when I have an idea. He takes more time with me, offering me pointers. I do a lot of grunt work too—a _lot_ of grunt work—but…I _do_ get special treatment, so I understand why they’re jealous. It’s not like they’re just mad that I’m more talented than they are or something.”

“But you _are_ more talented than they are,” Adrien snorted. “My dad saw promise in you the first time you met. It’s only natural that he’d want to nurture your gifts.” Hesitantly, Adrien added, “…He still hasn’t given up hope that you and I will work things out and that you’ll marry me.”

She drew in a long breath.

“He wants you to be his successor,” Adrien whispered into her hair.

Marinette was silent for a moment as she tried to get her thoughts straight. “…I kind of thought…maybe I was just imagining things, but…that’s kind of what it feels like, being groomed.”

“Don’t freak out,” Adrien sighed, feeling her whole body go rigid in his arms. “I mean, seriously, Princess. No pressure. You don’t owe us anything. It’s your life, your choice. Just absorb as much wisdom and knowledge as you can from this opportunity, and if we end up married with three kids and a fashion empire, great. If you end up with someone else and your own empire…great.” It was a little harder to get “great” out the second time. “Just…make the most of this and let the future worry about itself.”

“…Okay,” Marinette agreed, taking a deep breath to calm herself and inadvertently getting a nose full of Adrien’s Bvlgari Blv body wash. The intoxicating scent actually helped her relax more than the deep breath alone. She let herself sink into him, snuggling closer. “Thank you, Beau Gosse.”

“Anything for my Princess,” he assured, feeling the stress leave his own body as he pet her hair rhythmically. “You’re sure I can’t say anything about the bullying? Maybe just to Nathalie? And not have her do anything directly but just…just to make her aware of the problem?”

“Thank you, Adrien, but I wish you wouldn’t. I’m okay. Don’t worry about me,” she assured.

He clicked his tongue sullenly.

“What about you?” she attempted to divert his attention. “You said that you had a rough day. What happened?”

He sighed as she wrapped her arms around him and began rubbing and scritching and playing with his hair in a way that made his body turn into a puddle.

“Similar to you, actually,” he murmured into her hair, strands sticking to his lips. “There’s this Tyrannosaurus-jerk in my acting class who has been giving me trouble from day one. He still talks about how I only got into the program because my dad paid my way in and my mom was a famous stage actor.”

Adrien sighed, deflating. “I mean, I _know_ it’s true because Dad only agreed to allow me to study acting and switch universities at the last minute after all the enrollment deadlines had passed, but…I feel like, by now, I’ve proven that I deserve to be there as much as anyone else in the program.

“…I’m _good_ at this,” he stressed, as if trying to convince her. “Like, this is the thing that I am genuinely _good_ at. After years of doing everything that’s ever been asked of me and enjoying so little of it, acting is the thing that I actually love doing, and I’m good at it, and it feels good to finally feel things click into place. It feels good to feel like I found where I belong…but this jerk has to try to take that away from me because he’s jealous that I’m rich and beautiful…and _talented_ on top of that,” he snorted and then sighed tiredly. “Sorry for the rant.”

“It’s okay,” she assured. “I’m listening, Chaton. Let it out…. Did he do something in particular today to set you off, or is this just the result of everything building up?”

Adrien groaned even as he arched into her fingers. “So, every week we have to perform a scene or a song or something. Sometimes it’s solo. Sometimes it’s groups or pairs. We get to pick our teams occasionally, but today the prof, Céline, picked, and she stuck me with Jerkzilla.”

“Can you talk to her about it?” Marinette suggested.

“Buginette, she _knows_,” Adrien sighed. “Gilbert has been openly antagonistic towards me since the term started. Céline is kind of…I guess…like how my father is with you. She pushes me and challenges me beyond the point of what she’d do for most of the other students. She sees promise in me, and she either wants to help it flourish or crush it into an oblivion. Sometimes it’s hard to tell.”

Marinette nodded, making a soft sound of understanding. “Yeah. I can definitely relate.”

“I think she wants me to succeed, though,” Adrien mumbled, explaining, “On the way out of class, she held me back and told me to do my best with the scene with Gilbert because out in the real world I’m going to be acting with people I don’t like and people who don’t like me. She said that sometimes I’d have to manufacture chemistry or comradery. Sometimes I’d have to kiss people I hated and really sell it that I was in love or play the role of the best friend of an actor I couldn’t stand and make the audience believe I would die for that person. She’s making this into a learning experience. …I kind of hate her for it.”

“Yeah,” Marinette hummed. “Whenever Gabriel does stuff like that to me, it always puts so much pressure on because I want to do a good job. Obviously, he thinks I can succeed, so I feel like there is no option to screw up. I don’t want to make him second guess his belief in me. I don’t want him to be disappointed.”

“Yeah,” Adrien sighed. “I don’t want to let her down, but…Gilbert and I couldn’t even agree on a scene to do. We spent the whole group time arguing. I tried to keep my cool and make compromises, but…it was just so frustrating and demoralizing. By the end of class I was thinking that maybe he was right and that I didn’t deserve to be there after all. I mean, maybe I’m not cut out for this if I’m so thin-skinned. Maybe I’m just wasting everyone’s time. Maybe I should—”

“—No, Adrien,” she cut him off firmly. “Stop. Seriously, what does this Gilbert guy know about anything?”

Adrien shrugged.

“And your professor? Don’t you think she knows what she’s talking about?” she challenged. “Our acting program is renown not just in Paris but across the country, across Europe. Don’t you think your professor knows talent when she sees it? Do you really think she could be wrong about having faith in you?”

Adrien was silent for a long stretch, considering her words before responding. “I see your point.”

“Good,” she snorted.

“Thank you,” he whispered, a slight smile starting to make his lips curve.

“Any time, Minou,” she replied with a chuckle, tussling his hair. “You’ll figure it out, Adrien. You really _are_ good at this. I’ve seen the videos online that your classmates leaked. You’re amazing, and you’re going to figure this out. I mean, maybe you two could do a fight scene or something where you’re yelling at one another where you could use the animosity between the two of you. Maybe you just have to think outside of the box a little.”

Adrien pulled back to stare down at Marinette in surprised awe.

Marinette blinked back at him in confusion. “What? What is it? Did I say something weird?”

He surged in and kissed her, hard and quick, in his excitement. “You are freaking amazing!” he trilled, elated. “You are brilliant and wonderful and-and…” Suddenly a thought occurred to him: “…and I should not have kissed you. Oh my gosh. I am so sorry!” he rushed to apologize. “I didn’t mean—!”

“—I-It’s okay!” she squeaked, heart beating in her ears as she mentally yelled at herself not to try to kiss him again. She buried her face in his chest to hide her blush, surprising him. “It’s not a big deal. Just…don’t do that again, okay? I’m…I’m glad I could help.”

Her hands found the spot behind his right ear, making him gasp as she distracted him completely.

He started to purr.

She could feel the vibrations in his chest against her cheek, and it was soothing.

They stayed like that for a minute or two, each trying to calm down, unsure of where they stood with the other, knowing the tempestuous nature of their relationship nowadays and how they could be bitter enemies one instant, devoted friends the next, and star-crossed lovers the second after that.

Adrien finally put a pause on the purring to ask, “Are we okay?”

Marinette really thought about the question. There were layers there. Were they okay? No. They were not okay. On the really good days, they could fall back into a pattern, resuming their roles as Ladybug and Chat Noir or Marinette and Chat Noir or Marinette and Adrien before the apocalypse, but then something would happen to remind them that they weren’t those people anymore, that something had changed between them, and then the illusion broke.

On moderately good days, they were awkward. They couldn’t read one another anymore. They were on shaky ground. Everything was always shifting. They occasionally managed to enact something on the verge of a real friendship, but it was fragile and ephemeral.

There was a reason why Adrien had asked her if they were friends that day.

On the bad days, they were hostile and antagonistic. They rubbed one another the wrong way, and one poorly-chosen word, one ill-interpreted facial expression was enough to start a fight.

And then there was the here and now where Marinette was lying in her boyfriend’s bed, curled up with her ex-(many things). He’d kissed her, and it had crossed all kinds of wires in her brain. The only thing stopping her from pulling him back into a kiss and then trying to get his clothes off was the fact that it would hurt Luka. There was no way that they wouldn’t be caught.

The fact that she was even thinking about physically cheating on her boyfriend on top of the emotional infidelity she already struggled with made her really sad. Marinette used to like herself, but, in recent months, she found that she wasn’t happy with the person she’d become.

She’d lost her center, her focus, her goals. She’d lost sight of her way.

“Yeah,” she whispered against his collarbone. “Don’t worry. We’re okay, Adrien.”

He breathed a sigh of relief. “Okay. Good. Thanks.”

“Mmhm,” she answered half-hearted.

He started to purr again as her fingers traced patterns against his scalp.

Luka made a point not to speed on the way home. He’d already totaled one bike two years prior, and motorcycles were too expensive to go around wrecking. Plus, there was no guarantee that he’d survive a second crash, and he figured that Marinette would rather wait ten more minutes and have him arrive safe and sound than have him rush and end up dead.

He tried to tell himself that Marinette would understand, that she would admire his dedication to helping his students, that it wasn’t such a big deal to keep your girlfriend waiting for an hour and fifteen minutes.

He may have gone a little faster than normal, practically jumped off the motorcycle, and tossed the helmet carelessly over his shoulder in favour of racing down below deck to beg forgiveness of the girl he loved.

“Marinette?” he called, heading for his bedroom when he didn’t find her in the main cabin. “Marinette?” he tried again as he opened his door, hoping she hadn’t gotten tired of waiting and left.

He stopped abruptly when he saw the blonde head of hair in his bed. He frowned. “Ariel?”

Adrien didn’t stir.

“Ariel,” he called softly, reaching out to gently pet Adrien’s hair.

Adrien drew in a large inhale and started to roll over.

It was then that Luka noticed that Adrien was not alone in bed.

Adrien blinked up sleepily, catching Luka’s hand and bringing it down to nuzzle it. “Hi, Orpheus.”

Marinette stretched, yawning as blinked her eyes open.

“Hi, Ariel,” Luka replied neutrally. “…Hi, Chanson.”

Marinette gasped, sitting up and pushing away from Adrien until she was pressed up against the wall, suddenly entirely awake. “L-L-Luka! This isn’t—! We weren’t—! This isn’t what it looks like!” she pleaded.

Adrien groaned, tugging on Luka’s hand, lacing his fingers through Luka’s. “We had bad days,” Adrien explained in a plaintive whine, “so we were snuggling until you got home to make us feel better. Come to bed, Orpheus. Snuggle with us.”

The rational, logical part of Luka’s brain shut off. The uneasiness he’d felt at finding the people he loved in bed together dissipated. He reasoned he could worry about what had happened between the two later. He was sure Adrien would fess up if pressed one-on-one. For the moment, none of that really mattered because he was being offered the opportunity to live out a personal fantasy that he’d been harboring for going on five years.

“I don’t know that there’s room for me,” Luka remarked, the irony of that statement not escaping him.

Adrien waved away Luka’s protest. “We’ll snuggle really close. Puppy pile.”

“What if Marinette isn’t comfortable with that?” Luka tried again.

Adrien willed both eyes open to look at Marinette questioningly. “Thoughts? Concerns?”

Marinette shook her head, a grenadine blush making itself at home on her cheeks. “I’d…I’d like to snuggle.”

“Perfect,” Adrien yawned, giving Luka’s hand a squeeze. “Shirt off, Hottie. Let’s see some skin.”

“Ariel,” Luka groaned, looking to Marinette for approval.

She smiled shyly, her cheeks darkening. “I’m okay with it, if you are.”

Luka nodded, giving Adrien’s hand a squeeze before he let go to slip off his plaid overshirt and the band t-shirt he was wearing underneath, maintaining eye contact with Marinette.

Adrien let out a low wolf whistle.

Luka smacked him lightly, his own cheeks starting to colour. “Scoot over, Ariel.”

Adrien snorted. “This is my side of the bed. You go in the middle.”

Luka sighed, pretending to be put out as he toed off his shoes and climbed over Adrien.

Luka was no sooner under the covers with them than Adrien wrapped himself around Luka’s right side, hooking his top leg over Luka’s.

Marinette laughed as Adrien began to purr. “He sure gets comfy quick.”

“He thinks he owns the place,” Luka chuckled fondly, giving Adrien’s hair a little nuzzle and wrapping his right arm around the slightly smaller young man.

“I _do_ own the place. And _you_,” Adrien snorted. “That’s what happens when you bring a cat home and feed it.”

“Uh-oh,” Marinette snickered. “Does that mean you own my room and me too?”

“Precisely,” Adrien hummed happily, rubbing his head against Luka like a real cat.

Luka rolled his eyes, opening his left arm to Marinette.

She smiled softly as she sidled up to him and settled in, resting her head on the other side of Luka’s chest.

“You both had bad days?” Luka prompted, expecting to have to make them take turns telling him about their problems.

“I don’t know about Adrien, but I think I’m good on talking about my day. I’m ready for snuggles,” Marinette replied.

“I think I have things squared away too,” Adrien mumbled. “Snuggles sound good.”

Marinette and Adrien quieted down after that, quickly drifting off back to dreamland.

That left Luka to contemplate whether he was already dreaming. There he was in bed with the two people he loved. There was no fighting, no guilt. Only peace, quiet…the brush of Marinette’s hair on Luka’s skin, light puffs of air against his neck as Adrien breathed in and out, the mingled scents of Adrien’s expensive shower products and Marinette’s strawberry shampoo and oatmeal bodywash. The heat of the both of them pressed to his sides, the warmth of their skin against his own.

It was maddening and perfect, and Luka never wanted it to end.

He wanted to go to bed like this every night and wake up like this each morning. He wanted to crystalize the moment and relive it over and over, thousands and thousands of times.

Eventually, his eyelids started to get heavy. He fought off drowsiness, but, inevitably, sleep claimed him in the end, filling his head with beautiful dreams where that perfect moment lasted a lifetime.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this started off as Lukadrien drabbles and kind of branched out from there to include Lukadrienette and then Lukanette, but how do we feel about Adrienette? ^.^ It was fun writing them again. 
> 
> (Confession: Masquerade ball accidental identity reveal anyone? The Instagrams plunnied me, so now I'm writing a Marichat/Adrienette one-shot. I've only gotten a little over one thousand words written, so I don't know where this is going or any kind of timetable on this, but it's called Paw de Deux. Would you believe no one else has used that title yet? At least no search results came up on AO3 when I tried it the other day. ^.^ Stay tuned for that if you miss my Marichat days.)
> 
> But did we like the chapter today? These two are such a mess. I like Adrien at the end smoothing things between the other two and telling Luka to just get in bed already. It kind of reminds me of that scene between Marinette, Luka, and Adrien in Phantasmagoria when Luka and Adrien run into Marinette when Luka is walking Adrien home and Luka smooth things over between Adrien and Marinette. I'll leave it up to you to decide how half-asleep/awake Adrien really is at the end.
> 
> A Translation Note: Meinu means "beautiful" in Chinese (as in, "Hello, Beautiful"). It literally uses the characters "pretty/beautiful" and "woman". Beau Gosse is "handsome kid". It's what Marinette calls Adrien in her voicemail in L'Imposteur/Copy Cat. I have appropriated it. ^.^ Also, "Chanson" means "song", as in the song that's been stuck in Luka's head from the moment he met Marinette. (Have we done that one already in Nachtmusik? There are so many nicknames I have to keep track of! XD)
> 
> In case anyone cared: Luka's previous motorcycle's name was Kelpie. His current bike is Dullahan, though he was thinking about naming it Leanan Sidhe in Adrien's honor. I have it in my head that Anarka's father is French and her mother is Scottish/Irish. Juleka and Luka were exposed to a lot of Irish and Scottish mythology from their nanna growing up. ...Incidentally, does anything come to mind at the mention of motorcycles and dullahans? ^.^ Just curious. If it doesn't come up in Jabberwocky, I'll write the scene for Nachtmusik.
> 
> So, in a comment on Chapter Nineteen, lucyluholmes had asked for Lukadrien fluff, adult Lukadrienette, and Adrien's sexuality. I don't know how I got "Adrienette now with Lukadrientte at the end" out of "adult Lukadrienette". :/ Like, I don't even. But Chapter Twenty-Three and Chapter Twenty-Four both contain Lukadrien fluff, and Twenty-Four has a bit of Adrien's sexuality, so...I hope you'll look forward to next time? (That really should be a declarative sentence and not an interrogative one. ^.^;)
> 
> Next chapter should be up on Monday, 12/02/2019, so I'll see you guys in December! (Unless you'll be joining me for the next chapter of Daisy on Friday. ^.^ Gosh, I'm not ready for this.)


	23. Sour Cream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Three Lukadrien vignettes concerning sour cream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! Sorry this is up a little later than usual. Thank you so much for your comments, bookmarks, and kudos last time! I'm so pleased that you guys enjoyed the Adrienette (and the Lukadrienette). It was really nice to be able to show Adrien and Marinette together. I really miss writing Adrienette fluff. ^.^; Ahem. Anyway.
> 
> Today we have three Lukadrien vignettes. The first one takes place the summer after Phantasmagoria probably in July when Adrien is sixteen and Luka is eighteen and a half. The second scene takes place after Jabberwocky Chapter Four (which takes place in August) on April thirtieth when Adrien is turning seventeen and Luka is nineteen and a half. The third scene takes place during The Seduction of Adrien Agreste (fairly far in, too. Let's call it late May-ish. I've yet to get my timeline pinned down exactly that far into the story. It's later than the other Seduction scenes in Nachtmusik) when Adrien is nineteen and Luka is twenty-one and a half. The third vignette contains suggestive themes and implied sexual content, but no sexual content is depicted.
> 
> Enjoy!

“I appreciate you so much,” Adrien moaned through a mouthful of sour cream.

Luka tried not to watch as Adrien’s tongue wrapped around the spoon, a blissful look on Adrien’s face. Luka took a deep breath and pressed a palm over his mouth to suppress an agonized moan of his own. He felt lightheaded; all the blood in his body was rushing south.

_“He’s straight. He’s straight. He’s f-ing straight, and he _trusts_ you, Luka Couffaine, so keep your mind out of your pants and your _FRIEND_ out of your fantasies…. God that_ tongue_…uh.”_

“Thank you for keeping your fridge stocked for us,” Adrien continued, smiling obliviously at Luka from where Adrien lounged on Luka’s bed. “You have got to let me pay you back for the cheese. I know Plagg eats a lot.”

“Do not,” Plagg snorted from where he was curled up on the pillow Adrien had claimed as “his”.

Adrien laughed sarcastically. “Do too.”

“I don’t eat as much as _you_ do,” Plagg retorted sullenly, in a foul mood because Luka had been out of Brie.

Adrien turned back to Luka and opened his mouth to elicit agreement when it dawned upon him that Luka was staring. “…Did I get some on my face?”

Thankfully, Adrien did, in fact, have sour cream at the corner of his mouth, so Luka was able to nod and point to the corresponding spot on his own cheek.

Unfortunately, Adrien used his tongue to clean up the wayward dollop of cream, sending Luka’s hormones into a flurry all over again.

Luka made a disgruntled noise.

Adrien raised an eyebrow, completely unaware of the power his tongue had over the other teen. “What was that?”

“Nothing,” Luka protested a little too quickly.

Adrien chuckled and shook his head, dismissing the episode. “Want some?” He scooped up a bite and held out the spoon to Luka.

Luka, in spite of himself, gravitated over to the bed, taking a seat next to Adrien.

“Say ‘aahh’,” Adrien coached.

Luka closed his eyes and opened his mouth, letting Adrien feed him, letting himself have this moment of indulgence.

He winced as the sour cream actually hit his tongue.

Adrien cackled in delight at the disgusted look on Luka’s face.

Luka tried not to choke as he forced himself to swallow. “That…” He coughed. “…is nasty. How can you eat that straight? Don’t you have a gag reflex?”

Adrien shrugged, happily spooning another bite of sour cream into his own mouth. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. This is delicious. I love the creamy texture. It’s just a little bit more tart than Greek yogurt, and I kind of like that. Greek yogurt is too sweet sometimes. Well…the plain Greek yogurt is good.”

Luka sighed, reaching out to tussle Adrien’s hair lovingly. “This is because no one feeds you sugar. If you had ice cream more than once a month, you would not be able to eat that sour stuff.”

Adrien shrugged again. “Why don’t you just get out the cookie dough, Orpheus?”

Juleka came into the main cabin to find Luka slumped on the couch.

His hair was in disarray, and he was clothed in pajamas he’d probably been wearing for a day or two now. He stared blankly into space as he ate spoonful after spoonful of sour cream straight out of the container.

“You’re up,” she observed. “…Have you been drinking again?”

He blinked a few times before his eyes registered her presence and focused on her. “The liquor cabinet is locked, and I gave the key to you to hide, so I don’t see how I could be drinking.”

Juleka shrugged, coming around to sit on the couch next to him. “Just checking.”

She didn’t dare bring up the fact that he could buy alcohol elsewhere (…if he ever went out). She didn’t want to put the idea into his head.

“That stuff is disgusting,” she remarked, indicating the half-empty sour cream container.

Luka nodded and took another bite, wincing as he did so.

“You’re going to make yourself sick.” Juleka reached for the container, trying to take it away.

He pulled back defensively.

She put her hands up in surrender. “Hey, okay. Suit yourself,” she snorted. “…Why are you eating that stuff?”

He shook his head.

She wanted to ask if it were an Adrien thing, but she didn’t want to poke that particular tiger in case it snapped her hand off and turned her brother back into a self-destructive, raging alcoholic again. Juleka never knew which buttons were okay to press anymore.

“Are you okay?” she asked instead.

Luka shook his head. “…Today is Adrien’s birthday. He’s seventeen….”

Juleka nodded. She wanted to groan and shake him and tell him that it had been eight freaking months, but…

He turned his head and looked at her urgently. “How is he? Is he okay? Do you see him very often? I was thinking maybe I could give him a gift…maybe a recording on a CD or some new tracks on a flash drive or something. Something small that you or Rose could sneak him, but…”

Juleka shook her head sadly. “We’re in different classes this year. I don’t see him much, and, when I do, it’s from a distance. I get the impression he’s avoiding us.”

Luka nodded slowly, the animation draining from his face. He took another bite of the sour cream and winced.

She placed her hand over his, stilling it. “Luc, please stop. You’re going to make yourself sick.”

With a sigh, he set down the container and the spoon.

She picked them up, taking them over to the sink where she rinsed out the rest of the sour cream, washed the spoon, and tossed the container in the recycle bin.

Luka went back to staring absently at the far wall.

Juleka sighed, going back over to sit by her brother. “Hey.”

She tapped her knee against his.

“Why don’t you play your violin?” she suggested, indicating the instrument on the seat of the couch beside Luka.

He shrugged, picked up the violin and bow, and brought them into position like an automaton. He started to play [Saint-Saëns’s Introduction and Rondo Capriccioso](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hCsB3WtlyaM), imagining Adrien playing the missing piano part.

To Juleka, the plaintive wails of the violin sounded like a swan crying in vain for its lost mate.

Tears welled up in her eyes for her brother and the palpable weight of his suffering.

Silently, she hoped Adrien was having the day from hell for what he had done to Luka.

“_Fiiiifth_, come back to beeeed,” Luka groaned.

“_Fiiiiirst_,” Adrien echoed. “I am _starving_. Do you know how many calories we just burned? I feel faint.”

Luka rolled his eyes. “Are you really hungry, or do you just want to eat sour cream? Because if you’re actually hungry, I’ll make you dinner…despite the fact that it’s nearly midnight.”

Adrien shrugged, fishing a spoon out of Luka’s desk drawer.

Luka eyed his lover hungrily as Adrien bent over.

“I kind of just want to eat sour cream,” Adrien confessed. “Making food would involve showering and putting clothes on because I don’t think the Capitaine and your sisters would appreciate us using the kitchen naked.”

Luka covered his face with both his hands and moaned.

“What?” Adrien snickered.

“I’m imagining you prancing around the kitchen of our future apartment wearing only an apron,” Luka confessed.

Adrien hummed appreciatively. “I want a house. No upstairs or downstairs neighbors to complain that we’re too loud…and I don’t just mean your instruments.”

“God,” Luka hissed. “Please come back to bed. You’re killing me.”

“Yeah?” Adrien chuckled sadistically, taking his time sauntering over to sit on the bed beside Luka.

“_Yeah_,” Luka breathed, rolling over onto his side to press airy kisses along Adrien’s hip and leg.

Adrien took a bite of sour cream, smirking around the spoon. “Goodness. Look at what a mess you are.”

“Adrien,” Luka whimpered, reaching out to trail fingers slowly down along the inside of Adrien’s thigh.

A soft purr began to rumble in Adrien’s chest.

“No,” he chuckled, reveling in Luka’s ardent want. It was good to be wanted, needed. “I’m eating. You’ll have to wait.”

“Nooooo,” Luka whined, hand slipping between Adrien’s legs. “_Now_.”

Adrien gasped, beginning to change his mind about the sour cream. “Well…” he replied levelly for appearance’s sake. “I guess I could draw all over your body with sour cream and then lick it off, if you really can’t wait.”

Luka paused, looking up curiously. “…Serious offer?”

Adrien thought about it. “Uh…well…I mean…other people lick whipped cream off of one another, don’t they? I don’t see why we couldn’t use sour cream. It’s probably going to get your sheets dirty, though.”

“Dirtier,” Luka corrected with an ironic laugh.

Adrien looked down at the spots already starting to dry on the bedding. “Yeah, okay,” he agreed. “Dirtier.”

“Do it,” Luka begged, and Adrien spent the next twenty minutes finger painting with sour cream, using Luka’s body as his canvas and cleaning it all up with his tongue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, which vignette was your favourite? I kind of like two. Am I a sadist? ^.^;
> 
> Does anyone else enjoying eating sour cream straight? ^.^; There have got to be other people out there. I also like plain Greek yogurt. There. Now you all know I'm weird.
> 
> Would now be a good time to explain the "First"/"Third"/"Fifth" nicknames? I mean, you already know Perfect Fifth (or here's the Wikipedia article if you want to refresh your memory: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Perfect_fifth ), and I'm assuming that you've guessed that the nicknames are a music thing. In Luka's mind, Luka, Marinette, and Adrien make up a C major chord. Luka is C (the first), Marinette is E (the third), and Adrien is G (the fifth). Each of the pairings can stand on their own, but they don't really reach their full potential until they're all three together. Luka and Marinette (C and E) are a major third; Marinette and Adrien (E and G) are a minor third; and Luka and Adrien (C and G) are a perfect fifth. All together, they make a C major chord (CEG). If you have access to a keyboard/piano/keyboard app, try out the different combinations and see how they sound. I fiddle around on my keyboard a lot when I'm coming up with music metaphors for writing or trying to describe something musical in my stories.
> 
> It might be worth mentioning that even as Adrien calls Luka "First", he doesn't get that they're a chord with Marinette. He just knows that he himself is Luka's perfect fifth, so Luka has to be the "one" (or "first") to Adrien's "five".
> 
> Thanks for reading, guys! I'll see you again on Thursday, 12/05/2019.
> 
> References:  
Saint-Saëns: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hCsB3WtlyaM


	24. Deku Palace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Luka agrees to try playing video games with Adrien.  
Adrien pushes boundaries.  
The boys have a sleepover.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone! Happy Thursday! A special thank you to everyone who's shown their support by commenting on the chapters, leaving kudos, or bookmarking the story to share with others. I appreciate you guys! It's a joy to share my writings with you. ^.^
> 
> This chapter takes place during Jabberwocky in November, a couple weeks after the events of Chapters Twelve, Thirteen, and Fourteen. Adrien is eighteen and a half, and Luka is twenty-one. This chapter contains suggestive themes and implied, off-screen masturbation, but there are NOT descriptions of sexual content.
> 
> Enjoy!

“So, I know the other week you said that you didn’t play video games,” Adrien led in, rolling over onto his stomach on his bed and switching the phone to his left ear. “But is that, like, a hard no, you’re not interested in video games at all or…? I mean, I know Marinette gets you to play Mecha Strike with her sometimes, but she said you’re pretty bad and don’t really seem to care for it, so I was wondering if you just didn’t like video games period or if it were just fighting games you weren’t interested in or…?”

Luka took a deep breath and set down his [clàrsach](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ON8xHpQWq34).

“Why’d you stop playing?” Adrien wondered, suddenly worried.

“Because I’m concentrating on talking to you,” Luka replied gently. “Look. Don’t feel bad.”

“I’m already starting to feel bad,” Adrien sighed.

“Ariel,” Luka chuckled, chiding, “Stop.”

Adrien made a disgruntled noise.

“The reason I’m not too big on video games is because when I was growing up, it was too expensive,” Luka explained patiently.

Adrien’s eyes widened. “O-Oh.”

Luka nodded. “I know it’s cheaper now. Marinette is always talking about PC games she picks up for a couple euros here and there, but when we were little, video games were for kids whose parents had money. I mean, do you know how much an N64 or a GameCube or a PlayStation or an Xbox cost? And then each game was upwards of fifty euros.”

“Oh,” Adrien repeated hollowly.

“We’ve never been in need of anything,” Luka assured, “but video games were out of our price range. I never had games growing up, so that’s why I’ve never really been into them. It was never a big deal, though, so don’t worry about it.”

“I never even considered the price,” Adrien mumbled, feeling thoughtless and, not for the first time, ashamed of his wealth. There were several dozen games he had never even taken out of the packaging languishing on his shelves.

“Because you’ve never _had_ to think about price,” Luka chuckled fondly. “Seriously, Adrien, don’t worry about it. I swear it wasn’t a big deal, and this is nothing you need to feel bad about. It’s not your fault that your family has money and mine doesn’t.”

“You never felt resentful of the kids who could play video games?” Adrien inquired in a small voice.

“No,” Luka assured. “I was more interested in music. Like I told you before: there were other things I’d rather be doing with my hands.”

“What about now?” Adrien prompted. “Do you ever hear Marinette talking about a game and think that that would be something you’d be interested in?”

Luka thought about it for a moment before giving his answer. “Yeah. I guess. There are some games that sound cool. I don’t know that I would go out on my own and play them, but there are games that sound interesting.”

“So…you wouldn’t be opposed to playing a game with me?” Adrien baited.

“With you? No, I wouldn’t be opposed. What kind of game did you have in mind?” Luka wondered.

Adrien pushed himself up to sitting as his voice jumped an octave in excitement. “It’s a series I’ve mentioned before. The Legend of Zelda?”

“Yeah. I remember you talking about it,” Luka encouraged.

“Well, Majora’s Mask is my absolute favourite game in the series. Like, it’s one of the best video games of _all_ _time_. The story, the music, the gameplay!” Adrien gushed. “The _music_! All the Zelda games have gorgeous music, but…the [Deku Palace](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2foI62hzyQ8&list=PLC675B851A38C9C2F&index=45)…the [inverted Stone Tower Temple](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_J9VlNOmJY)…[Clock Town](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JaflMqvxIqA&list=PLC675B851A38C9C2F&index=8)… There are so many great pieces. You should play the game just for the music alone.”

“And that’s the game you want to play together?” Luka chuckled at Adrien’s enthusiasm.

Adrien slammed the brakes on to ask tentatively, “If that’s okay?”

“If it’s something you enjoy, I’m more than happy to give it a try,” Luka answered honestly. “At the very least, I’m sure I’ll enjoy the music and spending time with you.”

“The music is phenomenal!” Adrien asserted. “I mean, the sound is a little video game-y, but I’ve heard the pieces played on piano and violin and by orchestras and musical groups, and they take the pieces to the next level. Actually, there’s this one group I think you’d really like. They’re called Theophony, and they’ve done some of the most jaw-dropping renderings of the Majora’s Mask music.”

“Yeah?” Luka prompted, drawing a knee into his chest.

“Yes. I’ll have to send you a link to one of my favourite pieces. What they’ve done is genius. I really think—” Adrien suddenly ground to a halt again. “—am I blathering at you? I’m not boring you, am I?”

“No, Ariel,” Luka assured. “You’re fine. I’m interested. Really. Send me the link, and I’ll listen to it, and then we can talk about it.”

Adrien blinked. “Now?”

“Sure,” Luka chuckled. “Why not?”

“Okay. I’ll text you [the link to Deku Palace by Theophany](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4r9S2yEiuME). Call me back when you finish listening to it, okay?”

“Will do,” Luka affirmed.

They rang off, and Adrien sent the text.

“You’re fidgeting,” Plagg observed from over on the desk where he and Nooroo were playing gin rummy with a pack of miniature cards that Gabriel had ordered for them.

“I’m not,” Adrien grumbled, coming over to sit in his desk chair and spin.

“He simply wants his lover to enjoy the musical sampling that he himself enjoys. It’s just nerves,” Nooroo reasoned, setting his cards aside to go land on Adrien’s right shoulder. “There, there, Adrien-bocchama. I’m sure Monsieur Couffaine will appreciate the piece,” he soothed, gently stroking Adrien’s cheek.

“Thanks,” Adrien sighed. “I just…I want him to be excited about it too. This game and this music are important to me. I played it a lot when I was little, but…after my mom first disappeared, I played it a lot then too, and…it felt like it helped. The game repeats on a three-day cycle, so you always know where people are going to be at any given time, what they’re going to be doing, what’s going to happen next. It was comforting when nothing in my life was happening on schedule and I didn’t know where people were and I never knew what was going to happen to me next, so…I don’t know.” Adrien shook his head and stopped the chair from spinning.

Nooroo hummed as he considered his young master. “If you’re feeling uneasy, Adrien-bocchama, perhaps you should go to Monsieur Couffaine. He always makes you feel better.”

Plagg gave a snort, setting down his own cards to float over to Adrien’s left shoulder. “I feel like he should learn to regulate his own emotions without relying on Snake-Boy all the time. He’s not even that upset. He’s just antsy because of that gala that he’s going to see Pigtails at tomorrow night.”

Adrien sighed, sinking down in the chair. “Yes, please remind me of the reason I couldn’t sleep and called Luka in the first place.”

“Hush, Plagg,” Nooroo hissed, wings fluttering in irritation. “I think he should go see Monsieur Couffaine because he sleeps better in Monsieur Couffaine’s bed. Adrien-bocchama will be better rested for tomorrow’s gala and facing Miss Dupain-Cheng in an evening gown if he goes to Monsieur Couffaine.”

“Or they could finally start kissing and be up all night,” Plagg argued.

Adrien groaned, covering his face with both hands. “Don’t put ideas in my head.”

“I don’t see why that would be bad,” Nooroo countered. “The hormones released by romantic activities would help Adrien-bocchama relax.”

“You’re not thinking about the other repercussions of them playing tonsil hockey,” Plagg accused.

Adrien groaned again pointedly. “Do we have to talk about this?”

“They’re in love,” Nooroo retorted. “What else matters? The sooner Monsieur Couffaine leaves Miss Dupain-Cheng and marries Adrien-bocchama, the better.” The butterfly kwami gave a nod of conviction.

“You are a delusional romantic,” Plagg grumbled, pointing a paw accusatorially at Nooroo. To do this, he had to lean comically to see Nooroo around Adrien’s neck.

“Why?” Nooroo whined. “Two men can get married nowadays. It isn’t something they can imprison or execute you for anymore. Why am I delusional? You’ve seen them together more than I have. Monsieur Couffaine and Adrien-bocchama are going to fall into each other’s arms eventually. It’s only a matter of time.”

“Okay. Enough,” Adrien sighed, plucking the kwamis off of his shoulders and gently returning them to the desk and their card game.

He trudged back to his bed and flopped onto it, face first.

“Now look what you’ve done,” Plagg accused, jabbing Nooroo in the arm.

“I blame _you_,” Nooroo hissed, picking up his cards with a renewed determination to beat Plagg.

Minutes passed, kwamis grumbled at one another, but Adrien’s phone did not ring.

Adrien picked up the device and stared at it expectantly.

Almost fifteen minutes had expired: enough time for Luka to have listened to the track twice.

Adrien rolled around in bed impatiently, gazing longingly at his phone and sighing intermittently.

“Please just call him already,” Plagg urged. “He probably loves it and has gotten caught up in making an arrangement for guitar or something.”

Adrien chuckled softly. “Yeah. That sounds like him, all right.”

Luka’s first words when he picked up the phone were, “I am so sorry, Angel. The Deku Palace piece was sensational, and then the next video started playing, and it was amazing too, and then I discovered that there are two whole albums! I _love_ this. I would love to see the source material.”

Adrien laughed, shaking his head. “You’re such a dork. I love how your mind works.”

“Y-Yeah?” Luka gulped, caught by surprise by the compliment.

“Yeah,” Adrien stressed.

Luka’s cheeks burned in pleasure. “You don’t think I’m annoying? The hyper-focus and my easily distracted tendencies get on some people’s nerves.”

Adrien shook his head. “I _love_ your passion. The way you get totally absorbed in things is cute.”

Luka chuckled, glad that Adrien couldn’t see how red his cheeks were. “I’ll remind you that you said that the first time you get ticked at me for getting caught up in arranging a piece and being late because of it.”

“I can be annoyed and smitten at the same time,” Adrien countered. “That’s part of really loving someone…embracing everything about them…the good and the bad. For better or worse. I adore even the annoying things about you.”

Luka drew in a long breath, waiting for Adrien to take it back.

“…I can’t sleep,” Adrien confessed in a tired murmur. “Would you come over?”

“I…I don’t know if I should,” Luka responded as he swallowed hard around his heavy tongue. He knew it was only a matter of time before Adrien said something like that to Luka’s face and Luka ended up kissing him. They were precariously perched on the edge of a very treacherous ledge.

“Please?” Adrien pressed, not even exerting much effort.

Luka’s resolve broke. He didn’t want to fight it.

“I’ll be good,” Adrien promised.

“Seventy-five percent platonic?” Luka snickered teasingly.

Adrien clicked his tongue. “Maybe more like fifty. I’m in a handsy mood, so I’m probably going to have my arms around you all night,” he informed honestly. “But we could snuggle on my couch and play Majora’s Mask until we got tired enough to sleep. My bed is super comfy…and in the morning we could get breakfast in bed from room service. What do you say?”

Luka bit his lip. “Adrien,” he sighed, voice filled with longing. “That sounds…honestly? Perfect. That sounds perfect…”

“But?” Adrien prompted.

Luka ran a hand through his hair before bringing it down to scrub at his face in frustration. “I really shouldn’t. I…That’s the kind of thing you’re supposed to do with your girlfriend. I love you, Adrien, but you are not my girlfriend.”

“No,” Adrien agreed docilely. “I’m your _lover_. And snuggling at all hours and getting breakfast in bed is exactly the kind of thing you do with a lover…right?”

Luka drew in a sharp breath and covered his mouth to keep from letting out a string of obscenities.

The worst thing about it was that Adrien was right. There had been no defining the relationship talk. They had never personally used the label before, but…Adrien had been Luka’s lover for several months at that point. Saying it out loud just made it a little too real for Luka.

He was a cheater. He had a lover. He was sneaking around behind his girlfriend’s back with her friend, and…and he loved them both. The thought of losing what he had with either one of them was unbearable. He was stuck.

“Luka?” Adrien called tentatively, beginning to get a little nervous.

“Okay,” Luka let out in a shuddering sigh of defeat.

“Okay?” Adrien confirmed.

“Okay,” Luka repeated. “I’ll come over and play video games and snuggle. _Just_ snuggling, Ariel. I can’t-can’t…I _can’t_…”

“Shhh,” Adrien soothed. “It’s alright. I know. No kissing. No hands in inappropriate places. No nudity. I know. I promise. Fifty percent platonic.”

“…I’m uncomfortable with how that number keeps dropping,” Luka groaned.

“Don’t worry about it,” Adrien instructed dismissively. “You’ll forget all about being uncomfortable the second you see me.”

“That in and of itself is problematic,” Luka muttered sourly.

“We’re not going to do anything wrong,” Adrien insisted, a whine sneaking into his voice. “It’s just snuggling. We do that _in front of_ Marinette, and she doesn’t have a problem with it.”

“She has no clue what’s going on between us,” Luka rebutted.

Adrien rolled his eyes. “She knows I have a crush on you. To be fair, she just thinks I like attention and have imprinted onto you because you give it to me, but…”

“If she knew what was really going on, she wouldn’t be so comfortable with this,” Luka snorted.

“Maybe not, but that’s her problem,” Adrien decreed, giving a toss of his head. “For now, you should hurry up and pack an overnight bag. I’ll be there to pick you up in, like, ten minutes, and, then, I promise you, I’ll make you forget about all the complicated stuff.”

“I should be more concerned that you have the power to do that,” Luka sighed, mentally chiding himself.

“See you in ten, Orpheus,” Adrien giggled. “I looooove you.”

“I love you too, Siren,” Luka hissed, ending the call, frustrated with himself and with Adrien’s ability to turn Luka’s insides to mush.

Swallowtail arrived ten minutes later, as promised.

As usual, Luka lost the ability to breathe for a minute when he saw the hero. “I thought angels had white bird wings.”

“Butterfly wings are prettier,” Swallowtail reasoned, his wings giving a vain flutter. “Ready to go?”

Luka slung his bag over his shoulder and nodded.

Swallowtail grinned as he took Luka’s hand and tugged the unresisting musician up to the deck. He scooped Luka into his arms, delighting as Luka gasped and instinctively wrapped his arms around Swallowtail’s neck.

Swallowtail laughed, and the sound put Luka at ease. It was still Adrien’s laugh. Chat Noir, Swallowtail, and Adrien all had the same, bell-like laugh.

“Ready?” Swallowtail chuckled gently.

Luka licked his lips. “Yeah.”

Swallowtail purposefully took the long way home.

They played The Legend of Zelda Majora’s Mask through the first three-day-cycle and made it all the way to the Deku Palace before they decided to call it quits for the night at around four AM.

“Come on,” Luka commanded. “Off. You’re falling asleep. It’s time to go to bed.”

Adrien gave a little grumble, squeezing tighter from where he sat draped around Luka from behind. “But I like having you between my legs,” he teased, nearly sending Luka into cardiac arrest.

Luka cursed, clamping a hand over his mouth and trying to breath through the ache and the longing Adrien ignited in him. “…Please don’t tease me like that,” he whimpered. “You have no idea how bad I want you inside of me and how much it hurts knowing that that’s never going to happen.”

“Oh, Pretty Boy,” Adrien breathed, voice filled with horror and regret at his own carelessness. He unfolded himself from around Luka and came to sit on the couch beside him, caressing and nuzzling his face, cupping his cheek. “I’m sorry,” he whispered over and over before pulling back to look Luka in the eye. “You know I would never do anything to hurt you on purpose.”

Luka nodded. “I know you never do it on purpose.”

“…But that doesn’t mean that I don’t hurt you,” Adrien sighed, dropping his hands to grasp Luka’s and gently tugging Luka to his feet and over towards the bathroom. “Come on. Time to get ready for bed. You can have the bathroom first.”

Adrien paused them in front of the door, looking back up into Luka’s eyes intently. “You do know that you have my express permission to fantasize about me doing and saying anything you want, any time you want…right?”

Luka’s cheeks burned like a wildfire. “But…you don’t _want_ to do those kinds of things. That would be…I wouldn’t want to—”

Adrien’s hand slid to the small of Luka’s back and pulled Luka in. “—Shhh,” Adrien instructed as he put a finger to Luka’s lips. “I want to want to do those kinds of things. I _want_ to do whatever makes you happy.” Adrien’s voice slipped deliciously low. “Do us both a favour, and pretend that I make you very, _very_ happy…okay?”

Luka gulped and nodded.

Before Luka could react, Adrien leaned in and placed a sloppy lick across Luka’s lips, from one cheek to the other.

“What?” Adrien chuckled sheepishly. “We agreed no kissing. Licking was never forbidden.” He winked, pulling away with a cheeky grin. “Take your time in there. I like to do a thorough job of everything I do, so if you’re imagining me, I’d rather you be accurate.”

Luka groaned as he retreated to the bathroom.

Adrien put away the N64 and controller and quickly cleaned up their snacks before changing into his pajamas and collapsing onto his bed to groan into his pillow.

He listened to the sounds of the shower running and wondered what Luka was thinking about. What did Luka want from Adrien? What did Luka want in a partner? Adrien doubted he’d ever be able to be an enthusiastic participant in Luka’s ideal scenarios, but there had to be _something_ Adrien could do. He wasn’t completely asexual. He just…

He listened to the sound of the shower and tried imagining Luka naked, pupils dilated, skin flushed, chest heaving. Above the waist, this was a pretty picture. Adrien was very interested in pinning Luka up against a wall and kissing the breath out of him. Unfortunately, this mental exercise did nothing to stimulate Adrien’s lower half.

Adrien groaned into the pillow.

He had the fleeting idea to take his clothes off and walk in on Luka and force him to kiss Adrien and then…and then…what? See if kissing a naked man and rolling around under the spray of the scalding shower on the cold tile floor did anything for him?

Best case scenario: something would happen and Luka would break up with Marinette to start dating Adrien and they’d live happily ever after.

Worst case scenario: Adrien would freak out, nothing would happen, Luka would be upset at the breach of trust and the breaking of the mostly unspoken rules that they were both carefully following to keep things between them on the right side of “disaster”.

Then again, something could happen and Luka could feel guilty and break things off entirely with Adrien in order to stay faithful to Marinette. Or something could happen and not be very good and Luka could become bored with Adrien and disillusioned and…

Adrien sat up to press the heels of his palms into his eyes to stop the tears.

Why did he have to be such a mess all the time?

He should just leave Fantasy Adrien to take care of Luka. Fantasy Adrien wouldn’t screw things up.

Adrien made himself take deep breaths and concentrate on comforting, happy thoughts: wrapping around Luka, playing video games together, snuggling, laughter…the way Marinette had smiled at him the other day as their hands brushed…the pain au chocolat that Marinette had brought to class to share with him…hanging out with Marinette, Alya, and Nino like old times…eating dinner at the Couffaines’ with Luka, Anarka, Rose, and Juleka and feeling like everyone wanted him there…

“Adrien?” Luka called a fourth time as he sat down on the bed beside Adrien, running a shower-warmed hand through Adrien’s hair. “You okay, Angel? Why are you crying?”

Adrien snapped back to the present, eyes fluttering open at Luka’s touch. “I…” He briefly considered lying, but he could still feel teardrops on his eyelashes. Luka’s face was a little more than a handspan away, and Adrien had no doubt that Luka could see the remnants of tears.

Adrien smiled sheepishly. “Sorry. It’s nothing, I promise. Really. I’m just thinking too much.”

Luka opened his mouth to press, but Adrien cut him off with a seductive smile. “So how was your shower? I trust that my performance was satisfactory?”

Luka’s face went crimson as he choked on air. “You were superb. Thanks.”

Adrien smirked. “Care to recount our exploits?”

Luka choked again, swatting at Adrien. “_You_ are trying to distract me from the fact that you were crying.”

“_I_ am trying to learn how to be a better lover,” Adrien refuted. “Come on.” He slipped his hand into Luka’s, interlacing their fingers. “Teach me how to please you.”

Luka sighed, pulling his hand away and turning to stare down Adrien.

Adrien arched an eyebrow…and then gasped as Luka pushed him down on the bed, pinning one of his wrists above his head. Adrien gazed up at Luka curiously as Luka loomed over him.

“…You’re not freaking out,” Luka observed.

“Why would I be freaking out?” Adrien chuckled at the absurdity.

Luka rolled his eyes. “I’m pinning you down on a bed?”

Adrien shrugged. “So? It’s not like you’re going to do anything I don’t want you to.”

“You have a lot of faith in me,” Luka mumbled.

Adrien reached up with his free hand to cup Luka’s cheek. “Orpheus, I have faith in you for good reason. What is all this about?”

Luka shook his head, rolling off of Adrien. “You…You just trust me too much, is all. I’m a little worried that one day, if we keep going like this, you’re going to push me over the edge, and I’m going to go too far, and…”

Adrien didn’t bother getting up. “And everything will break?”

Luka nodded. “I want everything, and I’m scared of getting nothing,” he muttered, thinking about Marinette as well as Adrien.

“It sounds like _you’ve_ been thinking too much too,” Adrien hummed. “Does getting off usually make you introspective like this, or is this a four AM thing?”

Luka sighed heavily. “I think this is a you-four-AM-getting-off thing.”

Adrien gave a snorted laugh. “Well. Good thing that there are twenty-three other hours of the day to pick from. I’m sure Fantasy Adrien would be happy to get you off during any of the others.”

Luka fell onto his back on the bed laughing and rolled over to face Adrien. He shook his head and reached out to stroke Adrien’s cheek. “I love you.”

Adrien grabbed Luka’s hand and brought it down to his lips to nuzzle and nibble on. “I love you too,” he mumbled around Luka’s fingers.

“…Tell me why you were crying?” Luka tried again.

Adrien paused with a finger between his teeth to consider. He decided to confide a different truth.

He released Luka’s hand, met Luka’s gaze, and confessed, “The reason I called you tonight…the reason I couldn’t sleep in the first place…tomorrow—or, I guess it’s _tonight_ now, but—the gala.”

Luka stiffened, inhaling audibly. “Oh.”

“You and Marinette are going to be there. As a couple…and I don’t…” He shook his head. “It’s going to be like my parents’ wedding again, but it’ll be different because I won’t have all my friends there to support me, and I’m going to make a fool of myself in public, and I wish I didn’t have to go, to see her in the dress she designed, dancing with you in the suit she designed, and…I don’t want to be reminded that she’s not mine and neither are you. So, yeah. I was crying. I told you it was stupid.”

Luka reached out, wrapping his arms around Adrien and pulling him in. “Shhhh, My Love. I think we all feel that way about one another.”

Adrien pushed back enough to frown in confusion. “What do you mean?”

“All of our hearts are divided,” Luka explained. “I’m not _just_ yours in the same way that _you_ aren’t just mine…the same way that Marinette’s heart is divided between the two of us. You’re not the only one who feels like he doesn’t have anyone to himself.”

“…Oh,” Adrien answered softly. “I hadn’t thought about it like that. I…but…but _you’re_ the one in the relationship with her. It’s you two who are the real couple. For all that Marinette cares for me, we’re never going to be a couple. We’re never going to…” His voice broke, and he buried his face in Luka’s chest. “Sorry,” he whispered against Luka’s skin.

“It’s okay,” Luka whispered back. “Just…know that even though I’m the one in an official relationship, I still feel a similar pain to yours. I don’t really hold out much hope of ever having either one of you.”

Adrien’s grip around Luka tightened. “Let’s talk about something happy. I’m tired of being sad.”

“Okay,” Luka easily agreed, lifting a hand to run through Adrien’s hair. “Even though we don’t know what the future has in store, can we be happy that we have this present moment? Can we be happy that we’re together right now? That no one’s keeping us apart?”

Adrien nodded and then scooted up in Luka’s embrace to touch his forehead to Luka’s. “That you love me,” he added, “and that, even though I’m not bi, I’m still queer enough to love you back.”

“Yeeeesss,” Luka hissed happily. “That I’m in your bed and you’re in my arms.”

“That Fantasy Adrien is good in bed?” Adrien added interrogatively.

Luka laughed, giving Adrien a squeeze. “Don’t you ever doubt it. Second best sex ever.”

Adrien frowned. “Who’s number one?”

“That backrub you gave me a couple weeks ago,” Luka snickered, leaning in to nip Adrien’s ear. “And that song you wrote about me.”

“Oh,” Adrien replied dumbly. “Well. That’s okay then,” he decided, making a mental note to compose more songs for Luka, as that was clearly the way to his heart and far more a big deal than Adrien had realized at the time.

“…Are you happy now, or should we keep going?” Luka inquired, giving Adrien’s forehead a nuzzle.

“I could go for some more pillow talk,” Adrien chuckled with a mischievous grin.

Luka rolled his eyes. “Tease.”

“Excuse you,” Adrien snorted. “Where are you right now? Who sleeps in your bed at least two nights a week? Which one of us put a moratorium on kissing? Who is the tease in this relationship?”

“I guess we both are,” Luka laughed softly. “…Want to get under the covers?”

“All right,” Adrien sighed, nuzzling Luka back before reluctantly breaking away.

“I’m guessing you have a preferred side?” Luka inquired, sitting up and getting off the bed so that Adrien could turn the sheets down.

“Yep. Left side is mine,” he indicated the side closer to the skate ramp. “Right side is Plagg’s.” He pointed out the side closer to the desk. “Except for a little patch we’ve set aside for Nooroo. Plagg was hard pressed to give it up. Nooroo is allowed to sleep on my side when he wants, though, but I just thought he should have his own space too. You know, so he’d feel more at home.”

“You’re beyond sweet,” Luka chuckled. “Where are Plagg and Nooroo?”

“Sock drawer,” Plagg called out. “Covering our ears and singing ‘la, la, la’ and pretending we don’t exist.”

“I’m eavesdropping,” Nooroo announced proudly.

Luka burst out laughing. “I bet we’re better than a soap opera.”

“The adjective you’re looking for is ‘worse’,” Plagg supplied sulkily. “Kiss already.”

“Shut up, Plagg,” Adrien called in a singsong before turning to Luka and catching his hand. “Ignore the kwamis; come to bed with me.”

“Just tell me where you want me.” Luka easily acquiesced.

“You share my side with me,” Adrien instructed. “You get in first. Just pretend that the center of the bed dividing my side and Plagg’s is like the wall your bed is up against.”

“Can do,” Luka assured, climbing under the covers.

“Adrien, don’t you dare let him use my pillow!” Plagg groused.

“We’re not using your pillow, Plagg!” Adrien called back, shaking his head. “I got out extra.” To Luka, he whispered, “So high maintenance.”

“I heard that!” Plagg snapped.

Adrien only laughed, sidling up next to Luka and smiling brilliantly.

Luka smiled dreamily back.

Adrien leaned in, and Luka startled.

“Adrien, no kissing,” he reminded.

“No kissing,” Adrien confirmed, still leaning in.

“Adrien,” Luka warned.

“Shh,” Adrien coaxed. “It’s okay. I’m your lover. We’re not doing anything wrong.”

“Adrien,” Luka whined plaintively.

“You should close your mouth,” Adrien suggested. “Otherwise, we’re going to have problems.” He closed the distance, placing a long, slow lick across Luka’s lips.

Luka let out a muffled moan, trembling as he fought to keep his mouth closed.

“Ariel,” he groaned after Adrien had pulled away. “You can’t keep doing that. You have to stop. No more licking.”

“But I want to kiss you,” Adrien pouted.

“And you think I don’t?” Luka sighed. “Adrien, I can’t. I can’t do this.”

Adrien bit his lip. He wanted to argue that they were _already_ doing this, so why not take things to their logical conclusion? …But he got the impression that that would only make Luka go into a crisis of downwardly spiraling guilt.

“Okay,” Adrien reluctantly agreed, giving Luka a loving peck just to the side of his eye. “Pillow talk, then.”

“Okay,” Luka sighed, resting his head on Adrien’s chest.

“Sorry for pushing your boundaries,” Adrien muttered into Luka’s hair, bringing a hand up to meander through teal locks. “You know why I do it, don’t you?”

Luka nodded, letting his eyes slide shut. “You want more. You want me to be yours.”

“…Do you ever get tired of all the drama I cause? All the angst and all the anxiety and all the disappointments and guilt?” Adrien wondered.

“All of those things? Yes,” Luka confirmed, rushing to follow the statement up with, “But never of you. You make all of that worth it.”

“You say the sweetest things,” Adrien chuckled. “I like pillow talk.”

“Good. There’s more where that came from,” Luka mumbled sleepily.

The next fifteen minutes were a blur of soppy, sappy purple prose exchanged in half-intelligible French. At one point, Luka slipped into Russian to recite [a poem by Pushkin](https://www.oxfordlieder.co.uk/song/2093) for Adrien about falling in love, being separated, and finding one another again.

“You’re my ‘genius of pure beauty’, P5,” Luka whispered as they drifted off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you may have guessed, this is the alternate version of Chapter Twelve...only not. -.-; It was supposed to be. This is NOT how I intended this to go, but...I hope you enjoyed it anyway? Adrien kind of pushed everything off the edge of the cliff, and this is what we ended up with.
> 
> Chapter Title Song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4r9S2yEiuME
> 
> By the way, as a reminder, I have Luka studying Russian Literature in uni, so that's why he has Pushkin poems memorized in Russian. Luka has actually learned Russian so as to read the originals. Incidentally, Adrien speaks some Russian because his bodyguard Victor (originally Viktor, but he spells it the French way in France) is Russian. This is why Victor doesn't speak much. He understands French just fine, but he's self-conscious about his accent and doesn't always have faith in his speaking abilities, especially in front of (xenophobic) Gabriel who has no patience. Adrien, the little polyglot, has learned some Russian, and Victor and Adrien often converse in Russian together. Adrien doesn't read Russian, though. Luka is teaching him. ^.^ Oh, the headcanons.
> 
> So, this is actually it for now. I mean, the next Daisy chapter will be up tomorrow, if you're following the main story, but my attention is on Daisy Thirty-Five right now. I'm trying to focus on the main storyline for a bit, and there's also a Marichat/Adrienette one-shot that I want to do. I'm sure there will be more Lukadrien/Lukadrienette drabbles in the future, though. I have ideas for four or five scenes that I want to do eventually.
> 
> Don't look at me like that. I'm sure I'll see you soon. Take care everyone!
> 
> References:  
Clàrsach: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ON8xHpQWq34  
Deku Palace: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2foI62hzyQ8&list=PLC675B851A38C9C2F&index=45  
Inverted Stone Tower Temple: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_J9VlNOmJY  
Clock Town: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JaflMqvxIqA&list=PLC675B851A38C9C2F&index=8  
Theophany Deku Palace: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4r9S2yEiuME  
Pushkin: https://www.oxfordlieder.co.uk/song/2093


	25. A Unified Front

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They've never done this before, so a little freaking out is warranted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! If you've been reading my new Lukadrienette work To Waltz Among Shadows (now complete), you'll have been expecting this chapter last Thursday. Unfortunately, I'm really depressed and tired on top of having to cover my coworker D's duties as well as my own while she's on "vacation", so I haven't had the mental energy to edit this and get it posted. That being said, it's up now, and I hope you enjoy it.
> 
> This takes place when Marinette and Adrien are twenty-four and Luka is twenty-six.

Luka had thought that Marinette and Adrien were still out cold when he left them.

Marinette had had a bit of a stomach bug and wasn’t sleeping well, and Adrien had done a matinée as well as an evening performance of Wicked the day before, so Luka thought it would be a nice treat to bring his spouses breakfast in bed.

He was just debating what to make them—he was leaning towards tofu scramble and toast. Normally Adrien was the only one who ate tofu, but Marinette had been craving it suddenly the past week or so—when a pair of arms wrapped around him from behind.

Adrien pulled Luka back against him, nuzzling his husband’s shoulder.

Luka hummed contentedly, savoring the feel of Adrien’s hands on his chest, the warmth of Adrien’s bare skin against Luka’s back.

“Good morning, Love.”

“Morning,” Adrien muttered into Luka’s neck, breath tickling.

Luka didn’t protest as Adrien turned him around and snaked his arms around his neck, guiding Luka down into a languid kiss.

When they pulled apart a minute or two later, Luka whispered against Adrien’s lips, “What do you want for breakfast, P5? I was going to make breakfast in bed.”

“Sausage,” Adrien chuckled impishly, pushing Luka back against the counter as his lips slowly made their way down Luka’s throat.

At first, Luka was confused.

Adrien wasn’t strictly a vegetarian. He ate meat without complaint when it was put in front of him, but he never voluntarily chose meat when given other options.

As Adrien trailed kisses down Luka’s chest and stomach, fingering the band of Luka’s pajama pants and getting down on his knees, it struck Luka that Adrien had meant “sausage” euphemistically.

“Oh,” Luka laughed, covering his mouth with a hand. “And here I thought _I_ would be spoiling _you_ today.”

Adrien smirked, running a hand lightly down Luka’s thigh. “You can spoil me later. Right now, I want to take care of _you_.”

“Any special occasion?” Luka hummed, threading his fingers through Adrien’s hair, finding The Spot, and rubbing gently.

Adrien began to purr in pleasure, pressing against Luka’s hand wantonly as he slipped Luka’s pajama pants down. “I’ve noticed since Marinette’s been sick that we’re not making love very often. Just because I’m ace and don’t really feel the need to express our love sexually doesn’t mean that I can’t understand and appreciate _your_ needs.”

“Very thoughtful of you.” Luka inhaled sharply as Adrien slowly peeled down Luka’s boxers.

“I love my husband and want him to be happy.”

Luka gasped as Adrien pressed a kiss to the crease at the top of Luka’s leg.

“You make me very, very happy,” Luka assured, gripping the counter behind him with one hand and Adrien’s hair with the other as Adrien teasingly trailed kisses down in a serpentine line from Luka’s hip.

“Luka! Adrien!” Marinette called from the top of the stairs, voice tight and unnaturally high.

“In the kitchen!” Adrien replied before getting back to the task at hand, not registering the hint of panic in their wife’s voice.

Marinette came darting down the steps, racing into the kitchen. She stopped short when she spotted them.

Adrien grinned. “Good morning, Princess. We were just having dessert before breakfast. Care to join us?”

“No!” Marinette snapped in exasperation, waving her arms (and, thus, the pregnancy test she was currently clutching in her fist) wildly. “I’m pregnant! One of you got me pregnant!”

“What?” Luka and Adrien breathed in tandem.

Marinette held out the test with shaking hands. “It’s positive. I thought maybe there was a mistake, so I did it again, but all three times, it was positive.”

Luka was the first to recover, pulling up his pants and going to Marinette, resting a hand at the center of her back and looking down at the apparatus.

Adrien pushed himself up to his feet, coming to peer down at the test from Marinette’s opposite side. “That symbol means positive?”

“Mmhm,” Marinette whimpered.

“These things work by picking up on a chemical that you only produce if you’re pregnant, right?” Luka verified.

Marinette nodded.

“So it would be impossible to get a false positive, because it’s not going to pick up on something that’s not actually there, right?” Luka reasoned.

Marinette nodded again, beginning to tremble as she absorbed that this was actually happening.

“So…we’re pregnant,” Adrien whispered in hushed awe.

Marinette tensed, leaning more heavily against Luka.

“We’re going to have a baby,” Adrien giggled, beginning to bounce with joy. “We’re going to be parents!”

“P5,” Luka called gently, noting how pale and dazed Marinette looked. “I don’t think we’re excited about this.”

Adrien looked up from the test to gape at Luka. “What? Why wouldn’t we be?”

Luka motioned pointed with his eyes at Marinette.

Adrien looked at their wife and instantly sobered. “My Lady, what’s wrong?”

He slipped an arm around her waist and nuzzled at her hair affectionately.

“Can we go sit on the couch?” Marinette requested, voice as weak as her legs felt.

Adrien and Luka shared a look and nodded.

The test was disposed of, and the threesome reconvened on the couch in the front parlor that doubled as Luka’s music room.

Luka and Adrien curled up on either side of Marinette, stroking her hair, nuzzling her neck, and pressing dandelion-soft kisses here and there.

“What’s wrong, Chanson?” Luka prompted. “Talk to us.”

She shook her head, fighting back the tears that were stinging the corners of her eyes. “It’s silly because a part of me _is_ excited. I’ve always wanted children, a big family, and to be able to have that with you two really is a dream come true, but…”

She gulped and snuggled closer to Adrien, tucking her head under his chin even as she tightened her grip on Luka’s hand. “…this feels so much different than when I was a silly teenager picking out names for the kids I was going to have with Adrien before I really even got to know him. This is…big…overwhelming.”

“Yeah,” Luka hummed softly. “I can understand that. I feel a little bit of that too.”

“What specifically is overwhelming?” Adrien asked gently, his hand rubbing circles on her back. “Tell us what’s going through your head. Maybe we can help with some of that.”

Marinette nodded. “I mean…I’ve been feeling pretty sick. I guess this is morning sickness? I don’t know how long this is going to last, and this is awful. I’m miserable, and I’ve heard it just gets worse with the back pain and the swollen ankles and the baby pushing on your bladder and kicking and weight gain and stretch marks and breastfeeding… I’m kind of scared of all the changes coming, and I don’t really know what to expect, so…”

She shook her head.

“Hey,” Luka cooed, tracing patterns on the back of her hand with his finger. “It’s going to be okay. I know Adrien and I don’t have to go through our bodies changing like you do, but we’re going to be with you every step of the way, and we’re going to pamper you through this.”

“Yeah,” Adrien chuckled. “I will happily give you foot rubs while Luka massages your back. You seriously think we’d let the mother of our child want for anything? Come on, Marinette. We’re going to take care of you.”

“But will you still want me when I’m fat?” she groaned, trying not to think about all the cute clothes she wouldn’t be able to wear in a few months.

“Princess, you are going to be so sexy pregnant,” Adrien assured.

“Adrien isn’t going to be able to keep his hands off of your bump,” Luka snickered, making Marinette laugh despite herself.

“Well, duh,” Adrien snorted, right hand going to rub Marinette’s still-flat stomach. “That’s my baby in there. There’s going to be kisses and nuzzles and resting my head on her stomach and talking to Baby…I mean…once they develop ears? …I’m going to have to research stages of fetus development.”

Adrien frowned as the reality of the situation started to sink in. “I need to go to the library. I’m suddenly realizing that I have no idea what I’m doing, and I only have a few months to get prepared.”

Luka groaned. “Perfect Fifth, don’t you start too. Look. We have time, and we have resources. After breakfast, we’ll all get cleaned up and head to the library. We’ll read books and articles. We’ll talk to people who have done this before. We have friends and relatives who have had babies before, so this isn’t something that we have to figure out on our own from scratch. We have months to get ready, and I think once we start getting informed, we’ll all feel a lot better, right? And then we can focus on being excited because we’re all really excited about this despite our misgivings, right?”

“Definitely,” Marinette assured, lifting her head from Adrien’s shoulder to give Luka a kiss. “_Definitely_.”

“Adrien?” Luka looked to his husband expectantly.

Adrien nodded, tears coming to his eyes and brimming over. “I want a family with you two more than anything.”

Luka smiled in adoration, reaching out to ruffle Adrien’s hair. “Yeah. Me too. I can’t wait to meet our child. I hope they have Adrien’s eyes and Marinette’s smile.”

Adrien frowned. “I want a baby with _your_ eyes, Orpheus.”

“Guys,” Marinette chuckled, lacing her fingers through one hand each of Luka and Adrien’s. “If everything goes well, we can have another baby.”

Adrien snickered, nuzzling at Marinette’s ear. “Promise?”

She rolled her eyes. “If things go well, I want a big family. We’ll see.”

“Okay,” Adrien relented, brushing his lips against Marinette’s temple.

“Works for me,” Luka agreed, squeezing Marinette’s hand. “Now, if we’re all feeling more calm about the situation, how about you two get dressed while I make you breakfast, and then we’ll start our research.”

Marinette took a deep inhale and breathed out slowly. “Okay.” She nodded, giving her boys’ hands a light squeeze before pushing herself up off the couch.

Adrien smiled deliriously as he watched her go.

Luka shook his head at his silly, gorgeous spouses, unable to contain a joy-filled smile of his own. He felt so lucky to have them, so blessed that his family was growing.

He was still apprehensive. After all, Luka had never known his biological father, and the man he’d called “father” hadn’t been the best example of a paternal figure. He was understandably nervous, but, somehow, despite lacking a role model in his own life, he knew he’d figure it out, and he knew that the same would be true of Adrien.

Despite the absence of a fatherly presence in their own lives growing up, Luka knew that he and Adrien would be able to step up and be the fathers that they themselves had never had. They would love their child. They would be there for their son or daughter. They would get it right.

A sliver of doubt bared its fangs in the back of Luka’s mind, but, looking at Adrien and Marinette, hope for the future won out.

How could he not succeed when he and his partners made such an incredible team? They were going to be epic parents.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some of you may be asking, "Since when is Adrien asexual? I thought he was biromantic heterosexual in the Daisy/Jabberwocky universe". At the current point in the Daisy/Jabberwocky universe, Adrien THINKS he's biromantic heterosexual because he's not really romantically experienced. Ladybug and Marinette are the only people he's really even considered a sexual relationship with, but even then, a sexual component to the relationship is just theoretical and secondary to things like snuggling and dates and being emotionally close to his romantic partner. He's mostly interested in a romantic relationship with Ladybug/Marinette which includes physically romantic elements, but he hasn't given much concrete thought to sex at that point. It's only once Adrien, Marinette, and Luka are all in a relationship and at the point where things have advanced physically that he discovers that he doesn't just struggle with sexual attraction to Luka but also to Marinette. He's not as adverse to sexual intimacy with Marinette as he initially was with Luka, but he discovers that it's not really something he particularly wants or needs with men or women. He eventually comes to the determination that he's biromantic asexual. ...Not that you asked for my long-winded explanation of Adrien's journey to understand his sexuality. ^.^;
> 
> Anyway. I hope you enjoyed the chapter. I'm going to try to have the next one up next Friday, 05/01/2020. Thanks for reading!


	26. Synchronicity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Luka and Adrien discover that they're more on the same wavelength than they thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, guys. I'm sorry this update is a day later than I said. I'm still really depressed, and then my thirteen-year-old cousin tried to kill herself on Thursday, and after work on Friday, the very thought of getting on the internet and interacting with people was just completely overwhelming, so I'm updating now instead.
> 
> This chapter takes place the summer after Phantasmagoria when Adrien is sixteen and Luka is eighteen and a half. This is actually the chapter I had meant to write as Chapter Seven. Perhaps you'll remember that a bunch of people were over at the Liberty for the music festival and Adrien ended up cheering Luka up about the Marinette Situation? There was supposed to be an additional part at the end where Adrien brought up the fact that Luka acted differently around other people than he did with Adrien...but, at that point, the chapter felt complete as it was, so I saved the topic of Luka secretly being socially awkward for later. I didn't mean for it to be over six months later, but... ^.^;
> 
> Regardless, I hope you enjoy!

It was the middle of June, and the weather was perfect. All Adrien wanted to do was lie out on the deck of the Liberty, basking in the luxurious warmth of the sun and the soft strumming of Luka’s guitar.

Luka was more than happy to have him. After all, Adrien was good company: quiet in a companionable way when words weren’t needed but always ready with some witty retort or astute piece of insight whenever Luka did feel like talking.

Their musical collaborations were fulfilling in a way Luka had never experienced with another musician. It was as if Adrien instinctively knew where Luka was going with a piece, and whenever Luka got stuck, Adrien always had the perfect suggestion to get him out of his creative slump. Adrien was a well of inspiration, a genuine muse.

After two and a half months of friendship, Luka found that he’d quickly moved from an affectionate crush on Adrien to deep devotion and adoration.

Adrien was fast becoming a staple in all aspects of Luka’s life from family dinners to evenings spent cuddling and watching movies to jam sessions and lying about the houseboat to one-on-one basketball and teaching Adrien to do chores. Adrien was filling up the nooks and crannies of Luka’s life.

Even when they weren’t together, Adrien was always on Luka’s mind. Luka would be out and about and see something in a shop window that made him think of the other teen. Someone would say something funny, and Luka would later text it to Adrien so that they could share the joke.

Adrien stayed in close contact too. Luka periodically got texts throughout the day, even if Adrien was busy, letting Luka know that he wasn’t ever far from Adrien’s thoughts either.

It felt _so_ good to be that in sync with someone, so on the same wavelength.

Nothing had become official yet, and Luka wasn’t one hundred percent sure that Adrien viewed things between them in a romantic light…but the relationship was going well, so Luka decided to take the next step. He invited Adrien to meet and hang out with his friends.

Luka started with a small group from the music program at his university and then introduced Adrien to some of his classmates from the Literature Department. Luka took Adrien to a few of his concerts and let him mingle with his bandmates.

Adrien was a little shy at first with new people but still very friendly. Once a conversation started to flow, though, Adrien held his own well, often talking more than Luka himself.

It was reassuring to see his prospective partner getting along with the other people in Luka’s world. It made him wonder if soulmates really did exist because Adrien just…fit. In less than three months, Adrien had slipped into the grooves of Luka’s life to the point where Luka couldn’t remember how things had been before Adrien and couldn’t imagine things without him.

One Saturday at the end of the school year, a group from the Literature Department was congregating on the Liberty to review course material for the exam. It was during a time when Adrien was typically over, so Luka told him that he was free to join them but needn’t feel obligated, as the class content might be a little boring for someone not studying Literature.

Adrien surprised Luka by showing up anyway.

Luka’s classmates took turns teaching Adrien about different aspects of the pieces, authors, and literary movements that they had studied, and Adrien eagerly asked questions, giving the students a very thorough review that turned out to be objectively better and subjectively more fun than simply reviewing notes and passages from their texts like they had initially planned.

“You’re really interested in this, aren’t you?” Eugénie chuckled, giving Adrien a fond nudge. “Are you thinking about going into Literature in uni?”

Adrien blushed sheepishly, shaking his head. “No, not really. I mean, I _love_ reading, but I wouldn’t want to formally study it.”

“Well, you fooled us,” Gérard laughed. “You seem like you’re soaking this up like a sponge. What’s up with all of the probing questions, then? You just helping us study?”

Adrien’s cheeks darkened further.

He shrugged, hand coming up to rub at the back of his neck as he smiled. “Well, it _is_ interesting…on top of being a good way to learn more about what Luka’s studying. I want to understand so that he can talk about this stuff with me without having to dumb it down.”

“Aww,” Hélène cooed. “Luka, your boyfriend is so sweet! Thierry never takes an interest in the things I care about. You’re so lucky,” she half-pouted.

Luka’s cheeks burst into flame like embers finding dry brush. “Well,” he hedged, “he _is_ sweet, and I _am_ lucky, but…we’re not dating.”

“Wait. Seriously?” Eugénie raised a skeptical eyebrow. “Why _not_?”

Luka’s blush deepened as he averted his eyes, glancing longingly at the guitar propped against the wall by the drum set. His fingers twitched in agitation as dozens of possible answers to that question swirled around his head: because Adrien isn’t interested in guys, because what could Adrien Agreste possibly see in me, because he’s out of my league, because I don’t want to make things awkward and ruin our dynamic by asking him, because I don’t think he’s ready, because I’m afraid of messing it up and losing his friendship, because he’s still in love with someone else…

Adrien instantly picked up on how uncomfortable Luka was with the topic and rushed to take some of the pressure and attention off of his friend. “Does anyone want more of the chocolate lava cake?”

Gérard took mercy on Luka and helpfully raised his hand. “I could definitely go for seconds.”

Adrien scooped up Gérard’s plate and smiled sweetly at the girls. “How about drinks? Can I get anyone a refill?”

“Uh…I’ll just take water, please,” Hélène awkwardly replied.

“Me too, please,” Eugénie added uncertainly.

“Me three!” Gérard jumped in, even though his soda was still half full.

“Luka, could you please give me a hand?” Adrien requested with a practiced smile.

Luka readily acquiesced, following Adrien across the room to the kitchen.

Adrien set about cutting Gérard another slice of lava cake while Luka got out the bottle of Evian from the fridge and poured three glasses.

“Sorry for the misunderstanding,” Luka whispered so quietly that his lips barely moved. He trusted that Adrien’s sharpened hearing would pick up the words.

Adrien turned to rest a hand on Luka’s arm, giving it a bolstering squeeze. “Honestly, it doesn’t bother me,” Adrien assured, voice hushed but strong. “I mean, I do kind of act like your boyfriend, so it’s not like it’s a far-out conclusion to come to. _I’m_ sorry, Luka.”

Adrien’s eyebrows curved in remorse and guilt, taking Luka completely by surprise.

“P5, what do _you_ have to be sorry for?” he wondered, feeling like the ship beneath his feet had suddenly stopped rocking, leaving him off balance.

“Always hanging on you and teasing and flirting,” Adrien whispered back, brow furrowed, bottom lip jutting out slightly. “I didn’t think about how it might give other people the wrong idea. I promise I’ll tone it down when we’re in public going forward.”

If Luka were being totally honest, he would have to admit that Adrien’s affections were a guilty pleasure he savored. Other people seeing non-platonic motives in Adrien’s behaviour put Luka over the moon because that meant that he wasn’t just hallucinating or reading too much into things. It meant that maybe he had a chance. He was loath to lose a single touch, a single flirty line, a single puckish grin.

“You don’t have to do that,” Luka hastily countered, voice a little loud and high in pitch.

Adrien’s guilty expression turned into a puzzled one. “Are you sure? Luka, I saw how uncomfortable you were.”

“I was uncomfortable because I thought the topic made _you_ uncomfortable,” Luka fibbed. “I’m used to straight people assuming that just because I’m bi, I’m automatically interested in every other guy in my age range. Besides…” Luka looked back down at the water glasses. “…it’s really flattering that someone would think you’d date me, so…” Luka cleared his throat. “…so, you don’t have to change anything. You’re perfect the way you are.”

“Thanks,” Adrien replied, but he was still frowning. “I’ll be touched about that in a moment, but, first…why did you say you’d be flattered if someone thought I’d date you as if I _wouldn’t_ date you? Why wouldn’t I date you?”

Luka’s mouth opened, but no words came out.

Meanwhile, Eugénie, Hélène, and Gérard were straining their ears to hear while, at the same time, trying very hard to look like they were studying their notes intently.

“Luka, you’re wonderful,” Adrien supplied when he saw that his friend was at a loss for words. “Anyone would be thrilled to date you.”

Luka wanted to say, “even you?”, but he was afraid of the answer. Part of him thought this sounded like confirmation that he should make his romantic interest known. Another part suspected a trap, like Luka would confess, but then Adrien would say something like, “oh. No. Sorry. When I said, ‘anyone would be thrilled to date you’, I didn’t mean _me_”.

“You’re the most perfect guy I’ve ever met,” Adrien continued, trying to build up Luka’s self-esteem.

“I’m not perfect,” was the first thing that Luka could get his wits together enough to say.

Adrien rolled his eyes. “I didn’t say you were _perfect_. I said you were the ‘most perfect’, as in ‘most close to perfect’, so don’t talk down about yourself, okay? _You’re_ always telling _me_ that, so practice what you preach, okay?”

Luka nodded, a fond smile slowly blooming on his lips. “Thanks.”

Adrien winked, grabbing one of the water glasses as well as Gérard’s plate. “We good?”

Luka’s grin widened as he picked up the remaining two glasses and followed Adrien back over to the others. “Yeah. We’re good, Angel.”

“Okay!” Adrien called cheerfully as he set the plate and glass down in front of Gérard. “Someone explain [Magic Realism](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magic_realism) to me. I don’t get it.”

The group reluctantly let go of the relationship drama and got back to work.

Eugénie, Hélène, and Gérard left a little over an hour later, brains successfully picked clean by Adrien.

Luka began collecting the dirty dishes, but Adrien shooed him away, insisting. “_I’ll_ clean up. You go get your guitar and decompress.”

Luka blinked at Adrien. “Decompress?”

“Mmhm,” Adrien confirmed, gathering the forks before stacking the plates they’d eaten cake off of. “That thing you do after you’ve been around other people for too long.”

Adrien looked up and into Luka’s aquatic eyes. “Because being around other people for too long stresses you out, doesn’t it? So get your guitar and decompress. Either sit in here or leave your door open so I can listen to you play while I tidy up, okay?”

So stunned was Luka by the fact that Adrien had been paying close enough attention to identify one of Luka’s stressors and corresponding coping mechanism, that he actually went and got his guitar, sat on the wrap-around couch, and began to play instead of arguing and insisting on helping Adrien clean.

It was ten minutes and one clean plate later that Adrien spoke up.

“I’m around an awful lot, aren’t I?”

“Mmhm,” Luka agreed, eyes closed, still wrapped up in the song taking form at his fingertips.

“…Do you get stressed out when you’re around me too long?” Adrien wondered tentatively, half-afraid of the answer.

“You don’t count as another person,” Luka replied automatically, the filter between his brain and his mouth down for maintenance.

Adrien’s eyebrows danced in confusion for a second before Luka added, “You’re an extension of me.”

Adrien hummed softly, pleased with the response.

Luka opened his eyes and blinked, what he had said finally catching up. “Uh…I mean…”

“It’s okay,” Adrien assured, rinsing the second plate and then reaching for the towel to dry it. “I know what you mean.”

Luka continued to stare. “You…do?”

Adrien nodded. “That’s how I feel when I’m fighting beside Ladybug.”

Luka’s heart sank, his fingers landing a little too high on the strings and creating a dissonant chord.

Ladybug. Of course.

In his disappointment, Luka almost missed the way Adrien’s cheeks began to color.

Adrien paused, gripping the plate in his hands as he looked down with an embarrassed smile, continuing, “…and…”

Luka looked back up, breath catching.

“…how I feel when we’re making music together or lying up on the deck at night talking…or even when we’re just sitting in silence. It feels like you’re an extension of me too.” Adrien set the plate aside and grabbed another as he laughed softly. “It’s actually a relief to hear you say you feel the same way.”

“Yeah,” Luka whispered, in a bit of a daze. “Yeah. I thought it was just me.”

Adrien shrugged. “Nope. Looks like we’re in this together.”

Luka hummed happily, going back to the song he’d been playing and transitioning into G major. “Glad to know.”

The conversation slipped into a comfortable lull, filled by Luka’s music, the clink of dishes, and the swoosh of soapy water.

It didn’t take long for Adrien to get the negligible number of plates and cups clean, dry, and put away, and then he joined Luka back on the couch, closing his eyes and sinking into the notes.

The song eventually found its natural conclusion, and Adrien applauded.

“You need to adapt that one for one of your bands,” he encouraged. “There were some real gems to be polished in there.”

“Yeah?” Luka chuckled, opening his eyes to study Adrien’s earnest expression.

Adrien nodded enthusiastically before hooking one arm over the back of the couch and leaning in to rest his chin on top. “Definitely.”

“All right. I’ll pick it apart and put it back together again later and see what happens.” With a pleased grin, Luka turned back to his guitar, starting with a new melody.

He fiddled around and worked on developing the idea for a few minutes before picking up on a subtle shift in Adrien: the purse of his lips, the slight crease of his brow, the set of his jaw, the cloudy look in his eyes, the slightly heavier feeling to his presence.

Luka tipped his head to the side, focusing his attention away from the guitar. “Something on your mind, P5? You look like you’re puzzling through something.”

Adrien smiled sheepishly, straightening up on the couch with a shrug of nonchalance. “Just…you.”

“Me?” Luka echoed.

Adrien nodded. “Lately, as you’ve been inviting me to hang out with your other friends, I’ve kind of noticed something.”

Luka’s eyebrow cocked slightly.

“You act differently around them,” Adrien answered reluctantly.

The bottom dropped out of Luka’s stomach like an elevator car with its cables cut. “Different…in a bad way?”

Adrien hurriedly shook his head. “No, no. Just…different. I mean, I like you better when you’re just with me, but…it’s not a negative difference. You’re just…a lot quieter around other people. You don’t talk much, you look uncomfortable more often…I mean, sometimes you joke around with other people, but…it’s not like when it’s just the two of us or when we’re with your family. I was just wondering why the difference.”

Luka gave a little chuckle and looked back at his guitar. “Ah. You’ve discovered my secret. I’m socially awkward and fairly introverted.”

“No, you’re not,” Adrien laughed, completely incredulous.

Luka shrugged. “I am one hundred percent serious.”

“_You_? Socially awkward?” Adrien scoffed lightly. “Luka, you say the suavest things. You’re always teasing and joking and making me laugh. You’re funny and kind and emotionally sensitive. You always know what to say. How am I supposed to believe that you of all people are social awkward?”

Luka smiled sheepishly and shrugged again. “Well, I’m glad _you_ think so, but…look at the evidence. You’re the one who said I’m different around other people. Different how so?”

Adrien frowned, considering before he responded, “…Quiet. Withdrawn…maybe a little shy. Not at ease. It’s not a constant thing. I mean, sometimes you’re totally fine, but…other times…” Adrien’s eyebrows pinched together. “…I guess you are kind of awkward in big groups.”

Luka nodded. “Acting ‘normal’ and determining what’s socially acceptable around a bunch of people for an extended amount of time is really draining. It doesn’t come naturally to me.”

“But…” Adrien pursed his lips. “…you’re not like that with me.”

“No,” Luka confirmed with a warm smile. “I feel at ease with you. I rarely have to think about what I’m going to say—what I’m _supposed_ to say. You’re one of the few people I can just be me around. With you, things just fit.”

“Oh,” Adrien breathed, scooting in closer.

He could feel his cheeks burning with pleasure.

“I feel the same way about you,” he whispered, carefully slotting himself in at Luka’s side so that he wouldn’t get in the way of the guitar. He rested his head on Luka’s shoulder and closed his eyes.

Luka let his head tip so that it rested against Adrien’s, Adrien’s hair soft against Luka’s cheek.

“Thanks, Perfect Fifth,” he whispered.

Luka couldn’t be sure that Adrien meant it in a romantic way, but at least Luka knew for sure that they were on the same wavelength. Adrien was still hung up on Ladybug, but, maybe, in another month or two…

Luka should tell him. At the end of the summer, before school started up again, Luka would reevaluate the situation. At the very least, he could make Adrien aware of his feelings, put the ball in Adrien’s court. If Adrien just wanted friendship, fine, but if there was a part of Adrien that did think of Luka in a romantic light…

At the end of the summer, they would see.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, guys. I hope you liked it.
> 
> I've got one more Nachtmusik chapter at the moment, and I'm going to try to have it up by next weekend, so look out for that on Friday/Saturday (May eighth/ninth, 2020). Maybe Sunday, 05/10/2020 at the latest, depending on how I'm feeling. 
> 
> I'm going to take this Monday off from work to try to regroup. I might just end up sleeping, but maybe I'll get some writing done. I've barely been writing the past month. I've only got, like, nine thousand words of Serendipity (the Marichat and Adrienette fifty kisses piece) done, so I'm not sure I'll have any of that ready to release the week of May eleventh. :/ 
> 
> I'm not happy with what I've written. It could just be the depression making me think that what I've written is awful, or maybe it's that because I'm depressed I'm not writing very well. I'll try to get something cleaned up so that I can keep updating at least once a week. You guys seem to enjoy my work whether I think it's any good or not, so I guess it's better just to share it. I feel a lot better when people interact with my work. It makes me feel less alone, so it will be good for me to keep writing and posting chapters too. I'm getting zero social interaction lately, so it feels like I have no friends and don't matter to anyone. :/
> 
> Anyway. Pardon my morose mood. Thanks for reading, guys. I hope to see you soon!
> 
> References:  
Magic Realism: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magic_realism


	27. Finding a Voice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Luka finds the right instrument to work through his grief.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, guys. I hope you're all doing well. I'm still in a really dark mood, but my cousin got to come home from the hospital and seems to be doing pretty well, all things considered, so that's a victory. Thank you all very much for your outpouring of support and love. You guys are the best. I really mean that.
> 
> Today's episode takes place in December when Adrien is sixteen and Luka has just turned nineteen. His birthday is October twenty-second. Luka's in a bad place mentally, but this chapter is about one of the ways in which he starts to heal.
> 
> Enjoy!

There was a gentle tapping at Luka’s cabin door before Rose turned the handle and slowly nudged it open.

“Knock, knock,” she called quietly, voice low.

Luka’s throbbing head appreciated this immensely.

“You up?” she whispered as she tentatively approached.

“Unfortunately,” Luka groaned, pulling the cover over his head.

Rose sighed, hiking up her leg to rest one hip on his mattress.

Her right foot kicked back and forth like a metronome.

She was silent, but Luka could hear her eyes boring into him through the blanket.

Rose was like that. She looked small and cute and harmless, but, within, she was fierce, unyielding, and deadly.

Luka reluctantly pulled down the cover to peek up at her with crusty, bloodshot eyes. “Yes?”

She sighed again, voice soft and kind, cajoling. “Are you thinking about getting up today?”

“More important things on my mind right now,” he mumbled emotionlessly.

“Oh?” Rose reached out to brush greasy bangs out of his eyes with all the tenderness and care due to cleaning off an ancient artifact.

A hint of bitterness stained his weary voice. “Like how much I wish I were unconscious right now so I wouldn’t have to feel the shock of having had a limb hacked off without being put under first.”

“Okay,” Rose replied patiently. “I realize that that’s very important.” She purposely left out the “but” before continuing, “It’s also important to focus on taking care of yourself. Why don’t we switch tracks and do that a little bit before you go back to focusing on how bad you feel?”

Luka shook his head slowly. “Sometimes I still wake up expecting him to be curled up next to me, and then it hits me all over how I’m never going to see him again.”

Rose winced. “…I’m sorry, Lulu.”

He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Do you think you could slip me one of Juleka’s sleeping pills?”

“Luka,” she replied sternly.

“It’s been a few hours. The alcohol should be all out of my system. I wouldn’t take it if I’d been drinking. I promise, Rose. I’m not suicidal,” he insisted, hoping to convince her to help him.

She shook her head resolutely. “Maybe you’re not _actively_ suicidal, but you’re sure not trying very hard to stay alive, Luka. I’m not helping you get your hands on anything that could hurt you. We locked those sleeping pills up for a reason.”

Luka blew out another sigh, running a hand through his thick, slightly stiff hair.

“…Why don’t you get up and shower?” Rose suggested. “You’ll feel better once you get clean and put on some fresh clothes and eat something.”

“I don’t want to feel better,” Luka grumbled, rolling over so that his back was to her. “I want A-Adrien.”

His voice cracked in his anguish, putting a chink in Rose’s heart as well.

“I know,” she whispered, “but if you take care of yourself a little and start feeling less miserable, maybe you’ll start _wanting_ to feel less miserable.”

He didn’t reply.

She stared at his back for a long moment. “Luka, Adrien loves you. He wouldn’t want to see you like this,” she tried.

Luka snorted ruefully. “Well, good thing he doesn’t have to. Ever again.”

“Luka, you know that’s not what I meant,” Rose replied, trying not to sound as exasperated as she felt. “Adrien wouldn’t want you to be like this. He’d want you to take care of yourself and be happy.”

“I’ll take care of myself and be happy when Adrien comes and asks me himself,” he retorted in a mockingly sweet tone.

Rose sighed and fell silent.

Remorse slowly welled up in Luka’s chest, overriding the throbbing in his head and the bitterness in his heart.

“I’m sorry, Rose. I know you’re just trying to help.” Luka rolled back over and tentatively placed his hand on top of hers. “Sorry I’m such a toxic wreck. I just…This is what grief looks like. I thought I was in love before with Honoré…with Marinette…and maybe I was. Maybe that was love, but _this_…Adrien…he’s my soulmate. I don’t think this is something I can get over.”

Rose was quiet a minute or two more, reflecting before replying patiently, “Lulu, we’re not asking you to get over it. We just need you to get out of bed and eat some real food and not drink so much. We need you to try to go back to school…try to go back to work…not get drunk and nearly die in motorcycle accidents.”

Luka sucked in a breath, not daring to point out that his bike was totaled, so another motorcycle accident wasn’t happening anytime soon, and that he hadn’t “nearly died” in the wreck. As drunk as he’d been when the idea to storm the Agreste Mansion and force Gabriel to let him back into Adrien’s life had entered his head, Luka had still remembered to put on his [helmet](https://www.google.com/search?q=durarara!!+celty+helmet&rlz=1C1SQJL_enUS779US779&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwi2h6zLmaPpAhWMG80KHaggAFMQ_AUoAnoECAwQBA&biw=1366&bih=625)…the black one with cat ears that Adrien had given him. Luka had gotten banged up a bit in the landing, but he’d walked away from the crash.

“Sorry,” Luka whispered. “I know I’m driving you all mad with worry.”

“Because we _love_ you, Big Bro,” Rose sighed, flipping her palm over under his to grasp his hand. “Can you please shower and put on fresh clothes sometime today? Maybe try to eat some toast? Or, if you like, I can make you an egg or some bacon? Come on. Let’s try to do the bare minimum and see if maybe we can do something else after that,” she urged, trying to sound encouraging. It came off more like desperate.

“Maybe if you get up and get dressed and you eat something, you’ll find the energy to…to play guitar,” she suggested optimistically. “You haven’t played in months, and we all miss your music. What do you think?”

Luka slowly shook his head. “I can’t. I’ve tried periodically, Rose. I’ve tried to get these feelings out of me, to work them into a song, but the guitar just isn’t… It doesn’t work. A guitar can’t express what I’m feeling. Sure, I can play sad, heartbroken songs, but that’s not what I need from an instrument right now. I need an instrument who can scream in bloody, violent agony, Rose.”

She bit her lip, getting up and going over to the far side of his room where the usual assortment of instruments was either lined up or stacked. Her eyes skimmed the organized mess, searching for something to help.

She came up empty.

Well, there _was_ one candidate, but…she didn’t think it would be good for Luka to try the keyboard he and Adrien had often played together.

With a sigh, she slunk back over to his bedside. “Please get up. Juleka’s really freaking out. Just…shower, get dressed, eat, and let me switch out the sheets for you. You can go back to bed for another couple days after that, but…please, Luka?”

Luka took a long, slow breath. As he blew it out, he pushed down the covers and swung his legs over the side of the bed. “All right, Little Sis. Shower, new clothes, food, but then I’m going back to sleep.”

“Thank you.” Rose nearly cried as she watched Luka trudge across the room to the bathroom.

“Sure thing,” he mumbled. At least, that’s what she thought he said. He didn’t put much energy into make his words audible.

“I’ll just tidy up a bit while you’re in the shower,” she replied, already plotting how quickly she could change the linen, pick up the assortment of empty alcohol bottles and junk food wrappers, and clean out the minifridge (surely filled with molding specimens more fitted to a research lab than a bedroom).

Twenty minutes later, when Luka finally dragged himself out of the shower, he found his room completely overhauled. All the filth he’d been working on stockpiling the past four months had been summarily evicted. His bed was made—sheets now smelling fresh and not like Bvlgari Blv. Though, to be honest, they hadn’t smelled like Adrien’s bath products in months.

Rose had left the comforter alone as asked back in September when she’d first tried to wash his sheets.

“Asked” wasn’t really the right word. He’d freaked out when he discovered she’d washed his bedding while he was passed out drunk in the main cabin. Luckily, the nail polish stain on the comforter from Adrien and Luka’s last night together when Adrien had asked Luka to paint his toenails with a Viperion-inspired design had survived the washing.

Luka let his towel drop to the floor. He slid into the fresh clothes Rose had set out for him and then grabbed the comforter, wrapping it around himself, pressing it to his face, trying to smell some hint of Adrien left on it.

He wished he had Chat Noir’s keen sense of smell.

The comforter didn’t smell like anything.

This wasn’t really surprising. Adrien and Luka had shared warm months from the end of March until the middle of August. They hadn’t used the comforter on the occasions when Adrien spent the night. True, they had curled up on top of the covers to watch movies, but there was no trace of Adrien left save the nail polish stain.

Luka tossed the comforter haphazardly up on the bed and trudged out of his room, into the main cabin where Anarka was lounging on the couch and Juleka and Rose were busy in the kitchen.

“Lulu,” Rose called chipperly. “I made eggs and toast. Come eat.”

Anarka looked up from her book, taking in the emaciated wreck of her son. “Good morning. It’s nice to see you up. How are you feeling, Luc?”

Luka sank down on the opposite limb of the wraparound couch from his mother, too tired to go any farther. He contemplated his response for a moment as Rose brought over Luka’s plate and a glass of water.

“Thanks,” he mumbled, forcing himself to pick up a piece of toast and chew.

Luka swallowed and replied honestly, “Like my insides are dead but somehow my body won’t stop moving.” As an afterthought, he added, “I should write a song.”

Anarka swallowed hard, reminding herself that she wasn’t allowed to cry now. That had to wait until night when she was alone in her cabin.

“It wouldn’t be a very nice song,” Luka continued distractedly, spearing a fluffy globule of egg and transferring it to his mouth. “Probably something ultra-[serialist](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Serialism). [Nontonal](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atonality). Maybe I could use the [twelve-tone method](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twelve-tone_technique) so I really had to concentrate on the composition of the piece.”

A tense silence fell as Luka took another bite of toast, suddenly realizing that he was famished.

No one knew what to say, and all three of the women were desperate to change the subject.

Luka helpfully obliged. “My head is killing me. It feels like it’s about to split open.”

“Because you’re dehydrated,” Juleka suggested. “Drink some water.”

Anarka gave a snort. “You’d think he’d be overly hydrated with the amount he drinks.”

Luka ignored his mother lashing out in frustration in favour of taking a long swallow from his glass.

“Be nice, Maman,” Juleka chided meekly as she set down the towel she’d been using to dry dishes and came over to sit beside Luka, tentatively resting her head on his shoulder.

He tipped his head to the side to nuzzle her hair and then went back to eating.

Anarka sighed, picking up her book once more and staring blankly at the pages, unable to concentrate on the words. She wanted to strangle Gabriel Agreste and give his son a good shake and a slap upside the head.

If she never heard the name Agreste again, it would be too soon. She’d never forgive them for what they’d done to her boy.

“Would you wanna jam a little bit after breakfast?” Juleka suggested, a frailly hopeful tone in her voice. “I’ve got this killer bass line just waiting for a guitar part to flesh it out.”

Luka slowly finished chewing and swallowed the bit of toast he’d been working on. “I’d love to hear what you’ve come up with, but I’ve kind of got a headache at the moment. Maybe a little later today, okay? I really want to head back to bed for a bit.”

Juleka nodded, trying not to let her disappointment show. “Yeah. Sure. Later.”

He turned his head to give her another nuzzle. “I promise, Jules. Later today. Just let me sleep a couple hours.”

“All right,” Juleka agreed, feeling a little better now that she was sure he wasn’t just brushing her off.

“Luka,” Anarka sighed, snapping her book closed. “It’s eleven o’clock. I hate to harp at you, but you can’t just sleep the day away. You need to get up and do something productive.”

“Maman,” Luka groaned. “Not today. I’m not feeling well.”

“Why? Because you’re drunk again?” she huffed.

Juleka tensed.

Luka put a hand on Juleka’s leg as he corrected, “Hungover. Let me sleep for a few hours, and then I’ll get up and listen to Juleka play, okay?” he bartered.

“No.” Anarka put her foot down. “Luka Couffaine, this has gone on long enough. I’ve let you wallow and try to destroy yourself for four months. Now, I’ve had enough of this, young man. I’m sorry that you’re hurting, and I would do anything to make it better for you, but, obviously, supporting you while letting you ride this out isn’t working,” she sighed in frustration.

“Maman,” Luka tried to coax.

Anarka wouldn’t hear it. “No,” she repeated forcefully. “I thought you’d snap out of it after nearly killing yourself on that bike on your birthday, but you haven’t gotten any better. I’ve tried to be nurturing and understanding and supportive, and it’s gotten us nowhere. I am at my wit’s end, Luka, and if I have to be a drill sergeant to get you out of bed and back out there with the living, so help me, I’ll do it.”

Luka squeezed Juleka’s knee gently as her trembling started to grow worse.

“Maman,” he replied in a slightly tense, entreating tone.

Rose quickly wiped off her hands, coming around to the side of the couch. “Okay, you guys. Let’s all take a deep breath, okay?”

“Luka, this behavior is unacceptable,” Anarka continued intently as if she couldn’t hear Rose. “I understand that you’re heartbroken, but this is getting ridiculous. There are plenty of other people out there. Adrien isn’t worth killing yourself over.”

“You’re such a hypocrite,” Luka snapped with venom as he shot to his feet.

Anarka, Juleka, and Rose collectively flinched.

Luka turned to Rose, tersely commanding, “Take Juleka somewhere else. Please,” he remembered to add.

Rose nodded, snaking her arm through Juleka’s. “Come on, Honey. Let’s go to your room. Show me the bass part you’ve been working on, Juju.”

Juleka obediently followed after her girlfriend but couldn’t help casting a worried glance back at her brother and mother.

Once the girls were gone, Anarka sighed, opening her arms down at her sides in a “come at me” gesture. “All right,” she encouraged tiredly. “Let me have it. I’m a hypocrite?”

Luka didn’t pull any punches. “Do you remember when Father left you?”

Anarka winced and opened her mouth to reply, but Luka cut her off.

“—No! You don’t! Because you spent a _year_ blind drunk and moping around the house afterwards!” he accused, jabbing a finger at her.

She lowered her eyes and sighed. “Luka—”

“—No!” he snapped. “I don’t want to hear your sorry excuses. Do you know who held your hair back as you puked into the toilet? Who cleaned you up when you spilled vodka all over yourself? Who got odd jobs running deliveries so we’d have money for groceries? Who figured out how to pay the bills so we’d have water and electricity? Who made sure you ate? Who fed his sister and made sure she went to school and did her homework and took her medicine and went to the therapist and had clean clothes? Who took care of her in the middle of the night when she woke up from nightmares because her father was suddenly gone and her mother was a wreck? Do you know who held this family together while you were busy wallowing in self-pity, Anarka Couffaine?”

With each accusation, she sank further into the couch cushions, feeling smaller and smaller. She couldn’t look at him. He was right. He’d done it all and never complained, never mentioned it. When she’d come back to herself after a year-long void in her memory, he’d smiled and told her he loved her. He’d never held it over her head, never told her everything he’d done.

“Your ten-year-old son,” Luka hissed, lowering his voice to a hurt murmur. “Father abandoned _me_ too, but I didn’t have time to be sad and angry. I had to put every ounce of energy into taking care of you and Juleka. I don’t resent that, Maman. I _love_ you two so, so much, and even though I was terrified and overwhelmed, I was happy that I could take care of you. I was proud that I could keep it all together and protect my family.”

His voice softened. “I don’t resent you, Maman. I’m not mad, and I’d do it again in a heartbeat. I just want you to remember what it was like when Father left. Now I’m the one who can’t get out of bed and doesn’t want to eat and longs to slip into an alcohol-induced oblivion to make the pain stop.”

“Oh, my baby,” Anarka sighed, rising to her feet, going to him, and pulling him into a fierce hug. “My poor boy.”

He rested his head against her shoulder. “I can’t push my feelings down and pretend I’m okay this time.”

“Luc,” she sighed, running a hand up and down his back. “Oh, Luc. Ma Baleine, it’s all right. It’s going to be okay.”

“I don’t think so,” Luka mumbled.

“It will,” she insisted, squeezing him tighter. “We’re going to get you through this.”

They stood there for a minute or two before Anarka spoke up again. “Why don’t you go sleep a little more?”

Luka gradually disentangled himself from his mother’s arms and nodded. “Could you go check on Juleka? Tell her I’m sorry for snapping.”

“I will,” Anarka assured. She bit her lip and tentatively asked, “You’ll get up again in a couple hours?”

Luka nodded, pulling away. “I promised Juleka I’d listen to the song she’s working on.”

A relieved look slowly took hold on Anarka’s face. “Okay. Thank you.” She watched after him as he trudged back towards his cabin.

Her teeth sank further into her lip. “I—…I love you, Luc.”

He turned slightly to smile tiredly over his shoulder. It didn’t really reach his eyes. “I know. Thanks. I love you too, Maman.”

Luka kept his word, getting up again a few hours later to listen to Juleka play. He said he’d think about a guitar part to go with it. He really couldn’t come up with anything at that point. His head was still a cacophony of angry, anguished notes with no outlet in any of the instruments currently in his possession.

The following day, Anarka knocked at his cabin door in the mid-morning, peeking her head in without waiting for his response. “Hey.”

“…Hey,” he mumbled groggily.

His sleep schedule was completely messed up. After his mid-afternoon nap the previous day, he hadn’t been able to fall back asleep until nearly four in the morning, and he was feeling it.

“You thinking about getting up today?” She waited expectantly.

He groaned.

“Maybe a little later?” she tried. “For a few hours?”

“Okay,” he relented. “Later for three or four hours.”

A relieved smile spread across her lips. “Okay. Thank you. When you get up, could you maybe go to the old storeroom and go through some of the boxes? Maybe just one box?” she revised. “I’m trying to free up some space.”

The thought of expending that much effort made Luka feel exhausted already.

He took a deep breath and reminded himself that he loved his family and could do this one thing to make them worry about him less.

“I can at least start on a box,” he conceded. “I didn’t sleep well, so I kind of want to get a little more rest before I do anything.”

“All right,” she compromised. “Rose or Juleka will bring you something to eat in an hour or two. Is there anything in particular you want?”

Luka closed his eyes and sighed. “Pain au chocolat and passionfruit macarons? Maybe some sour cream on the side?”

Anarka frowned. “Odd choice, but okay.”

“They’re comfort foods,” Luka muttered.

Anarka hummed thoughtfully, wondering _whose_ comfort foods they were because Luka had never displayed a preference for any of those. She had her suspicions, but she wasn’t about to ask. “Hey, if you’ll eat them, I’ll have the girls run to Tom and Sabine’s.”

“I will,” Luka promised.

“All right then. Go back to sleep,” she urged, quietly pulling the door flush with the frame.

True to his word, Luka ate the pastries and the glob of sour cream when they were brought to him.

Later that afternoon, he got out of bed and headed to the storeroom, intent on making good on his promise to start going through one of the boxes of his old stuff.

The Couffaines were all packrats, and the storeroom was piled high with junk, not all of which had actually made it into boxes. Luka decided to start with the loose articles, making two piles as he went: stuff to keep and stuff to give away or pitch.

More items were ending up in the pitch pile than not. Luka couldn’t believe how much detritus had built up in their lives. Who had decided that they needed that many lawn flamingos or that they might someday have use for pool floats with holes in them?

The Couffaines had never been well-off, so they’d always been thrifty and resourceful, careful to reuse and repurpose whenever they could…but, even then, Luka couldn’t justify holding onto some of the stuff that had ended up in that storeroom.

With an exasperated sigh, he lugged an old clunker of a sewing machine over to the refuse pile. Maybe he’d consult Marinette and see if she thought it could be fixed. Maybe they could give it to her or sell it if she didn’t want it. She’d probably think the antique machine was neat, but he suspected she’d prefer to work with something modern that could do zippers and buttonholes.

Luka turned back to the junkheap, eyes scanning for the next most-likely target. He paused, spotting a gem amid the rubbish.

He grabbed the stepstool and climbed up to retrieve the violin case from on top of one of the box towers near the back. A layer of dust had formed over the case, and Luka tried to remember the last time he’d seen the instrument.

He’d never actually played violin seriously, but he had a passing familiarity with how to play it. Although not infallible, he possessed a good ear for pitch and had faith that he could figure it out given time.

They’d had the violin for as long as Luka could remember, and it was one of the many instruments he’d messed around with growing up. It had probably been three or four years since he’d last played.

The violin had never struck a chord with Luka the way the guitar had, so he hadn’t noticed when it went missing.

He carefully climbed down from the stepstool with his prize and set the case on a shorter stack of boxes so that he could open it up and inspect the instrument. He popped up the clasps keeping the case closed and gingerly raised the lid.

In general, the violin and bow looked a little neglected and in need of love, but all of the strings were accounted for, and it _looked_ playable. It was probably horribly out of tune, but…

Luka picked up the block of rosin and rubbed it back and forth along the hairs of the bow, not sure if he’d applied too much or not enough. He figured that he’d probably find out once he started playing.

Carefully, he scooped the violin from its case as if it were a baby and lifted it into position, tucking it under his chin. He raised the bow, not pressing down on any of the strings with his left hand, leaving them open and free to ring as he drew the bow across them.

The violin squawked indignantly, insulted by Luka’s attempt.

Luka let out a short burst of laughter. He tried again, pressing a little harder until he could feel the hair of the bow gripping the strings as he pulled it across.

The violin shrieked dissonantly—as expected, horribly out of tune.

Luka chuckled as he lowered the instrument, setting it along with the bow down in the case to rest while he got out his phone.

He was used to working with six strings on his guitar, so he wasn’t sure quite where to start with four. A Google search quickly revealed that the [strings were](https://www.amromusic.com/violin-position-chart) supposed to be G, D, A, and E. He followed each string up the neck of the [violin](https://newt.phys.unsw.edu.au/~jw/graphics/violin.jpg) to the corresponding peg, gently plucking each string as he carefully turned the peg back and forth until it sounded true.

Taking a deep breath, he drew the bow across the strings once more and beamed as a rich sound vibrated to life, high and sweet and resonating with his bones.

He set the instrument to the side once more and reached for his phone again, looking up a finger chart for first position. He found F sharp on the E string and grinned like a madman as the violin wailed beautifully.

_That_ was the sound his sorrow needed to transform the agony of having his beloved torn from him into a melody. His guitar had worked to express joy and melancholy and frustration and amusement, but the violin was the voice he need to give his sorrow form. _This_ was the instrument he needed to allow his soul to cry.

Hours slipped by as Luka experimented, getting to know the instrument and figuring out how to produce the sounds he needed to put his feelings to music.

Frankly, it was rough. Luka had always been a talented musician, easily able to pick up an instrument and befriend it, but the violin was not something to be taken lightly. It was a proud, prickly instrument that knew it deserved respect. It wasn’t forgiving like a harp or piano. It demanded precision and discipline before it would deign to sing.

The violin was a prima donna whose heart Luka would have to work hard to soften. He’d need hours, days, months before he could successfully woo her. He was patient and willing, knowing it would be worth it in the end. It had been months since Luka had wanted anything besides Adrien this much. It had been since August that something had felt this right.

The violin resonated with Luka in a way only his guitar had before, and he knew he had to learn to play her. She could understand his pain like no one else and transform it into something cathartic. She could help him get the misery out so that it didn’t eat him alive from the inside anymore. The violin could draw out the venom.

He just had to practice until he was able to match the instrument’s potential.

It was dark when Juleka went to fetch her brother.

“You still at it?” she called from the doorway.

He didn’t respond.

She wasn’t surprised. He hadn’t noticed her the other three times she’d come to check on him, and she was familiar with the way he went into a trance sometimes, unable to register the world around him when he was caught up in his music.

“Hey.” She carefully reached out and tapped his arm, fully expecting the way he jumped at her touch.

“Juliet! Hey. You startled me,” he gasped, heartrate still in the stratosphere from the scare.

She snickered, grinning smugly. “Yeah, I know. You got caught up in the music. Are your fingers bleeding or did your guitar callouses help?”

Luka looked down at his left hand and inspected the damage. His fingers were a little sore after not playing anything for a few months, but it didn’t look like he’d hurt himself. “Nope. Seems okay.”

Juleka nodded. “Good. Why don’t you pack up and come eat, Luc?”

Luka’s brow furrowed into a frown. “I just ate an hour ago.”

Juleka shook her head, letting out a fond sigh of exasperation. “No, you didn’t. You’ve been in here for _hours_ playing that thing. Come have dinner.”

“_Dinner_?” Luka pulled out his phone and sucked in a breath when he saw the time. “Oh, yikes.”

“Yep,” Juleka confirmed. “Come on.”

Obediently, Luka cleaned off and packed up the violin and took it with them into the main cabin where Rose and Anarka were sitting on the couch, waiting with the herb-roasted chicken, baked potatoes, salad, and fresh baguette on the table.

“You found a violin,” Anarka observed with a satisfied smile.

“We heard you playing,” Rose added brightly. “You sound great! Well…not at first, but the last two hours you’ve sounded great!”

Luka smiled sheepishly as he headed to the kitchen to wash his hands before joining them. “Sorry for the noise.”

Anarka waved away his concern with a roll of her eyes. “Couffaines don’t apologize for making noise. Besides, like Rose said, the last few hours you’ve been sounding downright tonal.”

“Small miracles,” he sighed, breaking off a piece of the baguette and scooping some salad onto his plate.

“Seriously, Luc.” Anarka rested a hand on his arm, catching his gaze. “You sound good. We’re all happy you’re making music, so go for it. It’s okay if it’s three in the morning. Go for it.”

He looked down at his plate, chewing on his bottom lip, and then gazed back up at Juleka and Rose. “Yeah?”

“Yeah,” Juleka agreed, and Rose nodded, looking earnest.

Luka looked back to his mother. “Do you happen to know if I have any money in my account? I’d like to take the violin into the shop to get some love. I’m honestly surprised I didn’t break all four of the strings today. I have a feeling I’m going to be playing a lot, so I’d like to get her in working order.”

“If you don’t have the money, I do. We’ll get her playing for you,” Anarka assured, giving his arm a pat before pulling away.

“Thanks, Maman,” he replied, a little surprised at how readily she was supporting this whim of his.

“Mmhm. Now, eat up, Luc,” she encouraged.

Rose reached across the table to deposit some of the chicken onto his plate with a grin.

He returned the grin with a small smile of his own even as he thought about how Adrien didn’t like chicken.

As it turned out, the violin was not a cure-all.

Some days Luka played obsessively. Instead of sleeping the entire day, he practiced the hours away. Instead of lying awake at night, he played mournful tunes somewhat unskillfully.

There were other days where he lacked the energy and didn’t get out of bed, and once or twice a week he still drank himself senseless.

It _did_ feel like things were slowly getting a little better, though.

At least Luka now had an outlet for his feelings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, many thanks to my friends Mireille and Helena who answered questions about rosin shelf-life. Secondly, I don't play violin. I have some experience with the guitar and about an hour and a half of playing the cello, but I do not currently play any string instruments, so you have my sincerest apologies if I got anything wrong. I did a lot of Google research for this, but I fear that that doesn't make up for not having ever tuned a violin or applied rosin or played a note personally. So, I did my best, and I meant well. Hopefully the spirit of that came through.
> 
> A translation note: Anarka calls Luka "Ma Baleine" meaning "My Whale". I couldn’t decide if Juleka was “mon raquin” (shark) or “mon lamantin” (manatee). Maybe Anarka uses both. Maybe Juleka is manatee and /Rose/ is shark. Hm.
> 
> Well. Thanks for reading, guys. I hope you enjoyed it. Unfortunately, I'm going to be taking a break from the Jabberwocky/Daisy universe for a while to work on some fluffier, less emotionally draining Marichat/Adrienette stuff. I've been working on Serendipity (the fifty Marichat/Adrienette kiss prompts piece), and I have the rough drafts of the first ten kisses done, so I'm going to polish those up and start posting that story next week.
> 
> How do we feel about Monday/Thursday updates? Do those days work for you guys? Are there other days of the week that work better? Barring something getting in the way, I'm planning on posting the first chapter of Serendipity on Thursday, 05/14/2020, so be looking forward to that.
> 
> Take care everyone, and I hope to see you for Serendipity soon!
> 
> References:  
Serialism: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Serialism  
Atonality: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atonality  
Twelve-Tone Method: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twelve-tone_technique  
Violin Fingering Chart: https://www.amromusic.com/violin-position-chart  
Anatomy of a Violin: https://newt.phys.unsw.edu.au/~jw/graphics/violin.jpg


End file.
